JC/Chris #2 - college

"Oh!" JC looked up from the table, squinting in the dark. "I didn't ... expect to see you here. Um. Tonight." And he hadn't ... he and Chris had been talking, playing some strange kind of cat-and-mouse game that he wasn't sure either one of them understood, and he'd come with Justin and Joey to the bar to try and get his mind *off* him. But that was going to be impossible, with his dark, quirky smile right in front of his face.

"I'm not actually here," said Chris in a laughably ominous voice. "I'm just a figment of your imagination. Wait ... do engineers have imaginations? Cause that could really fuck this up ... "

"Ha ha," JC smirked, his pulse racing a little but trying his best to look unaffected. "I should tell you, though, if you really *were* a figment of my imagination ... well, let's say you'd be wearing something ... else."

"My Batman outfit is at the cleaners," said Chris apologetically. "But I'll ty and have it back for next time." He lifted his glass and clinked it against JC's without explanation. "I wasn't sure engineers were allowed to have fun, either."

"As long as you have the car outside, I'll forgive you." He took a long sip of his drink, waited for a comment on 'that pink shit' that didn't come this time. "You've seen me out before. Don't front like this is all *that* surprising."

Chris grinned at him in acknowledgment. "Yeah, the batmobile awaits," he said, not even trying to keep a straight face this time. "You ever wonder why he drove such an ugly car? I mean, did chicks think that was cool?"

"The later versions weren't that bad," JC yawned. "Kitschy, and all that." He rose an eyebrow at Chris, then scooted over to make room for him at the table. "And you should know better than to ask me anything about the workings of the female mind."

"Maybe the car was supposed to impress Robin," said Chris, sitting down in an empty chair. "I bet Batman was a leather freak. You think?" His attention was lost for a moment, though, as the black light went on over the dance floor -- over the room -- and he began jerking around in it in what may have been dancing and may have been a seizure.

JC watched him stoically for a minute, then shook his head and glanced around the room to try and locate Joey and Justin. When he did, though, he kind of wished he hadn't: Joey had his hands up Justin's shirt, Justin was gripping the waistband of Joey's jeans for dear life, and they looked like they were about to swallow each other whole.

He cleared his throat and glanced back at Chris. "Seriously. I didn't think I'd see you."

Chris stopped abruptly when JC spoke and turned to look at him again. "I wasn't planning on coming out," he admitted after a moment. "I have a shitload of research to do. Hmm. Maybe that's *why* I'm here. Procrastination at its finest." He paused. "You didn't think you'd see me? Or you didn't think you'd see me *here*?"

"I don't ... know," JC admitted. He'd seen him at that place, before, back when Joey and Justin were still getting together, so it wasn't *that* ... it just wasn't the sort of place one went without an agenda. But he didn't exactly know how to ask Chris about it. He had the unique capability to make him tongue-tied. "I just ... know you're busy."

"Yeah," said Chris, finally stopping talking and moving long enough to take a sip of his drink. "Everyone's gotta wind down *some*times, right?" Which JC had to grin at, because even when Chris was 'winding down' he was all wound up. "Even you." Then he reached out and pinched JC's cheek.

"I'm cool," JC replied softly, reaching a hand up to touch where Chris had touched him, but stopping in time. "I mean, I'm good. On babysitting duty tonight, though," he said, gesturing at where Joey was now biting at Justin's neck.

"Your friends ditch you again?" said Chris, sounding sympathetic. "They do that a lot, huh."

"No, it's not like that," JC protested, before remembering it kind of exactly *was* like that, since Justin and Joey had gotten together. He didn't get to see Joey any more, and as happy as he was for him, he missed him. Missed being close to someone like that. "They're just ... honeymooning."

Chris looked out at the dancefloor again and watched them for a moment, strangely expressionless. "They're pretty hot for each other," he agreed as he turned back. "Probably don't even notice you're there, most of the time."

JC stared at him, trying to figure out if he was trying to start something, or just didn't know that you shouldn't be that blunt with someone you didn't know well. Or if he just didn't care. "They notice," he said finally. "They'll be over here in a few minutes."

"I mean," said Chris, lowering his voice a little, his eyes glinting, "if they aren't noticing you're here, then ... um ... maybe they wouldn't notice if you *weren't* here, for a little while ... "

"Oh," JC swallowed, catching *that* look, and the implication, and trying to figure out if he was still in the playing hard-to-get phase of him and Chris circling around each other like they had been. He tore his eyes away, glanced back out at the floor. "Depends on where 'weren't here' was," he mumbled. "Sometimes I'm pathetically bad at disguising the aftermath of 'weren't here.'"

Chris leaned back again, and only then did JC realize how close he'd gotten. "Why would you want to disguise it?" he said with a laugh, but he was shaking his head. "I just meant ... outside. Less noise. Make talkie better, yes?"

JC relaxed a little: relieved, and -- he had to admit to himself -- maybe a tiny bit disappointed. But if he wasn't at the breaking point yet, if there was even going to be one, he wasn't surprised Chris wasn't either. "Okay, yes," he smiled, downing the rest of his drink, which probably made the scenario look more tawdry than it was bound to be. "Lead the way."

Chris drained his as well, and slammed the glass back down on the table in satisfaction, a mischievous grin on his face. "All right," he said, and he brushed up against JC on his way by -- as they both tended to -- but he didn't even attempt any other kind of contact as he led JC to the door.

"So, research, huh," JC said awkwardly, stuffing his hands in his pockets and shivering a little as they made their way outside. "For the thesis? How's it coming?" He always felt stupid making conversation with him, like it was something he should already know the answer to.

"Slowly," said Chris, giving him a smile this time that seemed somehow more genuine than the others. "I should be reading right now. But you can only do so much before your eyes fall out of your head and you want to run screaming naked into the night. So yeah, I'm here instead."

"Which, really, depending on what you take, may not end up all that differently, huh?" JC smiled, taking Chris's smile as a cue.

Chris laughed and nodded. "Okay, you win that one," he conceded. "So what are you supposed to be doing tonight that you're not?" he asked. "And don't tell me nothing. There's always something."

"Actually, really, nothing," JC admitted, feeling as surprised as Chris looked. "I'm doing all this independent study and I'm, like, done with everything. Since I've had plenty of time to myself lately." He knew he sounded a little needy, but what the fuck. He asked, and JC didn't have to prove anything.

Chris made a face. "And I bet the honeymooners don't even know that, right?" he said, almost gentle. "Well hey, if you get bored enough you can summarize a few books for me so I'll know if I'm wasting my time with them or not." Then he laughed. "Doesn't that sound like *fun*? That's why all the boys want to date me."

"Well, after the ass, and the facial hair," JC mumbled under his breath. Kinda hoping Chris heard it, but not ballsy enough to say it out loud. "If they don't have to do with higher-order number theory or engineering principles, or 21st century Europe, I'm not your guy."

"Eighteenth century Europe," said Chris, brushing up against him. JC couldn't tell if it was intentional or not. "Is that close enough? I mean, it's the same shit with, you know, different leaders and different countries and, um, technology. Right?"

"Yeah, and more empires," JC added. "But otherwise." He stood still, wondering if Chris might touch him again if he didn't do anything to scare him off. "Um. Where do you usually do your research?"

"In the little hovel known as home," laughed Chris, tugging on Chris's arm so he'd follow him as he started down the sidewalk. "Oh, wait, is that not what you were asking?" He turned his head toward JC and half-grinned. "You really interested in what I study?"

"Well, yeah," JC replied, brow furrowed, walking a little slower and a little behind. "I mean, I meant *where* you worked, but... yeah, I'm interested." He bit his lip. "Um. Where're we going?"

Chris shrugged. "Just walking," he said. "Sometimes interesting things happen when you just walk." They walked in an odd silence for a moment. "So, um, yeah. European history. Which you knew. Eighteenth century. Which you didn't. And, um, women's rights. Which I bet you never even would have *guessed* in a million years."

JC barked out a short laugh, then looked over sheepishly. "Uh ... no, I guess I wouldn'tve. Except ... I dunno, you have a little of that 'pulling for the underdog' in you." JC blushed when he realized how that might've sounded, and he was very *very* glad he wasn't talking to a woman. "Uh ... not sure that came out right."

"No, probably not," acknowledged Chris with a laugh of his own. "So now you know all there is to know about me. See? I'm an open book." But of course he was anything but, and JC watched him curiously to see what tangent he would go on next. Except he didn't.

They walked quietly for several minutes, actually, before JC cleared his throat again. "So, um ... when you procrastinate, is it ... I mean, just getting your mind off work? Or is it more ... like, you have an agenda." He wasn't sure why he was asking that, except that he felt like maybe Chris expected that it was his turn to say something, and he really *did* want to know why he was at that club. And maybe, a little, why he hadn't called to tell JC.

Chris actually looked embarassed, but only for a very brief moment. "You guys go every Thursday," he said, looking not quite at JC. "The three of you. I figured it was your thing or something. So I figured ... I need a break, JC's at the club, why don't I take a break at the club?" He was grinning again when he finally looked up at his face. "It's all logical."

"Oh," JC paused, his mind racing with that a little, surprised that Chris had even noticed that. *Very* surprised. Not that he didn't think there was a mutual ... something ... there, but just that Chris had seemed like more of a guy's guy to that point. Someone that wouldn't notice details. "But the club left a little to be desired?"

"It had what I was looking for," said Chris evasively. "Do you ever look up at the sky and make your own constellations? Like, stuff they wouldn't have thought of when they made them up, like trucks and computers and toothbrushes ... "

"No," JC said bluntly, watching Chris's face instead of looking up in the sky. "Engineers don't have imaginations, remember?" He stepped closer, really trying to catch Chris's eye this time. "I wish on stars, though. Sometimes."

"Maybe you're a very special engineer," said Chris with a quirky grin. "What do you wish for?"

"Princes," JC said idly, glancing away, knowing that wouldn't make any sense to Chris but wanting to say it out loud anyway. "Pretty boys. For Joey to be happy. Cures for loneliness. Sometimes -- not often, but sometimes -- just a good random fuck." He closed his eyes and shivered again. "What you expected?"

When he opened his eyes again, Chris was looking at him with wide serious eyes. "You and me need to get a cup of coffee," he said softly, and JC hadn't imagined he could even speak so soft. "And you," he added, "need to give me a smile."

JC couldn't help it, seeing Chris so strangely serious. "Okay," he said, trying to make it go away, and laughing a little when it just got bigger. "Why do we need to do these things?" He wasn't sure if Chris meant they'd get coffee *now*; he felt guilty for a second, for leaving Joey and Justin, but Chris was right ... they wouldn't notice for a while.

"Because you're pretty when you smile," said Chris, and started leading him down the street again without further explanation. JC was left without any real choice but to follow.

"Um, thanks," JC said, catching up with him by hurrying a little and letting his hand hover behind Chris's shoulder. "For saying that. You don't have to ... I mean. I don't need cheering up, or anything. I didn't mean to be maudlin."

Chris suddenly turned around and walked backwards, smiling when JC's hand was suddenly closer to his neck than his shoulder. "I never say anything I don't mean," he said, cheerful again. "You *are* pretty when you smile. Even when you're not smiling at me."

"Thanks," JC said again, knowing he was blushing, *again*, and trying to figure out just *why* this guy threw him off his game so much. He shoved his hands in his pockets, and wished he had his coat. "Wait'll you see me *really* dressed up."

Chris's grin widened as he turned back around. "Does that mean you're gonna get dressed up for me?" he said. "Gonna dazzle me?"

"Gonna ask me out somewhere where I can?" JC volleyed back

"Guess that rules out Taco Bell, huh," laughed Chris, and JC didn't think he was fooling himself when it occurred to him that it sounded like a nervous laugh.

"Nothing wrong with Taco Bell," JC replied carefully. Really just wanting Chris to ask him out, already, if he was going to. Except he was realizing that wasn't how he worked. "Maybe leather'll be a little over-the-top, but who knows."

"Not if we go to the right Taco Bell," said Chris, looking back over his shoulder at JC. "And on a Friday. Did you know that Friday is leather night at some Taco Bells?"

"Friday's feather boa night at our place, so anything's possible," JC replied, reaching his hand near Chris's back again and having to hop a little to keep up.

"Somehow I can't picture Joey in a feather boa," countered Chris, shaking his head. "I wouldn't recommend you wear one to Taco Bell, though. They might steal it. Bloody thieves there, you know. They stole my top hat once."

JC giggled, letting that one go, then hopping again. "Slow down, man. Wherever we're we going for coffee, it'll still be there if we don't sprint."

"I'm the short one here," said Chris. "You telling me you can't keep up." But he did slow down until JC was beside him. "We have two choices, actually," he said, pausing on the sidewalk in front of a 3-storey walk-up. "For coffee, I mean. There's a nice little coffeshop up at the end of the block, open all hours. Or ... there's here."

JC looked up at the building, thinking he shouldn'tve been surprised. And thinking a little harder about how much he wanted to maintain the playing-hard-to-get thing. If he hadn't already lost it. "And here is ... your apartment?" he asked, trying to sound casual.

"Yeah," said Chris, looking back of his shoulder, up at the third floor. "I do actually have coffee. This isn't just an elaborate ploy to get laid or something. Trust me, my apartment is anything but seductive. I'd have better luck with the coffeeshop."

JC's mouth dropped open a little at the blunt comment, wondering if he was supposed to protest that wasn't what he'd been thinking. He couldn't keep UP with Chris. "Well," he said, fidgeting. "I guess where we go depends on ... I mean. That presupposes you know what I find seductive, doesn't it."

"Which I don't," agreed Chris readily, one hand on the railing leading up to his front door, cocking his head to the side as he looked at him. "But I guess the first thing to determine is whether you're willing to be seduced ... "

"That is the question, isn't it," JC replied, quite certain he had as little of an idea about the answer as Chris did. And that it would very much depend on which way Chris leaned.

He brushed past him up the stairs, and turned to cock his head in reponse. "Coming?"

Chris turned right around and give him a broad, lopsided grin. "It takes imagination to come up with double entendres, you know," he said as he unlocked the front door for them. "And I'm going to choose to believe that was intentional. If I'm wrong, just let me live with my delusion."

"But that's the most obvious one ever," JC smiled, pressing close behind Chris, keeping his voice steady with some effort. "I'm still not sure it's evidence of imagination, intentional or not."

"Well, at the very least it's a sign of intelligence," he said, starting up the stairs. "Which is a nice change from the last person I had up here, though he did have imagination in abundance. Did you know what you could do with dishsoap? Anyway ... i'm on the third."

"Well," JC shrugged, following obediently. "You know what they say. You don't fuck their brains." If that was a little snarky, well ... maybe there were things he was bitter about.

"Yeah, well, they're wrong when they say that," said Chris, bounding up to the top of the stairs and jinkling his keys before opening his apartment door. "You ever made love to someone's mind? Most erotic thing EVER. I swear. Broke my brain for a while."

JC didn't have a response to that, trying to get his mouth to work after hearing the easy way the word "erotic" tumbled from this sarcastic man's lips. "Sounds intimate," he finally murmured, peeking over Chris's shoulder into the apartment.

"Yeah, it's a mess," said Chris, flipping on a light. "You were expecting something else from someone like me? Just kinda ... weave your way into the kitchen. It's safe in there." He nudged some CD cases out of the way with one foot and some books with the other, then swooped down and picked up a little mewling cat under one arm.

"Oh," JC blinked, watching the cat, then watching Chris, then finally stepping cautiously toward the back of the apartment. It was cluttered, sure, but it was warm, and there were books *everywhere*, and that always made him more comfortable. "Would you like me to put the coffee on?" he called back, once he found the lightswitch in the kitchen.

"Yeah, go ahead," called Chris close behind him. "The good stuff's in the freezer." He cooed at the cat then let him go just outside the kitchen door as he stepped in. "And if you know how to make that infernal machine stop spitting right before it finishes off a pot, I'm all for that."

"I'm more of a theoretical engineer," JC frowned at the appliance, then grabbed the canister from the freezer. "Which makes me pretty much worthless, I guess. What's the cat's name?"

"Rocky," said Chris, then waggled a finger at him. "*Don't* laugh. And don't try and say you weren't going to -- I can see your lips twiching, JC."

"I had a dog named Company once, so I'm not really one to talk about pet names," JC admitted, starting the coffee pot and then leaning back on the counter restlessly. "Oh, can I borrow your phone?"

Chris looked up from where he was waggling his fingers at the wandering cat now. "Yeah, sure," he said, gesturing toward it. "As long as it's not to call a cab or anything. I mean, we haven't even had coffee yet ... "

JC laughed, and touched Chris's elbow on his way past. "No, I'm just paging Joey. I'm enough of a diva to make *you* call me the cab."

"I don't *do* cabs," said Chris, flicking his imaginary long, flowing locks back over his shoulder. "Guess you're going to have to stay. How do you take your coffee anyway? I'm pretty sure there's milk in the fridge that hasn't turned. And I *know* there's sugar."

"Oh, black, actually," JC replied distractedly, concentrating on wording the page to Joey just right. He couldn't help a shy expression as he turned back around, though, even if it was inopportune right then -- he couldn't remember being in someone's apartment with less of a clue about how the evening was going to end.

Chris sniffed the milk, seeming completely unaware of the attention on him, and made a face, dropping it in the trash. "Good thing," he said, and further explanation was unnecessary. Then he started humming to himself as he dug around in the cupboard for a pair of mugs.

JC walked up behind him, leaning over his shoulder and reaching for a mug that was out of Chris's reach but just barely within his own. "Here," he said softly, handing it to him, then backing up and brushing a piece of hair out of his own face.

Chris stared at it for a moment, as though he couldn't figure out how it had gotten into his hand, then turned around. "You finished with the phone?" he asked, setting the mug on the surprisingly clean counter behind him. "I didn't hear you."

"Well, I was just doing a page," JC shrugged, wondering if he shouldn'tve gotten that close, then jumping a little as the coffee pot did, indeed, start spitting at them. "He won't call, though. I mean, if you were concerned." He'd given Joey the "don't wait up" code, which along with Chris's number, he was sure he'd get a lot of shit about the next day if he didn't have something to show for it.

"S'okay," said Chris, taking a clearly familiar step away from the coffeepot. "If he called in the middle of the night I'd just hang up on him like everyone else. No harm, no foul." He gave JC a toothy grin as he grabbed up the mugs again, the coffeepot having finished.

"You don't have class tomorrow, do you?" JC asked, hanging back by the fridge. "I mean, other than you already saying you were procrastinating from stuff that needed to get done, I'm not gonna cause you too much grief by being here?"

"My only plan for tomorrow," said Chris as he poured the coffee, dumping a few spoonfuls of sugar in his own, "was to buy batteries for my discman and hole up in the library archives for a few hours. So no, definitely no grief." He handed the mug over -- neon green with a happy face on it. "Here you go," he said, "Enjoy."

"Thank you," JC said politely, blowing gently across the top of the mug and watching Chris carefully. "Speaking of seductive places, though. The library archives? They should charge by the hour there."

The grin that Chris gave him after that absolutely outdid any of the ones that came before, and JC knew he had to have said something right. "It's a good place to spend a Friday night," he agreed, "if you're the type."

"It is," JC acknowledged, knowing very well what tomorrow night was. "As close as some people get to fucking someone's brains, at least."

"So yeah," said Chris, sipping his coffee and nonchalantly leaning against the kitchen counter. "You wanna go out some time? I promise it won't be to Taco Bell ... unless you want."

"I don't know," JC teased softly, with a straight face -- biting his lip to keep from smiling giddily at the affectedly casual invitation. "Are you going to rule out getting laid beforehand again?"

"I never rule out getting laid," said Chris solemnly, his eyes twinkling and his leg bouncing a little in anticipation.

"Then yes," JC sipped his coffee again, blaming it for the flush on his cheeks. "I think I'd like that a lot. Thought you'd never ask? There're a couple more cliches I can fit in, I think ... "

"I'm sure there are," said Chris, his smile hidden by the mug now but his eyes easily readable. "We should sit down before I jump you or something. Kitchen table or living room, your choice. Just depends on how much of an aversion you have to cat hair."

JC coughed a little as he took too large of a swallow of the hot liquid, then blinked away tears as he looked at Chris and tried to figure out if the jumping comment was a joke. He loved his sense of humor, it was so *smart*, but it made it hard to tell when he was being serious. "I'm ... allergic, actually," he admitted.

Chris looked at him in wide-eyed alarm. "You mean I have to *clean* from now on?" he said. "Damn. Okay ... kitchen table it is."

"It's okay," JC protested as he sat down in one of the chairs. "It's not ... I mean, that's what Benedryl's for." His heart was pounding again, with all the little comments Chris was making, like the "from now on," that he just didn't know how seriously to take. "I never pegged you for a cat person."

"I wasn't," admitted Chris as he slipped into one of the chairs across from JC. "Rocky was my sister's cat, then she moved into this place that didn't allow pets and ... " He sighed dramatically. "I'm a sucker for my sisters' pouts. So I ended up with a cat named Rock n roll who sheds all over my sofa." But JC had seen him with the cat when they'd come in and knew better; no matter how it had happened, Chris didn't seem to mind in the least.

"You have a sofa?" JC teased, resting his hands in front of him on the table. "No, I'm kidding. I like your place. Even the cat. I'm not sure what kind of impression you have of me, if you thought I wouldn't. I mean, I live with *Joey*."

"Engineers," said Chris sagely. "No matter what you seem like on the outside, you have this orderly thing going on." He wiggled and gestured the word orderly, coming up with a motion that was anything but. "Besides ... the impression I have of Joey is that he never makes it out of his bedroom, anyway ... "

JC's smile slipped a little at that reminder, and he stared at his fingernails. "Well, not as much as he used to," he admitted. "But you've seen Justin. Can you really blame him?"

Chris laughed brightly, making the whole thing seem just a little bit better. "Yes, I *have* seen Justin. He's not my type, but even I can admit he's a hot one. And practically jailbait, if I'm not mistaken ... "

"Oh, you're not mistaken," JC snorted. "He's a baby. But Joey snatched him up before I think he got to fully realize how hot he is. And the kid's smitten, so." He shrugged. Chris had seen the two of them together. He didn't need JC to get into it.

"And they raise the temperature of any room their in. Bet they're good for business. The club should be paying *them*." Chris shoved his empty coffee mug away. "If I try and kiss you, are you gonna complain about my coffee breath?"

JC blinked slowly, then pushed his own away. He was handling all of Chris's from-left-field comments fairly well, he thought. He just had to allow himself time to react. "Are you?" he asked calmly in reply, licking his lips in preparation just in case.

"Am I gonna try and kiss you?" asked Chris, moving closer. "Or am I gonna complain about *you* coffee breath?"

"Yes," JC said, his mouth curving into a smile, knowing the answer to the sceond question, crossing his fingers on the first.

"Your coffee breath is almost as bad as mine," said Chris with a wry grin, then leaned in and kissed him.

JC lifted his chin when their noses bumped, a little surprised but figuring he shouldn't have been. Realizing that Chris was a very, very good kisser, and not at all surprised about that. He was hot and confident and a little demanding and JC just hoped the mewling he heard was from the cat and not his own throat. Chris pulled away with the same smoothness with which he had come, sitting back into his chair. There was an awkward silence for a moment where they both caught their breath and licked their lips, and then Chris grinned.

"So how was the breath?"

"There was breathing?" JC mumbled, running a shaky hand through his hair. He put on a pretty good act, he knew; unaffected, stoic, not the type to have his feathers ruffled easily. But this was Chris, and he hadn't been on solid ground with him since he met the guy, and he was only getting more fascinated.

"Good point," said Chris, and JC almost didn't catch him leaning in. "We're gonna have to try that again. Remember to breath this time." When his lips met JC's, though, there was definitely no breathing going on, on either side.

And the mewling was definitely him, especially when Chris sucked gently on his lower lip. And when he followed Chris's mouth when he tried to pull away that time, not wanting him to stop. It had been too fucking long since he'd been kissed, longer than that since he was kissed well, and forever since he was kissed by someone he could actually be *interested* in.

Chris met him halfway, both leaning out of their chairs, still kissing and both too hesitant yet to reach out for one another. It might have been absurd if it wasn't so damn hot. Finally -- finally! -- Chris laced his fingers through the hair at the base of JC's skull and held them together as they kissed.

JC sighed into the kiss and gripped the edge of the table, scooting his chair closer suddenly so they didn't have to reach so far to touch each other. He touched Chris's face tentatively, running a finger down his jawline, refusing to open his eyes as long as their lips were still touching.

Chris finally did pull away, his hand still tangled in JC's hair. "I changed the sheets this morning," he said, somewhat breathless, licking his lips. JC frowned in confusion, and Chris quickly added. "I mean ... so no cat hair. On the bed. No cat hair."

JC opened his mouth three different times to say something. He couldn't believe he was doing this, really, except wasn't it exactly what he was thinking when Chris asked him to go outside at the club? And then when he asked him to come up? And then when he left the page for Joey?

JC wasn't a prude, and he wasn't shy, and it wasn't like they hadn't spent several weeks dancing around each other. And the sofa was out of the question, unless he wanted to swell up like some bizarre obese version of himself.

But he wasn't going to make it too easy for him, either.

"Man, you take procrastinating seriously," he murmured, looking up at Chris from under his eyelashes, one of a very few calculated looks in his arsenal.

Chris was silent for a moment, his lips slightly parted as he gazed at JC, then his eyes moved slowly up and down JC's body. "If I tell you I vacuumed," he said finally, his voice still light, "will that turn you on even more?"

"It's hard to say," JC replied, not certain Chris needed to do much else than what he was already doing, to turn him on more. "I'm not sure how I feel about the implication that you assumed you'd be having company."

"I'd be lying," said Chris with a smirk, "but I might've said it anyway. I did clean the bathtub though ... but I did that just for me ... " He moved his fingers restlessly through JC's hair, and like he often did JC got the impression that Chris was always moving in some way or another.

"Well ... to put your mind at ease, you don't need to tell me any of that," JC admitted, closing his eyes again to the sensation of Chris petting him like that. "The sheets thing got me good to go."

"Dude, you had me at hello," teased Chris, trying to stand up and bring JC up with him. He was unable to leave his hand in JC hair so he had to content himself with taking his hand instead. Turned out that both of them were a bit sweaty-palmed and trembling. "It's this way ... "

JC followed him readily, hooking their fingers together and walking too close behind him. "You hid it well," JC whispered over his shoulder. "Me having you, not the bed."

Turned out the bed *was* hidden, though, and Chris had to brush a few clothes off of it and chase the cat out before they could even do anything. "Well, you know ... guy can't be too careful ... " he said. "You wanna make sure you're right about a person before you jump in."

"Someday you'll have to fill me in on what I said, or did, tonight, that eased your fears," JC said, surprised at Chris's caution but knowing the other man wouldn't want it commented on. He knelt on the bed before Chris had a chance to, and then stretched out on his side. "You were right about me?"

Chris looked him up and down again before answering. "I hope so," he said finally, crawling up next to him. "It's like ... you get to this point where you can't really find out any more about a person without getting close, right? So I think I know you enough to know that I really want to know you."

"I think that made sense," JC murmured, reaching for Chris's neck this time, guiding his body down on top of his. And then kissing him, gently. He *really* was surprised to learn that Chris was gunshy about being with him. But the reason for that was the kind of stuff he could find out *after* getting close.

"I'm glad it made sense to one of us," said Chris, finally kissing him back again with renewed enthusiasm. "Enough sense to keep you here, anyway."

"You said I couldn't leave," JC reminded him, slipping his mouth along Chris's jaw to his ear. This felt exciting to him in a way that the past several hook-ups hadn't been: there was Joey, and that just defied explanation, and then random guys he *knew* he'd never see again. And before that, good friends that kissed well, sure, and were good in bed, but ... he didn't *know* Chris. Had no idea what he'd be like. That almost more than anything else had JC harder than he'd been in months.

"You're a very good listener," said Chris approvingly, his lips hot against JC's skin as he began nipping and lapping at him. "I bet that'll make up for any lack of imagination you might show."

"I think my sexual prowess was just insulted a priori," JC moaned, pressed harder into the mattress by Chris's weight. "Did you mean to do that?"

"It was a compliment," insisted Chris, nudging JC's legs open with his knee so they could move closer still. "In my own special way. You'll be hearing plenty more of them, too."

"You're going to have to convince me," JC sighed, titlting his head back, his thighs spreading so easily he had to curse his slutty tendencies. "Sure sounded like an insult."

Chris's thigh slipped in between JC's as he lay atop him. "You have the prettiest hair," he said, instead of trying to explain himself. "Every time I see you I want to reach out and touch it. Next time we're in the library together can I play with your hair?"

"See, that I recognize," JC mumured, nuzzling against Chris's hand before opening his eyes and fixing him with his most intense fuck-me-or-at-least-kiss-me look. His voice dropped. "And you can do anything you want."

"In the library?" teased Chris before kissing him fiercely, his fingers twisting in JC's hair.. "But they have rules, there."

"I'm sure that's stopped you before," JC replied dryly, very desperately wanting another fierce kiss. And for Chris to tug a little harder while he was at it. "I was actually talking about right now."

"Anything?" repeated Chris suggestively, shifting on top of him and rubbing them together for a too-brief moment. "Oh, the possibilities. But how about we start with this?" And with that he pulled JC's head up to him and kissed him again.

JC moaned a little, scrambling to get his elbows beneath him so he could push up against Chris's body. Chris was really, really good at that.

"You're really good at that," he panted, lifting the leg that Chris was straddling a little higher.

Chris slid down against him smoothly; JC hadn't expected that kind of grace or deterity from him, not with what he'd seen so far, but he wasn't complaining.

"Good at what?" he asked innocently, smiling at him.

"Making my toes fucking curl," JC muttered, tugging on the back of his neck again. "C'mere, Jesus." Chris was so completely unlike other boys he'd ever gone for, physically, and he was having to question his previous tastes very seriously.

"But we haven't even *done* anything yet," laughed Chris, and it wasn't a mean laugh at all. In fact, it sounded kinda ... delighted. "Mmm ... this is great. You taste fabulous. Not coffeeish at all."

"You're desensitized to it," JC explained. "The coffee was too hot, killed all your taste buds." He tried to chase Chris's lips down again, but didn't want to tell him to be quiet, either. He liked hearing him laugh.

"Maybe," agreed Chris, licking at JC's lips. "Doesn't mean you don't taste good, though. Like cherries." He smiled broadly, triumphantly. "Your drinks had cherries," he said happily, then kissed him again just to lick at the inside of his mouth.

JC let him in, arching his shoulders off the bed and shifting his weight so there wasn't any way Chris could miss how badly he wanted this. "If you say anything about girly drinks," he muttered, trying to be threatening and probably not pulling it off.

"Never appreciated them more than right at this moment," said Chris, sliding his lips down to JC's chin, then over to his ear. They were pressed up tight against one another now, and neither could misinterpret the intentions of the other.

"I like you," JC blurted as soon as Chris's teeth closed on his earlobe. "You scare me a little and I can't read you for shit, and you have cats, but I've been ... I've been thinking about you." He pushed his thigh up against Chris's groin a little harder to try and mask his embarrassment. "So ... yeah."

"Cat," correct Chris, licking at the faint bitemark he left. "Just the one." For the first time he moved his body against JC's purposefully, rubbing them together as he sucked at JC's neck.

"Sorry," JC mumbled under his breath, baring his throat more to Chris, running his hands down his back. "'Cause that was the important part of what I just said."

"I heard you," said Chris softly, nuzzling the exposed skin. "Don't worry JC ... I heard you."

"Okay," JC whispered, even more embarrassed, but marginally appeased at the same time. "And I would say I don't do this often, but that'd be as big a lie as the vacuum."

"Usually I'm naked by this point," admitted Chris candidly. Or seemingly candid, anyway. "Actually, I'm usually naked before I get into the bedroom. Guess you're special, huh?"

"If the fact that you're not naked is supposed to be a good thing, I guess," JC said dubiously, looking wide-eyed up at Chris staring down at him. "That gonna take some convincing."

"It means I don't just want to fuck," said Chris. And JC knew that no matter how evasive or joking Chris had been with him -- vacuum aside -- he'd never told him anything but the truth. "It means I think you're better than that."

"Thank you," JC said softly, wondering how Chris could say that when he didn't really know him, but realizing that he'd have said the same thing about him if asked. He smiled. "I'll try to sustain the front, just for you."

"You do that," said Chris with a renewed twinkle, "but keep in mind I might want to see the back, too, hm?"

JC swallowed, hit the back of the head with *that* visual, and blinked at him. "O-okay," he stuttered, fisting his hands tightly in the back of Chris's shirt. "Um. Now?"

Chris laughed softly. "Whenever," he said. "I want to see all of you. What, you didn't figure that out yet? I must really do a number on your genius brain, JC ... " He didn't move to let JC up, leaning in to start kissing him again with more obvious intent than before. This was going somewhere now.

"I don't have a genius brain," JC protested weakly, since he couldn't very well protest the rest of it. Chris had him turned completely upside down and he knew it. He started tugging more desperately on Chris's shirt, growing impatient with the pace. Normally he was the one doing the teasing, not the other way around.

"Is it time to have sex?" asked Chris innocently, propping himself up and lessening the pressure on JC. "Because I'm down with that if it is. Um ... so to speak."

JC laughed, and looked up at Chris, and laughed again. He *needed* this, he *needed* someone that wouldn't let him be serious all the time. Straining to sit up, he kissed Chris's lips quickly and dirtily, then squirmed around underneath him so he was lying on his stomach, Chris draped lightly across his back. "Now would be good," he murmured.

"We need to get those clothes off you," said Chris, leaning over to kiss the back of JC's neck as he reached around him to fumble eagerly with his pants, trying to get them undone. "You like it like this, JC?"

"Yes," JC replied, unashamed. Even though he was fairly sure he'd like it however Chris would give it to him. He lifted his hips to give him a little easier access, pushing up with his hands as Chris started to slip the pants down over his ass.

"Okay," said Chris, utterly non-judgmental as he slipped JC's pants off to mid-thigh, then shuffled down the bed to lick at the small of his back. "You're very pretty from this side, too."

JC felt his eyes roll back in his head at Chris's hot tongue on his skin there, and reached behind his back to tug his shirt off over his head himself. He tossed it on the floor and stretched out, a little, laying his arms spread eagle and playing with the edges of the comforter. "Yeah?"

"Yeah," breathed Chris fervently, sucking at the soft skin there then moving down to lick gently as JC's cheeks, one hand reaching up to touch JC's bare back, the other cupping the lower curve of his ass as he licked. "So pretty."

"I wasn't sure you'd notice," JC murmured, clutching the blankets in wonder at how intimately Chris was touching him, how comfortable he was with being close to JC's body. "I wasn't sure you were interested."

"I hope you're sure now," said Chris, resting his cheek against the curve of JC's ass for the moment. "I hope you don't think I do this with all the boys I meet." He tugged JC's pants down a little further, to his knees, but still left him effectively hobbled as he licked at him with surprising tenderness and enthusiasm.

"I wasn't ... no," sighed JC, pressing his erection into the bed, trying purposefully not to buck back into Chris's hands, his eager mouth. "But I don't want to talk about the other boys you'll meet."

"Why would I want to meet other boys when I have you in my bed?" murmured Chris, bringing his hands down and over to gently push JC's cheeks apart so he could lap at the crack between them. "That would be awfully silly of me."

JC whimpered and jerked his legs farther apart, feeling the fabric of his pants bite into the tendons of his knees, the muscles in his ass flutter and relax in reflex. He'd never had someone do that to him without him asking for it, and never with the practiced, easy confidence of of the puckish man between his thighs.

Chris's hands held him confidently but gently as he worked his way down, then all at once he was gone. JC tried to twist his head to see what was going on, but he found out before he could even complete that motion when he felt Chris pull his pants the rest of the way off his body. Chris settled himself in between the legs that JC spread readily just as soon as he was able, returning to what he'd been doing without hesitation.

"God," JC groaned, watching over his shoulder for a moment until Chris looked up and met his eyes, and he had to glance away. Let himself just feel. "God, Chris." He tried to pull his knees up under him, to spread himself in a hopefully inviting posture. "Either I'm not as pretty as you say," he grunted, "or you have too much self-control."

"You don't like this?" said Chris softly, and until then JC hadn't realized that Chris could even *be* hurt, let alone hurt by something as trivial as that. His hands let go and slid over JC's hips and sides, his body shifting so that he was up on his knees. "Okay, we can just ... " Then he let go of JC's body entirely and stripped his own shirt off.

JC stared at him over his shoulder again, just not *meaning* to do *anything* to ruin what he had thought was a completely comfortable, but still sexy, bantering vibe. Chris was already tugging at his pants before he could get his voice to work. "Chris," he choked out. "Chris, that was ... please don't stop touching me. However you do it, I like it."

Chris was naked when he settled himself in between JC's legs again, pressing gently in the center of his back to get him flat against the bed again. "Then don't question whether or not I think you're pretty," he said as his fingertips moved down JC's spine. "I only lick the prettiest boys."

"Yes, sir," JC breathed, sinking back into the blankets but still keeping his hips raised in the air as much as he could -- not caring if Chris would laugh at him for it, for being probably the most eager bottom he'd seen in quite a while. That was JC, and he didn't apologize for it.

"Mmm, this makes it easier," he said, running his words together messily as he kissed at the small of JC's back again. A prelude for what was to come, he hoped, and he wasn't disappointed. Chris picked up where he left off, holding JC open and licking down the crack between his cheeks again. Only this time Chris made it down as far as his hole, running his tongue over it gently.

JC felt his whole body tingle at the sensation, smiling when Chris seemed pleased rather than amused. "Oh," he panted. "Oh, please, oh." He started drawing a knee up under himself again slowly, needing to just be *open* to Chris.

"Okay," mumbled Chris, his mouth too busy to speak, running his tongue over JC's hole a few times with increasing pressure then poking just the tip of his tongue inside. His hands, firmly planted on each side of JC's body, held him steady as he rimmed him with renewed enthusiasm.

"Fuck," JC whimpered at the intrusion, at the feel of Chris's small but hot hands on his hips. He couldn't help but push back at him this time, cursing his greedy ass and hoping *that* wouldn't make Chris laugh, either.

Chris just pushed further inside him, which wasn't far with his tongue but far enough to feel, especially when he flexed it and moved it around. It was hard to let him go when he finally withdrew, but JC did let him with the hope -- expectation almost -- that he was moving on to something else.

"Oh," JC said again, reduced to single syllables, wanting to convey to Chris that he'd be happy to return the favor whenever he wanted but just not able to make his mouth work like that right then. "Hot," he mumbled, pulling his other leg up and letting his knees slide out wider.

He felt the bed rise as Chris hopped off it, and resisted the urge to look back over his shoulder again to find out where he was going. He returned soon anyway, and JC could hear the door shut, hear the soft mew of the cat that he assumed was on the other side of it. Chris knelt on the bed again between JC's legs and leaned over to press a soft kiss to his back.

He smiled to himself, his face heating up from the attention, but more than that from the little things that Chris was doing to obviously make sure that he was enjoying this. "Thank you," he said softly, pressing his cheek to the covers again, his face and chest flat against the bed, his back arched in a smooth line.

He felt Chris shift slightly and make a soft grunting noise, then a finger was entering him, coated liberally with lubricant making its passage smooth and painless. He gasped and jerked back, forcing Chris all the way inside quicker than he'd been intending.

"You like that, huh?" said Chris, but it wasn't mocking at all, as he twisted the finger and moved it in and out slightly.

"So very much," JC mumbled, biting at the pillow under his head, letting his hips rock back and forth with Chris's movements. "There's a reason I don't wear underwear when I go out." He sucked in another breath as Chris twisted his finger again, making a violent shudder pass through his shoulders, and back, and hips.

"Wow, you're so fucking hot," said Chris, the first time JC had ever heard anything like that come out of his mouth. He smoothly slid another finger inside, not trying to take it slow this time as he got familiar with JC's body and what it could take, and used them to stretch him out thoroughly. "I just really, really want to be fucking you right now."

"I promised you could," JC replied, flushing more with the compliment, the attention. Wanting to be touching Chris back, but knowing it could wait until after. Then he'd do his best to make Chris feel like as much of a god as Chris had made *him* feel. "Should I ask prettily?"

"It'll probably really turn me on if you do," admitted Chris with a soft chuckle, still working his fingers inside JC's body. "And it's probably a really good thing that I'm allowed since, you know, I already went and got the condom and everything ... " He leaned down as he finger fucked him, clearly enchanted by the smooth skin of JC's lower back, kissing and licking at it again.

JC pulled away from him, taking no small effort to force Chris's fingers out of his body. But he needed to to be able to twist around, to look at Chris with big eyes that he knew were clouded with lust, wet lips that were parted from too much harsh breathing. To ask as prettily as he knew how.

"Please, Chris," he whispered, lowering his eyelashes, and it was only sort of teasing. "Please."

Chris shuddered and closed his eyes briefly, evidence of JC's overwhelming success at turning him on even more than he already was. He pressed a hand to JC's back again, gently pushing him down to the bed.

"Okay," he said breathily, and as JC pressed his face back into the pillow he could hear the telltale tearing of the condom wrapper, and the soft grunts that Chris made as he rolled it onto himself. "Okay, JC, yeah ... "

JC smiled to himself, shifting his hips in what he hoped was a fetching way, bracing for the much-anticipated intrusion from Chris's body. He felt like screaming he wanted it so much; hoped it could last long, wondered what Chris would do when he came just from being fucked like he *knew* he would.

Chris entered him slowly, which JC had to figure was as much for his own control as for JC's comfort. Not that he was able to figure much at all, not with Chris pressing inside him, large and hot and so, so confident in the way he moved, his hands tightly clutching at JC's hips again.

When he was finally all the way inside they both paused for a moment, heaving in gasps of air even though the exertion has been nothing yet compared to what JC suspected it would be shortly.

"Oh, oh, God," JC exhaled slowly, thinking that this had been too long in coming: both having sex again, finally, and reaching some sort of climax with Chris, finally. He didn't know which was more of a relief. "You feel ... oh. Perfect."

"Yeah," agreed Chris without a word of argument, still not moving anything except his hands, which loosened their grip and began roaming JC's skin restlessly. "Really glad you came up for coffee ... "

When he finally did move it was to nudge himself another impossible fraction of an inch inside, then pull out just to thrust himself back in again.

JC groaned and muffled himself with the pillow, the strength going out of his arms and shoulders, his hip flexors already starting to ache from being spread so wide after so long. This was going to be dirty, he could tell already. "At least we ... kept the pretense," he grunted in response.

"Must've been some really good coffee," said Chris, thrusting again, testing JC's limits. "Cause I've never gotten *this* reaction before ... " His hands dug in where they were -- one on the back of JC's shoulder and one curled around his waist -- when he drove in a third time, harder and faster than the last two.

"Well, it wasn't the cat," JC grunted, biting his lip to keep from reacting too much to the thrust, knowing that Chris would keep going, harder, until he got one. He brought one of his arms up alongside his head, then reached back to slide his hand on top of the one Chris had on his shoulder, holding it there.

"Never gotten this reaction to the cat, either," murmured Chris as he drove into him again, grunting at the force of it then growling softly afterwards when he pulled back again.

JC shivered when he heard Chris growl like that, not particualrly close to his ear, but still close enough that he could feel it through his body. One more thrust, and he'd be crying Chris's name, but he just squeezed Chris's hand until then. "You're making me sound easy," he mumbled.

"Not easy, just good," said Chris, gasping when he thrust into him this time as hard as he dared, rolling his hips and going in as deeply as was physically possible. "Just *really* good."

"Fuck ... Chris!" JC blurted, feeling that one in his bones, every muscle in his body stretching to let Chris in. He hadn't even *done* anything to deserve that praise, but he was pleased regardless.

His gasps started sounding more wrenched, even to his own ears, as Chris thrust again.

It was impossible for Chris to do anything but drive into JC now, over and over, shifting his hip and his position often so he wasn't entirely predictable. But mostly he just thrust desperately, his soft cries and gasps mingling with JC's own.

Finally, JC pushed himself up on his hands so he could buck back against him, Chris's hips meeting his ass with the force of both their movements, making him practically wail with the rough pleasure of it. The spot of wetness his cock had left on his own belly when it had been trapped against the bed was tingly on the soft hairs; he could feel more leaking down his shaft.

"JC," moaned Chris, drawing out the syllables as long as he could, curling an arm around JC's waist for leverage as they fucked the hell out of each other. Either his palm was sweaty or JC's back was, because when he pressed his hand against flat against his shoulder it slid slowly downward, leaving hot fingertrails in its wake.

"Can I?" JC bit out, only partly wanting permission to let go; more wanting to know how close Chris was. He wouldn't be able to handle having him continue to pound away like that, he didn't think, after he came -- not without coming again. Which he wanted to save for what they might do next.

"Yes!" Chris all but cried out, leaning forward to bite gently at JC's back. It made his thrusts shallower, but it also angled them just right. He didn't say anything else as he kept thrusting from that position, panting and licking at the bitemark.

JC whimpered, clutching at the covers desperately as his orgasm exploded from him. It hadn't taken anything more than Chris's words, but that position -- he'd shifted into it so naturally, assuredly -- made it impossible not to. He breathed Chris's name with each pulse of his cock, spurting all over the sheets he held so tightly.

Chris seemed to let himself go as soon as JC came, and JC realized he must have been straining to hold it as long as he had. He thrust inside so far and so hard he actually shifted JC's whole body further up the bed then bit him again as he came, moaning incoherent syllables into JC's back.

JC let his arms give out, collapsing on the bed and letting Chris collapse with him, both of them almost hyperventilating with too-heavy breathing. "Fuck," he said, when he could say anything, his shoulderblade stinging where Chris had bitten him. "So much for clean sheets."

Chris didn't even answer, panting heavily for a few moments then gently pulling out and rolling over for a moment to toss the condom away. He kissed the back of JC's neck tenderly before turning him forward so he could kiss his lips again.

"Fuck the sheets," he said, his grin reappearing. "We need to get you cleaned up." Before JC could ask what he meant, he slithered down the bed and began lapping carefully at his groin.

JC practically squeaked when he felt Chris's tongue on his over-sensitive cock, but didn't make any move to push him away. Just squirmed around in the wet spot and reached for the back of Chris's neck, something to hold on to. "God," he said again, fascinated by Chris's resiliency, pleased that all that energy translated to sexual pursuits.

Chris was licking his lips when he moved back up the bed, JC's groin and stomach coated with saliva now, but notably less sticky than a couple minutes earlier.

"I liked that," he said with a grin, and still projected a sense of innocence even though he was dripping sexuality.

"Which part," JC muttered, flopping back on the bed, an arm draped over his face. He felt good and used and just needed a quick minute to recover before he took the time to explore Chris's body. He'd barely even *seen* it yet.

"What part?" repeated Chris, as he wrapped his body comfortably around JC. "There were no parts. It was all one big ball of sexy fun." He licked at JC's neck playfully, practically writhing against him.

"Two minutes, just two minutes," JC protested, pushing at him weakly, but he was giggling. "You pull sexy off really well, by the way."

Chris laughed and tried to still himself, but JC could still feel him slithering beside and on top of him a little. "I *really* liked that," he repeated, pushing himself up on one elbow so they could face each other. "Can we, um, do that again, sometimes?"

"Like I said, two minutes," JC winked at him. And he wasn't kidding either; he could go again, if they did it before his body actually realized what he'd just put it through for the first time in a long while. "I liked it too," he whispered, leaning up for a kiss.

Chris kissed him easily, without hesitation. "You wanna be my boyfriend," he said, with the same innocent charm as he'd asked JC to date him, and then have sex wtih him. "So we can do this a lot?" His grin was anything but innocent, though -- it held hints of lust, humour and hope, too.

"You don't even ... " JC started, then shook his head and smiled. "Yeah. Yeah, I'd like that, I think. I won't even make you choose between me and the cat." He'd been about to protest that Chris didn't even know him that well, but then he remembered what he'd said earlier -- he knew him well enough to know he wanted to know him better.

"I'll keep the bedroom Rocky-free," promised Chris, snaking his ankle between JC's. "And I'll always have coffee for you. Always have coffee anyway ... I'm sure you're as intimately familiar with the all-nighter as I am." He coughed politely, and JC caught him in his first moment of mild embarassment. "You know what I mean."

"Do I?" JC raised an eyebrow, and wrapped a forearm around the back of Chris's neck. "Come here, come here," he murmured softly, helping Chris tangle their legs together. "I want to kiss you, lick you ... see you. I couldn't see you, Chris." He smiled and nipped at Chris's ear. "I want to know what I'm signing up for, here."

"I'm not gonna stop you." Chris licked at JC's neck, then at JC's lips when he managed to kiss him again. "You don't already know by know what you're signing up for?" He looked at JC seriously for a moment, just far enough away to see him, still close enough for JC to feel him breathing. "I think you knew before we came up here. I hope you did."

"You had me turned inside-out and upside-down," JC protested gently, biting at Chris's throat. "I didn't know *anything*, except that I wanted to know you. And you were being all Mr. Mysterious, so ... " He kissed him again. "I want what I've seen so far, I know that too."

"See?" said Chris with a smile, tumbling over so that JC was halfway on top of him. "You already know all about me."

"I *don't*," JC laughed, squirming up on top of Chris's body. "And what's that supposed to mean, anyway? To know you is to love you, or something?" He laughed again and licked over the bite mark he'd left. "I can believe that, I guess."

"It means I'm goofy and unpredictable and mysterious," said Chris, wrapping a leg around him. "Those are my fundamental characteristics. So I wasn't a *complete* mystery to you when you came up here, obviously." He wriggled beneath him and chased down JC's lips again.

JC smiled against Chris's mouth, feeling his body responding quickly to the kiss. Slipping down his body, he laughed again when Chris tried halfheartedly to keep him in place; nuzzling against his chest, taking the time to lap at one of his dark nipples. Watching Chris's expression under his eyelashes the whole time.

Chris had let the grin slip from his face, replaced with a slack mouth and half-closed eyes as JC began to pay close attention to his body. He was still restless though, his hands moving over JC's head and shoulders, his hips wriggling and his head moving slowly from side to side. JC wasn't sure if he ever kept completely still.

"Shh," JC whispered soothingly, taking that nipple between his teeth and tugging gently, running a calming hand down the side of Chris's body. "You're really hot, Chris," he said unabashedly. "Mysterious or not. I've never been with anyone like you."

"I'll take that as a compliment," Chris hissed out, arching his back toward him. "Um ... really sensitive there. Is nice." Every word came out hissed gently from between clenched teeth as Chris obviously tried to stifle whatever other noises were threatening to come out. Which JC didn't think was necessary at all.

He tugged a little harder on the nipple, not exactly *ignoring* Chris's protest that he was sensitive there, but maybe testing his boundaries a little. Seeing if he could get some real noise from him. "It *was* a compliment," he breathed. "The other guys have been ... boring."

Chris's mouth fell open and he let out a noise that was half grunt and half breathy cry. "Well, it's never been said about me that I was boring," he gasped out. "Um ... did I mention I was sensitive there?"

JC licked at it soothingly, then nipped again abruptly. "What's that?" he teased. "I must not have heard you. I'm a little busy down here." He would've stopped if Chris seemed to be in pain, but he thought he was enjoying it just fine.

Chris let out another odd, harsh sound, then laughed softly. "Yeah, okay," he said, squirming again but very obviously not trying to get away. "I'll just let you do your thing, then. Not another peep out of me." Which JC highly, highly doubted.

JC dipped his chin, and trailed his tongue down the ridge between Chris's pecs, halfway to his belly button, leaving his nipples alone for the time being. Chris was just *hot* -- like, temperature hot. And the way his muscles jerked under JC's ministrations made him smile. "But I like my boys noisy when they fuck me," he mumbled, dragging his tongue back up.

"Wasn't I noisy enough for you?" teased Chris breathlessly, that resolve broken already. His hands were still restless on JC's body and didn't even seem to have any particular aim, just touched and caressed and stroked everything they could reach. "I'll have to try harder, huh?"

JC grinned and snaked a hand down between their bodies to Chris's erection. "I don't think ... not harder, no," JC pretended to ponder. He gave him a soft squeeze right as he bit at Chris's nipple -- the other one this time. Feeling Chris ready again made him very, very ready himself.

"If it's not harder now, it will be soon," groaned Chris, visibly trying to to push up against him. "Damn, JC ... just damn." The movements of his hands were shakier now and JC could finally really see the effect he was having on him.

"I'm not sure if I could handle you harder," JC amended, stroking him softly, licking at his nipple one last time. "Tell me where the condoms are, babe," he whispered, slapping Chris's hip gently.

"Bathroom," said Chris with a soft moan. "Cabinet. Sorry ... didn't know we'd be needing more than the one." He licked his lips and opened his eyes all the way again. When he looked at JC they were dark with lust but hadn't lost their sparkle. "Not that I'm complaining."

"We'll always need more than the one," JC promised, *not* letting himself blush at that. He slid off the bed, leaving his hands on Chris til the very last second, and back toward the door. "Don't you let that cat in."

"Wouldn't dream of it," said Chris, letting his eyes drift shut and running a hand down his own body now that JC's wasn't within reach. "Don't be long, okay? I'm ... waiting."

JC wouldn't dream of taking long, not with Chris stretched out so fetchingly on the bed. He found the bathroom easily enough, and only had to shoo Rocky away twice with his foot to get there. The condoms weren't quite as easy to find, buried behind enough stuff in the cabinet that JC had to wonder how often Chris really did do this. But he was good and didn't look at the labels of the prescription bottles.

"Hey," he said softly when he re-entered the bedroom, shutting the door behind himself. "Still ready for this?"

"Was there any doubt?" asked Chris, opening his eyes back up and smirking at him. "You were gone too long. I almost had to start without you."

"Maybe if you didn't hide the condoms," JC replied as he walked over, then went on in hopefully in his huskiest voice as he sat gently next to him on the bed. "You can't do what you're going to do to me by yourself."

"Probably not," admitted Chris with a solemn nod. "And if I tried I'd probably sprain something. But I resent the implication that I hid the condoms ... they were right there in plain sight behind all that other stuff."

"At least you don't have them overflowing out of drawers, like some people I know and live with," JC smiled, reaching out for Chris's nipple again, wanting to start back up where they'd stopped. "And it's a good thing you don't have to be alone, then, isn't it."

Chris gasped again sharply, his back arching almost immediately. "Well, some people you know and live with probably go through more condoms than the average fraternity," he noted. "I'm afraid my meagre apartment hasn't seen quite that much action."

"Pity," JC breathed, stretching his body out along the top of Chris's, his cock fully hard again and pressing into Chris's thigh. "But it's not like you seem out of practice," he bantered.

"I'm gonna take that as a compliment, too," said Chris, still unable to keep still beneath him. "But hey, keeping up with your roommate gives us a lofty goal to aspire to." His arms came around JC possessively. "And we seem to be getting a good start."

"Joey ... has no stamina," JC exhaled, shivering when he felt Chris's erection rub against his own when Chris embraced him. "I have no doubt we can take him. You just ... have to stay over, sometime." JC only stumbled because it was the first time in *years* he'd ever invited someone to his place for that ... he always went elsewhere.

"As long as we don't end up in a screaming contest with him," said Chris, moving his hands slowly down JC's back. "Or ... maybe if we do, actually. Guess that means we'll have to get lots of practice in, huh." He grinned up at him impishly and licked his lips again.

"Guess so," JC agreed, ducking his head to lick delicately at Chris's tongue when it peeked out of his mouth again. "Which makes me wonder why you aren't fucking me, already ... " He spread his legs, letting them drop over Chris's, hoping that felt inviting.

"So much for foreplay," murmured Chris, his fingers curving around JC's ass and hitching him up a little higher. "Damn, JC. You, um, wanna take care of that pesky condom thing for me? Because it would be so, so hot if you were riding me right now ... "

JC grunted and fought with Chris, a little; trying to pull away just enough to be able to tear the condom open and get a hand between them to put it on him. It definitely *would* be hot, to be riding him ... he was loosened enough to make it easier, turned on enough to take how deep Chris would go. "You want it?" he asked throatily, rolling the condom on with agonizing slowness.

"Yeah," groaned Chris, stiff and all but twitching in JC's hands. "This is taking forEVER." His hips twisted slightly, but not enough to force JC to stop, which he was sure Chris was being very careful not to do. "Need you. Want you. See what you do to me? Words of one syllable. No complete sentences. My advisor will have fits."

"Yeah, but I like it," JC breathed, leaning over to lick at Chris's neck. "And your advisor isn't here, honey." He sat back on his haunches, holding Chris's cock away from his body, steady so that once Chris asked for it, he could simply sit up and slide down along it.

Chris's breathing quickened and became shallower as he watched what JC was doing, his eyes following every move. One hand curled around JC's thigh now and the other tentatively stroked the length of JC's erection. "Want you," he repeated softly.

"Want *you*," JC replied breathily, his eyes locked with Chris's. "Oh ... shit, Chris, I do." He struggled to get his legs under him, kneeling, stretching over Chris's hips and trying less-than-smoothly to guide him into his body.

Chris moved his hands to try and help him, but was almost too overwhelmed by the sensation to do much of anything. "Good thing I waited for you then," joked Chris between desperate pants. "For so very many reasons."

JC hissed as Chris's cock breached his body at first; then it got easier as he inched down his length. "Right now?" he tried to clarify, struggling to get the words out. "Or ... in general?"

Chris seemed very startled that he'd asked the question and just stared for a moment as JC sank further onto his body. "Both," he said, almost too soft to hear. Then suddenly whatever had captured him was broken and he grinned at him again, his hands moving away to JC's thighs again. "You're way too amazing to be real."

JC was fairly certain that was the most amazing compliment he'd ever received, and mostly because Chris didn't seem like he ever lied. Or exaggerated. Or put on some sort of disguise, or anything like that. He froze on Chris's hips for a moment, then started moving in lazy circles, threading his fingers through Chris's and pulling their hands up to rest against his chest. "Say that again."

"Which part?" asked Chris, for once almost relaxing and letting JC do the work. But there was still an eager tension that made his body almost quiver. "The part where I said you're way too amazing to be real, or the part where I said I'm very glad I waited for you?"

"Oh," JC closed his eyes, holding Chris's hands to his body, their hips the only source of movement. "Chris. That ... either. Or, um. Both." He rocked a little harder. "God, you feel ... "

"Yeah," said Chris inarticulately, beginning to push up against him, following the rhythmic motion that JC had started. "Good. Hot. Yes. Uh huh." He grinned again, and JC wasn't sure he had really been reduced to that or if he just thought it was cute. But then Chris's eyes fluttered closed and he moaned and JC realized he'd just watched him lose the power of speech altogether.

He let go of one of his hands, smiling when Chris just kept it clasped to his chest, his fingers digging in the muscle like he was holding on for dear life. He started touching himself a little: not hard enough to bring himself off, just as almost a distraction so he would come *faster* from just looking at Chris. "You're not ... sleeping ... are you?" he breathed out when he saw him close his eyes.

Chris let out a sharp laugh then took a couple of deep breaths. "Anything but," he murmured finally, his fingers starting to slip along JC's skin. "If I look at you again, riding me like that, looking at me like you don't wanna be anywhere but here with me ... I'm gonna come ... and you deserve better than that."

"Well," JC laughed in reply, digging in a little deeper and trying to get Chris to look at him, "Coming's a good thing, actually. I just wanna know I make you feel good." The muscles in his thighs and ass were starting to burn, and he was getting *tired*, but he didn't want to relinquish his position, either.

Chris forced his eyes open and looked at JC with an intensity that JC hadn't even known he was capable of. "Good," he said, quite seriously, "is *not* an adequate word." Each syllable was forced out with some effort as his hips still rose to meet each of JC's accellerating motions,

"No?" JC bit out, riding him a little harder, leaning back until he had to brace himself with his hand on Chris's knee. "How does it make you feel, then?"

"Better than good," said Chris, thrusting up into him. "Way better than good. Don't ... make me think, right now." He closed his eyes again, but propped himself up on one arm so he could thrust better. Harder. There was no mistaking that for relaxing this time.

JC started grunting as Chris pushed into him harder. Their fucking both times had been ... not vicious, but just *hard*. Like they both knew what they were doing, and what it would take to get each other off well. They could say sweet things, even during the sex, but they didn't treat each other like girls.

He squeezed Chris's knee and leaned back even more, gasping as the angle stretched him tightly, jerking himself a little rougher. "Shit, honey," he murmured, reduced to mumbles himself.

Still bracing himself on one arm, Chris reached out to touch JC with the other, nudging JC's hand out of the way so he could take over stroking him. He used a counterrhythm to the one they were fucking with, so that JC didn't know when he could breathe and when he was going to feel another sharp jolt of arousal rush through him.

It was the first time he could remember not really having *any* warning before he could tell he was seconds away from coming -- usually he built up so much longer than that. He thrust into Chris's hand, bucking down on his cock as he did, biting out Chris's name. "Chris, oh God, hon, please. You're going ... making me ... "

"Good," said Chris, his voice just as harsh and needy. "Trying to. Go ahead, JC ... " He didn't have to tell JC to come; he heard the word as clear as if Chris had actually said it aloud. "Next time ... next time we'll take it slow ... "

"Fuck *that*," JC bit out, but he was smiling, and then shuddered when he couldn't hold out any more. Just the *idea* of Chris fucking him slow almost broke his brain. If he could've spoken he would have teased Chris that he couldn't do it. As it was, it took all his energy not to fall backward she he began coming in spurts in the air between them.

Chris's face showed visible relief when JC came, opening his eyes again and smiling at him. "So hard to wait for you," he murmured right before he came, driving himself up as far and as hard as he could when he did, JC's body already squeezing him tightly. "Ready to come just about the moment you look at me ... " he added breathlessly, his eyes locking with JC's.

"I like sex," JC explained blandly, remembering that it seemed like Chris *had* had to wait for him last time too, and feeling slightly bad about that. But even more than that, overwhelmed with the easy way Chris kept complimenting him. He seemed so confident, so in-control and devil-may-care, that to know he had *any* effect on him ... was beyond flattering. "Sex with you, I could get attached to."

"I think I'm already attached to you," joked Chris, wiggling his hips a little, still inside him. But there was a deeper meaning there, too; JC could see it in Chris's face, in the way he still kept their eyes locked even as he teased.

"You kill me," JC muttered, and there was deeper meaning there too. He was falling, hard, SO hard, because finally here was a boy that could fuck him like a man and still stroke his ego like a boy and he wanted Chris to know it without having to tell him. Leaning over, not letting Chris slip out of him just yet, he placed the gentlest kiss on his lips.

Chris exhaled softly against his lips as JC began to pull away. "You're staying, right?" he said, still trying to keep hold of JC's eyes though they were so, so close now. "That's the message you left, that you're staying?"

"What?" JC asked, taking a second to even process what Chris was asking, too captivated by his eyes. "Oh. Um. I just ... told him not to wait up. I *can* stay, if you don't mind. If you want. If the cat won't claw my eyes out...."

"He's more of a toe cat than an eye cat," said Chris, shifting slightly but still staying inside him. "But I can keep him outta here. For you."

"Is that a yes, you want me to stay?" JC tried to clarify, doing a commendable job of keeping the neediness out of his voice, he thought. It actually didn't matter, he was *used* to leaving after, and he wasn't much of a cuddler with anyone but Joey. But staying with Chris sounded ... nice.

"Well I already *asked*, didn't I?" said Chris, kissing his nose with a hopeful smile. "I'm just waiting for *you* to say yes."

"You didn't ask me to," JC explained bashfully. "You asked me if I was *going* to. There's a difference." He pushed himself up on his knees, letting Chris slide out of him finally, and rolled gently off his body. "I'd love to, if it means I can wake you up."

"Well, that depends entirely one how you're gonna wake me up," teased Chris mildly, gasping a little as JC rolled off him, his smile broad and genuine. "If it involves a bag of ice and/or pliers then you're sleeping on the couch with Rocky. Otherwise ... you're welcome in my bed any time you want to be here."

"Maybe not a *bag* of ice," JC pretended to ponder, reaching over to roll the condom off of Chris and ball it up in a tissue, then licked at him in much the same way he had done to JC earlier. He tasted dark and good and JC was fairly sure he knew how he'd be waking him up.

"I take it back," said Chris, inhaling sharply and clenching JC's hair in his fist. "It also definitely depends on what you plan to do with the ice."

"That's what I was thinking," JC smiled, stretching up to kiss Chris's lips. Somehow it seemed that as hot as they could make each other, it wasn't something that was fleeting. "Last time I'm asking -- you sure you want me to stay? I don't mind catching a cab. Still making you call, though."

"Stay," said Chris, rolling his eyes at him with a grin on his face. "You always need to be asked three times?" he asked as he wrapped a leg around him again, making sure he didn't go anywhere. "Because it didn't seem to take that much to get you in here in the first place."

JC blushed and leaned back on the pillow. "Well," he said slowly. "I guess that should tell you something. I just ... you know, never assume. I know guys want me to go *in* their bedrooms. I'm just never straight on when they want me *out*."

"You're not just a guy, you're my boyfriend, remember?" said Chris, snuggling in and doing his best to stretch out his body to cover JC's. He didn't quite make it, but it was a noble effort. "That means you have staying privileges whenever you like. I might make you buy me dinner once in a while though. Or at least, you know, make coffee."

"I already did that," JC smiled, running a hand down Chris's bare back, then pulling the sheets up over them on the upsweep. "The coffee, I mean. What do I get to make you do?" He started kissing Chris's head softly, along his hairline, on top of the wilted spikes, the arch of his eyebrow.

"You don't get to make me do anything until I get to sleep in *your* bed," protested Chris, his eyes drifting closed under JC's tender attention. "I *may* consider vacuuming. But only because it turns you on."

"You turn me on," JC whispered. And Chris did, he *definitely* did, and maybe it was just his body reacting to good sex for the first time in forever, but he was damned if he didn't want to go again.

But Chris seemed sleepy, and there was always the waking up part.

"Come over tomorrow," he breathed instead, under his ear. "After we fuck in the library."

Chris grinned, his eyes still closed, tipping his head so that JC could kiss him more easily. "You can count on it," he said softly. "I know the perfect place ... "

---

Chris turned the page gingerly with one finger and leaned over the book, his other hand coming up automatically to slide his glasses back up his nose; they had the untidy habit of slipping down every time he bent over. As much as he was engrossed in the text, his eyes kept darting up and around, expecting JC to reappear at any moment.

He glanced discreetly at his watch -- even though there wasn't a single other soul to see what he was doing this deep in the library -- and sighed heavily before focusing on the book again.

He caught JC sneaking around the carrels when he finally got there, and smiled to himself as he pretended he didn't see him. Which seemed like a very sound decision when he had JC's tongue trailing up the back of his neck, and his slender hands rubbing down the front of his chest.

"I got hard the second I got in here," he muttered, sucking on the skin below his ear without so much as a hello. "You've ruined this place for me, just talking about it."

"I'd hardly call it 'ruined'," protested Chris, and tried not to turn his head towards those lips. His eyes were on the book, but he wasn't seeing a word anymore. Very gently he closed it and set it aside, just in case. "This seems to me to be a lovely perk."

"Mmm," JC mumbled non-commitally, his lips working enough to definitely leave a mark. "At least I only have one more semester. Can't study in my place, 'cause of Joey and Justin's soundtrack, can't study in here, 'cause I got my mind on you ... "

"That's what coffeeshops are for," said Chris sagely, his head tilting forward and his glasses sliding down his nose again. He sighed and left them this time, and remembered belatedly that coffee was what had gotten them into this in the first place. "Oh. Well maybe you can study outside, then ... "

JC's hands drifted down farther as he pressed closer against Chris's back. "Or maybe you can keep me so busy I never have time to study," he exhaled, and Chris wondered fleetingly what had gotten *into* him. He nudged at the frame of Chris's glasses with his nose. "These are nice."

Chris finally turned his head and blinked at him, pushing the glasses up, a slow smile crossing his face. "I don't think we get to make fun of Joey and Justin's honeymoon stage anymore," he noted with more than a little amusement -- at both JC's state and at his own.

JC grimaced. "I'd like to think we're a little more ... cool ... than that," he sniffed, but was obviously fighting a smile. "Just 'cause we're smart enough to know that sex like that doesn't happen with everyone, and to take advantage of it while you can ... "

"You're molesting me in a library," said Chris, not feeling any need to hide his grin. "I'm afraid we're definitely *not* more cool than that. But definitely smarter." Smart enough to recognize what they'd found, he hoped, and not be stupid enough to let it go.

"Well," JC sniffed again, tugging on Chris's chair. "At least we're not cheesy. And come *on*, will you? If I'm molesting you, at least let me do it right." He yanked on the chair again, chuckling when it tipped precariously.

"I'm not stopping you," said Chris innocently, takings his glasses off now and setting them on the table, figuring he probably wasn't going to need them for the next little while. If things went well, anyway. "If you're not molesting me right, it's not *my* fault."

"What the hell?" JC laughed, and Chris thought maybe he imagined the hint of nervousness there. "You can *help*, you know. This was kinda your idea." He crouched down on the floor behind Chris and pulled on one of the legs, until he was facing him -- still seated -- and JC was on his knees in front of him with a smirk.

"Well, if you think this is somehow *wrong*," said Chris, looking down at him with a broad smile on his face, eagerly anticipating what they might do, "then I'm almost scared to see your idea of 'right'. You might break me."

"I get the feeling you're resilient," JC smiled, running his hands up the insides of Chris's thighs. "If ... you know, everything last night -- and this morning -- was an indication." He leaned in closer. "I won't hurt you."

"No, but you might blow my mind," said Chris, leaning foward as he spoke so he could lower his voice. "Not that i would mind that much. Every mind needs a good blowing, once in a while."

JC rolled his eyes but reached for the buttons on Chris's pants anyway, more readily than Chris actually expected. "Can I take back what I said about us not being cheesy?" he muttered.

"That wasn't cheesy," Chris protested, batting at JC's hand so he would pat attention to him. The buttons could wait. "That was clever. You just don't appreciate good humor." He pulled his hand back again. "Okay. You can go on with what you were doing now ... "

"What was I doing?" JC replied playfully, squeezing at Chris's knees instead of reaching for his pants. "And I appreciate *good* humor, yes." He leaned forward to kiss Chris's leg, his mouth warm and wet through his pants.

"I'm feeling unappreciated," whined Chris, feeling himself get harder and harder. He was hard even before JC got between his legs, though. He was hardish before JC even showed up. His hand fell to JC's head, toying with the long strands of hair.

"Oh, you're appreciated," JC said under his breath, his hands inching higher again as he nuzzled into Chris's palm like a large cat. "And you're very, very hot. I thought you wanted to tutor me in the ways of fucking someone's brains?"

"That would involve me reading to you while you blew me," said Chris softly, his fingers inching toward another one of the books on the table. "Assuming you're going to blow me, and I'm not going to grab you and yank you up and fuck you against the wall." And not a word of that was a joke, this time.

JC looked up abruptly, and Chris was satisfied with the surprise he saw in his face. *Pleased* surprise. "Um," he stuttered, squirming as his hands paused too, and then gripped Chris's legs tighter. "Well. Is there ... I mean. Can't we do both?"

Chris looked around but, as usual, this section of the library was deserted. Especially at this time of day. "I can if you can," he said, only half teasing. He was certainly up for more than one round, if it came down to that, which with JC he was beginning to have no doubt it would.

"God, I'm gonna come before we even get there," JC mumbled, mouthing at Chris's leg again. "You gonna keep all your clothes on, when you fuck me up against that wall?" He sounded like he wanted nothing more, and his heretofore confident fingers trembled on Chris's fly.

"Well, I'll have to remove a couple of things," admitted Chris, loving that look on JC's face, that catch in his voice. "But in the interest of - " He snickered. " -- modesty, it'll be as little as I have to to be able to fuck you. You know ... I've always wanted to say 'up against the wall' to someone ... "

"Don't make fun," JC protested, unzipping him carefully and exhaling when Chris bulged out of his pants slightly. "Just 'cause I like sex, like the way you do it ... "

"That wasn't making fun," said Chris, his hand gripping the edge of the chair just a little tighter as JC almost -- but not quite -- touched him. "That was me confessing one of my fantasies to you. Can we play with handcuffs sometime, too?"

JC's mouth curved into a slow grin. "I'm not a big fan of metal," he said, tugging Chris's fly open a little more. "But I'll tie you up." He smiled innocently. "That's what you meant, right?" he asked, ducking his head to breathe on the thin material of Chris's underwear, keeping his eyes on Chris the whole time.

"That'll ... " began Chris, forcing himself to let go of the chair and tangle his hand in JC's hair again. "That'll do nicely, yeah." The chair he was sitting in was way too hard and uncomfortable for something like this but actually ... that was part of the charm. Part of the turn-on.

"I believe you were supposed to be reading to me," JC went on, huskily. "How quickly we forget." With that, he finally *finally* reached inside, cupping Chris's erection with his palm, nudging at the hem of Chris's shirt with his slightly cold nose.

Chris reached out for the book with a shaky but determined hand; he was not going to pass up this chance. "That can be arranged," he said, slouching down in the seat and pushing himself against JC's palm. He pulled the book to him and choose one of the many bookmarks at random to open it at.

He didn't start reading right away, though; still distracted by the contact that wasn't quite direct enough, the warm heat of JC's breath that he knew wasn't enough like the warm heat of his tongue. JC was smiling, manuevering out of the way so he could hold the book over his head, trying to figure out a way not to block his view. Slowly, JC started peeling the waistband of his boxers down over the tip of his cock.

Chris wasn't entirely sure he could still read at that point, blinking a few times and closing the book. "You don't want to hear about London street life," he said, letting it drop back to the desk awkwardly. "How about poetry? 'She walks in beauty, like the night ... '."

"Tennyson?" JC guessed breathily, touching the edge of his tongue to the tip of Chris's cock. "Shelley?" He licked slowly down the length, holding the underwear out of the way. "No, I know," he muttered, sucking the whole head into his mouth. "Byron."

Chris moaned softly and brought his hand back up to cup the back of JC's head. "Byron," he agreed, wondering if trying to recite something right now was the best idea either as JC began sucking him skillfully. "She walks in beauty -- " He gasped. " -- like the night of cloudless climes and starry skies ... "

"Why are we talking about some chick," JC mumbled, his mouth loose around Chris's cock and his hands creeping up the inside of his thighs again. His eyes were bright and dancing. "You don't like what I got, honey?"

"Cause it's really rude to changing someone else's words," said Chris, his head rolling back. "Jesus, JC, don't stop just to bitch out my taste in poetry ... " He made an effort not to clench JC's hair, toying with the soft strands instead as he gripped the chair again with his other hand. "You can't change it in your head or something?"

"I'm just *saying*," JC complained, shifting his weight between Chris's legs, sucking intently and deeply for several seconds. "How hard is it to change some pronouns? I think he'd find the fact that I'm sucking you off while you recite rude enough. You could at least make *me* happy in the process."

"You're not happy already?" said Chris, still strugging to control his reactions, struggling not to fist JC's hair and thrust into his throat. "I think he might appreciate the fact that you're sucking me off while I recite, actually," he went on, giving JC a smirk he knew was shaky. " ... and all that's best of dark and bright meet in his aspect and his eyes ... "

JC grunted approvingly, his lips near the base of Chris's erection, his throat working around him gently. And if he wasn't happy, well ... he was doing a good job acting. But Chris suspected that JC enjoyed what he was doing very, very much ... especially when he saw him drop a hand to his own lap.

" ... thus mellow'd to that tender light which heaven to gaudy day denies," finished Chris in a choked voice, his fingers closing in spite of him around a fistfull of JC's hair. "Oh god," he mumbled a moment later as JC continued to suck him, tongue and throat both massaging his erection. "Oh ... god ... " It was so hard to keep his voice down and not let on what they were doing. So hard.

JC moaned again, not pulling away at all when Chris tugged on his hair, and Chris felt the vibrations down to his toes. The hand he was using to hold Chris's underwear was digging into Chris's hip; Chris could just barely feel the slow, rhythmic movement of his other arm.

"Do you want me to come?" he asked breathily, letting his head roll back again. It was taking too much effort to try and keep it upright, too much concentration that would better be focused on the sparking pleasure in his groin and even thighs. "Because I can ... any time ... "

He heard JC snort, and then just take him deeper into his mouth, lips closing almost at the base of his cock. A thumb appeared out of nowhere to massage his balls gently through his pants, and Chris figured that he couldn't have had a better invitation if it was engraved.

"O-okay," he moaned, and did, finally releasing the tight control he'd had over his own body's reactions and let JC's mouth and throat bring him quickly to orgasm. He couldn't help clenching JC's hair just a little bit tighter, and in the back of his mind he hoped he wasn't hurting him.

JC swallowed easily almost, stroking his hip and thigh as he came down, letting him slide from his mouth gently. Punctuating the attention he'd lavished on him with a soft kiss to his belly, and tugging his underwear back in place. "Fairly effective poetry lesson," he murmured, his voice husky.

Chris had to take a few more deep breaths before he could lift his head and give JC a grin. "There are more stanzas," he admitted, very gently adjusting himself, he was still so sensitive. "But when I'm with you I seem to have the stamina of a sixteen-year-old virgin. Hope you won't hold that against me."

"I have absolutely no complaints about your stamina," JC said softly, resting his chin on Chris's knee, looking up at him with wide, bright eyes. "Or any other aspect of your sexual ... prowess." He blushed. "Unless you bail on, um. Fucking me against the wall."

"Can I have a few minutes on that?" he asked, thinking that if JC kept looking at him like that it wouldn't even be that long before he was ready to go again. "Up," he added softly, tugging on JC's arm and hoping for a kiss from him.

JC squeezed closer between his legs and raised his face for a kiss. He was warm and his already-lush lips looked absolutely bruised from what he'd just done, at it struck Chris just how fucking *gorgeous* he was.

"I didn't mean right now," JC whispered, his eyes closed. "I'm still basking, even if you aren't."

"Who says I'm not basking?" said Chris against his lips. "Is it so bad that I like to kiss a little while I bask?" And the kissing wasn't exactly hindering his recovery time either, as JC would be sure to notice shortly.

"I have absolutely no complaints about that either," JC assured him, pressing up close between his thighs, letting his hands drift a little more eagerly over his pants as they kissed. "I was just trying to explain why I wasn't asking for it right then." He bit his lip. "Not that you're gonna let me tell you when to do it either, I expect."

"Probably not," admitted Chris, finally letting go of his hair entirely and cupping his hand around the back of JC's neck. His skin was so warm as Chris ran his thumb over it gently. "But I do take suggestions, from time to time ... "

"Far be it for me to imply that you need hints," JC sighed, tipping his head forward from the slight slight pressure Chris put on his neck. "I figure you already know how bad I want it ... and there was that thing about not taking your clothes off ... "

"Right, the modesty," teased Chris, knowing how fucking hot it was going to be, and how once again JC was gonna be left thinking he was a quick trigger or something. "Actually, I'm busy picking out the wall as we speak. Don't want something that's gonna rock or peel, after all."

"Peel?" JC swallowed, cocking his head and looking a little nervous. "Um. Okay. You, uh ... need help with that?" His fingers danced along Chris's thighs some more, and he squirmed as he shifted his legs beneath him.

"The paint," clarified Chris, stroking JC's upper back. "You've seen the walls in this place. I'm sure you don't want to walk out of her with paint flakes all over the front of your shirt ... or do you?" He gave JC a quirky grin, wondering if maybe that wasn't part of the plan, once he thought about it.

"No, no," JC shook his head quickly, glancing around the room. "No ... that's okay." He peered up at Chris again, and gave him a hesitant smile. "We're in the library," he whispered, like he couldn't quite believe it, and it was cute to see the normally so-cool JC a little flustered.

"We're in a distant, back, forgotten corner of the library," said Chris, smiling back, a little nervous himself but trying not to show it. Not *too* much, anyway. "The only people who come here are people like us who either won't notice what we're doing, won't care, or will just discreetly watch." Not that he believed the last one would happen. He didn't think there would be anyone by at all, or he wouldn't be doing this in the first place. But there was always taht chance.

"Watch?" JC echoed, blushing again. "We should give them a good show, then. And you're going to have to keep me quiet, I think. I'm already about to explode, here." As if to punctuate the point, he rubbed a hand over his own crotch briskly and groaned at the contact.

"Stop that," said Chris quickly, feeling a jolt of arousal at the sight. "I want you to come while I'm fucking you. You ... seem to like that." He wasn't even teasing when he said that; it was something JC definitely seemed to enjoy and something he didn't mind giving him, whenever and wherever he wanted. "I can't do an encore of the poetry while we're up against the wall, though. My mind tends to get too focused when I fuck."

"On what?" JC blurted, putting his hands back on Chris's legs as soon as he told him to stop, then blushing again. "I mean ... like, on the other person? Or on what you're doing." He didn't respond to what Chris said about him coming from being fucked, and Chris had to hope he *realized* he wasn't making fun, or trying to embarrass him.

"On the other person," Chris confirmed, mind drifting a little as he thought about it. As it often did. "On how they're feeling and what they're doing and those little sounds that you're making that you don't even seem to really know about ... " His voice trailed off as the vision of JC being fucked on his bed the previous night came vividly to mind.

"Chris," JC whispered a little wantonly, bracing his hands on Chris's legs and pulling himself up to kiss him again. "Chris ... please." He groped in his lap a little, more desperately than he'd done anything in the library just yet, and Chris smiled when his hand came in contact with what he must've been feeling around for. "Please ... can ... are you ... ?"

Chris just kissed him back, letting it get harder and deeper as it went on and on. He didn't want to have to answer questions now that he could feel the need burning through his body again. He just wanted to grab JC and press him against the wall next to them and lick him all over, then fuck him so well that he couldn't help crying out when he came, library be damned.

"Ready for you?" he said finally, gripping JC's neck firmly, their lips still close. "Hell yeah."

JC whimpered against his mouth, trying weakly to push back against the hand on his neck. "Remember," he panted, once he wrenched his mouth away, his hands still massaging the bulge at Chris's groin. "Leave your clothes on."

"That's not the kind of thing a guy forgets," said Chris, pushing back against him and feeling the familiar sensations begin to build. "I am allowed do undo my pants and take it out, though, right?" he teased. "I'm allowed to push my pants down just far enough that I can thrust it inside you, again and again and again. That's in these rules, isn't it?"

"I'm not making the rules," murmured JC again, exhaling shakily, one hand moving faster as he dropped the other back to his own erection again. "That was just a ... what did you call it? Suggestion."

"Suggestion noted," said Chris, fisting one hand in JC's shirt and tugging him higher so he could lean back in the chair again for a moment. "I don't suppose you brought any condoms," he said, trying not to look like he was teasing and genuinely wondering if that had even occurred to him. "I'd hate to have to postpone this now ... " JC's face fell. "No, I ... really didn't think we'd be doing *this*," he explained apologetically, trying harder to pull away as the implications occured to him. "Fuck, I'm ... fuck. No." He closed his eyes, jaw set. "Sorry," he muttered, sighing pitifully.

Chris felt bad as soon as he saw the disappointment in JC's face. "No, no, sorry," he said, trying to pull him back. "I was teasing, JC, I'm sorry. I have ... I mean, I brought something. Just in case. To kinda make up for being a little unprepared last night and all." He gave JC a smile and hoped that it would be returned.

"Oh!" JC exclaimed, his own grin reappearing breifly before he pretended to get mad. "Don't *do* that, don't play me like that," he complained, slapping at Chris's chest but letting himself be pulled almost up onto Chris's lap anyway. "That was mean."

"I'm sorry," said Chris again, but with a relieved smile this time, nipping gently at JC's lips as he pulled him closer. "Honest. Can we have sex now?" It wasn't a real question, and he knew JC knew it, but he also knew he looked awfully cute while asking it.

"I'm never, ever going anywhere with you without one, ever again," JC vowed, blinking at him, getting his feet underneath him unsteadily. He laughed softly. "God, I'll still all scared that you aren't going to do it."

"Scared?" repeated Chris, reaching down to just brush his fingers against JC's erection. He was so ready there was already a tiny wet patch on the front of his pants. "Don't be. I always follow through." And with that he abruptly got to his feet and looked from side to side, not wanting to wait anymore.

JC watched him mutely, backing up a little and crossing and uncrossing his arms before reaching down and fumbling at the buttons on his own pants. "Where do you want me?" he said eventually, when Chris didn't say anything. "How do you want me?"

Chris looked him up and down, his pulse racing, then grabbed his shirt again. "Over here," he said, firmly but not roughly. JC wanted to be told how to do it, this time, and he was happy to oblige. He pushed on JC's back, forcing his front to the cold, cement wall. "Like this, I think," he mused, reaching around JC's body to take care of his pants. As much as they needed to, anway.

Chris grinned when JC arched his back, tilting his ass up -- too high for Chris to do anything about like that, but he'd fix that soon enough. JC had raised his hands to grip the wall on either side of his head, and his shoulders rose and fell visibly as his breathing quickened, and Chris knew he didn't even have to hold him there. "Like this?" JC repeated, trying to look back.

Chris just yanked his pants and underwear down in response, leaving them at about mid thigh, low enough so that JC would be able to spread his legs as far as he needed to, high enough that they stayed on. He gave JC's ass an appreciative pat before working on his own pants, undoing them and pulling himself out rather than pulling them down, the way JC liked it.

Out of his pocket he pulled a condom and a sample packet of hand cream that he'd gotten out of one of his sister's fashion magazines. It was the only thing he had hanging around that was this portable and would work as lubricant in a pinch. He gazed over JC's body, watching it move desperately with each breath, and knew that he didn't even have time to tease.

"Yeah," he mumbled, finally letting JC know he was still there, and reached out to caress his ass again with wandering, curious fingers that dipped into the crack at every opportunity. "Yeah, like this ... "

"You're doing it again," JC moaned, pushing himself up closer against the wall without any encouragement from Chris, spreading his legs a little wider. He shivered as Chris's fingers brushed lower and lower and whimpered, then turned his head to rest his cheek against the cool surface. "Teasing. And you don't have to, you know?" he mumbled. "I know I'm a slut for you already."

"I'm not teasing," protested Chris, letting his fingers trail back up again, and then away so that he could get himself ready. "One day I'm really gonna show you teasing. This is just ... taking a little time to make sure I don't come all over your back." He slipped the condom on, dropping the package to the floor, and smeared himself with the cool hand cream. "Can I go into you cold?" he asked, leaning forward to kiss JC's shoulder tenderly, "Or to you need me to use fingers in you first?"

JC shuddered. "No, you can," he breathed. "Whatever. You have stuff?" he asked, nodding when Chris grunted affirmatively. "Then yeah, whatever. Whatever it takes to get you in me, *please*, Chris ... " He let his head drop audibly back against the wall, and struggled to spread his legs wider still.

Chris felt for JC's barely-exposed hole with a somewhat slick finger, then very slowly guided himself inside. It was so fucking tight, doing it like this, but neither of them wanted to wait. "JC," he said, gasping out the name as he pushed himself gradually inside him, pushing up with his feet and bracing himself with one arm against the wall. The other he wrapped tenderly around JC's body.

"Oh god, oh god," JC gasped, grunting as Chris moved further and further up inside him, twitching in his arm. "God, you're ... fucking big, Chris, and ... hot ... " He moaned again, and if Chris didn't know perfectly better, he'd think JC was actually trying to squirm *away* from him as he entered him.

Chris's arm around JC's body kept him still enough that he made it all the way inside him, exhaling softly against his back once he was finally in. "Fuck," he said aloud, pressing his forehead to the back of JC's shoulder. "Just ... fuck."

Chris knew JC had to feel his pants chafing against the skin of his ass, but he didn't complain, or do anything but start to rock back against Chris suddenly, pushing away from the wall with both hands. "You can," JC pleaded as he wiggled against him. "God, Chris, please just *move*."

"Hang on," said Chris desperately, catching his breath and regaining control of himself so he *could* begin thrusting into him. It wasn't an easy angle and his legs were going to burn, after, but it was so worth it to feel this. He took a swift look back over his shoulder, then pulled out just far enough to give JC a hard thrust when he went back inside.

JC collapsed back against the wall, grunting so loudly Chris thought for a second he'd actually hurt him. Before he saw the huge smile on his face and felt him shift his legs further apart again. "Chris," he moaned, that sound a little louder than Chris would've liked, too. "Shit, you make me feel good ... you're so good ... "

"Shhhh," he said gently, pulling out and thrusting back in again with a soft grunt of his own. "Yeah ... ditto ... " He closed his eyes and kissed JC's shoulder again, the arm around JC's waist squeezing him closer. "This is so good." It was so quiet around them that every noise they made seemed to echo between the stacks.

"*You* 'shhh'," JC pouted, bucking back against him harder, pushing farther away from the wall and tilting his head down. "I like this." He was panting heavily, rolling his hips every time Chris withdrew a little, definitely fucking Chris back rather than just letting himself be fucked.

"Fuck," Chris exhaled again, pushing back against him and driving further inside. He groped for JC's erection and found it solid and damp, the tip already slick again as he ran his thumb gently over it. "Me too."

(question: what cell phone service providers do you have in Canada? I'm trying to find a plan that'll let me do international calling and I don't know where to start looking)

JC let him push him again, until his chest was back against the wall, his back still arched to keep Chris at that angle that had both of them groaning when Chris filled him. He hissed as Chris's fingers teased at him, torn between lunging forward and bucking back. "No, okay," he grunted. "Love it. I LOVE it."

"You just like doing it to the smell of musty books," teased Chris as he let his teeth sink into JC's back, just a little, and pushed up with his hips so that he moved a fraction of an inch further inside him. "Not that I blame you." He grunted as he tried to hold himself there as long as possible, as long as it took for JC to push back again.

"LOVE doing it ... to the smell of musty books," JC corrected, laughing breathlessly, then clamping down on Chris's cock deep within him when he bit him again. "You want me to scream? Better not do that."

Chris gasped. "Speaking of screaming ... " he managed to get out, finally withdrawing just to drive back into JC's body again. "That's gonna be me, soon." He licked at JC's back instead of biting, needing to do something with his mouth and unable to reach JC's to kiss him breathless.

"Fuck," JC shuddered one last time, then started coming in Chris's fist, hard and fast. His whole body seemed to spasm with it, and his knees started giving out, almost pulling Chris down with him.

"No, hang on," said Chris, all but propping JC up with his arm as he drove himself into JC's pliant body a couple more times, desperate to get off. The feel of JC coming on him shot him right to the edge, like it always seemed to. "Oh God, JC ... " he mumbled as he came, sucking at the warm flesh of JC's back and leaving a bright red mark in his wake.

He couldn't hold him up after that, not without some help from JC, and watched a little helplessly as JC slumped to his knees and banged his head against the wall. "Ow," he mumbled. "Shit."

Chris pulled away, cleaning himself up as swiftly as he could and tucking himself away before dropping to the floor with him and turning JC toward him, kissing his forehead. "I think that was the hottest sex I've ever had," he confessed, then chuckled softly and kissed him again.

"Well," JC mumbled, closing his eyes and leaning his head back against the wall. "Now we have something to strive for everytime you fuck me from here on out. We'll have to practice. A *lot*."

"I have no problem with that," said Chris, kissing at his ear, then at his neck. "And I'm willing to get started any time. But right now ... " He tugged at JC's arm, trying to get him to his feet again. "We need to get you dressed again." Before he could do anything, though, he looked JC up and down and felt a hot flush go through him. "You're so hot. Jesus."

"No, you," whispered JC again, keeping his eyes squeezed shut, and looking like he wasn't about to get up. "Jesus, Chris. You're fucking ruining me, here." He let his legs stretch out in front of him, on either side of Chris's body. "I promise, I wasn't pathetic before I met you."

"And you aren't pathetic now," said Chris, caressing his cheek with one hand, feeling the flush as much as he could see it. "Either that or we're both incredibly pathetic. Which is entirely possible, actually ... but let's not dwell on that." He tugged at JC's arm again, but only halfheartedly. "At least put your pants on? Not that I don't love looking at you like this ... "

"They're on," JC replied, gesturing vaguely at the lower half of his body. "Just ... not all the way." He smiled, and Chris wasn't sure he'd ever seen a sweeter grin. He just wanted him to open his eyes and *look* at him already.

Chris leaned in and kissed him softly, tugging at JC's pants at the same time. "I'll leave you here like this," he threatened teasingly. "You just watch me, I will ... "

"Okay, see ya," JC yawned, still grinning. But somehow he could tell well enough where Chris was when he pulled back, even without seeing him, because he grabbed his neck and tugged him close again. "You'd come back, wouldn't you?" he asked quietly, kissing *him* this time.

"I wouldn't have made it more than a couple feet away," he chuckled softly. "You've got this magnetic thing going on. Just draws me in, like a little rod of iron or something." He reached down and tried to tuck JC in at least, getting his boxers halfway up. "And speaking of little rods of iron ... "

"Oh, stop!" JC laughed, finally opening his eyes and laughing again. "I have to draw the line at awful ... pet-name things, or whatever that was." He smiled and held his arms out to Chris. "I'll get dressed in a sec. Just c'mere and tell me you liked it, again."

"I liked it," said Chris, practically crawling over him to kiss him. "I like it so much I might just do it to you again, right here ... right now ... " He sighed and got up, though. "But unfortunately, I think we've already pushed our luck. My place again tonight, or are we really gonna do yours?"

JC's face fell, again, just like when he'd teased him about the condoms. "But," he said. "I thought ... I mean. I invited you, and I don't ... " He closed his eyes. "Whichever."

Chris kissed him softly again. "JC?" he said, his voice as gentle as JC had ever heard it. "I want to come over. I really do. Okay?"

"I kinda ... picked up a little," JC admitted, blinking at him. "And got some wine, and ... look, I don't ever have people over. Like, ever. Was that ... I mean, did you think I didn't want you there? You sounded so doubtful..."

"I wasn't sure," said Chris honestly, kissing at his lips again, sorry he'd had that moment of insecurity, of doubt, when it had so obviously hurt JC. "Sometimes people don't, is all. But ... you're different. I'm sorry. I'm really, honestly sorry and can you smile at me again now? Pretty please?"

"And I told Joey to go to Justin's," JC went on, biting his lip, but not looking *quite* as sad. "I *want* you to see my place, Chris. Laugh at all the computer geek stuff and Joey's beer can pyramid and just ... share that."

The sheer hope and honesty in JC's voice hit him hard. "Careful," said Chris, kissing him one last time before sitting up a little again. "I could fall in love with a guy like that."

He did his best to hide his relief when JC simply looked surprised at that, blushing furiously, but with no hint of fear in sight. "Wow," he said finally, looking down, then squinting back up at Chris. "What happens if I help you carry your books there, then?"

"If you help me carry my books I might have to call up my best girlfriend just as soon as I can and squeal about the cute boy I met," he teased gently, both glad and disappointed when the moment passed. And suprised by both, surprised there'd been a moment to begin with. "Such a gentleman. Now there's something I wasn't expecting."

"I think there was an insult in there, somewhere," JC winked at him, groaning as he got to his knees and yanked his pants up. One thing Chris wasn't surprised at was how smoothly JC transitioned them out of a potentially awkward conversation. Even if he found himself wishing he could've heard JC's serious response. "Next thing, you'll be talking about my little rod again..."

"I think little may have been the wrong adjective," admitted Chris, getting to his feet and offering JC his hand. "So I guess I'm done doing research for the day, huh?" He glaned at his pile of books and his backpack, still sitting nearby, and figured there was no way he could concentrate on that anyway.

"Well," JC said awkwardly, letting Chris pull him up, but not letting go of his hand after he did. "Can you check them out? You can work at my place tonight, if you want." He looked at him with big eyes. "Seriously, I don't mind."

Chris thought about it, but sighed and shook his head. "I'd be a pretty awful guest if I did that," he said. "Unless, of course, you'd find it hot. Then I'm sure I could manage." He smiled at him, though, not sure himself how serious he was about that. He'd never been so comfortable with someone he was sleeping with that they could just spend quiet time like that together.

"I promise, you could," JC said again, cocking his head and peering at him. "If it's stuff you'd really wanted to get done, or whatever? I have things I can work on." He smiled then. "And I might find it a *little* hot."

Chris just shook his head again, though. "I can't take those out anyway," he said, gesturing at the small pile. "But, um, I was gonna organize some notes tonight. I have a meeting with my advisor on Monday. That'd really be all right? And you might possibly jump me halfway through to distract me?"

"Well, maybe not *halfway*," JC grinned, finally. "More like a third. But yeah. That'd be more than alright ... I can put some programs on my laptop and bring it in the kitchen and we can work there, or you can spread out on my bed and I'll use the desk, or ... " he paused and blushed, again, and that boy looked adorable when he did. "I sound like the biggest dork, don't I? Like, 'hey, man, you offer to come over and fuck me, but why don't I suggest we study together instead?' I'm *such* a dork."

"Yeah, well, we're dorks together," said Chris, and he couldn't resist kissing him. "Because if you think back about twenty seconds, I asked if I could organize notes at your places after you told me you'd gotten some totally romantic spread together." He kissed him again. And again. "So I think you and me are gonna get along just fine."

JC's smile got even bigger. "Not some totally romantic spread," he protested weakly. "Don't expect much. Just wine and, you know, that totally sexy-turn on ... clean sheets."

Chris laughed, a bit of happiness swelling in him. "Well, it worked the first time," he said. "Why fix it if it ain't broken, right?"

"Just following your lead," JC said quietly, still smiling, then kissing his cheek before walking over to grab Chris's bag. "This all you need, honey?" he asked, swinging it up on his shoulder and running a hand messily though his own hair.

Chris stared at him for a moment in surprise, then grinned and nodded his head, going over to grab his glasses and slip them back on. "You're precious," he said, kissing the corner of JC's mouth. "Ready to go?"

"Yup," JC nodded, grinning and holding his hand again as they headed for the stairway. "And thanks. For, um. You know. I'm totally not kidding about being hard whenever I come in here now."

Chris took his hand without hesitation. "I'll have to make sure I'm with you whenever you come in here now, then," he said, loving how JC was looking, loving that glow that he was wearing. It was obvious what they'd been doing, but he knew no one would believe it, not seeing them coming out of a library. "I'd hate for that to go to waste."

JC stole a quick kiss as he waited for Chris to open the door to the stairwell. "I think that can be arranged."

JC shifted Chris's bag to his other shoulder and dug around in his pocket for his keys, fumbling just a little and probably not noticeably when he slid them into the lock. He had honest-to-goodness butterflies in his stomach, which was just about the silliest thing he'd ever heard, since he'd already fucked Chris five times as much as he'd done anyone else in forever. So inviting him over shouldn't have been a big deal.

"So ... here it is," he said, waving his arm around and dumping the keys on the table by the door. His *voice* was shaking. "My place."

"Nice," said Chris, looking around at just about *every*thing, seemed like to JC. "Clean. You must've thought my place was a dump, huh?" He turned his head back to JC and grinned at him. "Glad you didn't let that stop you."

"If I didn't live with someone, I'm sure mine would look like yours," JC admitted, trying to make himself relax as he set Chris's bag down carefully. "Not that I think it's a dump! It's just ... lived-in."

He stood close behind Chris, ready to follow him wherever he felt like wandering. "Um. And make yourself at home. I -- must not've said."

"Lived-in is a very polite way to put it," said Chris with a chuckle, and he reached back to brush his hand along JC's leg before taking a few steps into the living room. "This is really nice, though. You guys have some nice stuff. Where's your bedroom?"

JC chuckled, and felt his face heat up a little as he stepped around him to lead him down the hall. The thing was, he couldn't tell if that was a come-on or not, with Chris. "This first one's Joey's," he explained, pointing out the closed door. "And the bathroom's the one at the end of the hall. This one's mine." He pushed the door open all the way and stood back. "What, you wanted to make sure I didn't lie about the sheets?"

"Just wanted to peek," said Chris, reaching out to touch him again, briefly. JC didn't know what to make of those tiny touches, but he certainly didn't want to stop them. "A person's bedroom tells you a lot more about them than anything else, really. Except maybe their bathroom." He made a vague noise. "Hmm. Interesting."

JC narrowed his eyes at him, figuring that Chris was teasing him. And resolving not to get self-conscious about it. "Hmmm?" he echoed, fighting a smile. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that I think you're interesting," said Chris, turning around and wrapping a casual arm around JC's waist. "I like interesting things. I always want to know more about interesting things. And that thing on your desk intrigues me because I'm not entirely sure what it is."

"Oh, that," JC blushed, half of him wanting to shift around to block Chris's view, but the rest of him not wanting to pull away from his light embrace. "It's just ... a really, really long story." And one he wasn't sure he needed to go into: Chris was staring at a small statue, formed out of clay, that Joey had made for him. In appreciation, sort of, and it was kind of embarassing. And JC still didn't know what Chris thought about his relationship with Joey.

"Some other time then," said Chris easily, looking around the room again. "Until then, I'll just have to make up stories about it in my head. Pornographic ones, too, because those are the best kind." He finally turned away from the bedroom, and JC wasn't sure whether to be relieved or disappointed.

JC followed him out the room, walking so close he almost stepped on his heels. "Well. I mean. Did you want to hear about it? Or should I just finish the tour?" It was flattering for Chris to be curious about him, in the same way that it made him feel a little empty when he *didn't* push him on something.

Chris grinned. "Yes, that was a hint to tell me about it," he said, and when he reached back this time, it was to grab hold of JC's hand. "Unless you don't want to. In which case I *will* let it go, if you ask nice and maybe kiss me a few times."

JC kissed him anyway, then clutched his hand as he led him to the kitchen. "Oh. It's just ... this thing that Joey made, a couple years back. He kinda went through some really bad stuff, and like ... I don't know if you knew any of this, but Justin's the first person he's dated in *years*, 'cause he got really burned. And I was, like, the only person he talked to, and he kinda started joking that I was all heart and skinny legs. And *that*" -- he gestured back at his room -- "is Joey's portrait. A big clay heart stuck on skinny legs." He blushed, and couldn't bring himself to look at Chris's reaction.

Chris laughed again, softly, and squeezed JC's hand. "Why doesn't that surprise me, about you?" he said as they paused next to the kitchen counter. "You told me Joey hadn't dated in a long time, but you'd never said why. That sucks for him ... but hey, at least he's making up for lost time now. And Justin, I have to admit, he seems like a real sweetheart, too. But this does beg one question in particular ... "

"What's that," JC asked softly, still not meeting Chris's eyes. He was pleased that Chris thought so much of him, and wasn't shy about sharing those thoughts, but it just made him wonder -- still, ever since Chris had said what he'd said in the library -- if he should be holding back more than he was.

"How come you and Joey never became 'you and Joey'," he said, crouching down and tilting his head up at a ridiculous angle to see JC's face. "Not that I'm not glad that you were free and all. Having to fight Joey for you was definitely not in my plan."

"You had a plan?" JC raised his eyebrow, smiling as he bent over a little, unintentionally getting closer to Chris. Wondering how he was supposed to explain something that Chris had only seen the barest glimpses of. "We're just not ... for each other. He was so, so not ready when he first started seeing guys, and ... then we got too close. Neither one of us would ever put that in jeopardy by, um. Taking it to the next level." Chris didn't need to know that JC himself only believed that every other day, back before Justin was in the picture.

"Lucky for me, then," he said playfully, standing up again so they were practically nose to nose. "And lucky for you you got such a great friend out of it. Even though he's just a *tiny* bit neglectful right now. But hey, with Justin in their bed, who wouldn't be? It'll settle down soon."

"Will we settle down soon?" JC asked, grinning, but dead, dead serious. He snaked a hand behind Chris's neck and kissed him gently, happy beyond words that he didn't make him explain more about Joey. If Chris stayed ... well. If Chris stayed, he'd see. And JC didn't think he'd have any problems convincing him who he wanted to be with.

"I doubt it," admitted Chris, his nose pressed up against JC's. "It's too good. I don't want it to settle down any more right now. Besides -- " He shot a guilty glance toward his backback, still sitting on a chair. " -- we're studying together in your apartment, and probably gonna have dinner together and sleep together after. It doesn't *get* much more settled than that." He chuckled happily. "Pretty scary, huh?"

"Don't get ahead of yourself," JC teased, kissing the end of Chris's nose. "The sleepover isn't automatic." Though of course it was. It was just that joking about it made the whole thing easier to take. It *did* seem ridiculously settled, and comofrtable in a way it shouldn'tve been for someone he'd only known a couple of weeks. Someone who'd said he thought he could fall in love with him.

"Does that mean I have to earn it?" asked Chris cheekily, thankfully keeping the mood light. "Because I can think of a few ways, and I bet you're gonna really, really like them ... " He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

"Well, how's this," JC said, wrapping an arm around him and nudging him into one of the kitchen chairs, then sitting down on his lap without bother to ask. "You tell me what you think might be convincing, and I'll help you formulate your approach."

"Does this method guarantee success?" asked Chris with a grin, winking at him. "I was thinking that we could start with a blowjob, maybe in the living room, or at your desk. And then hint at the promise of more. Would that work?"

It was still so *weird* to think about having sex in his apartment, it took JC a second to respond. "More blowjobs?" he mused, rubbing his chin teasingly. "Or more ... other stuff?" Either way, his body was already reacting to the suggestion.

"Whichever," said Chris easily. "It's possible that the blowjob will be so spectacular that you'll never want anything else ever again. Or I could fuck you. At your desk. Or on your bed if we, you know, want to do it the traditional way." "You seem really interested in my desk," JC noted, running a finger along Chris's collarbone. "And Chris, honey ... maybe I've just not been as lucky in love as you, but there's no way I'd consider the sex we've had ... on a bed or not ... to be traditional. At *all.*"

"Well, you said you'd be working at your desk and I'd be on your bed," said Chris, "so it only seemed logical." He leaned in and licked at JC's ear, but more playfully than seductively. "And no, nothing I've done with you has been traditional for me, either."

JC squirmed a little, then got up off Chris's lap completely. "Um. Want something to drink? Watch some TV, take a shower? Work for a little while? I was serious when I said you can make yourself at home."

Chris looked at him in surprise for a few moments before nodding his head. "Um, okay, sure," he said, sounding more uncertain than JC had heard him yet. "Was there anything you wanted to do?"

JC watched him for a second, then reached in the fridge for a pitcher of iced tea. "Not really, that's why I was asking you," he said softly, smiling as he grabbed a lemon too and put both things on the counter. He wasn't sure what he'd said to unsettle Chris so much, but he refused to come across as insecure by asking. "Want some tea?"

"Yeah, that'd be good," said Chris, getting up from the table and moving up behind JC, slipping an arm around his waist again. "Did you leave for a reason?" he asked, seriously. "Should I leave you alone right now, and go get some work done? Because that's no big thing, I just ... " He stopped and kissed the back of JC's shoulder. "Couldn't read you."

JC chuckled and covered Chris's arm with one of his own. "*That's* what you ... oh, no, Chris. I just didn't want you to think that sex was the only reason I wanted you to come over. I didn't want to rush into it, I wanted ... " he paused and pulled out some glasses, then some ice and a knife. "I always want you, *that* way," he started over. "Like, in a sexy way. But I want you to know I'm happy around you in other ways too."

"I didn't think it was," said Chris, kissing his ear again. "I'm happy around you in other ways too. I just must've missed the transition there, from cuddling to iced tea. Hey, what kind of iced tea is that anyway? Did you make it yourself?"

JC nodded, pressing back against Chris's torso as he poured the glasses and pulled down a plate so he could slice the lemon. "It's peach tea, actually," he explained. "But not too strong; don't worry. And I'm sorry if I seemed abrupt, I just -- ow, FUCK."

He felt tears spring to his eyes as he squeezed the base of his thumb, trying to slow the blood seeping out of the cut he'd just inflicted on himself. "Ouch," he whimpered.

"Oh, shit," said Chris quickly, letting go of him just so he could turn him around. "Are you okay? Lemme see."

"Ow," he murmured again, his sight blurry as he tried to hold back the tears from dripping down his cheeks. He held his hands out to Chris cautiously, knowing instinctively that he'd help him rather than make fun of him for being a girl.

"Oh, that's not so bad," he said softly, sucking on JC's cut finger a little. "Bet it hurts like a sonofabitch, though. Got any bandaids in here?"

"In the bathroom," JC sniffed, his mouth parting a little as Chris's lips closed over his thumb, warm heat spreading up his arms. "Um. They're Scooby Doo."

"Should I ask?" said Chris with a laugh as he led JC in that direction, an arm still around his waist. "Well, I'm gonna. Why do you have Scooby Doo bandaids?"

"Just 'cause," JC sniffed again, his lower lip sticking out. "We like Scooby Doo. The last box was 101 Dalmations." He tried to tug his hand away, trying not to smile at the same time. "Stop laughing."

Chris sucked on his thumb again, only smiling now. "It's cute," he said, rummaging around for them. "It's unexpected. It's interesting. Now where the hell *are* they?"

"And interesting's good, right?" JC said softly, reaching over Chris's head in the medicine cabinet to hand him the box. "Don't take it back now, just 'cause I like medicinal supplies with animated characters." He looked at Chris from under his lashes, something he found himself doing with him a lot. "Put it on for me?"

"Interesting's still good," Chris assured him, putting the toilet seat down so he could sit on it and pull JC into his lap. "Animated characters and all. Don't they have Batman bandaids anymore, though? Those would be really cool."

"What's your deal with Batman," JC asked, slipping easily onto Chris's thighs, but then surprising him it seemed by swinging his legs around to straddle him. He held his thumb out in offering. "You couldn't shut up about the batmobile in the club last night."

"Batman's cool," said Chris with a casual shrug as he stuck the bandaid on firmly. "He's a hero and stuff. And he's kind of a dork. I like it."

"I like you," JC said, smiling, holding his thumb up. "Aren't you going to kiss it?"

"And I'm kind of a dork, too," said Chris, staring at the colorful bandaid. "I already sucked it, now you want me to kiss it too?" he teased, but he bent his head down and kissed it gently. "All better."

"You're not a dork," JC whispered, staring down at him, then leaning forward to kiss his mouth. "Or if you are, we are together ... we went over this already." He kissed him again, feeling warm and comfortable and affectionate, nevermind that they were sitting on the toilet in his bathroom. "Thanks for taking care of me."

"You're easy to take care of," said Chris, kissing his nose. "All I need to do is pay attention to you and kiss you better. It doesn't get much better than that." Then his mouth slackened a little and he just stared at JC. "Oh my god, I just got *cheesy*."

"Don't make *fun*!" JC pouted, pushing at his chest then pulling him close again. "You're mean to me, like, all the time. Just because I said I didn't want us to be cheesy doesn't mean you can't sweet-talk me a little."

"That wasn't making fun!" laughed Chris, holding him close. "That was me genuinely being shocked that you're able to do that to me. It's ... not something I'm used to."

"Well, you're nothing *I'm* used to," JC said, shocking *himself* with how seriously he said that, then kissing Chris firmly. Slipping his tongue between his lips tentatively. "You're everything I've never had, Chris, and I ... " he trailed off as he kissed him again, sliding further up into his lap. "'m just gonna shut up, 'kay."

"Okay," said Chris, holding him firmly as he kissed him back. "But some day I'm gonna want to hear you finish that thought, they way it was meant to be finished. It just ... it doesn't have to be right now, if you don't want it to be. I'm not going anywhere."

JC just nodded, and kissed him again, deeper. He knew he probably could've said what he was going to say, and Chris wouldn't have run, but he wasn't really as worried about Chris as he was about himself. He hadn't been in a relationship of consequence for almost as long as Joey had, but he knew enough to remember that jumping in too fast was rarely a good thing. "That's not another hint to tell you, like the last time you said it could wait for another day, is it?"

"No, that wasn't a hint this time," said Chris. "If it was a hint, I would have implied that I was just going to come to my own conclusion about what it would have been, if you didn't say." He helped JC to his feet as he got up himself. "We need to go somewhere there's more room," he explained.

"More room for what," JC asked quietly, kissing him, then kissing his cheek, and his neck below the ear, and his throat, not letting him push him out of the bathroom. He tasted warm, all the time, and sugary, and JC wished idly he'd seen his bathtub.

"More elbow room?" suggested Chris, definitely not dissuading JC from kissing him. "I just .... thought you wanted to not have sex right away. And I certainly don't object to sex in the bathroom, but I'm trying to be a little bit responsible for once and remind you."

"Remind me of what?" JC chuckled against his skin. His thumb was starting to sting a little, and he didn't want to have sex in the bathroom either, but he kind of didn't want to ruin the moment by trying to relocate. "And you're responsible. You're Mr. Condom when I was just gonna let you fuck me in the library without, you know."

"Shh, don't tell anyone," said Chris, bringing a finger to his lips. "I have a reputation to live up to after all. I was merely reminding you that a few minutes ago, you didn't want the sex thing. Which is fine, because there are a lot of things other than the sex thing. Like the this thing, right now."

JC shook his head. "I didn't *not* want the sex thing," he protested, grinning at how ridiculous and convoluted the conversation was getting. "I just didn't want you to think the only thing I was interested in doing with you was the sex thing. If you've figured out I like the other things, like the this thing, then we can definitely definitely do the sex thing."

"But I like the this thing now," said Chris. "And of course I like the sex thing but I like the other-than-sex thing too. So maybe we can do the this thing and then the study-or-whatever thing and then maybe the dinner thing and the sex thing. Or the sex thing and the dinner thing. Or the sex thing, dinner thing, sex thing again. Yes?"

JC grabbed him by the ear gently and kissed him again. "If the this thing isn't the sex thing, or the dinner thing, or the study thing, then what is it?" He nipped at his lip and smiled. "Just so I know."

"It's just ... " Chris shrugged helplessly as they kissed. "It's just this. This moment. Right now. And I kinda like it."

"Oh, *now* you only *kind of* like it," JC protested. "Am I kissing you wrong, or something?" He grinned, knowing his dimple was showing, and slipped his hands lower on Chris's back.

"Hmmm, that's possible," teased Chris, sitting back down and pulling JC onto his lap again. They almost lost their balance for a moment, but all that did was make JC fall closer to Chris's lips. "Maybe we should get some more practice? You think?"

JC laughed out loud and ducked his head to kiss Chris's neck, bracing himself with a hand on the wall above the toilet paper. "We really don't have to do it in here ... " It *was* warm, and he knew the toilet couldn't have been the most comfortable place to sit with someone on your lap. "Wanna see the balcony?"

"You have a balcony?" said Chris, staring at him, his lips still rosy and wet and inviting. "You have a balcony and I'm just now learning this? Um ... what floor are we on, anyway?"

JC laughed again and kissed Chris's nose. "The second. You didn't see the balcony? It's just off the living room. You don't have to make it sound like I live in a palace or something, either ... we have, like, beach chairs and a cooler out there, for when Joey's too lazy to go to the fridge for a beer."

"Okay. Right. One set of stairs, that's good," he said, looking relieved. "Yes, then, I would like to see this balcony of yours."

"Well, right this way," JC chuckled, crawling off his lap and holding his good hand out for Chris to take. "And I will show you said balcony." He flipped off the light, and held Chris's hand as the walked back down the hall. He'd heard relief in Chris's voice, too, when he'd said they were on the second floor, but wasn't sure whether to ask about it.

"I guess I wasn't paying much attention," admitted Chris as they went back into the living room. "You'd think I would've noticed a balcony, you know?"

"You're funny," JC said softly, opening the sliding glass door for him. "Oh! Let me go get the tea. Go ahead and sit, if you want."

"Sure," said Chris, and stepped out onto the balcony tentatively, though it looked like he was trying not to show his nervousness. He went to the edge and looked over and when he turned back around again he seemed fine. JC finally left to get the drinks when Chris sat down on one of the chairs.

He added fresh ice to the glasses and grabbed a bag of chips in his teeth to carry outside as well. He had to nudge the door open with his knee, and grinned when Chris hopped back up to help him. "Thanks," he said, after he'd rescued the chips. "So. The balcony. Not a bad view of campus, I guess."

Chris nodded as he sat back down, glass of iced tea now in his hand. "Yeah, it's not so bad out here," he said. "Nice breeze. Nice reminder that I have work to do. And hey, look, you can see the library from here." Then he turned his head and gave JC a wide, suggestive grin.

JC chuckled and sat down in his lap, again, figuring he'd keep doing it until Chris made him stop. He liked it. "You don't have to think about work right now, do you? Can't we just ... talk? You can tell me why *you're* not a 'Chris and somebody,' for example."

Chris shrugged, and adjusted his position so he could both accommodate JC in his lap and sip his drink, ending up wrapping one leg around JC's just to keep them both stable. JC liked that, too.

"I'm not a 'Chris and somebody' because I never found a somebody before," he said simply. His voice was more closed-off than it had been, but definitely wasn't completely shutting JC out. "Or, well, there were somebodies, but there wasn't the right somebody. Not everyone appreciates a guy like me, after all."

"Oh," JC said quietly, squeezing him a little tighter. Wondering what part of the perfect package that *he* thought Chris was wouldn't be appreciated. "Even girls?" he probed gently, pretty sure that he was into them as well, but not positive.

"Even girls," said Chris with a soft sigh. "I was with this one girl for a couple years and it was good but ... didn't work out. Sometimes these things don't. We still talk, though, which is kinda nice even if it's ... awkward." He shifted again, slightly, and took another sip. "But you didn't ask for my sob story."

"I just want to get to know you," He said, nudging Chris's shoulder with his forehead. "Remember? We know enough about each other now to know we want to know more? If you don't want to talk about it, I completely understand, but you *can*." So he *wasn't* surprised to hear about Chris's girlfriend. Ex-girlfriend. But it still made him the tiniest bit jealous.

"Not much to say," said Chris, kissing JC's head gently. "She's working on her MBA in California; I'm ... here. Talk to her on the phone sometimes but haven't seen her in about a year or so now. So no big thing anymore. She's just a little more ... serious-minded, than me, is all. So. Feel better now that you've heard it?" he asked, nudging JC's side a little then turning the nudge into a caress.

"If it means you're over it, I feel better," JC replied candidly, covering Chris's hand with his own. He thought that Chris was plenty serious, and so there must've been something else there. But it wasn't his business to ask any more than he already had. "I'm glad *I* don't have to fight *her* for *you*," he smiled. "Even though it wouldn't be my first time, honey."

Chris chuckled softly, and looked relieved that JC had been the one to lighten things. "Definitely over it," he said. "Been over it for a while, just took my time about finding someone else." He looked JC up and down very frankly for a moment. "Hmm ... she's got the fingernails going for her, but I think you could definitely have taken her anyway, if it came to that."

JC sniffed. "Well, good to know," he murmured, then pressed his lips to Chris's cheek. "Anything else you wanna tell me, honey? Or do I get to try and take your mind off her and back on me, now?"

"I had a dog named Socrates once," said Chris solemnly. "He was hit by a car. That's about it." Then he smiled softly and finally kissed JC's lips. "And my mind was on you the whole time, I'll have you know."

"It wasn't either," JC smiled, but he actually wouldn'tve been surprised. They were obviously hung up on each other hard, and Chris was nothing if not attentive. Now that he had him, at least.

He kissed him back, licking gently at his lips until he let his tongue inside. "I'm sorry about the dog, too," he whispered.

"It was a long time ago," whispered Chris back, kissing him breathless before pulling away again. "So now that you know something about me, I get to know something about you, too, right? That's how this game works?"

"It's not a game," JC protested, but he was smiling, and letting his fingers tease at the tiny tuft of hair that peeked out of the top of Chris's shirt. "And I already told you something about me today. But ... I mean, you can ask me whatever you want to know. I really don't have anything to hide."

"Well, I just told you about my last girlfriend, so you should have to tell me about your last boyfriend," said Chris with charming practicality. "I'm assuming it *was* a boyfriend, anyway. And it wasn't Joey." He kissed JC again teasingly. "C'mon, I promise I won't get jealous."

"It wasn't Joey," JC agreed, shifting just a *little* awkwardly on Chris's legs, although depending on Chris's definition, it might as well have been. "I'm not a big relationship person, really. The last boyfriend I *liked* was actually -- don't laugh -- the first guy Joey slept with. Which sounds bad but wasn't, promise."

"If you say so," said Chris, actually looking surprised. "If you tell you shared him, *then* I'll have to lavgh. Because you're an absolute blast in bed, but I didn't think that was your thing. Not that it would be, like, awful, if it was. But I'd still laugh."

"Well, it's not my thing with *Joey*," JC admitted. "No, it was after we broke up. He came and visited me when Joey and I were studying in Germany, and I kind of ... suggested." He chewed on his lip, worrying about how Chris might take *that*, since it was obviously hard for him to talk about *anything* in the last couple years of his life that Joey wasn't intimately involved in to some extent. "He was nice, but it ran its course, you know."

"Yeah, I know," said Chris. "I know how relationships do that. I have had a few, over the years. But okay ... this thing with Joey? Is confusing me. A little." He looked JC up and down again, making him just the tiniest bit uncomfortable, but Chris was also smiling which wasn't quite what he was expecting. "Okay ... none of my business ... but are you guys just best friends or what?"

"It is so your business," JC replied quietly, kicking himself for not just keeping his mouth shut and letting Chris see it for himself sometime without having to try and explain it. "If you really want to be with me, at least, it is. Um." He closed his eyes, and tried to decide what to say. How much to say.

"We're just best friends," he sighed finally. "If I say best friends with benefits, you're going to misinterpret. In reality it's somewhere in between. WAS somewhere in between."

"I have *no* idea what you're talking about," admitted Chris with an easy grin, "But that's okay. I'd have to be pretty stupid not to notice that you want to be with me, so I'm not gonna get all uptight about what you might have going. I mean ... I've *seen* the two of you on the dance floor, so I already know it's not *all* platonic. Or wasn't ... ?"

"No, it's platonic," JC sighed. "It is. I love him, I can say that without compunction. But just as friends. It ... took Justin a while to get it too." He closed his eyes. "We've never fucked. Or even come close, really. And I guess that's the important thing."

"It wouldn't bother me if you had," said Chris honestly, holding JC even closer now and stroking his hair softly. "Any idiot can tell how close you two are. But like I said ... I see how you are with me and I don't worry, you know? I can tell you're not thinking about someone else when you're with me."

JC pulled back enough to cup Chris's face in his hands, smiling slowly and then bringing him close enough to kiss. "I'm glad you can tell. And for the record, I'm not thinking about someone else at all. Even when we're not together." He kissed him again in relief, figuring he should've been dating older guys all along if they were this accepting and trusting.

"I won't insist on that part," said Chris, touching the tip of JC's nose with his finger. "But I like it anyway. So is it my turn now? Am I supposed to tell you something? You never told me the rules before we started ... " He pouted playfully and made JC kiss him again.

"There aren't rules!" JC laughed again, tipping a little precariously off Chris's knees. "But ... okay, here's something I want to know: seriously, why did it take you so long to ask me out? You almost had me convinced you just weren't interested."

"Why did it take *you* so long to ask *me* out?" countered Chris. "Come to think of it, you didn't." He gave JC another cheeky smile and kissed him again, holding him securely on his lap. "I wanted to be sure," he said after another moment. "Wanted to be friends first, wanted to make sure *you* were into *me*. Then I took you home with me."

"You did, and you were sneaky about it," JC complained. "Tricked me into going over to your place. At least I was honest about being terrified to have you over here." He smiled, knowing Chris wouldn't think he was really being critical. "Part B of that question, then: how're you so sure I was into you?"

"I wasn't," confessed Chris. "Til you left the bar with me last night. I knew you liked hanging out but I wasn't sure I was any different to you than anyone else. But I figured, okay, we're going by my place anyway, why not make an offer, you know? It wouldn't kill me if you turned me down. I'd be disappointed as hell and would go home and cuddle Rocky and sulk for a while, but I'd live. And ... you were worth taking that chance on."

"Thank you," JC said then, kissing him again. "For having the guts to do what I couldn't. I know sometimes I have this ... like, ultra-casual attitude, or whatever, but that's just because I don't ever want to set myself up." ncjmarlowe: "Why?" asked Chris seriously. "I mean, what are you afraid of? Don't you get something really good in return, when it works out?"

"I just don't like looking like an idiot," JC explained quietly. This was something he didn't ever talk about, not even with Joey. Why he was the way he was, why he was so distant with people he met. "For no good reason, I'm just ... I'm already a geek, you know? WHy give someone something else to make fun of me about?"

"I can't imagine anyone ever making fun of you," Chris blurted out. While so much of what Chris said was layered and convoluted, JC got the feeling that another good chunk of it was just whatever he was thinking at the time, with no filter between his brain and his mouth. Which was refreshing. "I mean, you're great. I would have been so stoked if you'd asked me out. Seriously. And, um, way, way less nervous."

"Well," JC said carefully. "Maybe that's why it's been so long since I've had a real boyfriend." He kissed the one he NOW had carefully. "Thank you for making me feel good," he went on. "You're wonderful at that, because I can tell you mean what you say."

"I always mean what I say," said Chris with a smile that made JC feel like it was just for him and always would be. "Get in a lot less trouble that way. Not that I don't get myself in a ton of trouble anyway, but it's a different kind of trouble, And I'm very glad that makes you happy."

"It does," JC said again, leaning over to bite at Chris's ear. "Okay, one more for me, then I'm taking you back inside. Better make it good."

Chris glanced over the balcony. "Yeah, okay, inside would be good. But you've been a wonderful distraction. Okay ... geez, I don't have one ready." He sipped his drink against as he thought about his, his forehead wrinkling just a bit. "Are you scared of what's happening between us?"

"To death," JC said simply, holding Chris tight so he couldn't retreat from him if he tried. "I've never had, like, an adult relationship. You're going to be the first person I've ever fucked in my bed. That doesn't have me too well poised to be, like, successful at this."

"I didn't know," said Chris softly, stroking his hair again. "Had no idea ... until you started saying about being insecure. You seemed to be doing this perfectly well, to me. Um ... you need me to slow down or anything? Because I've just kinda been barelling into this once I figured out that you liked me back .. "

"No," replied JC quickly. "God, no. I'm ... surprisingly fine. I want you here. I was the one who told you I wanted you to bring your work over, just so you *would* come. I mean, I'm totally *calm*, don't worry, I just ... you've maybe said some things I haven't heard before, maybe, and I'm ... processing."

Chris looked at him curiously, setting his empty glass down. "Said things? Like what?"

"You know," JC said, suddenly very nervous to be talking about this after all. "You know what you said. In, um, the library. About ... about the type of guy I was." He blinked a little. "And it's okay, God, I'm just still kinda reeling from it."

"Yeah, I said you're the kind of guy I could ... oh." Chris looked at him with wide eyes. "Don't let that freak you out, okay? I mean, I'm not gonna take it back, cause I meant it, but it doesn't mean it's all gonna happen at once or something ... "

"No, no, I know," JC protested, infinitely relieved that Chris obviously hadn't planned saying it, but feeling warm that he *remembered* saying it. "I know. I'm not *upset*. Just ... thoughtful." He smiled, and kissed Chris this time, knowing that if it was him he'd want the reassurance that everything was still ok.

"You're cute when you're thoughtful," teased Chris gently. "Actually, you're kinda cute all the time. And ... we can stay out here if you want. You seem to like it out here and, well, we've gotten kinda comfortable." He looked past him and out over the balcony again. "It's only the second floor; I'm fine."

"Well, if we stay out here, I get to ask another question," JC said carefully. "Wanna tell me why being out here has your heart beating faster every time you look over the railing?"

"Oh, I just have a little height thing," said Chris nonchalantly, his eyes focusing on JC again. "We're not nearly high up enough for me to get scared or anything. You just probably won't find me out by that railing is all. So yeah ... no penthouses for me."

JC nodded. "So what you're really trying to say is that your heart's beating faster for *me*, then, right?" He felt a bit bad that Chris seemed to think he needed to downplay something like that, but he understood it, too.

"Yeah, something like that," teased Chris, burying his face in JC's neck for a moment. "Actually ... I didn't realize it was doing that. I guess I'm just used to it, maybe."

"Shh, don't," JC teased back. "I'm trying to help you get in my pants. Just play along." He nuzzled his cheek against Chris's, then searched out his ear with his tongue.

"I didn't realize I needed help," said Chris, sliding a hand up the back of JC's shirt. "That's one thing I seem to be doing just fine with already. Though I could certainly use some more practice." He kissed along JC's throat. "You said Joey and Justin weren't coming back ... ?"

"Not if they know what's good for them," JC murmured, swallowing back a groan as Chris's kisses turned a little harder, reaching a hand over Chris's shoulder to grip the back of his chair. "Fuck, Chris, your mouth ... "

"Do they know I'm here?" he asked, licking the rim of JC's ear. "Or did you just tell them to fuck off for a while?"

JC shivered. "Um. Is it going to make you stop doing that if I tell you that I might've said I had someone coming over?" He swooned a little in Chris's lap. "I told you they were going to Justin's for the night..."

"I just don't want to have survived the library only to have someone walk in on us *here*," said Chris, sucking on JC's neck gently. "Especially since you already told me that's not your thing ... "

"No way," JC breathed, tipping his head back. "You're mine now, and if I see anybody else touching you, I'll ... I can be a bitch, is all. So I'm certainly not going to invite Joey or Justin to join us."

"They're kinda not my type anyway," Chris assured him, licking at his Adam's apple then sucking at the hollow of his throat. "So you won't need to prove your bitchiness today, I think. Nobody's gonna be touching me but you."

"What's your type, then," JC mumbled, holding on to the chair even tighter. "And shit, Chris, if you keep doing that I'm going to make you fuck me out here."

"My type is whoever turns me on and makes me feel fuzzy inside," said Chris, sliding his tongue along JC's collarbone. "They don't. You do."

"So you're not very discriminating, is that what you're saying?" JC moaned. "Thanks. That makes me feel so much better." He started tugging on Chris's shirt. "And I challenge you to define feeling fuzzy."

"I'm about as discriminating as it gets," protested Chris, sucking at the other side of JC's neck. "There are very few people who make me feel like that. At the moment ... one." He trailed his tongue up JC's neck and sucked gently on his earlobe. "Fuzzy is a kind of blurry, rushy, poundy, singy feeling ... but does it matter what fuzzy feels like as long as I feel it?"

"This needs to be off," JC muttered, yanking on the hem of Chris's shirt. "And I promise I'm not complaining, just ... trying to figure out if maybe we were feeling the same thing, is all." He fought against Chris's hold to try and reach *his* ear.

"So are we?" asked Chris, letting go only long enough to pull his own shirt off and begin tugging at JC's. "Feeling the same thing?"

"Yeah," JC shivered again. "Rushy. Blurry." He gasped as Chris pushed the shirt past his nipples, brushing against them. "Horny. Shit. Do we have to go inside?" He was more than willing to do it out on the balcony, but he didn't want to make Chris uncomfortable.

"Like I said," said Chris as he pulled the shirt over JC's head. "You're doing pretty well as a distraction. I'll be fine as long as you keep up the excellent distracting work." He bent his head to lick at JC's nipples ... which JC realized effectively blocked his view.

"Glad to see you approve," JC inhaled. "God, I'm so easy for you. Like ... embarrassingly so." He spread his legs wider so he could press his groin into Chris's, throwing his head back again and holding onto the chair behind Chris's head with both hands. "You make fun of me when I can't see you, don't you."

"I never make fun of you," murmured Chris, biting down softly and running his hands up JC's back. "Not when you're looking and not when you're not." When JC felt like he was going to fall back Chris held him, securely, and JC got the feeling he always would.

"Thank you," JC breathed, tipping his head down to kiss the top of Chris's, as he nipped and sucked on his nipples. "How are we going to do this, Chris?"

"Huh, how?" said Chris, obviously distracted with licking and nipping and kissing every bit of JC's chest. "JC ... we've never had any problems with *how* ... "

JC laughed breathlessly and tried to push Chris away before they both got too worked up to even think. "No, no, I know, but just ... if we're doing this out here, let me go get a condom, okay?" He kissed Chris's lips fleetingly. "Okay, honey?"

Chris flopped back into the chair and nodded his head. "Yeah, go now," he said. "Before it gets really hard to go. Um ... so to speak. " He gave JC a grin. "Thank God we're in an apartment now where condoms are probably leaking out of every possible nook and cranny, huh?"

"I promise, it's still hard," JC panted, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, loving the way Chris's cheeks were flushed and his own mouth was wet and his hair was just a spiky mess. "To leave you. You staying out here, or coming with?"

Chris glanced out over the balcony before answering. "I'll wait," he said finally, looking back at JC and grinning as he snaked a hand down his own pants. "I'm sure I can find something to do while I wait."

"Don't you fucking dare," JC said, only slightly kidding, and waiting until Chris pulled his hand back out before he turned around. "I want you, like, coveting my ass while you wait. When I come back I want you to do what you did in the library, go in me without prepping me at all. So that means *you* don't get any prepping, either. Got it?"

"JC," said Chris fervently. "I think I can safely say that I am *always* coveting your ass." He gave his crotch a brief pat before pulling his hand away and touching JC's bare chest. "We're not going to have any trouble giving you what you want, that's for damn sure."

"What you want, too, right?" JC pressed. "I mean ... this is okay, right? You're not just humouring me?" He clutched the hand Chris had touched him with and brought it to his mouth, licking at his thumb, and first finger, carefully.

Chris pulled it back, though, and brought JC's hand down with it. "Feel that?" he said, laying JC's hand gently over his crotch. JC could feel the head coming off it, feel the solidness beneath the fabric. "Do you really think it's possible that I'm just humouring you"

"No," JC swallowed, trying to pull his hand back, looking at Chris a little desperately when he wouldn't let go at first. "No, I ... just needed to make sure. Chris -- let me go, or I'm just going to drop to the floor right now and suck you, and I'll probably come all over myself doing it, and I just ... don't want to wait to have you."

Chris let go of him. "Go quickly okay?" he said in a rough whisper, grabbing JC's hair and pulling him into one last kiss. "That made me really hot. I don't want to wait either."

"Don't touch yourself," JC reminded him, smiling, backing through the door and then dashing down the hall to his bedroom. He was fairly sure Joey DID have condoms coming out of every nook and cranny in the place, but that didn't mean he knew where to look. And he knew exactly where *his* stash was.

He grabbed an afghan off the couch on his way back by, and pushed the door to the balcony back open.

"Took you long enough," said Chris, even though JC knew damn well he'd hardly been gone at all. To his credit, Chris wasn't touching himself, but he looked close. "Do you have everything? Can we fuck now?"

"We can fuck always," JC replied, slamming the door shut inadvertantly, then dangling the condom and tube of lotion in front of Chris's face and dropping the afghan to the ground. "Are you going to be snarky again if I ask how you want this to go?"

"I'm guessing it would be bad if we broke the chair, then?" said Chris, grabbing the lotion and condom with one hand and working the button of his pants with the other. "I'm up for just about anything, to be honest. Just ... no railing sex."

JC stood watching him for a moment, biting the inside of his cheek, waiting for Chris to finish taking off his pants -- he knew he couldn't wait too long to touch him, they were both too hot right then. But he still liked looking at him, wanted Chris to KNOW he liked looking at him.

"There's nothing wrong with the chair," he said softly.

"Good," said Chris, stripping efficiently and without any sort of teasing. "Then it's *not* a problem if we just happen to break it while fucking. Though I'm gonna let *you* explain it if we do ... "

"What are you gonna do to me, that you're so convinced we're going to break it?" JC asked, stepping closer and trailing a hand down Chris's side. "The library wasn't hard enough, for you?"

"The chair is flimsy and we're not," said Chris with a grin, reaching for JC in return. "But we're not going to get anywhere until you're naked, you know."

"No, I know," JC grinned back. "Better do something about that," he said teasingly, before dropping smoothly to his knees in front of Chris again. "Before I start doing the stuff we *can* do when I'm not."

"You could've saved me the trouble," grumbled Chris, starting on his pants. "You think it's fun, fiddling with your clothes when I know what's underneath, waiting for me? And you call *me* a tease ... "

"You're right, about the 'waiting for you' part," JC grunted, shimmying his hips a little to help Chris get his pants over them. "And I never called you a tease. When did I call you a tease? So far, you've given it to me every time I wanted it." He smiled and stretched to kiss him, trying to be just a little distracting.

"You tell me not to tease you," said Chris, giving his lips a peck, then capturing them for something much deeper. "That's the same thing." JC's pants slid down easily once they were past his hips, leaving him partially exposed.

"If you say so," JC sighed, standing up again so they dropped to the floor and he could step out of them, then nudging Chris back in the chair and stepping between his outstretched legs. "God, I want you. Desperately. I'd feel guilty for using you if I didn't like you so much."

"You can use me any time," said Chris, just staring at him now, his eyes roaming up and down JC's body. "And I'm not just saying that." He shifted his his seat, looking like he couldn't *get* any more aroused. "Am I really the only person you've had here?"

JC reached out a finger to trace along Chris's bottom lip and nodded slowly. "I promise you are. With other guys, I just ... always wanted to be able to leave them when I wanted to be able to leave them. And those were the guys I *liked*. The rest ... I didn't really want them to know me." He slipped his finger inside and looked at Chris intently. "You're special."

"So this is the first time you've ever had sex in your own apartment, then," said Chris, shaking his head a little and letting JC's finger fall away. "I'm not asking for a promise of that, JC. I wouldn't change my mind about anything because you'd had other lovers before. I'm just thinking that I'd better make this extra special good for you. Memorable."

JC frowned a little, bringing his finger back up to Chris's mouth again. "If you don't think that every time you fuck me's been memorable, Chris ... "

Chris smiled at him, nipping at the finger playfully. "I said 'extra special'," he reminded him. "I'm a romantic sometimes, all right? And first times are a big deal."

JC blushed. "Pseudo first times, I guess," he murmured, then moved his finger out of the way so he could kiss Chris's lips softly. "It's really not necessary, but ... I mean, if you want to, that's really sweet." He smiled and kissed him again, letting his finger trail down Chris's throat. "Romantic, like you said."

"Which doesn't mean I'm not going to fuck you until you scream," said Chris with a sweet smile. "It just means I'm gonna do it with style."

JC giggled and rested one knee on the chair between Chris's legs. "Okay," he nodded. "This I want to see, then. May I make one suggestion?" His wandering finger circled the head of Chris's cock teasingly. "You want to hurry it up, loverboy?"

Chris batted JC's hand away. "Way to ruin the mood," he said with a dramatic sigh. "All right, not on the chair. Not enough room and I want to be on top of you this time. So lie on the blanket, on your back," he said, nudging JC who wasn't quite sure what to make of this. "And, as you said, hurry. Or you're right, it won't last long enough to be any good at all."

JC stepped back obediently. "Except even when it only takes a minute, it's still the most amazing sex I've ever had," he admitted, trying to make up for Chris thinking he wasn't taking this seriously enough. "You joining me?" He bent over to straighten the blanket a little, then knelt and finally laid down, stretched out on his side.

"I'm thinking about it," said Chris, and JC groaned inwardly at him picking *now* to tease a little. "You're really looking kind of inviting like that. Might be even more inviting if your legs were already spread for me, but I think I can make do ... "

JC set his jaw and turned over on to his back, like Chris had requested in the first place. Smirking a little, then, he gripped his own erection, still rock-hard, and started stroking it purposefully. "Well, okay. I'll just ... what did you call this earlier? Find something to keep myself occupied? While you think about it."

"As long as I can watch," said Chris with a matching smirk as he knelt down on the blanket. "There's something we'll have to do sometime ... because you look really hot when you're touching yourself. Did you know that? Have you ever watched, while you were doing that?"

JC's hand froze, then resumed its motion a little more insistently. "Um. Just enough to see what I'm doing," he mumbled, scooting back on the blanket to give him room, spreading his legs right away. He took a breath, knowing he didn't have to be embarrassed in front of Chris. "You don't really just want to watch, do you?" he asked. "What if I do this?" He let go, slid his hand down against his hip, then behind his balls, and shut his eyes tightly as he teased at his own opening.

"Oh, I really, really want to watch," said Chris, his voice rough and a little breathless. "Especially when you do that. But ... not right now. Right now I really, really want to be inside you." JC could hear him fumbling with the condom and continued teasing himself, knowing that Chris was watching and was obviously turned on by it.

He pushed the tip of his finger inside himself, grunting a bit when he could *feel* it ... the handful of times he and Chris had fucked in the previous 24 hours was more than he'd done in months, and he could *feel* it. But he was also still loose, from the library, and definitely ready. Again. Ready always, for Chris.

"Oh," he murmured aloud, opening his eyes to watch Chris approach. "I'm still all loose from last time, honey. You can slide right in."

"That's pretty much what I was hoping to do," said Chris, and finally JC could see how wide his eyes were as he looked at him. "Do you even *know* how much you turn me on, all the time?" Chris lay his hand over JC's for a moment and then they were *both* touching him there for a few moments before Chris pulled their hands away entirely.

JC whimpered and braced his feet on the blanket, tenting his knees and letting them fall apart. "All the time?" he echoed. "Sounds like me. I did suck you off in the library within five minutes of seeing you, today."

"You did," agreed Chris as he moved closer, between JC's legs, lifting one of them gently. "And you're really good at that, too. Not unlike this."

"This ... is pretty much all you," JC sighed, tilting his head back and helping Chris guide his leg onto his shoulder. He rarely, rarely had sex like this; it felt too intimate, or something, with most people. But this time he was eager, looking forward to what Chris considered romantic. Or extra special.

"It's never all me," argued Chris, sliding in closer still and moving JC's other leg up and to the side of him. "No matter what we do. And I'm not just saying that cause it sounds like the right thing to say." He touched JC's hole again with his fingertips, not giving JC the swift entrance he'd been expecting, given what they'd done before. "You look beautiful like this, you know that?"

JC smiled and pushed Chris's hair back away from his face, not knowing what to really say in response to that. "Am I?" he asked finally. "I thought you liked my other side better."

"I like all sides of you," said Chris honestly. "But this side smiles at me." Moving forward, he pushed just the tip of his cock inside JC's body, guiding himself with one hand. "And does all sorts of other things to me, too."

"This side can kiss you," JC agreed, getting his elbows beneath himself so he could lean up for a kiss, finishing with a smile. He was amazed that it didn't scare him to be so close with Chris, too look in his eyes so much. "Or was that not what you meant."

"That was pretty much exactly what I meant," said Chris, pushing in a little futher, slower than JC had imagined. "It can bite me and lick me, too," he added with another tiny thrust inside. "And say sweet nothings and talk dirty to me ... "

"Oh, you like that, do you?" JC grinned, dropping his head back to the floor and closing his eyes to wait out the rest of Chris's teasingly slow entrance. "What should I talk about? That tying-up thing you mentioned earlier?" He *had* to keep talking, to keep himself from passing out from how good it felt.

"That'll do," said Chris with a slight moan, pushing further, almost all the way inside now."You could talk about just about anything and it would turn me on right now, though ... " He raised his hand then, curled it around JC's shoulder as he pushed.

"Well, I can at least try and keep it on-topic," JC murmured, grunting as his body stretched more and more to accomodate Chris. He'd just kiss him, but it took a lot of effort to get in that position. "I'm still thinking about it," he went on, keeping his voice low. "Tying you up. Straddling your body, making you suck me off, maybe? Or ... if you're into it ... I could maybe try and fuck *you* ... "

Chris moaned again and thrust that last little bit inside him. "If *you're* into it," he said, panting softly and resting for a moment, "I definitely wouldn't stop you." He leaned forward, stretching them both, and gave JC's face a quick kiss. Then he drew himself out partway and thrust for the first time.

"Oof," JC grunted, staring up at Chris as he withdrew again. "I don't do it much," he acknowledged. "But I can be convinced to make an exception." He concentrated on breathing for a second. "Seriously, only if that's something you do. I wasn't even sure."

"Sometimes," said Chris softly, pushing into him again and holding himself there for a moment. "If I like the person I'm with enough." He leaned forward again to change his angle and thrust, his eyes locked with JC's for the moment.

JC shuddered at all the sensations from the new angle, from the way Chris's voice sounded. "And?" he asked quietly, blinking his eyes. "Do you like me enough, Chris? To let me in?"

Chris leaned down further, far enough to kiss him for a too-brief moment. "Yeah," he said. "Yeah, I'd let you in, JC. I wouldn't even hesitate."

"Okay," JC breathed, completely distracted by Chris's eyes. "Wow, so. This ... actually *is* romantic. That was really ... romantic." He grinned, he couldn't help it, and ran shaky hands around the back of Chris's neck.

"Told you," murmured Chris. "Hopeless romantic, deep inside." He thrust again, leaning back up and finding a rhythm, one hand still curled around JC's shoulder and the other around his thigh. "Hopeless hedonist on the outside."

"Kind of a deadly combination," JC murmured, groaning louder and wondering fleetingly if the neighbors could hear them. "You're going to wear me out, aren't you. You think we'll ever see each other without both of us coming at least twice?"

"Not if we're lucky," said Chris with a grin, moving a little faster once it got easier to move in and out of JC's body. He was unpredictable, changing his angle regularly, and it got to the point where JC gave up trying to guess what he was going to feel next.

"God," JC hiccuped, his eyes closing tight again. "Oh, Chris." His whole body felt hot, his brain felt fuzzy, his veins felt like they were burning. He was completely losing consciousness about what he was saying. "Stay, tonight. Do me again."

"Okay," said Chris, just loudly enough for JC to hear. "To both." He gripped JC tighter as he thrust now, his purpose clear. The hand that had been on JC's shoulder moved down to wrap around JC's erection, but it was hardly necessary given what Chris was already doing to him.

"Yeah, stay," JC said again, hissing when Chris started squeezing him gently, then bucking up to meet his motion. "Oh, God, oh ... " he blurted, looking up again to see Chris focused intently on his face, before the rest of his words came out in a rush. "God, you're the only kind of guy *I* could fall in love with."

Chris's smile told him everything. And if it hadn't, his thrusts might've, becoming more erratic, more desperate, much, much less in control. Chris lost control of his breathing, too, heaving in breaths as he stroked JC and slid in and out of him, hitting JC's prostate time and time again.

JC whimpered and bit his lip desperately as he came all over Chris's hand, only barely aware of what he'd just said to him and wondering if Chris would want to talk about it later. "Shit," he coughed when he was finally spent, gripping Chris's arms and looking him in the eye again.

For the first time they came together, Chris letting himself go the moment JC began to come and moaning loudly. When their eyes locked again, Chris was silent, just looking at JC and gripping him tightly and still struggling to breathe normally.

JC knew he should say something else, thank him or *something*. "Is it possible," he murmured, reaching up to him to kiss his bottom lip, "that gets better every time we do it? That's scary, babe."

"I guess," said Chris, taking a deep breath and smiling down at him, "that I succeeded in making it special. And I'm sure it was a special moment for the rest of the building, too." He gave JC a grin and a wink and kissed him again.

JC laughed into his mouth, knowing his eyes were sparkling as much as Chris's. "You think they haven't heard enough of it?" he reminded him. "And Joey and Justin *do* do it over the railing, so." He kissed him softly again. "I'm telling you one last time, Chris. Every time we do it, it's special."

"*Extra* special," clarified Chris, not moving off him yet. "And I don't doubt that the do it over the railing. Or just about everywhere else, too. There's probably nowhere sacred in that apartment of yours." He kissed JC's throat this time and leaned up again, taking a bit of his weight off JC's body. "You doing all right?"

"I'm okay," JC said softly, wondering just how far Chris would go to take care of him. "And, um. There's definitely one place that's still ... sacred." He pulled Chris back down to him again. "I guess I can be a stupid romantic, too."

Chris smiled at him. "Are we maybe going to be in that place tonight?" he asked softly, stroking JC's hair and shifting enough so that JC could let his legs down all the way if he needed to.

"If you want to be," JC swallowed, letting Chris pet him tenderly. Trying not to be embarrassed about what really didn't have to be a big deal. "I mean, I'd definitely like you there. Clean sheets, remember."

"You don't need to convince me," said Chris, finally moving so that he slid smoothly out of JC's body and was able to just lay across him. "I already said yes, remember?"

"I remember," JC murmured, burying his nose in Chris's neck. "And as much as I'd love to stay here, this is kind of ... death on my back. Wanna go inside? We can shower, if you want, or even take a bath?" He blushed. "Or nap. Or soemthing."

"Oh," said Chris softly. "You should've said something, when I asked if you were okay." Quickly, more quickly than JC had been expecting, he moved off of him and slid the condom off his body. Finding no place to stash it -- they hadn't though of that -- he just held it in his hand. "Can you grab out clothes? We can worry about what to do when we're inside ... "

"Sure," JC said measuredly, grunting as he pulled himself up using the chair. "And don't worry, honey. I was fine. I could've stayed there longer, I just ... was trying to make us both more comfortable." He did grimace a little as he bent over to get their clothes and the blanket, though, but smiled when he caught Chris's worried glance.

"Okay ... " Chris said slowly, and with one last glance out over the balcony -- and the tiniest of shivers -- he disappeared back into the apartment.

JC followed him tentatively, blinking a little to adjust to how much darker it was inside the apartment. He dropped the blanket by the couch, and shifted on his feet as he waited for Chris to look at him. "Can I get you something? Food, or drink?" He was, for the first time since they kissed, actually a little uncertain about what came next with them.

Chris wrapped the condom in a paper towel and dropped in in the garbage, then washed his hands before turning back to JC. "Do you want to just ... sit? Wherever?" he asked, looking around the kitchen, then at the living room where JC still stood.

JC glanced down at the clothes in his hands, and held Chris's underwear out to him cautiously. "Um, sure?" he said, squinting to try and read Chris's expression. "Actually, if you didn't want to shower or whatever, I'm gonna go clean up a bit ... "

Chris moved toward him and forced him to drop the clothes to the floor with a gentle tug. "Why are you being so awkward with me?" he asked him, wrapping one arm around JC's waist and using the other to stroke his face softly. "Did I do something wrong?"

"Fuck no," JC said immediately, then blushed and looked down when Chris's lips curled into a smirk at that. "No. You're just ... quiet, and that's not like you, and I'm trying to make you feel relaxed. Which is apprently backfiring awfully." He looked up at him again, sheepish.

"I get quiet sometimes," admitted Chris, "when I'm so well-fucked that my brains are scrambled. I just ... wanna be wherever you are right now. Is that okay?" He squeezed him gently and kissed his chin. "This is the hopeless romantic coming out. Don't worry, I'll recover soon and force him back into hiding for a while."

JC squeezed him back, relieved. "You don't have to make him go away," he said softly, reaching for Chris's hand, making a decision for himself. "Let me take advantage of it for a while, okay? C'mere." He pulled the boxers back out of Chris's other hand and started walking backward down the hall, smiling encouragingly at him.

"Where are we going?" asked Chris, following him without question, though, a tiny, uncertain smile on his face now. "What are we going to do?"

"Bath," JC replied decisively. "I'm a gay man who barely ever gets to do something like that, so if you're in the mood to be romantic, I'm going to indulge." He cocked his head. "So let me? Please?"

Chris's smile became a lot surer. "I'm definitely not going to stop you," he said, taking a couple steps closer. "That sounds wonderful."

"Really?" JC breathed in relief. "Oh good." He stopped short, grinning at Chris wehn he just kept himself from bumping into him, and kissed his lips softly. "Here, towels," he said, reaching into the linen closet. "And the candles are already in there. Never been used, either."

"You have candles in your bathroom?" said Chris, lifting an eyebrow. "Just because?" He held the towels that JC gave him, but looked like he was waiting for an explanation of some sort.

JC shrugged again. "Yeah, under the sink. I told you. Never got to indulge. That doesn't mean I didn't hope for it, every once in a while." He circled his arms around Chris's back and kissed his throat as he kneed him gentl in the leg to force him into the bathroom. "I hope for a lot of stuff."

"Oh!" said Chris with a grin, stumbling back a little. "I thought you had them set out or something. Not that there would have been anything wrong with that, of course."

JC chuckled, but managed not to blush that time. "No, no. I told you, clean sheets and wine. That was the extent of my preparations for seduction. What, you're gonna leave now, or something?"

"And it turned out you didn't need anything to seduce me with after all," said Chris, nuzzling him before finally stepping into the bathroom. "All you had to do was show up."

"Well, you could at least pretend that it was a challenge," JC sniffed, pulling the towels out of Chris's arms and placing them on the toilet, then kneeling down to grab three or four candles and a book of matches out from under the sink. "I mean, I *worked* for that blowjob in the library," he teased.

"But I'm not a challenge," protested Chris softly, nuzzing him again. "Not when it comes to you. I only pretend to be."

"You're not?" JC asked, turning to him for a real kiss. "You mean I have you wrapped around my finger already?" He smiled and started the water in the tub. "I didn't have to try *that* hard."

"You have me wrapped around whatever you want me wrapped around," admitted Chris candidly, pulling JC back to kiss him again. "Are you sure you don't want Romantic Sap to go back into hiding?"

"No, he's fun," JC protested softly, pulling Chris's hands off his body and kissing each of them before letting go. "Let me indulge in that, too, while we're in here." He shut the door behind them, and lit the candles, and turned off the light. "Is that okay?"

Chris smiled at him. "It's definitely okay," he said, blinking a few times in the soft light. "Expect him to disappear in time for dinner though. And reappear some time tonight, when we're wrapped up in one another in your bed ... "

JC smiled and sat down on the edge of the tub, keeping his eyes on Chris as he spread his legs slowly and purposefully. "You do the romantic thing surprisingly well," he admitted, reaching behind himself to trail his fingers through the water. "Hand me a washcloth?"

Chris handed him a washcloth from the pile on the toilet, staring at JC's body openly and smiling at him. "Need anything else?" he asked, with only a hint of suggestion in his voice.

"Offering anything else?" JC replied silkily, lifting one foot and slipping it over the edge of the tub into the water, so he was straddling the side.

"Offering everything else," said Chris, spreading his arms a little then kneeling on the floor next to JC. "What can i do for you?"

JC chuckled, bringing his other leg over and hissing a little as he slipped into the water. "Come in here with me?" he asked softly, running a wet hand through his hair and blinking as drops of water fell on his cheeks and eyelashes. "To start."

"It's gonna be awful crowded," teased Chris, stroking JC's hair and cheek before getting in, "but I think I can handle it. Mmm, warm."

JC nodded and gathered Chris into his arms, pulling and nudging until he was situated between his legs, his back against JC's chest, his neck exposed for JC's mouth. "Is this nice?" he whispered, suckling at the damp skin at Chris's nape. "When we've got the sap out of our systems, we can pretend it never happened. But for right now?"

"It's very nice," Chris murmured, settling in against him and tiltling his neck. "And I doubt I'll ever pretend it never happened. Though i may not bring it up in polite company."

JC smiled. "We don't keep any polite company," he reminded him, lifting a leg and draping it over one of Chris's, hitching him closer as he soaked the washcloth and kissed his neck more intently. "Are you sure you're happy? You're still quiet."

"I'm basking," said Chris, wriggling against him playfully. "I'm quiet when I bask. Sheesh, it's not like I *never* shut up, you know. Just ... not often."

"Oh, okay," JC murmured knowingly, reaching under the water to rub gently at Chris's groin, even though of the two of them, he needed cleaning a lot less than JC did. "And be careful where you rub that thing, babe."

"I'm being *very* careful where I rub 'that thing'," teased Chris, wriggling again for a moment before pushing into the washcloth just slightly.

JC grunted when he felt his own cock start to thicken again, almost achingly as a result of just way more stimulation than he was used to. But Chris's ass was tight, and round, and moving insistently against him even if it wasn't intentional. The amount of sex they were having felt ridiculously wanton. "Are you?" he mumured, sucking at Chris shoulder. "Being careful?"

"Unless that's your knee I'm rubbing, then yes, I'm being very careful," said Chris, turning his head back to give JC an impish grin.

"You're bad," JC groaned, stretching over Chris's shoulder to kiss Chris's face, letting the washcloth drift a little lower between Chris's legs. "All I wanted was an innocent bath. A romantic innocent bath, with my lover, yes, but still..."

"This is innocent," said Chris with a soft smile, finding JC's lips for a moment. "I doesn't have to be anything ... we're just playing, right? Doing what feels good? Or ... I am, anyway ..."

"No, we are," JC agreed, his voice catching. "I was just teasing. You turn me inside-out, Chris, and any time I'm not spreading my legs for you, it's 'cause I'm too busy trying to figure out the right thing to say to you."

"Good," says Chris, sliding slowly against him now. "Not that I can have you any time I want. That you like what we're doing. That's the good thing."

"I just wish you weren't so tough to read sometimes," he admitted quietly, even though he liked that Chris kept him on his toes, even as he used his hands on Chris's hips to fit his groin tighter against Chris's ass. "I just want to know *you* like it. You like *me*. I don't need to be told a lot, just ... maybe once more?"

"How could you not know I like it," asked Chris softly, "when I just told you that I did?" He turned his head again to give JC another encouraging smile. "But I'll tell you again, if you need to hear it. I'm exactly where I want to be, whenever I'm anywhere with you. And especially right now."

"You didn't say you liked it, you said you were glad *I* liked it," JC protested, pinching Chris's thigh and moaning a little when it made him squirm back against him again. "Why especially now?"

"Because now is where we're at right now," said Chris, turning his head back and sighing contentedly. "And I'm sure I said I liked it. I must've said I liked it. Didn't I?"

"No," JC shook his head, smiling, and wrapped his other leg up on top of Chris's too. "You forgot that part. And your logic is a thing of wonder, baby." He squeezed him close again, with his arms and his legs, thrusting very, *very* gently against Chris's ass.

Chris moaned softly, barely more than a loud exhalation. "Well, I *meant* to say it," he said after a moment, pushing back against JC just as gently. JC hadn't been sure how much Chris would be into it, with JC right up against *his* ass for once, but he seemed to be responding just fine.

"I'm not suggesting anything," JC murmured into his ear, "But. In the interest of full disclosure? For, um, future reference? Is this ... I mean, you've done this kind if thing before, right?"

"This kind of thing?" repeated Chris, sounding just the tiniest bit wary. He stopped moving. "This kind of thing meaning what, exactly?"

"Sex, like this," JC said carefully, vowing not to get nervous, or self-conscious for suggesting it, because hell. It's not like they hadn't DONE it eight times already, why should talking about it be strange? He used his legs to nudge Chris's open a little more, both of them slipping a little deeper into the water. "What we talked about earlier. Me maybe being inside you."

"Oh," said Chris, nodding his head slowly. "Yeah, I have. Um, a couple times. But that's not what we're doing right now ... is it? I mean, we're just fooling around ... "

"Shh, no." JC said quickly, but softly. "We're just playing, baby. I just ... you're really tempting, and I was just wondering when ... *if* ... we do it, if it was something you were familiar with." He didn't really get in the mood to top that often, but fuck if he didn't think maybe he might that night.

"Yeah," said Chris, visibly relaxing again and moving slowly against him once more. "Okay, yeah. Don't worry ... it's something I've done before. I just ... well, frankly, I need a lot more preparation than I've been giving you, is all."

JC chuckled and nuzzled against his back. "That's not an insult, is it?" he murmured. "Chris, baby, that's fine. I'm not going to fuck you in the tub in any case. And I'm not going to do it unless I know you want to. I guess I was just ... being nosy."

"That's not nosy, that's important stuff," said Chris, sounding like he was taking it seriously. "Stuff you need to know for when we do that. I'm sure a hell of a lot happier you *asked* rather than just doing, like some people would." He took a deep breath and seemed to relax again, leaving JC wondering just what brought that on. "Of course it's not an insult, unless you think it's an insult to acknowledge that you're a lot more used to doing that than I am."

"No, it's not an insult," JC replied, trying not to sound meek. "Just ... relax, baby. Chris. Okay?" He stroked what he hoped were soothing hands down Chris's thighs. "And I'd never just *do* something to you, without asking first. I ... care about you a lot, already, remember?"

Chris took a couple more deep breaths and nodded his head. "I'm relaxed," he said quietly, leaning into JC's embrace. "Sorry ... I'm fine. And this feels really, really good. I know you'd never do anything like that to me."

JC hooked his ankles together, his legs wrapped tightly around Chris's hips, and then snaked his arms around his shoulders. "Chris, baby," he said softly, doing his best not to scare the man he held closer than he'd held anyone in ... ever. "You're ... do you need to tell me something? I mean ... if there was something you needed to talk about, you know you could." He wondered if he was off-base, the way he was reading him. "You know that?"

"Mmm," said Chris, relaxing even further against him. "No ... nothing. Just not everyone's as considerate as you is all. You don't need to worry about me, okay?"

"Okay," JC whispered, kissing his neck, then leaning his head back against the wall. Maybe he didn't have to worry about him, but it didn't mean that the whole exchange hadn't made him a lot warier about how he touched him. At least Chris didn't have to deal with him poking him in the back any more.

Chris turned his head back toward him again. "I really did do something wrong this time, huh?" he said softly. "It's okay. It happens sometimes with me. Just let me know what I can do to make it better, okay?"

JC picked his head back up at fixed Chris with a serious look. "You didn't do *anything* wrong, baby," he said quietly, hoping that maybe it felt good to Chris to hear him call him that still. "We're still relaxing, right? Enjoying being with each other, and touching each other?" His legs curled up closer around Chris's body. "I am."

Chris kissed him gently. "If you're sure," he said. "I not uptight about owning up if I make a mess of things. So you're gonna start touching me again, right?"

"I think just about every inch of my skin is touching some part of you right now, lover," JC snorted softly. "I'm not sure what else I can do."

"You know what I mean," said Chris, sliding his body against JC's. "What you were doing before. Sorry I got all weird there."

"Don't be sorry," JC replied, kissing his neck and reaching up to rub a thumb gently over one of Chris's nipples. "Just ... will you trust me to tell me why you did, sometime? Like maybe when I tell you what I was going to say, in the kitchen earlier? Would that be fair?"

"That's fair," said Chris quietly. "If you really want to know. But I'm being honest when I say it's no big deal, though." That didn't tell JC much of anything, though. As far as Chris was concerned, it seemed that nothing about him was 'a big deal'.

"Well, okay. Then maybe we can have that conversation soon," JC agreed, perfectly happy to let it drop at that, not at all willing to be a pest to Chris. Even if he just wanted to know as much about him as he could, he admitted to himself, starting to suck on his neck. "This kind of what I was doing before?"

Chris smiled at him and turned back around so JC had better access to his neck. "Yeah, just like that," he said, squirming against JC's lap. "That's a good start."

"The funny thing," JC murmured conversationally, letting his tongue dart out to lick at a drop of moisture on Chris's back, "is that -- amazingly! -- I can do two things at once. Like ... kiss. And, um. Listen." He wondered if Chris might balk at that, at him being pushy, but thought maybe he wouldn't.

"You're very talented, then," said Chris, sighing almost too softly for JC to hear. "Was there ... something in particular you wanted to listen to, then? Because I'm remarkably talented at talking and being kissed at the same time. As long as it's not my lips, of course ... '

"Just ... anything you think I might want to know about you," JC said, still casual, and not fooling anyone. "Anything that might prepare me, in case you do that 'getting all weird' thing again." He sucked gently on Chris's shoulderblade. "Hmm?"

"It was just what I said," said Chris quietly, not putting up any fuss about talking about it now that he knew what JC was looking for, which was a bit of a relief. "Not everyone is as considerate as you. I'm -- obviously -- not exatly a big guy, and people ... make assumptions."

"About what you like to do?" JC clarified, holding Chris up but slipping down against him again so he could kiss a little lower on his back. "I'm sorry. I won't hurt you, Chris. Okay? You don't have to freeze up when I touch you, no matter what."

"Yeah, about what I'd like to do," agreed Chris, moaning softly. "I know you won't hurt me, JC. But you did ask ... " He sighed softly and leaned forever, his chin bumping his chest. "When they're that much bigger than me, they can pretty much get what they want anyway."

JC knew plenty about that, *plenty*, but didn't want this to turn into something about him. "You said I can get what I want with you too," he tried to tease, licking along Chris's spine. Wanting to see his high-sprited boyfriend back. "And I'm not much bigger than you. Am I just that persuasive?"

Chris laughed softly. "You're just that good," he said quietly. "And I trust you. With everything."

"Yeah?" JC smiled to himself. He rubbed his other thumb along Chris's lip. "With this?" His other hand dropped to Chris's lap, cupped the weight of his balls. "This?" He took a breath and murmured against his shoulder as he reached for Chris's breast, resting his palm lightly over his heart. "This, even?"

"Definitely that," he said, almost under his breath, wriggling again, unable to remain still. "That and many other things, too. There isn't ... there isn't anything I don't want you to do with me."

"We'll have to try it all, then," JC assured him, licking at him some more and picking up the abandoned washcloth. "Anything I should start with, baby, or is it your turn to make sure *I'm* clean?"

"I haven't rubbed you clean yet?" teased Chris, wriggling in his lap and swishing the water in the tub. "I'm going to have to try harder, then."

"Is that what you were trying to do?" JC asked innocently. "Oh, my. And here I thought you kept squirming with your ass against my dick to make me hard for you or something." He ignored Chris's sqwauk and starting rubbing his legs a little. "No? My bad."

"That's just a pleasant side-effect," said Chris, rubbing against him purposefully. "It's not like I *planned* that or something. No, not me ... "

"Pleasant for *you*, maybe," JC muttered, sucking at his neck again then unwrapping his legs and arms. "Why is it," he mused, grinning, sloshing around as he tried to wriggle out from behind Chris, "that even when I'm the one behind you, I'm *still* the one getting teased?"

"Because I'm talented like that," said Chris, wriggling one last time. "And don't try and tell me you weren't enjoying it either ... "

JC just raised an eyebrow at him as he manuevered around the tub, nudging Chris back against the edge and slipping between *his* legs that time, except facing him. "You about ready to get out?" he murmured, licking down Chris's chest./ "Water's getting a little cool."

"But I'm comfortable," whined Chris playfully, splashing a little water at him. "What are we going to do if we get out?"

"Well," JC murmured, slipping along his body. "I'm going to wrap you up in one of those towels, and walk with you next door to my room. And then I'm going to *unwrap* you, and lay with you down on my bed, and just ... lay with you there, while we both dry off. And then maybe I'll get up to get us some food from the kitchen. But mostly just a lot of laying." He licked Chris's jaw. "It's a comfortable bed, too."

"I think that sounds just about perfect," said Chris, becoming almost still all of a sudden. "I think I would really like that. REALLY like that."

JC cocked his head at him, tried an encouraging smile. "Well, okay then. Up we go?" He got to his feet carefully, stepping over the edge of the tub, grabbing one of the aformentioned towels. "Be careful standing up, babe," he said, holding the towel out for Chris to step into.

Chris stood up without slipping and stepped out of the tub into JC's waiting arms. "No one's ever done this for me before," he said with a smile.

"Done what for you?" JC asked curiously, wrapping the terrycloth around him and rubbing his arms vigorously before bothering to grab himself a towel to dry off with. "Given you a bath? A dirty boy like you, I find that hard to believe." He smiled and kissed his nose.

"Taken care of *me* like this," he said, wrinkling his nose as JC kissed it. "I've always kinda been the guy that took care of himself. "And I may be a dirty boy, but I'm dirty in all the ways that you like, and you know it."

"I didn't say you weren't," JC replied, holding a wriggling Chris still to kiss his nose again. "I'm kinda waiting for you to get dirty with me again shortly, too."

Letting go, he wrapped his towel around his waist, and cracked the door a little to let the steam out; laughing when he looked down and his erection was almost more obvious under the towel than it had been when he was naked.

Chris shivered a little in his towel and wrapped himself tighter. "I'm definitely impressed by your stamina," he noted, crossing his arms over his chest. "Among other things."

"It's not me, it's you," JC protested. "Coupled with the fact that I haven't gotten laid in forever. But mostly you." He turned his back to him, both to hide a little and to grab another towel for his hair. "Um. WHat other things?"

"Are you trying to get me to flatter you? teased Chris. "Not that I won't, but you can be up front about it. I have plenty of nice things to say about you, any time. Like how you're really good in bed. And how you're smart enough to hold your own in a conversation with me. You know, not that i'm bragging or anything. And despite the fact that you're in engineering, you *do* have an imagination."

"I thought you had something else in particular in mind," JC protested, blushing. "I wasn't fishing for compliments. But those were very nice ones." He turned back to him, and tugged him closer by pulling on the towel. "I just love that you're smart. And keep me guessing. I can't decide if I like it more than the fact that I'm always hard around you, but either way, it's a close race."

"Maybe it's both things," said Chris with a grin. "Maybe that's why you like me better than the other boys. Cause I've got it all, baby. Well, except breasts. And I'm guessing that you can do without those, anyway."

"Was never a fan," JC nodded seriously, before breaking out into another grin. "You ready to let me worship you a little, boy? I'm beginning to feel a little self-conscious about that bed and how much action it *hasn't* seen ... "

"Well, at least it'll have good springs, then," said Chris, rubbing his arms briskly for a moment as cool air flowed in from the hallway. "And you don't need to worship me, I'm having plenty of fun worshipping *your* body. Unless, of course, you're wanting to ... "

"Of course, I want to," JC said, leaning over to kiss him and then walking him out of the bathroom, sucking on the back of his neck again. "We haven't done this slow, yet, baby. And we're getting a backlog of things to do, aren't we? Tying you up, letting me be inside you ... there was something else, too, I just forget ... "

"We'll get around to everything, eventually," said Chris confidently. "We're going to have lots of time, right?" He stopped JC for a moment to be able to kiss his lips firmly. "I think you and I are both too used to trying to cram everything we can into one night."

"Well, that's a very sweet way of telling me to slow the fuck down, Chris," he laughed, once he'd stopped kissing him back. "I'm sorry, I just ... it's not even that. I just can't get enough of you, literally. I can tell you right now I'm going to be bugging you for sex all evening until we just physically *can't* any more."

"I'll just have to wait until you pass out from exhaustion to do my work, then," said Chris with a smile, and JC noted that while he didn't argue with the rest, he didn't agree with it either. "I have to warn you, I don't run out of energy that often. But then ... neither do you, it seems."

JC laughed at that, too. "Actually ... that's the funny thing. I usually sleep like, eleven hours a day. Like, total lethargy boy. I must be running on hormones alone, the past 24 hours. That, or you rub off on me in a lot of good ways." He led him into the bedroom and close the door softly behind them.

"I rub off on you in all sorts of ways," said Chris, looking around the bedroom whilc JC watched him. "Though, come to think of it, I *haven't* rubbed off on you yet. Better add that to the list."

JC blushed and chuckled, then sat gently on the edge of the bed while he waited for Chris to finish his inspection, or whatever he was doing. "I won't forget that one," he murmured, unknotting his towel.

"Do you ever worry," asked Chris, moving closer to the bed and focusing on JC again, "that the moment you're in is all a dream or something. A big elaborate dream that you're going to wake up from at some point and be incredibly confused when you realize that none of it happened? I've done that before ... had a dream like that, that was just like life. I went around in a funk for days afterward because it hadn't been real. And since then I've always worried that it's happening to me again. "

JC's mouth dropped open a little. Even if Chris wasn't being completely blatant about what he was saying, JC could read between the lines. ANd it was just about the sweetest, most romantic thing anyone'd ever said to him.

"Um," he said quietly. "I'm not sure. What was the dream about?"

"The first one?" asked Chris, staring off somewhere just past JC, "Or the one I'm worried that I'm having right now?"

"The first one, baby," JC replied gently, reaching out his hand to try and get Chris to pay attention to him. He was still coming up with the right way to set Chris's mind at ease about what he was feeling right now.

Chris chuckled a bit, whatever had been pulling him into the distance somehow gone now. "The first one doesn't matter," he said. "The first one happened when I was, like, eighteen. I swear I dreamed a whole year of my life -- got myself a car and had a boyfriend for the first time and was in school -- but then I woke up and it hadn't happened. That doesn't matter at all. It's just what it did to me ... made me doubt reality sometimes." He finally looked at JC. "Especially when something really good happens to me."

JC stretched higher to cup his cheek, swallowing a little nervously. "And the one you're worried you're having now?"

"I met this guy," said Chris slowly. "Pretty cool, a little dorky like me. Hot as hell. Usually the kind of guy I watch from afar and never really find a excuse to talk to." He sat down heavily on the edge of the bed with JC, looking just a little bit past him again. "But it was different this time. We met and we got along and he was even cooler when I got to know him. And then he slept with me and suddenly it was like I had everything I wanted now. A friend, an equal, a lover. And ... now I'm scared I'm gonna wake up and find it gone."

"You know, I'm not sure they've ever documented cases of shared dreams," JC murmured quietly, not sure if he wanted Chris to look at him yet or not. "Shared hallucinations, okay -- remember the X-files with the mushrooms? -- but not dreams." He let his fingers drift to Chris's lips. "Chris ... I'm not sure what happened to the guy that was hot as hell, but if the rest of it's supposed to be me ... it's not going to go anywhere. I promise."

"Well, my first goal will have to be to convince you that you're hot as hell," said Chris, turning his head to look at him and resting a hand on JC's knee. "Which would make my second convincing myself that we're actually together. I'm used to people moving in and out of my life ... I'm not so used to people staying."

"Okay," JC said quietly, staring at Chris's hand. "But this is the type of thing you're not supposed to worry about yet, Chris. Yeah, we got really close, really fast, but it JUST happened. I want you to still be happy and reveling in us getting together, not worrying about me leaving. Not yet." He sighed. "ANd then convincing you I won't, that'll be MY first goal."

"I'm not worrying about it," said Chris, shaking his head. "Thinking about it, yeah, but hell ... I'm still getting hard right now so I can't be *that* worried about it. I think I mostly just want you to tell me that you and me are for real."

JC slowly tugged Chris's towel off too, and pressed him back down on the bed. "You're not dreaming this, baby," he whispered into his neck. "You did actually show up at the club last night, even if you didn't call me to tell me you'd be there, and you did actually come talk to me, and you did actually invite me to go elsewhere, which sneakily was your apartment. ANd because I haven't thought about anyone but you in weeks, we did actually have incredibly awesome sex. ANd again this morning. ANd then again this afternoon. And then AGAIN in my apartment, and you already know the significanece of that." He kissed him softly. "That's all real. Very real."

"Good," said Chris, rolling in closer to him. "Thank you. And the sex *is* awesome, yes, but that doesn't mean we don't need to keep practicing. I'm thinking we should practice a lot."

"Whatever you want, baby," JC smiled, nudging him back on his back. "Did that set your mind at ease, at all?" he asked quietly. "There are ... other things I can say, but ... maybe that was enough."

"I'm not going to stop you from saying other things," said Chris with a smile. "But if you're worried that *I'm* still worried? No. I'm over that little episode of doubt. I know that you're not going anywhere; you're too good with me for either of us to want to be anywhere but here."

"You looked really far away," JC admitted, stroking his damp hair away from his face. "When you were thinking about it. I know what I have in you, Chris. And I already told you I'm not letting you go." He closed his eyes. "Fuck. I'm so much worse than Joey and Justin. How did this *happen* to me?"

"I guess the longer you wait, the harder it hits you," mused Chris, running his fingers up and down JC's side. "Because this pretty much laid me flat, too. You don't see it coming, then it's right there, happening to you. The stuff you used to roll your eyes at in other people. But hell ... feels pretty good, doesn't it?"

"Silly good," JC agreed, giggling and flinching away from Chris's tickling. "But God, just ... if I ever tell you I have something I wrote that I want to show you? Just kill me. No mercy. I'm serious." He wrote songs sometimes, and awful poetry, and as much as he liked Chris, it didn't need to see the light of day ever.

Chris laughed and kissed him. "I absolutely will not," he said firmly. "I encourage any signs of creativity in a guy. Even if they're bad limericks about my toes. Which, for the record, I *have* written. Doesn't get much worse than that."

JC laughed too. "Well, we'll see." He pushed their wet towels off the bed, and brushed at Chris's hair again. "Thanks for taking the bath with me, baby. I'm still going to be so stiff tomorrow, you're going to have to pry me out of bed, though ... "

Chris gave him a confused look that was obviously put on. "Why would I want you out of bed?" he asked innocently as he began softly stroking JC's skin again.

"So I can make you breakfast, perhaps?" He teased back. "So we don't get completely ridiculed by Joey when he *does* get home? I could give you several reasons, babe." He stretched out luxuriously over the comforter. "All that means is that you should take advantage when you do have me in here, huh?"

"Of course, I've conveniently forgotten that we're going to have to get out for dinner. And if not for dinner then at the very least so that I can get a bit of work done tonight. Which I would do in bed if I could but it involves many tiny scraps of paper with Very Important Thigns on them that would likely get lost the first time you blew me while I was trying to read. So ... " Chris took a deep breath and grinned at him. "Since Joey is, I'm sure, going to mock you -- and probably me, too -- anyway ... let's not worry about any of it just yet. What do you want to do?"

JC shook his head, trying to process all that. "Um? You mean like right now?" He couldn't even remember what he'd wanted to do when they got in there. He knew he wanted to try a lot of different things with Chris, but a part of him still felt like he wanted it to be ... simple. Pure. The first time they did it in his bed.

"Yeah, I mean like right now," said Chris, eagerness creeping into his voice. "Like right at this moment, you and me. It's your home, JC. Your bed. Your choice."

JC glanced back at him, wondering how they'd gotten so close already that Chris could read him like that. "Well," he said slowly, trying not to blush, or stammer, because he didn't have *any* reason to be nervous. "Perhaps. Perhaps we'll just kiss some, and then ... perhaps ... if you feel like you want to? You can make love to me. Like, um ... slow."

"I think that sounds perfect," said Chris, leaning closer to kiss his throat. "I think that sonds like exactly what we both need. There wil be plenty of time for being adventurous -- I think we've assured one another of that now."

"Plenty of time, right," JC breathed, trembling a little at the way Chris's wet lips felt on his throat, right at the line of stubble there. "You sure you don't mind being inside me again? Not sick of it yet?"

"I will never, ever, be sick of that," insisted Chris, punctuating every word with a kiss. "Never. As long as you let me, I'll keep doing it, because there's nothing that makes me feel closer to you than being inside you."

"Okay," JC shivered again. "Um. The condoms and another thing of lotion are in the little table there, um. In case I get incoherent." He was beyond relieved that Chris hadn;t even reacted to JC calling it making love, and now just was letting himself anticipate Chris making him feel like he had been every time he'd touch him.

"Good to know," said Chris, lapping at his collarbone and seeming to be mesmerized by JC's throat. "Let's hope one of us manages to stay coherent or we aren't going to get very far. But hey ... " He licked up JC's other collarbone. " ... we seemed to have managed all right so far ... "

"Yeah, we do fine," JC agreed, arching his neck. "Um. But I can tell, I'm not ... I mean, I'm already not making much sense, and ... " He cut himself off before he could say something about how long it'd been since he actually made love. How long he thought it would *still* be, if you'd asked him the day before.

"We don't need to be talking to make sense," said Chris, gently rlling JC onto his stomach and then kissing him for a long, long time. "Sometimes things make more sense when you're not saying a word." Slowly he began kissing down JC's neck again, then his shoulder. "And since we're both so squeaky clean right now, I think i'd like to use my mouth on you for a while ... "

JC shuddered, remembering where Chris had put his mouth the night before, not quite sure he could handle it today. He squirmed until he had his erection in as comfortable a position as it was going to be, and grabbed a pillow. "I thought I was going to do that to you," he protested, but it was weak.

"Another time," said Chris, kissing down JC's back, tracing bits of skin with the tip of his tongue. "Stop me if you don't want to, okay? I'm pretty sure you know where I'm going ... "

"I'm not going to stop you," JC laughed wryly, biting the pillow. "God. I just ... didn't mean for you to spoil me."

"Maybe I should point out that I *like* doing this," said Chris, running the flat of his tongue over the small of JC's back. "And that by doing it, and often, I'm spoiling myself as much as I'm spoiling you."

"It's just," JC protested, squirming and burying his face in the pillow, "that I kind of can't help screaming. Um. And, like, usually coming too fast." His hips lifted off the bed as he arched toward Chris's mouth, and he groaned in embarrassment. "Uh. Way too fast."

"Well, the screaming's not a problem," said Chris, making a long stroke with his tongue on JC's left cheek, "and we already had sex a few times today, so the coming too fast shouldn't be a problem. But if you think it will be ... " He lay a similar tongue stroke along his right cheek, "then we can just let you come from this, and then I can make love to you afterwards, as slow as we want to."

"Fuck," JC jerked under Chris's attentions, biting the pillow. "Oh, god, Chris. I just ... oh. God." He figured that if it was Chris's intention to wear him out so he could work, that would probably do it. "You're going to kill me."

"Really looking forward to this," murmured Chris, laying a soft kiss on him. "I love the way you spread for me, so easily. I love to watch, when you do that, when you don't even know you're doing it. It's like an invitation." And it was an invitation that he accepted, spreading JC's cheeks gently with his hands and laying another soft kiss right *there*.

"Oh, Chris," JC whimpered, knowing he did, he *did* do that, spread like that. He just hoped Chris knew it was so much because of him. He rubbed a little against the soft material of the blankets, grunting in frsutration when it felt nothing like it had felt to rub against Chris's ass in the bath. "God. You do such *incredible* things to my body, I can't ... "

Chris didn't say anything at all, kissing and licking at him to begin with, moistening the already soft skin with his saliva. Then he began poking at him with just the tip of his tongue; it couldn't even be considered entering him, it was so shallow, but he could definitely feel it, feel Chris's tongue pulling at the edges, opening him up.

JC whimpered, clutching at his pillow. He hadn't even balked at Chris knowing he'd get off on this, one thing he was learning was that Chris was attentive, in bed, and so it wasn't surprising in the least that he'd figured as much. The awful thing was that he knew it wasn't teasing -- yet it was still torture.

Chris began licking at him again, with broader strokes this time, making every nerve ending he touched tingle. Just when he thought he really couldn't take that anymore, Chris began working his tongue deeper inside him, wiggling it and tugging it this way and that, making his way inside.

Groaning and gasping, JC spread his legs further apart, started slowly humping the bed. He felt Chris following the rocking motion of his ass, working with it and then against it in the maddeningly arrhythmic way he did when he fucked him. "Chris," he grunted. "Oh, Chris ... you're such a fucking GOD at that ... "

Chris still didn't answer him, not that JC really wanted him to because that would mean that he would have to stop what he was going. He began kneading JC's flesh with his fingertips now as he practically tongue-fucked him, twisting and turning and tugging at him with his tongue so that every nerve ending still tingled and sparked.

And just like JC feared, he came too soon, it was over too quickly. He screamed as he did, nonsense words and Chris's name as he spasmed around Chris's tongue, grabbing the pillow and then stopping before he muffled himself because Chris had all but said he wanted to hear him. And it was like he couldn't *stop* coming.

Chris pulled his tongue away and turned him over gently -- while JC was still coming, though Chris probably couldn't know that -- and began licking him clean on that side as well, starting with his stomach and hips and moving down from there.

JC shivered and threw an arm weakly over his eyes, taking deep breaths and clearing his throat. "Do you really like doing that?" he murmured quietly.

Chris didn't answer until JC had been licked completely clean, then crawled back up the bed so they could be side by side." You have to ask?" he said with a tiny pout. "You couldn't just tell?"

"Come closer," JC mumbled, then fumbled for Chris's groin. Exhaling audibly when he felt that Chris's erection hadn't gone anywhere. "You seemed like you liked it," he admitted. "I'm just making sure you're not faking, with me."

Chris looked stunned by the question. "Why would I do that?" he asked. "Why would I fake anything with you? I don't understand ... "

"You wouldn't," JC said, trying to make his voice soothing, struggling to sit up and rest his weight on his elbow. "YOU wouldn't. I'm just ... God, Chris can't you tell yet I'm not used to being spoiled like this? I guess ... this is *my* way of worrying if this could be real."

"Well, get used to it, then," said Chris, looking relieved as he snuggled in with him. "Because I really like doing that. Especially with you. And I would never, ever fake anything, not with you." He kissed JC's forehead tenderly. "I'd still like to make love to you, by the way, if you still want me to."

"Or lie to me?" JC pressed, shifting back on his back, ignoring the wet spot. "You won't do that either, will you?" Chris seemed honest to a fault, but this was the last step for JC. Sort of the last hurdle before he fell unrecoverably.

"I don't lie," said Chris softly. "Not to you, not to anyone." He pressed his face to JC's neck and wrapped one arm around him, holding him close, knowing without anything being said just exactly what JC wanted to feel. And was a little scared to.

"Okay," JC breathed, his voice hitching. "Okay. Then yes. I would very much like for you to make love to me, Chris." He kissed his ear, held still. "Wait, though. First? Tell me your middle name."

"What?" said Chris, startled for a moment. "It's Alan. Why? Does it make a difference? What's yours?"

"Scott," JC chuckled, stroking a shaky hand down Chris's back. "It doesn't make a difference, I just ... it felt like something one should know, if one was about to get made love to." He tried to smile sweetly. "You can tell me something else personal, instead, if you want, and I'll forget you told me if you think that's silly ... "

"It's sweet," said Chris, still holding him, stroking his side gently. "And we can wait a few minutes before we do this, let you recover. You look a little, you know ... spent."

"I'm sure I look a lot spent," JC chuckled. "You're really much too generous." He nuzzled against Chris comfortably. "Tell me, baby. Something else about you. When's your birthday."

"No birthdays," said Chris, giving him a frown. "Birthdays mean I get older." JC gave him a playfully pleading look, though, and Chris gave in far too easily. "October. And don't you dare remember it."

"Chris!" JC protested, picking his head up. "There's only, like, two weeks LEFT in October. When is it, come on." He wondered fleetingly if he hadn't missed it, if he'd have a chance to do something fun and nice and special for it.

"Seventeenth," said Chris quietly, almost as though he hoped JC wouldn't hear him, wouldn't put it all together.

"You asshole," JC stared at him. "Chris, you JERK. That was *yesterday*. Why didn't you ... why wouldn't you say something?" He was smiling, enough so that Chris would know he didn't mean the insults, but he still felt awful inside. And a little uncomfortable, too, in a way. Like maybe it had something to do with why Chris went out the night before.

"I don't really do birthdays," said Chris with an awkward shrug, making JC doubt what he was saying even though Chris had sworn he always told the trust. "No big deal. But I gotta tell you ... yesterday? Was about the best birthday I ever remember having. Thanks to you." He kissed JC so he couldn't speak right away. "And you can smack me for being cheesy ... but I got the only present that I wanted, even if you didn't know."

"I ... just wish you'd said something," JC murmured, only slightly mollified. "Like, even if it wasn't before I ... came up for coffee, then at least after. When we were in bed, or something. So I could've done something nice for you, today," he tried to explain. "I don't care if *you* don't do birthdays; they're a MAJOR deal at our place." He pouted a little. "And I make an incredible German Chocolate cake."

"I'll have to remember that for next year," murmured Chris. "Since I'm sure now that you're not going to forget about it, no matter what I say. You could, um ... celebrate now. If it would really make you that happy."

"But I don't have the stuff for it!" JC whined quietly. "Shit." He looked over at the pictures up on the wall. "Why didn't you tell me, really."

"Because I didn't think it was as important as us getting together," said Chris, so simply that JC couldn't help but believe him. "Because I didn't want you to think I had *any* other reason for being with you than just that ... that I wanted to be with you."

"But, baby," JC said softly, kissing his neck. "It was your brithday. I wouldn't have thought those things ... we've been talking on the phone, and meeting for a while. I would've known it wasn't just 'cause of that." He sighed. "I feel bad." "Please don't," said Chris, nuzzling him. "My birthday went better than I could have ever hoped. Acknowledging it couldn't have made it any better. It might even have made it worse. So no feeling bad, okay? It was perfect the way it was, with what we did."

"Okay," JC relented, reluctantly. "Okay, but just because it felt like a pretty perfect night to me, too." He blushed a little, remembering. "I know you must've thought I was so easy. Didn't you."

"Easy?" said Chris. "I've been wooing you for weeks. You aren't *that* easy. But fuck ... it's still so hot to watch you spread for me ... "

JC snorted even as he felt his dick twitch back to life. "Oh, 'still'? Well, I guess you have seen it more since last night than, like, the entire collection of my sexual partners from the rest of the year, combined." He really *was* a little worried that Chris thought he was too easy, but he wouldn't make Chris think he doubted him by asking again.

"Really?" said Chris, curling his whole body around JC's now, his erection pressing against JC's hip. "I thought you still ... you know, hooked up. Just didn't find anyone to stay with. Am I wrong?"

JC thought about it a minute; if it wasn't more, it was definitely close. But it was hard to think of other guys with Chris touching him like that. "Um. No, I do. I did. Just ... not a lot this year. Kinda ... tame this spring, after being in Germany ... "

"Would it be rude to ask how many?" asked Chris, then shook his head. "No, it probably is. And it doesn't matter anyway."

"This year, or in Germany?" JC asked, nudging him with his nose. He didn't mind Chris asking. As far as he was concerned, it was a good thing they both were so experienced. They knew what they liked.

"Either," said Chris, kissing wherever his lips landed. "I want to know everything about you."

JC shrugged and laid back. "Germany was pretty ... crazy," he admitted. "Joey figured out he was into guys while we were there, and so the two of us ... well. Went out. A lot." He smiled sheepishly. "So when we got back, I really worked hard in class, and losing weight, and ... still being there for him, and so it didn't leave a lot of time for guys. Seriously, only a handful." Shrugging again, he placed a possessive hand on Chris's ass. "Plus, I'm old enough and I've done it enough to realize that it's not worth doing if it's not worth doing well."

"Losing weight?" said Chris, not pushily, but like he was expecting an answer to something he hadn't expected to hear in the first place. "And I guess it's pretty easy to go crazy when you're so far away from home. Or with Joey. Or probably especially with Joey when he's just discovering something new ... he seems like the type to kinda face something head-on. Whenever you spend THAT much time on something, I guess something else kinda falls off."

"He didn't hesitate much," JC agreed, stretching out underneath Chris, smiling when it made their cocks rub together. "And so it was kinda a whole new world for him when we got back to school this spring. I didn't even try to keep up." He met his eyes. "And yes, losing weight. German beer, man. I was *round*."

"He seems to have settled down now, anyway. Well, not settled down maybe, but settled on one person to go wild with," said Chris, running his hands down JC's slim body. "And I really doubt you were round ... "

"Well, I was," JC said simply. "I lost almost twenty pounds this year." He curled into Chris's hands. "Joey's never had a boyfriend," he confided. "And Justin's never slept with anyone that *wasn't* a boyfriend, I don't think. They're a good match for each other."

"Twenty pounds," scoffed Chris, snorting. "You'd look just fine with twenty more pounds on you. But whatever. Joey seems very ... focused, on Justin. From what I've seen, anyway. *Very* focused on Justin."

JC smiled gently, trying to keep it from being patronizing. Chris would learn, eventually, that JC's weight was one of those things it just didn't make any difference to talk about. In the meantime, he was more intrigued by his impression of Joey and Justin. "What do you mean?"

"I mean you look fabulous to me no matter what," said Chris, but from his quirky smile JC knew that *Chris* knew that wasn't what he was asking. "Joey and Justin just kinda only have eyes for each other," he said. "It's very adorable and hot, in that makes-me-sick kinda way." He gave JC a wink and shook his head a little, still smiling. "You're right, they seem very good for each other."

JC cocked his head, still smiling even thought it was a little more strained. "Yeah," he said, prompting. "It ... kinda sounds like you're trying to remind *me* of that, or something, Chris. You ... you know I don't think Joey and I are going to, like, be together someday, right?" He wasn't sure if that's what Chris was skirting around, or what.

"I believed you when you told me that the first time," said Chris, kissing his cheek and caressing his skin with one hand. "I wasn't trying to remind you of anything. I was just commenting on what I see. Which I tend to do, a lot. Comment, I mean, not see. Though I see a lot, too."

JC burrowed back into the pillow, relaxing. "Good. Then yes, I agree with you. They're adorable and hot." He smiled devilishly. "Wanna know some more gossip about them?"

"Honey," said Chris, giving him a grin. "I never spread gossip but I *love* to hear it. Spill."

JC stuck out his tongue but took a deep breath to tell him anyway. "So, okay. Remember that night you met them, at the club? They still weren't really together then, Justin was just making a huge play that Joey was getting worse and worse at avoiding?" He waited for Chris to nod. "Well, they got together that weekend. But, um. They didn't sleep together -- like, fuck -- until like last week." He beamed. "Isn't that the cutest thing you've ever heard? Joey'd kill me if he knew I told you."

"You're *kidding* me," said Chris with wide eyes. "Those two? Didn't do it until last week? There's no way. They're all *over* each other."

"I know," JC nodded solemnly. "I *know*. I mean, they both had sore jaws every night, don't get me wrong, but yeah. Joey, I guess, felt like he had something to prove to Justin. And Justin I think realized it was something he had to prove to himself more, and so he let him." He grinned, remembering. "Although he did enlist my help to try and get Joey drunk once, so he'd just fuck him already."

Chris chuckled. "That's unbelievable. It's sweet as hell ... but I have to admit they have more will power than I do. Though ... if I had to just blow you and rim you all the time? I could live with that for a while ... "

"You are *not* doing that," JC glanced up, alarmed. "No. I love your dick way too much for that." He shook his head and closed his eyes at Chris's amused look. "Shut up. You can find some other way to prove your undying love."

"I'll do that," said Chris, "because I don't think forced abstinence would make either one of us very happy. Though I think I could keep you happy for maybe a few days with just my mouth ... " When JC looked at him again he waggled his eyebrows and licked his lips suggestively.

JC wasn't sure about that, but after what Chris had just done, he wasn't going to challenge him on it. And plus, he wasn't stupid -- they were naked and hard and a couple minutes from making love and he wasn't jeopardizing that for all the tea in China.

"Good thing we don't have to test it," he said instead, wrapping Chris up. "Chris. Please, baby ... we don't have to wait anymore ... "

Chris rocked his erection against JC's body. "How do you want to do it?" he asked tenderly, stroking JC's side again and watching him with eyes that were still a little wide. "What's your favorite way?"

"How you do it," JC mumbled. "Seriously, Chris, I just ... I trust you, okay? You're the first person I've had here, and what we did on the porch was just ... shoot, amazing, you know? I just want it slow."

"Slow," said Chris softly with a smile. "Okay. We can do that." He gently encouraged JC up onto his side and spooned up against his back. "This is a nice slow position," he said, his lips up against JC's ear, his chin on JC's shoulder. "And it has the added bonus of being one we haven't used before."

JC sighed and pulled the pillow against his chest, digging his chin into it as he let Chris coax his top leg up and on top of his. He could feel Chris's heart rabbiting against his shoulderblade, his breath on his neck, and his eyes started drifting shut. Knowing Chris would take care of things, of him.

"You didn't *really* want to know how many, did you?" he mumbled lazily.

"Doesn't matter how many," Chris assured him with a soft kiss to his neck. "I just want to know you." He rocked against JC for a few moments, but it wasn't lewdly, it was a gentle rocking motion that wasn't just to get Chris off. A few moments later he leaned away and reached back, presumably to get the condom and lotion that JC had pointed out to him.

"I'm not going to be too loose for it to feel good for you, am I?" asked JC, waiting for Chris to move up behind him again. He knew he was being kind of demanding, and a little pushy, and just wanted that one last bit of reassurance.

"No, of course not," said Chris, giving him another kiss to the neck as he moved in closer again. "Are you okay if I just go inside you again? Don't want to hurt you or anything."

"You won't hurt me," JC smiled, clutching the pillow tighter. "I like it. I mean, I like your fingers, too, and your tongue -- obviously -- but ... Chris. When I feel your dick, so hard for me, just pushing inside? Its heat being, like, the first thing I feel? It's just ... " He shivered, anticipating, and couldn't finish.

Chris waiting only a moment longer before doing just that, pushing inside him slowly but smoothly, and not actually stopping until he was all the way in. "Damn that feels good," he murmured, sinking his teeth lightly into JC's shoulder. "Definitely, definitely no worries ever about being too loose."

Shivering again, JC rocked back slowly against Chris's body and ran the arch of his foot down Chris's calf. "Okay, good," he sighed, keeping his eyes closed. Since he couldn't see him anyway. "Should there be worries about anything else?"

"I don't thinik there should be worries about anything," said Chris breathily, and JC could hear his breathing quicken just slightly as they began to move together. "Especially not just right now."

JC nodded and quieted, letting their bodies move together, letting Chris work him up slowly with his measured, steady strokes. He'd been right; the position was incredible for a languid, leisurely fuck, and he knew that when he finally did come from it, it was truly going to be a release.

"Feels so great," murmured Chris, sliding his hand around JC's waist and holding him so very tenderly. "Been so long since I've done it like this. And your body ... " His hand roamed JC's skins for a few long moments as he kissed and licked at JC's shoulder. "Turns me on so much.,"

"Does it," JC whispered softly, tilting his head back a little so Chris could rest his cheek on it. "I'm relieved." He knew he could protest, make a big deal about his body issues, but he *believed* Chris. Knew he meant it, from the way he touched him almost reverently.

"I hope," said Chris, his lips brushing JC's cheek, "that you already knew how much I love your body. I hope that's already been very clear to you." He didn't speak again after that, busying his mouth with JC's throat and still moving against him at that same pace, fucking him slowly and smoothly.

JC wondered at the heat that moved slowly through his body; born in his groin, pulsing in waves down his legs, and through his gut and up his spine until his head felt heavy. He tried to hold as still as he could, beyond using his body to cushion and meet Chris's thrusts, but he had to touch *something*. He grabbed the hand Chris was trailing over his stomach, and held onto it tightly.

"'S that good?" murmured Chris against his ear again, and JC thought he might have sped up but it was so fractionally that he couldn't be sure. "Nice to be holding you like this. I like holding, 'Specially when it's while I'm doing this, too ... "

"I remember," JC murmured, threading their fingers together and then closing his mouth tightly, not willing to make any more noise to disrupt what Chris was doing to him. But he *did* remember: Chris had surprised him, the night before, by holding him tightly in his chilly bedroom; compact limbs draped around him comfortably. He'd never have pegged Chris for a cuddler.

"So ... intimate," Chris murmured, almost too breathily to be heard. And this time JC was sure he sped up, but already they'd lasted longer than any of their previous times. Chris's strokes were still long and smooth and unlike the deep jabs and thrusts that they'd experienced together before, especially as they approached orgasm.

"Perfect," JC replied under his breath, drawing his leg up higher and bringing Chris's hand up to his lips, taking each knuckle into his mouth briefly and softly in wet, distracted kisses. Waiting for Chris to let him go.

":Yeah, perfect," agreed Chris as he held on tighter to JC's waist with his other arm, pushed into him harder and deeper and sucked on the flesh of JC's shoulder hard enough to leave a marsh. "So perfect."

JC grunted, felt tears well up in his eyes as he tried to force himself to shut up again. He was completely overcome with -- just like Chris had said -- how intimate this was, how *special* it was. To him, at least, even if Chris only felt it to a lesser degree. And he didn't want to end up saying anything, blurting anything out that he'd wish he hadn't admitted, later on.

"I'm glad this is with you," said Chris, sucking gently on his earlobe as his hips moved him in and out of JC's body. It seemeed his defenses were down almost as much as JC's were. "No one else makes me feel like this."

JC bit down on Chris's finger, more gently than he would've if it was his own lip or tongue, and hummed a little. He could feel his juices dripping off the end of his cock, he could tell he was about to come, but even with Chris being so open and unashamed with him he still couldn't say what he was forcing back down his throat.

"Gonna come soon," murmured Chris with a slight gasp, his fingers digging into JC's skin. "Just from this. Just *like* this. Jesus, JC ... "

JC nodded, biting his hand harder, and lifted his leg back so that Chris could get just that little bit deeper. He wanted him to come first this time, wanted to feel him release inside of him in a way that he hadn't yet because he had no self-control whatsoever. "Want you to," he whispered.

Chris moved inside him for a few more sronger, deeper strokes then inhaled sharply as he came, his head rolling back and his body going still and rigid. "Jesus, JC," he said again, a soft moan. It was a few moments later when he was able to lift his head and lay a small kiss on JC's throat, and begin to move his hips again in a pale imitation of what he'd been doing before.

It didn't matter much, though. Hearing Chris breathe his name like that as *he* came, knowing that it had felt that good for his lover, was really all JC needed. Moreso than any physical stimulation -- he'd had more than enough of that so far that day -- his was an orgasm born of mental, and emotional, stimulation.

He came quietly even though his hips were shaking terribly, his hands even spasming as they held Chris's fingers against his mouth.

"JC," Chris said again, finally letting go fo him and bringing up the hand that JC wasn't holding to gently smooth his hair. "Wow. Just .... wow. I hope it was worth the wait."

"I loved it," JC whispered right away. "Thank you. Thank you for doing it, Chris." He let go of Chris's other hand and clutched the pillow to his face, trying to make sure any traces of his unspilt tears were gone before he turned around to face him.

He really hadn't needed to bother though; Chris's eyes were a little watery, too, when he finally saw them. "I think it's possible I just had the most intimate sex of my life," he said with a lopsided smile, kissing the tip of JC's nose.

"Are you okay?" he breathed, closing his eyes. Not that he thought Chris would admit it if he wasn't, but not wanting to see him figure out how to answer either. "You don't have to say anything."

"I'm definitely something more than okay," said Chris right away, though, kissing his lips softly. Everything had been so soft, so tender, so different from the first few times they had done it where it had been hot and hard and needy. "Do you not *want* met to say anything?"

"I do, of course I do," JC replied, turning his head back to face the other wall, letting his leg slip off of Chris's. "I just ... can't. Myself. And so I didn't want you to feel like ... " He shrugged. "You needed to fill the void."

"Speaking of filling voids ... " murmured Chris, then slipped fully out of JC's body and took care of the condom and himself. "It's okay if you can't say anything right now," he assured him. "But if you do? Want to? I want to hear it."

But JC really couldn't. He wasn't scared of Chris, as much as he was still frightened of what was happening between them, he was just more nervous about himself. Messing up, maybe, and that's why he worked so hard to keep from saying something that was just too much while they were making love. JC wasn't weak, but he could be vulnerable, and he was too susceptible.

"Come back to me," he replied softly, instead.

Chris slipped his arms around JC again and rested his head in the hollow of JC's throat. "I didn't go anywhere," he said soothingly, and seemed to just know what JC needed. Or at least what JC was showing he needed. JC kept his eyes closed and curled instinctively into Chris's body, completely drained, wanting the comfort that Chris seemed willing to provide. "If I fall asleep," he murmured, "you can do your work. Just ... promise you'll wake me up if you need anything?"

"I'll stay with you as long as I can," promised Chris, petting his hair again. "Sleep if you need to, baby. You have nothing to worry about now."

He didn't even flinch at Chris calling him 'baby,' even though he didn't seem to do it as easily as JC. Which JC hoped meant something.

"Don't go home," he pleaded quietly, instead. Not sure if that's what Chris had meant when he said he'd stay as long as he could, but wanting to make certain.

"No," he assured him. "I'm not going home. The only place I might go is the kitchen to get some work done. And to raid the fridge. If there's nothing there, is it all right if I order in?"

JC rolled over to watch Chris carefully, knowing his eyes were huge right then. "There's leftovers, and stuff for sandwiches," he whispered. "And the menu for the Chinese place is by the phone. But Chris ... wake me up, okay? I don't want to sleep the evening away, if we could spend it together."

"I'll wake you up later," said Chris, kissing his forehead. "It's early yet. But don't worry, JC, okay? We have lots of time ahead of us."

JC knew that, he KNEW he knew that. But he still liked being told.

---

Joey put his ear to the door before slipping his key inside. JC was gonna kill him anyway, for coming home, but it would probably be less painful for everybody involved if he didn't walk in on him in the living room. He didn't hear anything, though, and figuring it was safe, he pushed open the door and ducked inside.

"Hey," he heard a voice say quietly, and jumped at the sound because it definitely was not JC's voice. He turned toward the kitchen, and what he saw confirmed it. "You're definitely not supposed to be here," Chris went on to say, staring Joey in the eye.

Joey could feel his mouth working soundlessly as he took in the sight in front of him: Chris was sitting at his kitchen table in his underwear, stacks of notecards spread around him like he owned the place, hair in disheveled spikes and a red scratch down his arm.

And he was right, but he wasn't going to have someone talk like that to him in his own house. Someone that wasn't JC, at least. "I think that's definitely not your business," he replied, but kept his voice low too.

Chris's eyes narrowed at him a little, but he shrugged. "JC will be disappointed," he said softly. "If he's ever disappointed around you, anyway. But he thought -- he told me -- that we'd be alone here tonight ... "

Joey had to remind himself that he *did* know Chris was going to be there, and he *did* promise JC that *he* wouldn't be. "Fucking Justin," he mumbled to himself, but he couldn't keep the smile from his face when he did.

"I'm not staying," he assured Chris out loud. "I just ... came to get something. Then you can go back to ... being alone," he sniffed, looking around the room exaggreatedly.

"He's asleep," said Chris, pointedly keeping his voice down. "I promised him I wouldn't leave, so I'm getting some work done here." He looked at Joey more closely for a moment. "Everything okay with you?"

"I'm fine," Joey waved off his concern, looking more closely at *Chris* when he said that JC was asleep. "Honestly. Justin left a book here that he needs. I really didn't mean to bother you." But he could go get it, and get out of his hair, without asking. "Um. Is he ... is JC okay?"

"Okay?" repeated Chris, looking like he was wondering why the heck Joey would ask *that*. "Yeah, he's great. Just, you know, exhausted." He looked down at himself, then up at Joey, and was finally smiling the tiniest bit. "If I'd known I'd be seeing anyone but JC, I'd've put something on."

"No worries," Joey replied loftily, but he definitely stared closer at Chris. Exhausted? It wasn't even dinnertime. "Okay. Well, I'll just go get that book, then ... "

Chris nodded at him, seeming to be completely unselfconscious about his state of undress even after bringing it up. "How's Justin?" he asked, startling Joey by being so ... friendly. Conversational.

Joey paused in making his way back to his bedroom. "Fine," he said quietly, looking down at his hands and then squinting back up at Chris. "He's, um. Great. Why do you ask?"

Chris shrugged again. "Just asking," he said. "Me and him have talked a few times. He's a good guy." Joey could hear only what was unspoken though, the *he* and Chris had never really talked.

Hesitating another minute, he looked over his shoulder down the hall and then walked back into the kitchen, joining Chris at the table. "Yes," he said slowly, in a way that might be threatening if either one of them wasn't completely aware of how infatuated Justin was with Joey. "He is. He's a forgetful little shit who's gonna get me in trouble with JC, but he's a good guy."

Chris smiled at him. "And you're totally crazy about him," he added, pushing away his things to make a clear spot in front of him where he proceeded to rest his elbow. "JC'll never know you were here," he said, "and you didn't interrupt anything anyway. Though if you had ... we probably wouldn't have noticed you'd been here at all."

Joey cocked his head at him, then returned the smile tentatively. "And that," he said quietly, "is none of *my* business. Except to say that JC's a Nazi about the no-sex-on-the-couch rule, and he better not be making an exception for you."

With that, it actually hit Joey that the rule had never applied to JC -- he'd never had a guy over. The reminder made his jaw drop a little.

"We didn't have sex on the couch," said Chris, meeting Joey's eyes. The implication -- if it hadn't been already by Chris's state of undress, among other things -- was clear; that they *had* had sex, but elsewhere in the apartment.

The thing was, he didn't know if *Chris* knew he was the first guy JC'd had over; and if he didn't, it sure as hell wasn't something *he* was going to spill.

"Glad to hear it," he said, fidgeting a little. "Is. Um. I mean, are you finding everything you need? Like, food and whatever?" He glanced at the table. "Highlighter?"

"We don't *actually* have to be this awkward," said Chris out of the blue, still staring into Joey's face. "I mean, we're going to see a lot of each other, we don't have to get stuck on small talk forever, right?"

Joey stared back at him, wondering how JC put up with that bluntness. Then wondering if maybe that wasn't one of the things he *liked* about Chris. "Fine," he said. "I was just trying to be a gracious host, since your other one is, I guess, fucked into unconsciousness." He was smiling, and it didn't come out nasty, but Chris was going to learn that *he* could be blunt too.

"We made love," said Chris quietly, the difference in his choice of words very obvious. "And I don't mind you playing the gracious host for me, but I'd rather work on the friend bit. I'm ... pretty good at making myself at home, really."

Joey smirked and glanced down at his underwear again, then met Chris's stare. "Okay, friends," he murmured. "Since ... what did you say earlier? we're going to see each other a lot." He leaned back in his chair, wondering what exactly Chris expected from him. Especially before he'd even gotten JC's take on what had happened.

"So what are you guys up to today?" Chris asked conversationally, and Joey envied the ease with which he was doing this, seeming to be unconcerned about what it was about or where it would take them. "Hope it didn't mess up your plans, when JC pretty much kicked you out on the street."

"Well, I owe him," Joey replied candidly. "And I'd do it anyway, because I haven't seen that boy smile that big in a year." He watched for Chris's reactions closely. "It's no big deal ... we *were* studying in the quad, and I was thinking of taking Justin to dinner 'cause I just finished grading his midterm. You?"

"And he gets a special treat when he does well?" teased Chris, looking positively giddy after hearing JC's reactions to *him*. "Me and JC ... I'm gonna wake him up when I'm done with this. Or when I'm sick of it, whichever comes first. Then ... " He gave Joey a grin. "I have absolutely no idea."

"Anything special you'd *like* to do?" Joey prompted, arching an eyebrow. "Or did you guys do all there is to be done, already?" His eyes canvassed the adjoining room and fell on the pile of clothing lying by the couch.

Chris cleared his throat politely, the first hint of embarassment Joey had gotten from him. "I'd *like* to have dinner with him," he said, "and maybe spend some more time in his bedroom afterwards. Trust me, Joey, we will *never* be able to do all there is to be done."

Joey stiffened a little, wondering if that was some sort of challenge, but Chris's face looked neutral. Which meant he just didn't understand what Chris meant. "He's that good?" he asked awkwardly. Awkward, because he knew as much as he could without having been there himself, but not sure how much Chris knew about *that* either.

"*We're that good," clarified Chris. He looked down for a moment, and when he looked up again all his insecurities are visible on his face for the first time, and Joey even got the feeling that he was one of the few people to see them, ever. "You're not going to take him away from me, are you?" he asked softly.

"Shit no," Joey replied quickly, but wasn't that exactly what he'd been thinking? That JC was his, had been his for so long, and there wasn't room for someone else in his life?

Which was just stupid, because. Justin.

"I kind of left my heart somewhere else," he reminded Chris. But he wasn't even sure how reassuring that would be. Because despite Justin, he probably could manage to keep JC away from Chris. If he wanted to.

Chris nodded. "You know what I mean," he said, looking down again. And he was right, Joey did. And when he realized just what Chris was worried about, he finally understood just how much Chris felt he had at stake, just talking to him,

"Just make him happy," Joey said softly, waiting for Chris to meet his eyes. "Okay? You do that, and you and me aren't going to have any problems." He tried a smile. "One diva is about all I can handle at once, I'm finding."

Chris looked up and smiled back. "I told him that I could fall in love with him and I meant it," he said, with absolute candor. "If things keep going they way they are between us, I will. It's almost a sure thing, now. So yeah ... all I want to do is keep him happy, Joey, and I'm doing the best I can."

That was way too much for Joey to process, especially coming from Chris and not Joey, so he just tried to keep the smile on his face. He was happy for them, he *was*, but it was still too much. When they'd just gotten together yesterday and JC barely *talked* about him before that.

"I'm sure you're doing great," he replied tentatively. "I mean, I guess you're putting up with talking to me for him, and not for your health."

Chris grinned at him and seemed to be bouncing back quickly. "I could have just let you get the book and leave," he pointed out. "No harm, no foul. Maybe it *is* healthy that I talk to you. Maybe it's healthy that you talk back, too. Did I freak you out?"

"Yes," Joey replied, blunt once again. "But JC deserves to have whatever he wants, and if that's you, then I can get over it." He sighed and looked away. "I feel like such a neanderthal, but you know I have to say it. If you hurt him, I'm going to fucking kill you."

"I'm sure that JC said the exact same thing to Justin," said Chris, still smiling at him, "so I'm not going to take that personally. JC is a great guy and I woudn't dream of hurting him, ever. Okay? I just want to ... be with him and make him giggle and stuff. I'm a dork. Does that make you feel any better?"

"I'm quite sure JC *didn't* say that to Justin," Joey disagreed, grinning despite himself. "That's not his style and you know it, even if the sentiment's there." Leaning back in his chair a little, he actually started to relax. "I just need to hear this from him, man," he said finally. "It's nothing personal."

"I wouldn't recommend waking him up just to ask," said Chris, not telling Joey anything he didn't already know. "I'm not even sure *I* want to go wake him up, and he asked me to. Guy sleeps like the dead ... but I guess you already knew that, huh?"

"Yeah, I'm pretty familiar," Joey said easily. "Just wait until winter when he gets a cold, man. And I didn't mean I wanted to hear it right now, just that ... you know. Eventually. Sometime when you're not around."

"You're assuming there'll be some time when I'm not around," teased Chris, but Joey knew that Chris would be going back to his own home sooner or later -- probably sooner -- just like Justin always did, and he would have plenty of opportunities to talk to JC. "So is that *when* he gets a cold, or *if*?"

"When," Joey repeated carefully, wondering what *that* was supposed to mean. "Just ... you know. He gets all stopped up and can't breathe and sleeps all restless and the *elbows* ... "

Chris made a face. "I'll have to keep him well fed and full of, like, orange juice, then. And cross my fingers." Joey was surprised that Chris hadn't reacted to how intimately Joey knew JC's sleeping habits, but then maybe JC had actually said something. "It's feed a cold, starve a fever, right? I can never remember."

"You're asking the wrong guy," Joey admitted. "If I knew, then I wouldn't have had the problems, I don't think." He rested his chin on his hand, sizing Chris up again. "Thinking of sticking around that long, then?"

"Not planning on going anywhere, if that's the same thing," said Chris, not quite challengingly, but close. "Did you expect me to be?"

"I'm just trying to figure you out, man," Joey replied, glad to see *something* make Chris defensive. "Trying to wrap my head around the reason you're in my kitchen doing homework like y'all have been dating for years, when JC didn't even know you cared until last night. If he even does now."

"He knows," said Chris, eyes narrowing a little again. "Do you think I would have slept with him, if he didn't? He's not random, Joey. We've been talking for weeks. He asked me to be here, even though he know I had to work on this tonight. He *knows*. And so do I."

"Hey," Joey said, holding up his hands. "I'm not doubting, and I ain't judging. And I'm not going to keep you from getting back to it." He looked at Chris a little more sympathetically. "Don't tell me you wouldn't be thinking the same thing, sitting where I am."

"You *are* doubting," said Chris with a frown that was more than half pout, probably in spite of him. "But if I was you ... I probably would be, too. Not knowing what I know. Not knowing what's happened or been said between me and JC since last night." The frown disappeared, but Chris still looked oddly serious. "Even if you don't know me, I think you know *JC* well enough to know that he wouldn't bring someone he didn't care about, who didn't care about him, back here with him."

Joey couldn't say anything to that, because of course Chris was right. And quite obviously knew JC well enough *himself* to know what that meant. "Indeed," he said softly, giving Chris a real smile for perhaps the first time since he walked in on him. "So are *you* doing okay, with everything?" He had no idea if Chris had anyone to talk to about it, and if being there for him was only going to mean good things for JC...

Chris smiled back, and Joey realized that Chris had been being open with him all along. "I'm a bit ovewhelmed," he said. "And a bit nervous and more than a bit excited. But overall? Yeah, ok. Very ok. Very, very ok."

"Well, that's ... good," Joey nodded, reminding himself that he had every right to act the way he had to Chris earlier, and didn't need to feel guilty about it just because their conversation had gotten easier once Chris had, in Joey's mind, proved himself worthy. "You like my boy, a little, then?"

"Yeah, kinda how you like Justin, 'a little'," said Chris with a grin that was becoming more and more casual and confident.

"You treating him right?" he went on. "Honestly? Doing the kind of things he likes?"

"God, I hope so," said Chris fervently. "I think so. There hasn't been anything we've done together -- and i'm not just talking about sex -- that we haven't both liked. That I know of."

Joey grinned at him. "HAVE you done anything, besides sex?" He really, *really* wanted to know just how much had happened, but he also knew he needed to wait for JC to get the details.

"We've talked," protested Chris mildly. "And spent some time today in the library, I'll have you know." He eyes twinkled just a bit when he said that, but Joey had no idea what that meant.

"Well ... good," Joey said, fidgeting. "And, um ... you're, like, being careful, right? Like ... protection and stuff?" He knew JC'd been doing this forever, but if he was half as smitten as Chris seemed like he was, then there was no telling what he'd let slip.

Chris laughed, but not meanly. "Every time," he assured him. "One time we almost didn't do it, because we weren't sure we had anything, so really, you have nothing to worry about." He paused for a moment. "Damn. That was too much information, wasn't it?"

Joey raised his eyebrows. "Which part? The fact that it meant you've obviously done it more than once, or the fact that it meant you did it somewhere that must not have been your place or here?" Joey froze as his words actually registered with him. "Wait. Since last *night*, you've already done it somewhere that wasn't here or there? Shit, man, do you guys come up for air ever??"

"Well, we're taking a break right now, obviously," said Chris with a smirk, his eyes darting toward the bedroom where JC still slept. "But, um, I'm willing to bet that anything else JC's gonna want to tell you himself ... "

"No, no, I know," Joey shook his head, eyes closed. "He is. And no offense, but I'll probably take it better from him, too." For a split-second he wondered if he'd done everything wrong with Justin, seeing how happy Chris seemed to be after falling in bed with JC right off the bad ... but only for a split-second. Then he knew the goofy smile that always appeared when he thought of his boyfriend was probably spreading across his face.

Chris was still smirking when Joey looked at him again. "Missing him already?" he said softly, and Joey knew he understood.

"None of *your* business," Joey replied, but it was affectionate. "On that note, though, I am going to sneak back there and get Jup's book. I'll, uh ... be seeing you around?"

"You'll definitely be seeing me around," said Chris with a nod of his head. "So I'm glad we got this chance to talk. Or whatever."

"I'll be nicer next time," Joey said awkwardly, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "Really. You just ... caught me off guard, and I thought I'd have a chance to talk to JC first ... "

"I understand," said Chris, sounding like he really did. "Do you want me to let him know we talked, or no?"

Joey blushed. "Um. I thought we decided there wasn't any reason he had to know I was here ... ?"

"There's not," said Chris. "Except ... we ended up talking more than I thought we would. And things were said. And it would be ... weird, if he didn't know, you know?"

Joey knew. "I'll tell him," he sighed. "I mean ... if you need to, you can, but just ... at least let him know I was going to. Is that cool?"

Chris nodded. "I'll let you, unless it comes up," he said. "Thanks. I ... wouldn't feel right about keeping things from him. Especially something that would make him happy, like you and me getting along."

"Mmm," Joey mumbled. "Hold on, okay?" He walked quickly down the hall, and grabbed Justin's book from where it had fallen under the bed the night before, before picking up a hat and making his way back out to where Chris had turned back to his notecards. "Look, I understand. I think ... well, it's obvious you do care about him, already. Is there anything I can do?"

"Do?" asked Chris, looking up at him again, glasses now perched on his nose but sliding down slightly. "Do, like what?"

"For you," Joey replied patiently, just as ready to retract the offer. "Or tell you, or fill you in, or set your mind at ease, or ... just. To help."

"I'll probably have questions," admitted Chris. "And I think it would be really great if you were there to answer them, when I do ... is that cool?"

"That's cool," Joey said, smiling again and holding out his hand over the table. "So, uh. Good luck, with waking him up."

Chris took his hand with a grin. "Thanks," he said. "Oh, one question ... um ... when do the two of you expect to be back for real?"

Chuckling, Joey turned toward the door. "It'll just be me, most likely ... and whenever you tell me to, man. How's that sound?"

"JC is expecting you in the morning, I think," he said, thinking back. "But I don't know if you were expecting to come back tonight. I mean, I don't know if you can stay at Justin's place or whatever. So I just wanted to make sure I knew, so you wouldn't find us in any kind of awkward position."

Joey laughed harder, then covered his mouth sheepishly when he remembered JC. "No, I wasn't planning on being back before tomorrow," Joey assured him. "Unless Justin decides to dump me because I took too long with his damned book. It'll be after breakfast. Does that work, Romeo?"

Chris chuckled himself, but his embarassment never reared its head again. "Works great for me," he said. "See you tomorrow, Joey."

Chris didn't even clean up when he got up from the table, just shoved a few things gingerly aside so he could come back to it later. Right now, though, he just needed to get away from it for a while, get away and go wake up the reason he was here in the first place He just hoped that JC hadn't been planning on using the table for dinner, because there was very little of it left to use at the moment.

He took his glasses off and set them on the table on top of a notebook, then stretched and popped a few joints before going back to JC's bedroom. Pushing the door open, he watched JC for a few moments, the way he had te blankets up to his chin and was all curled up under them -- definitely not the way he had left him. Finally he went over to the side of the bed and lay an hand on his shoulder.

"JC," he said softly. Too softly, obviously, because JC didn't even flinch. He rocked him a little bit with his hand and called out his name again, a little louder, before considering that it might take extreme measures to rouse him.

He was apparently dead to the world, his hair a beautiful mess on the pillow from drying after their bath, a lot of color still in his face and his still-swollen lips parted as he breathed through his mouth. Chris considered for a moment just stripping off his underwear and climbing in beside him, but he wanted to be able to look at him, talk to him. Get over the minor crisis of confidence that talking to Joey had caused.

He did lean in and kiss those lips, though, and even in his sleep JC was responsive to *that*. Then Chris shook him again, stil gently but hard enough to be sure it was felt. "JC," he said, right against his ear. "Time to get up and play with me."

JC's eyes blinked open slowly, then crinkled at the corners when he registered who was waking him up. "Hey, baby," he sighed, letting them drift shut again and burrowing deeper under the covers. "Missed you."

Now that JC was bordering on awake, Chris did crawl in with him. It was almost stiflingly warm, but to his surprise JC's body wasn't. "You did not such thing," he said, wrapping a leg around one of JC's. "You were sleeping. But *I* missed *you*."

"You didn't," JC protested, yawning and gathering Chris in his arms. "You were probably studying your little heart out, weren't you, and forgot I was even here."

"I was studying my little heart out," admitted Chris, kissing him once again once he'd stopped yawning. "But I never forgot you were here. Not once."

JC chuckled and pulled the blankets up over his head completely. "I thought for sure when I woke up that we'd be over the cheesy phase, at least," he said ruefully. "Or that *that* part had been a dream. But since that was just precious to me, what you just said, looks like I'm out of luck."

"I think we might need a bit more time to get over the cheesy phase," admitted Chris with a dramatic sigh. "You've given me a cheesy phase. Do you even *know* what you do to me, JC? I'm *cheesy*. Damn." He grinned and ducked under the covers himself, braving the heat to nuzzle up against JC again.

"Hey, baby," JC said again, blinking at Chris in the dark under the covers. "Time to get up, really? Did you think a little about what you wanted for dinner?" He was still curled into himself, in a ball, and Chris couldn't believe he wasn't way too hot for that.

"Nope, no thoughts about dinner, only thoughts about you and the peasantry. I *told* you that already." He reached out and rubbed JC's arms a little. "You cold?" he asked.

"No," JC said simply, but let Chris caress him more. "Just snuggling. Tell me what you thought about?" He ducked his head to kiss Chris's hands, smiling when their eyes met. Chris relaxed just seeing how relaxed *JC* was.

"I thought about the fact that we'd managed to exhaust you, which is just really cool," said Chris with a grin. "I thought about the ways I might wake you up. I thought about waking up with you tomorrow morning. I thought about how I'm gonna tell my mom about you. I thought about how you would have been a prime target for predators if you'd been out on the streets a couple hundred years ago. But, um, you can blame that one on the studying." He stopped long enough to kiss JC again. "Thought about what it was gonna feel like when you made love to me."

JC blinked at him. "Wow," he said breathily. "Um. That's quite a ... lot of things, babe." He squirmed against him and then tugged the blankets back down to their shoulders, and Chris could see just how *blue* his eyes were in the light from the sunset coming through the window. "You wanna talk about some of those things? Your mom? The, uh ... other stuff?"

"Sure," said Chris, blinking a few times even though the light was dimming. "But see? I told you I was thinking about you the whole time. Even when I was supposed to be thinking about other things." He leaned closer to JC and thought about what he might be wanting to hear, and whether he was trying to fish out the thing that might be bothering him. "Did you have any questions or something? Or anything you're worried about?"

"No, not *worried*," JC assured him, reaching behind his head to grab a pillow and pull it to his chest. "That's just ... I mean, do *you* want to talk about any of it? Any great epiphanies or anything? Here, let's ... I mean, start with the easy stuff. Why were you thinking about tomorrow morning, already? Did you not necessarily want to stay over tonight? DId you ... like, need to feed the cat?"

"Rocky has plenty of food," Chris assured him. "He knows how to break into the cupboard if he needs to. Smart cat. That's not why I was thinking about that at *all*, JC." He tried to pull JC closer to him again. "It wasn't the tomorrow thing, it was the waking up with you thing. I think that'll be really ... nice. To have you there, to have you be the first thing I see when I open my eyes."

"Okay," JC smiled. "Kinda like I just got to do. It was, um. Nice. But ... I mean, we're totally establishing a pattern. This is two nights in a row." *He* didn't look alarmed, though, and Chris wasn't going to worry until he did. "But that was an easier one. What about, uh, your mom?"

"Two days doesn't make a pattern," scoffed Chris, agreeing with him silently. "But it could ... if we wanted it to. Mom, though. I need to call Mom and tell her I found someone, finally. She worries about me."

"Why?" JC asked carefully, this time *he* was the one to reach out and try to bring them closer together. "Because of, um, your girlfriend?" Chris saw the worry in his face, but also saw the pride that must've been put there because Chris had admitted he wanted to talk about him.

"Yeah. And because she doesn't like that her baby boy is so miserably single. Not that I was miserable. She just thought I was. I'm her only boy so she gets protective like that sometimes. Gives her a break from being protective of my sisters, I guess." Chris smiled, thinking about his family and how much he figured they'd like JC. They'd be surprised, prrobably, because even though he'd brought a couple home before, they hadn't expected him to settle down with a guy. But it was JC, and he was different.

"You're so sweet," JC breathed, tugging Chris into a unexpected, deep kiss. "I'd be so honored to meet her. Them. And I'm sure she's not half as protective of your sisters as you are, is she?" He kissed him again. "*God*. I totally forget what it's like being with someone when you actually want to *know* this stuff about them."

"They're sisters," said Chris with a smile. "They need a big brother to protect them, by definition." He let JC kiss him a couple more times, basking in his eagerness. "So you never did really tell me when the last time was," he reminded him. "Speaking of knowing stuff about each other."

"What last time?" JC pulled back, looking honestly confused by the question.

"The last time you were with someone you wanted to know this stuff about," Chris said gently, hoping it wasn't something JC wouldn't want to talk about with him. He didn't want there to be ANYthing that JC didn't want to talk about with him.

"Oh!" JC blushed. "Oh. Well. It was. There was this guy, um, grad student. He was my ... TA, for a ... for one of my classes last spring. Spring a year ago, not this past semester. And so we ... last summer. Before I went to Germany." Chris couldn't believe how embarrassed he looked, wondered why. "It wasn't serious. I mean, it *was*, but ... it was easier to just leave it alone. Summer lovin', I guess." He closed his eyes. "Gave up a good internship, though, to stay here with him. *That* part sucked."

"Well, I guess it was serious enough for you to do that," mused Chris, touching JC's cheek. "You're blushing. How come? You think I'm gonna be upset that you were with people before me, or something? Or ... is it something else?"

"No, it's not that," JC said softly. "It just sounds cliche, even to me. Like, crush on the older, more experienced, fucking brilliant guy, even though *I* was experienced. And brilliant." He smiled self-depricatingly. "And I just ... didn't really let him say no, I guess. Even though, because of him, I learned that I don't want to get involved with someone that won't hit on me, first."

"Hurt you, huh?" said Chris quietly, knowing it was true, just not knowing in what *ways* it was true. "So it's a good thing I let you know how I felt then, huh? Good thing I didn't wait until you hit on me?"

"You'd have been waiting a while," JC admitted. "And ... he didn't really hurt me, Chris. Really. It never meant enough to him for me to really believe -- where it *matters* -- that it would last. I'm okay about it." He really did look comfortable with it, and like he'd said, more embarrassed than upset at the memory. "I know people that have been burned by love. I'm luckily not one of them."

"Yeah, it can be a bitch," said Chris knowingly. He hadn't so much been burned himself -- he'd been unlucky in love, but so had so many people -- but he knew people who had been. Like his mother, for one. "Stuff can hurt without being heartbreaking, though, you know? Especially when it's enough to change your patterns of behaviour. But we don't have to worry about that now."

"No, we don't," JC smiled easily, and Chris didn't regret having asked him about it. "So that's ... I mean, that leaves one more thing that you mentioned. Earlier. Which was ... do you not want me to make love to you, Chris? It's okay if you don't, really."

"I'm nervous about it," Chris admitted after a moment. He was always honest, there ws no question of that, but sometimes there *was* a question about just how much he would tell. Right now, when it came to sex with JC, he figured that not holding anything back could only make things better. "It's not something that's been really good for me before. But I think it *could* be, and I think if it's ever gonna be good for me, it'll be with you."

JC smiled, looking pleased at the faith Chris had put in him. "We can try sometime. Maybe when we've ... been together a little longer? I want you to trust me, Chris, and I think you *could* like it, but ... there's no rush. The stuff we already do is ... " His cheeks got pink. "Well. If it's all we ever do, I'm still the luckiest man in the world."

Chris nodded, a little in agreement and a little in relief. "Is it something *you* want?" he had to ask, unsure yet of just where all of JC's preferences lay. "Is it something you really enjoy?"

"Sometimes," JC said carefully, and Chris remembered him saying something along those lines earlier, but it was still too vague to mean anything. "I would love to share it with you, if it's something you want to try with me. But it's not ... it's different," he finished awkwardly, and Chris knew it was his way of telling him that he did, indeeed, have preferences.

"I'd guessed about you," said Chris, just as carefully, "that what we're already doing is what you like the most. Right?"

JC met his eyes. "So?" he said, a little challengingly, before ducking his head again. "I mean ... yeah, it is. If that's not something ... I mean, if you think you're going to get sick of me ... "

Chris chuckled gently as JC misunderstood him again. He may have said he hadn't been burned by love, but he certainly responded to things as though he had been. Then again, so did Chris, sometimes.

"My point," he said, kissing JC's hair, "is that we're doing what you like most. And we're doing what I like most. Which is a good thing. And I don't have to feel guilty that I'm depriving you of something you really, really want from me."

JC smiled softly and draped an arm across Chris's lower back. "Oh," he said, then fell silent again. "No, you're not depriving me. I'm quite ... satsified." He smirked as he rolled his hips against CHris's thigh. "I'm glad we fit together well."

"And I'm gonna assume you mean that in more ways than one," said Chris with a matching smirk, enjoying just letting JC start to come on to him. "Both the fitting together and the satisfied."

JC was precious as he did; Chris could already read him, read the signs, and see how tentative he was about propositioning him. "Well," he murmured, looking at Chris with naked hope, "I mean. Not *completely* satisfied. Not so satisfied that I forgot you said I could tie you up ... "

Chris was startled by that and worried that it showed; not that he had any objections at all, but it wasn't something he'd been expecting this soon. "I didn't want you to forget," said Chris with a smile. "That's why we were making a list."

"I forgot the other things, though," JC admitted, running a shaky hand down Chris's hip, then bringing it back up to push the covers off of them. "So it's not much of a list. And I know we were kinda thinking of me tying you up, and fucking you, but ... we could do other things, when you're, um. Restrained."

"I said you could, JC," said Chris softly, a little shaky that they were back to thi s again. But he'd said he would and they didn't *have* to wait until they'd been together longer. If it was what JC wanted, and it was starting to seem like maybe he wanted it more than he said. "It's just you'd need to be ... slow. And careful. And stuff."

"No, no," JC protested, blushing more fiercely. "No, I think we can ... wait. For that. Still. I just ... I do other things, you know," he tried to explain. "You're not the only one who can do a lot with his mouth ... "

Chris squirmed happily against him, imagining *that*, now. "If you're sure," he said, moving in to suck at JC's ear. "I think I could definitely go for that."

"Oh, I'm sure," JC replied, his breath hitching. "I'm hoping that I can get you to do some other things to me while you're still tied up, too." He reached for Chris's wrist, smiled as he wrapped thin fingers around it tightly. "Hmm?"

Chris licked his lips, his growing arousal unmistakable now, to him *or* to JC. "Depends on what you'd like me to do," he said, "and how well you tie me up."

"I'm an engineer," JC reminded him, smirking, and CHris laughed. "And an imaginative one at that, remember? I'd have to say you probably won't be untied until I want you to be." He reached a hand around to cup Chris's ass. "I promise not to use computer cable," he murmured.

"Good," said Chris. "It tends to cut off the circulation a little much, don't you find?" He *hadn't* ever been tied up with computer cable, but he had the bad habit of winding things around his fingers and wrists when he was bored and that was something that he'd once found lying around when he'd been on a computer. "Something softer would be nice ... if I get a say in it."

JC shrugged a shoulder unevenly, and didn't answer the question except to push Chris off of him with a little more strength than he'd expected. "We'll see," he smiled, and threw his legs over the side of the bed, arching and stretching when he stood and made his way to the closet.

Chris didn't move at all, looking forward to whatever JC was planning on doing to him. Whatever if was, he was pretty sure it was going to feel good. Everything with JC did. "I like silk, if that helps," he called out with a grin, not even expecting acknowledgment now.

JC laughed, bending over to dig on the floor of the closet. "I'm not sure I like what you're implying, that I necessarily have silk *anything* in here," he replied over his shoulder. "A-HA." He stood up and turned around, unthreading the belt from a thick terrycloth robe, shrugging again at Chris's curious look. "Joey and I stole 'em from this hotel we stayed at."

"Good," said Chris, staring. "I'd hate to think you went out and bought something like that on purpose. And hey ... wait a second ... *I* have silk, why shouldn't you?" There was no way. In hell. That JC owned nothing silk. And he was pretty sure there would be satin and velvet, too. Not much, but something.

"I just said I resented the assumption," JC sniffed, dropping the robe to the floor and snapping the belt between his hands. "You want to keep talking, or quit while you're ahead?" He looked very purposeful, and intent as he knelt back on the bed, and Chris would have bet his cat that JC wouldn't have been able to pull off a dominating expression. He would've lost.

"Damn," he said softly, and shut up as the game demanded. Not that he would be able to resist throwing in a comment from time to time ... because he just couldn't. Instead of talking right now, though, he lifted his arms and let JC have his way with him.

JC smiled, looking sweet as ever when he did, and trailed his hands up Chris's arms. "I'm not the only one that's easy, huh?" he prodded, nuzzling at Chris's throat as he pressed him down on his back on the bed, keeping his arms above his head. "I might like you like this, every once in a while."

"I never said I wasn't easy," Chris blurted out quietly, his eyes captured by JC's. He was trembling a little, not from fear, but from anticipation. And he was pretty sure JC knew *exactly* what it was.

"Well, either way," JC still smiled. "Complacency suits you." He took Chris's unprotesting hands in one of his, and pushed them up against the bedframe, using his teeth and his other hand to untangle the belt. "I'm just going to thread this through the frame and tie the ends around your wrists, okay?" he said softly, seriously, concentrating on his work above Chris's head. "Rather than tie your hands to the frame itself. That way you can move a little and your shoulders won't cramp. Hopefully."

Chris just nodded this time, and knew that would be enough. Knew that his willingness was saying more than his words could. It wasn't as though he let just anyone do this to him -- it took a *lot* of trust, which is something he didn't always have -- but he liked it. A lot.

JC nodded back, and smiled crookedly when he sat back to admire his work, he himself beautifully naked with an erection standing proud between his thighs. "You comfortable?" he murmured, kneeling up so his cock was right in front of Chris's face. "You might be there for a while."

Chris licked his lips and nodded again, moving his arms slightly to see how much movement he had. It was more than he'd been expecting, but less than a lot. Enough, certainly.

"I'm good," he said aloud, knowing tha this time it needed to be said.

"We'll see," JC sniffed, scooting back and tugging Chris's underwear off unceremoniously. "You okay with me doing this, really?" he murmured, licking at the newly-exposed skin of Chris's hipbone, his upper thighs. "I mean, licking you there?"

"Yes," said Chris, shivering slightly at the thought. "You can do anything ot me, JC. I trust you."

Slowly, intently, JC used his palms to part Chris's legs, his thumbs tickling at the creases of his thighs. When he ducked his head, he passed over his cock altogether, sucking gently on one of his balls instead. "Since we're doing this now," he murmured, "you have to come up with a new fantasy."

"Trust me," murmured Chris with a moan, really realizing now how much control JC had over his body. "I have no trouble at all coming up with fantasies. I just think that you're going to be in every one of them, from now on." "Good thing you can get me to do whatever you want," JC breathed, dipping his face lower to tongue at the spot behind Chris's balls, his nose still nudging at their soft skin. "You smell like sex, baby," he whispered, barely audibly. "Turns me on."

"No one," said Chris fervently, "is more turned on than me, right now." He tried not to move, tried to let JC be the one to move him, to get him to do anything he wanted to, but he couldn't help lifting his hips a little to make it easier tof JC to get at him.

JC chuckled and suddenly one of his fingers was resting against Chris's lips, gently pressing for entrance, as the fingers of his other hand helped keep Chris raised off the bed slightly. "I'd definitely fight you on that," he muttered, turning his head again to bite at Chris's hip.

Chris let JC's finger slip into his mouth, sucking on it desperately, tongueing it all over. He was so hard, and began to feel a warm flush going through his body; this was already doing more to him than he'd even imagined it would.

He felt JC inhale as he sucked on his finger, but then it was gone before he wanted it to be ... only to reappear where his mouth had been only minutes before. "I'm not ... not inside," JC whispered carefully, tracing delicately just outside of Chris's hole. "I'm not going to use my finger, baby. Just ... feeling you."

"It's okay if you do," said Chris, all in a rush of breath, then bit his lip and closed his eyes. He just wanted to feel this, because he *did* trust JC, and he knew it would stop any time he wanted it to. And right now he didn't want it to.

"Not today," JC quieted him, rubbing his belly gently with his other hand. Chris felt him move down between his legs again, felt his finger disappear only to be replaced by the hot, wet muscle of his tongue. "Today I'm doing this," he hummed, the vibrations of his voice coursing through Chris's skin.

"Oh my God," said Chris, his hips moving off the bed. He didn't even try and stop himself this time, and didn't think JC wanted him to. It had been a very long time since someone had done that for him. "Oh, JC ... wow ... " Then JC's tongue was inside him, actually *in* him, if just barely, and he pushed again against his hands. He heard JC grunt in amused frustration, then rub his palms down CHris's thighs until he could curl them under his knees and lift his legs. Spreading him open, taking away any leverage he had.

"Okay, okay," murmured Chris, his breathing rapid as he tried to suck in enough air to keep from getting dizzy. JC was taking full control now, and Chris was going to let him. "I'm yours."

JC's tongue dipped further inside, touching places that really hadn't been touched in so long, as the pressure on the back of Chris's thighs forced his hips even higher into the air. He'd jerk on the restraint, the material so soft that he could forget he was tied up, just wanted to touch JC and reassure himself he was there; that it was him licking and mouthing and tasting him so intimately.

"Say something," he said quietly, pressing his head back into the pillows and needing that reassurance however he could get it. "Please, JC, say something?"

He felt the motion stop, felt JC's tongue thrust once more inside of him before withdrawing completely. When he opened his eyes, he saw JC peering seriously about him from between his legs, his fingers stroking slightly at the inside of his knees. "Don't be afraid of me, baby ..." he whispered, sitting up a little more.

"I'm not, I'm not," said Chris quickly, breathily, worried now about what he might have just done. "I just needed to ... know. That it was you. Please ... don't stop?"

"You like it, then?" JC licked his lips, still staring at him solemnly, his eyes flicking up to Chris's wrists. "You like me, here, between your legs?"

Chris tried to push himself toward JC again but he wasn't able, JC was still holding him firmly. "Yes," he said finally, saying the words that JC wanted to hear. "Yeah, I like you there, between my legs ... "

"Okay, then," JC nodded, almost like it was to himself. He let one of Chris's legs down, then, and rubbed briefly at his stomach before letting go of the other too and pulling back completely. "Good. You look fucking hot, with me between your legs. I wanna do it again sometime."

"You're ... stopping?" said Chris in genuine confusion, watching him with wide eyes. "Just like that? Was .... was it something I said?" He began frowning, thinking about what he might have done to make him stop, wishing he'd never opened his mouth at all.

"Baby steps," JC smiled finally, stretching out alongside him on the bed, but very purposefully not touching him. "I want you to want it again. RIght now, though ... " he ran a single finger up the length of Chris's cock. "I want to see you between *my* legs."

"I do want it again," said Chris, his voice needy. "I want it again right *now*, JC." The idea of the moving on, though, was appealing as well.

JC smiled, let the finger trail down lower between his legs again. "You're tied up," he reminded him. "I'm not sure it matters what you want. Besides ... you don't like fucking me, any more?"

Chris moaned again. "Just ... anything," he said desperately. He would have been self-conscious about being so needy, but it was JC. "Just as long as it's you and me and I get to come, okay?"

JC chuckled again. "I'll fuck you with my tongue 'til you come some other time," he assured him, brushing past his hole teasingly and leaning in next to his ear. "Cause right now I want to ride you and ... there's not a hell of a lot you can do to stop me."

"Now who's torturing who?" he asked in a low, growly voice. "Don't make me beg. I just ... want you."

"Bad?" JC asked lightly, leaning over to bite at the sensitive, exposed skin on the inside of Chris's upper arm, rubbing his erection purposefully against his hip.

"Yes, bad!" Chris practically shouted, able to push up against JC again and doing it as hard as possible. "Jesus, JC, you're killing me here. And I know you know it."

JC looked at him with slight surprise, like maybe he *hadn't* intended on being such a tease, and rolled quickly off the edge of the bed to grab another condom and the lotion from where they'd left it. "Don't hurt your arms," he murmured, nodding his head at where Chris was straining against the ties.

Chris took a couple of deep breaths and relaxed. He'd known all along that JC wouldn't neglect him, but there was something about being tied up that made him so, so needy. "I'm good," he said quietly. "I'm fine. Just ... wanting you."

"I'm right here, baby," he assured him, straddling his legs and squirting some lotion onto his fingers. "I'd never leave you hanging, no matter what. I promise." He arched an eyebrow. "Can you look at me?"

Chris looked, watched the way JC was poising himself over his body, got even harder. "I know that," he said, squirming. "That doesn't mean I don't ache for you anyway."

JC smiled slightly, then let his own eyes drift closed. "The problem," he sighed, as Chris's own eyes grew larger at where his fingers were going, "is that with your hands tied up, there's some things I have to do myself."

Chris had already mentioned that he liked to watch and knew he didn't need to repeat it. So he just let his breathing quicken as he stared at JC. He couldn't tear his eyes away if he tried ... and he didn't try.

"I'm sure you'll, um, handle it."

"I like it better when you do it," JC admitted, tilting his hips foreward so he could reach between his legs, opening his eyes again and watching Chris carefully. He groaned as he breached his own body, and Chris swallowed to see the way he slid two of his fingers all the way in, no hesitation.

"Yeah ... but that's so fucking hot," murmured Chris, his breath hitching. "You have no idea what that's doing to me ... " Though JC probably did have an idea. All he had to do was look.

JC shook his head, but he still was moaning quietly. "Here," he said finally, picking the foil package up and holding it up to Chris's mouth. Chris caught the edge between his teeth, and JC used his free hand to tear it open and pull the condom out, slipping it on him easily and capably with one hand.

Chris closed his eyes again for a moment and took another couple of deep breaths. He didn't keep them closed, because what he wanted more than anything right now was to watch JC sink onto his body, watch the look on his face as Chris entered him.

JC whimpered as he pulled his fingers out of his body to squeeze some more lotion on his other hand, slicking Chris up quickly and then gasping as he thrust his fingers back inside his opening more abruptly than he had the first time.

His mouth was parted, his own breathing ragged, as he seemed to be holding himself open to descend upon Chris's cock.

Chris held his eyes open, even though the sensations -- both physical and emotional -- were making him want to squeeze them shut in a futile effort to try and regain control. He tried to reach out for him again and all but wrenched his shoulder, forgetting that he couldn't touch, he could only feel. And watch.

JC slipped further up on his hips, and took a deep breath of his own before sinking down. Chris could feel his thin fngers grasp the base of his cock to hold him still, felt the other fingers that impeded his entrance even as they helped position him.

"Oh, God, Chris," JC breathed. "This feels so perfect, every time."

"Yeah," breathed Chris, leaning forward as far as he could as JC began to lower himself onto his body, his eyes still shockingly wide open. "JC ... Jesus ... still killing me, I want you so bad ... " He wasn't even joking around this time, like he usually did during sex, it was blowing his mind so hard.

"I'm getting there, baby," JC gritted out, and it actually looked like it was a little bit of a struggle to force himself all the way down to the hilt. Once he had, he moved both hands away from their groins, and started rubbing Chris's shoulders. And otherwise, just stayed still.

Chris could hear his own breathing echoing in his hears, swore he could hear the blood rushing through his body. "Good God," he said, moaning without holding anything back. He wanted JC to move, but he also wanted him to keep touching the way he was. So he just stayed silent and let JC do what he would.

He felt JC's body tense around him as he seemed to make preparations to pull up, but he still didn't move. "This is going to go fast," he muttered. "You look desperate, Chris, and it's got me so fucking turned on ... "

"I *am* desperate," said Chris with another moan. It was like he couldn't stop; every time he opened his mouth another unanticipated sound just came out. "Fast is okay. Fast is good, sometimes."

Holding on to Chris's ribs tightly, Chris could only watch as JC drew himself up, and then slammed back down agaisnt Chris's hips, making them both cry out. He thought for sure that had to hurt him; he had to be raw and achy and bruised already. But he just did it again.

He could only breath in harsh gasps now, he was so close to the edge. He would last longer if he could close his eyes ... but he found that was no longer an option. He couldn't close his eyes, or turn his head, or even look at anything other than JC riding his body. "Jesus," he murmured again, another sound escaping, and couldn't think of anything else to say.

JC groaned again, his hands flitting around Chris's body: holding on to his hips, then his ribs again, then cupping him behind his shoulders. "Oh, God," he moaned, rocking up and down, still harder and rougher than they'd done any time Chris had been on top of him or behind him. "Oh, God ... I'm ... say it doesn't hurt, baby ... "

"Hurt?" said Chris, gasping. "No ... God no ... give me everything you can take ... everything that doesn't hurt *you* ... " If it wasn't hurting JC, Chris would do it, no hesitation, not anymore.

"Pick your legs up," JC gasped, clutching at Chris's bicep. "Just ... " he reached behind him with his other hand to try and position Chris's knees like he wanted them, then just kept the hand there, braced on Chris's leg, as he thrust their hips together over and over.

Chris knew that he could explode inside him at any moment, *would* explode inside him within moments. He didn't even try to hold back for once, letting JC drive him closer and closer to orgasm. He tugged with his arms again, as though all of a sudden he could magically use them, and felt a second flash of pain to remind him that this was all JC.

JC saw it, and let out a short burst of laughter before leaning back at a dangerous angle. "Oh God, oh God -- OH," he cried, and Chris barely had time to be worried that that had finally hurt when we felt JC coming all around him, over him, on top of him.

The fluttering of muscles around him was more than enough to send him over the edge; in fact, he would have come right about now even without it. With that added stimulation, though, the orgasm spread from his groin and hit his brain, in that spot behind his eyes that made him see stars and flashing colors all around him.

"Oh, fuck, JC ... " he moaned and wished he could grab on and hold him tight. But not being able to do that had helped give him one of the most powerful orgasms he could remember, so he couldn't complain.

JC slumped against Chris's chest, smearing his juices between them and groping wearily for the ties around the bedframe. "God. I'm *so* worried you're going to think this is all I want you for ," he muttered, his fingers working blindly.

"I already know better," said Chris, struggling not to strain his wrists as JC untied him. "We wouldn't be where we are right now if I didn't. I wouldn't trust you enough." It was only because of the things he knew about JC, the many things he'd learned about him before they'd started dating and the more intimate things he'd learned in the last day, that he was able to do that. Like he'd said, it never would have happened with just anyone.

"Thank you for trusting me," JC sighed, kissing his chest gently, still fumbling with the belt. "I ... liked that. I liked seeing you want me like that. But I missed having your hands on me, baby."

"So did I," admitted Chris. "But there were other things that ... well, made it worthwhile." He did struggle a little, then, impatient to be free and able to touch JC the way he wanted to. "Jesus I was desperate for you. I was going crazy."

"I wasn't being a tease on purpose, not really," JC said again. Reluctantly, like he didn't want to hear it if Chris thought he had been. He picked up his head and finally got one of Chris's wrists freed, stretching up to kiss it gently before Chris could even move it. "As long as you liked it, a little."

As soon as he could, Chris slipped an arm around JC and held him close. "It was great," he said. "You weren't a tease. You just made everything, you know, that much more *intense*. It blew my mind, JC, I mean that."

"Thank you," JC said softly, threading the belt through the bed frame so that he could let Chris's other arm down, at least, to untie it. "Me too. I just ... all the stuff we talked about beforehand, even if it wasnt all sexy stuff, kinda got me worked up. I'm sorry if you're hungry and really just wanted to wake me up for dinner."

"Stop apologzing," said Chris with a grin, finally able to kiss him again. "It was great. And I wouldn't have gotten into bed with you if I had just wanted to get up for dinner. I might not have been expecting it ... but do I have to be? Sometimes the best stuff is a surprise." He relaxed as JC finally unknotted his other wrist.

"You're very smart," JC smiled, kissing him back. "And I'll stop saying I'm sorry. 'Cause I'm not; I liked it. And now I'm all sated enough to actually take the time to cook for you, if you want."

Chris laughed happily, at the offer and at the general relaxation he saw in JC's face. "Well, I've certainly worked up an appetite, anyway," he said, very happy to be able to wrap both arms around JC now. "So did I really satisfy you that time?"

"You have to ask?" JC replied incredulously, his voice muffled in Chris's neck. "I come so hard, with you, baby. *Every* time. My body just ... I don't know. *Responds* to you, you know?" He kissed him softly. "Kind of scary, too."

"Scary how?" asked Chris, lowering his voice a little. He did want to know what that meant, and whether 'scary' meant the same things to Chris as it did to him. "Funny scary? Or ... honest scary?"

"Just ... " JC pursed his lips. "Scary. Like how this whole thing with us is scary. Scary that it seems too good to be true, that we can like each other as people so much and then find out that we're perfectly compatible in bed. Like, 100%, right away."

"It *is* scary," agreed Chris, half relieved that they were in the same place and half sorry that JC was having these uncertain feelings too. "But it would be scarier if it hadn't already taken me over 25 years to find it. Maybe we've earned something as good as this, huh? Maybe we've already done our time in half-assed relationships."

"Okay," JC nodded, looking slightly reassured. "You're right. I mean ... Joey was able to find someone, to overcome a lot more to be with that person. I don't have any reason to be scared." He kissed Chris's mouth softly. "I just ... will it make it worse if I say I want this to work, in my gut?" "I'm very happy to hear you say that," said Chris, kissing him back, more firmly. "I'd hate to think I was the only one. And I mean ... it's all right to be scared. I agree it's a big scary. But it's mostly a good kind of scary, where you don't know where things are gonna go or what they're gonna be like or how your life is gonna change ... but you know THAT something's gonna happen and it's something to look forward to." He kissed him again. "I'm not scared you're going to disappear anymore."

"I'm not," JC replied firmly, seeming to think that would reassure *him*. "And ... I mean, unless you tell me otherwise, I'm just going to keep moving forward with this, okay?" He closed his eyes. "I think, earlier, I was taken aback by the stuff you were saying. But now I think I figured out it's more that I didn't *expect* to hear it, not that it *bothered* me."

"You didn't expect to hear it because of how you thought of me? Or because of how it's been with people before?" asked Chris, still curious about where everything stood, even though he at least knew now that JC was feeling much the same was as he was about the whole thing. Which was just a huge, huge relief.

"Yes," JC replied, and giggled as he squirmed in Chris's arms. "Both, a little. Just like ... it didn't seem like something you're *supposed* to say, so soon," he explained bashfully. "And that freaked me out until I realized it was how *I* felt, too." He kissed him again. "You mad at me, baby?"

"No, of course not," said Chris softly, a little concerned again even though JC was telling him flat out that he felt the same. "Are you sorry I said it? Because ... I'm not. I meant it. It didn't mean that it was like that, yet, just that ... it could be. Because of who you are and who I am and how we are together."

"I *know*," JC murmured, a little more passionately. "God. I *know*, Chris. Don't think I've forgotten I said it too, out on the balcony." He looked up again, lips drawn together. "Would it help?" he asked quietly, dropping his eyes. "To tell you what I *couldn't* say earlier?"

"Yeah, I think it would," said Chris, wrapping his whole body around JC's now even though JC was taller; it didn't matter when they were in bed. It made him feel comforted and he hoped maybe it did the same for JC. "Because I want to hear and know everything. Especially the stuff that's relevant to us."

"Okay," JC sighed, sounding like he was convincing himself he could do whatever he was about to do. "So. I said earlier that you were the kind of guy I could fall in love with, too," he began, trailing his fingers over Chris's collarbone. "You said that first, though; and even though I meant them, those were your words. What I wanted to tell *you* ... is that I am." He looked up, his blue eyes scared but clear. "I've started, I mean. Falling."

Chris nodded slowly, the words startling him more than he showed. He hadn't expect that to happen between them for a while, not until they'd been together for more than a day or two, but JC wasn't the only one that needed to admit that it was happening. They may not have intended it to, may have had every intention of taking it slow and seeing where it took them, but they weren't slow people, not with each other,

"I know how you feel," he said finally. "And yeah, that's a kind of scary thing to realize, too. I've never ... it's never happened like this before, for me. And I'm thinking it's never hapened like this before for you, either ... "

Sighing again, JC closed his eyes and dropped his forehead to Chris's chest. "No. And ... thank you for understanding. It means a lot." He shivered a little. "Ready to get up?"

"Not really," admitted Chris with a grin. "But I should. I ache and I need to stretch out a little or I'm gonna be a miserable wretch tonight." He ran his hands up JC's back and hoped that it was something he'd be able to do again and again for a very long time.

---

JC kept looking at the door as he cleaned up the kitchen, as though Chris would come back through any moment now. Even though he knew he wouldn't. Even though he knew Chris wouldn't be calling until that afternoon, after he'd showered and done some more work and fed that cat. Still, he couldn't help but look and nurture that tiny little hope that he'd see him again sooner than that night.

So he jumped a little despite himself when the door opened, then forced himself to smile when he saw Joey peek his head in tentatively. And it occured to JC how far he'd come, that Joey wasn't the first person he'd have wanted to see.

"Is it safe?" Joey called out in a stage whisper, grinning when he had to see that JC was very alone.

"Quite," said JC with a dramatic sigh. "I'm all by my lonesome once again." He turned back to the counter he was clearing off, knowing without having to think about it that Joey would come to him. "So how was the evening with Justin? Any new adventures to tell me about? Any new positions you're gonna tell me I just *have* to try, forgetting that I'd probably done them before you even discovered boys?" He turned his head to give Joey a quick grin after that one, and watched him approach.

Joey returned the grin, looking more knowing than he should've. "No, no. I think I ... have decided to concede to your superior ... whatever, when it comes to gay sex." He brushed past him, grabbing the orange juice out of the fridge. "Justin says hi, though."

"I hope you told him hi back," said JC, grabbing a glass and shoving it in Joey's direction. Even if he wasn't planning on using it. "He didn't come back with you? I'd figured on seeing him around today." Joey hadn't asked, even though if JC knew him he was itching to do it, and so he didn't say anything about his own evening yet.

"I told him hi," Joey replied vaguely, then proceded to drink straight from the carton like JC expected he might. "I have to finish grading those exams, and I don't think it's fair for him to be around when I do it. He'll be here tonight." He paused. "Uh. Maybe. Unless ... ?"

JC paused for a moment, shoving the glass at him again insistently. "Well yeah," he admitted finally, not willing to give up his evening with Chris. "But ... it's not like they're gonna scratch each other's eyes out or anything. We do both live here, and ... " He shrugged and looked at Joey, wondering how *he* felt about it.

Joey grinned and shoved the glass back. "I ain't trading, I'll just say that right now," he teased. "So. Does that mean that your boy'll be back here too, then, I assume?"

"Yeah, he's coming back tonight," said JC, grabbing the cloth that was hanging over the tap and wiping the counter, looking away to hide his expression from Joey. If anyone could read it and know what he was thinking, it was going to be him. "He just had some stuff he needed to get done today is all. Back to the library and working on his computer some. You know."

"Mmm," Joey murmured non-committally, moving up behind JC and wrapping his arms around him, covering his hands with his own. "You could probably find something to do at the library, if you miss him so bad."

JC chuckled softly to himself; Joey apparently didn't even need to look anymore. "I never said I missed him so bad," he protested softly, and it wasn't really a protest at all. "And I'm not gonna go chasing after him like I'm some lovesick kid. He said he'd call this afternoon when he was done, and he will."

"Okay," replied Joey, his voice soothing and not teasing like it so easily could've been. "I'm sure it was hard for him to leave, too," he said carefully. "It ... seems like you're very comfortable, with each other."

JC chuckled again, turning around so he was facing Joey, and Joey's arms had him trapped against the counter. "You haven't even seen us together, honey. Not really," he said. "Don't you think it's a little early to be reassuring me like that? Not that i'm minding it, not one bit."

Joey turned an interesting shade of pink, and wouldn't meet JC's eyes. "Well. Just because I haven't seen you *together*, doesn't mean I don't know the two of you are comfortable with each other," he stammered. "Maybe I just sense these things."

JC grinned at him and ducked his head to try and find Joey's eyes. "About me? I don't doubt it. You could probably sense things about me when you were still over at Justin's place, you know me so damn well. But that's not what you meant ... is it?"

"Um," Joey stammered some more. "Well. It's just that when you've only been seeing someone for a day, but they'll sit in your kitchen and do work while you nap ... I dunno. Seems comfortable to *me*."

It was JC's turn to flush a little, but he also smiled happily just thinking about it. "Was wondering when you'd get around to admitting that you'd showed up here after *promising* you wouldn't," he said, more teasing than angry with him. It could have been worse, though -- he could have shown up and seen a lot more than he had.

"He told you," Joey breathed. "Well. I'm *sorry*, but Justin left a book here that he needed, and ... come on. If you had to choose between having me a little miffed at you, and not getting laid all night, what would *you* do?"

JC poked him in the stomach. "You were *supposed* to make sure you had everything you needed," he reminded him. But he knew Joey wasn't going to take him too seriously when he was still smiling. "So yes, Chris told me you stopped by while I was napping to pick something up. Jerk. Call first next time so you know what you might be interrupting."

"Well," Joey exhaled. "It all worked out just fine, so no sense crying over it now." He leaned over to kiss JC's cheek. "But I'll think about calling first next time. Now. Wanna tell me about it, hot stuff? Chris was too much of a ... gentleman."

"Gentleman?" snickered JC before he could stop himself. Things had been sweet and hot and ... hot, but there wasn't much 'gentlemanly' going on. "Well ... good for him. And shame on you for asking him!"

"I *didn't* ask!" Joey protested, blustering. "He just didn't ... volunteer, either. Except to somewhat resemble the cat that got the canary when he ... insinuated why you were so exhausted." He cleared his throat pointedly. "Come on. You *know* you want to tell me. Why are you playing this game with me?"

"I'm just saying," said JC with a smile and a shake of his head, amused by Joey's frustration. They had this conversation often, but they were usually on opposite sides of it. "If you want to know the details, you know enough to come straight to me. I'll always tell you." He nudged Joey's shin with his foot, playfully caressing the skin as he did. "Want to sit down first?"

"Well, I *am* coming straight to you," Joey sulked, picking JC up easily and carrying him against his hip into the living room and dumping him on the couch. "I like Chris, by the way. In case you care."

JC bit his lip before smiling again. "Thanks," he said quietly. "I do. And I *know* you already know that." When Joey sat down he tucked his feet up under Joey's leg. "So where do you want me to start? I'm out of practice at this 'spilling my sexual exploits' stuff."

"Like riding a bike, babe," Joey grinned. "It'll come back to you. Why don't you tell me about Thursday, since I didn't even know y'all were meeting at the club until I got that page you left me."

"He just showed up," said JC innocently. "I had no idea he was going to be there this time, we didn't have plans or anything. But, um, he came by to see me, I guess ... " Which was just one of the most flattering things, when he thought about it. "And things happened." He looked up at Joey with a sheepish grin. "I think I just feel off the bike. Want me to try again?"

"Yes," Joey said slowly, rolling his eyes. "Dude, you *suck* at this. I mean, I knew you kind of had a thing for him, but how come you decided to spend the night? I mean, he put the moves on better than you thought?"

"Something like that," said JC, realizing he had no idea how to put it into words. "Will I sound like a sucker if I say it just felt right, to do it? I don't know what it is about him, Joey, but he just ... fascinates me. He draws me. He brings things out in me that I wasn't even sure were there ... " He leaned forward and buried his face in Joey's shoulder. "Well, fuck."

He felt Joey freeze against him, then wrap his arms around his back in a huge bear hug. "Hey," he breathed into his hair. "Hey, Jace. It's okay, man. It's ... whatever you're feeling, it's okay. He likes you, man. A lot. What's wrong, big guy?"

"Don't let me fuck this up, all right?" he said, looking at Joey again. "I gave that to you, no matter what it took, and now you gotta give that to me, all right? Because this guy ... Chris? He could be the one, Joey. It's ... everything's different, with him. Different than it's ever been before."

"JC," Joey said clumsily, biting his lip. "I'll be there for you however I can. I just think ... you don't need to worry. Not from his end, not from yours. You think I don't know what it took, what it meant to let him stay here last night? No matter what you did or didn't do, I know that much. How do you think you're going to fuck it up?"

"I don't know," said JC, shaking his head because he couldn't put an actual act to that fear. "I'm just worried that I will. Because ... I *have* been lonely and with him I'm not lonely anymore. Not even a little bit. And you have Justin now and ... well, you know." Except Joey *didn't* know, because JC was being as inarticulate about the whole thing as he'd feared he'd be.

Sure enough, Joey's brow furrowed. "What's this have to do with me and Justin?" he asked slowly. "That's not ... not *why*, is it?" He pulled JC closer to him, reclining back on the sofa. "I love you, JC."

"No, no, no," said JC. "That's not *why*. You know me better than that, honey. It's just ... " He sighed and thought about how to say what he wanted to say. "It reminded me that I could have that, too, if I looked. Which yes, I know, you've told me a hundred times. But that really sealed it, when you had someone else and I didn't. Chris had already started happening before that, you know, and it kinda pushed me to see where it might go. And I'm *very* glad I did."

"Me too," Joey said quietly. "Me too, JC. It makes me feel so much better, and ... I mean. Except for right now, you seem happy today. Like ... lighthearted." He sighed a little. "Maybe I can stop feeling so guilty, now."

"You felt guilty?" said JC curiously, wondering when he'd missed *that*. "Why? Did you feel sorry for me because I was still single?"

"No," Joey said patiently. "I felt *responsible*. Like ... my issues were keeping you from finding someone, my being so dependent on you. It was easier for me to depend on you, and it was easier for you to *have* me depend on you." He hugged him closer again and kissed the top of his head. "I didn't want to mess up the chances you've had in the past, but I know I did."

"No, it's not like that," said JC, shaking his head at him but not moving away at all. It had always felt good to be held in Joey's arms, and he was pretty sure it always would. "I wanted to be doing what we were doing just as much as you did. It's just ... it's time, you know? I made you understand you were ready, and that made me understand that maybe I was ready, too."

"Well, okay," Joey said carefully. "The point is that I want this for you too, baby. And I'm not too worried about you messing it up. That guys had the balls to ... well. He just was very straightforward, about his intentions. And wasn't scared to tell me about them."

JC pulled his head up in surprise. "Really?" he said, wondering more than ever just what had been said between them the day before. "And what kind of intentions were those?"

But Joey infuriatingly shook his head. "That's for him to tell you, I think. He just ... wanted a better sense of you and me, maybe. And don't pretend you guys haven't talked about your intentions, either, because I *know* you, and as disturbing the number of times you fucked probably is, you still had plenty of time to discuss it."

"You have *no* idea how many times we fucked," said JC, shooting Joey a look before curling back up with him again. "Okay, yeah, of course we discussed it. I brought him here, didn't I? But I want to know what he said to *you*." He realized he was actually whining about five seconds after he said it.

"Tough shit," Joey said easily, rubbing a strong hand along JC's spine. "Like I said, he'll tell you if he wants to. I'm not involved. Okay? Now. Give me the juicy parts. How many times *did* you fuck."

"How many ... ?" began JC, realizing he hadn't calculated them all up before now. "Um ... 8? I think? Maybe 9 ... " He felt a flush creeping up on his face and couldn't look up; he and Chris had certainly been busy since they'd hooked up.

Joey made a squeaking noise. "Uh, okay. Jesus. No fucking wonder you needed a nap, man." He looked up, and Joey was smiling at him appraisingly. "You walking okay? I know you, and I know most of those times had you spreading your legs, rather than the other way around ... "

"Yeah," chuckled JC. There was no embarassment in it with Joey; they knew each other too well. "Like ... all. And you know damn well I can take it." Though he *was* feeling it now, a lot more than he normally would. Not only had it been a while, he'd never been quite that active before.

"Jesus, kiddo," Joey breathed, letting his hand slip down to rub gently over JC's ass. "I don't think either of you are *going* anywhere, you don't have to kill yourselves." JC knew Joey was the tiniest bit jealous, though, from his petulant tone. "It was good, though? He treats you good, does what you like?"

"OH yeah," said JC emphatically, not resisting his grin. Maybe they didn't have to do it all so fast, but both of them had wanted it and that was what was important. "He definitely does what I like, and then some. And careful down there, man. I may have been able to take it, but that doesn't mean I'm not feeling it now."

"I was just trying to make you feel better," Joey sulked, pulling his hand away and resting both of them on his own legs, so JC was just draped over him rather than embraced by him. "Forget it. I think ... maybe I should go take a nap."

"What?" said JC softly. He wasn't often surprised by Joey's reactions to things, and wasn't quite sure how to cope with it when it happened. "Joey ... what?"

"Nothing," he murmured, looking away. "You just ... obviously don't need me to touch you anymore, which is fine. But I'm too tired, and a little worn out myself, to try and drag this stuff out of you. If it's private, and you don't want to say, then just say *that*. I'll understand. There's stuff I don't tell you about Justin. Not a lot, but some."

"Jesus, Joey, what haven't I told you so far," said JC, his eyes wide with shock. "What, suddenly I can't tease you, is that it? Suddenly thing have to be different between us because I found someone, too?"

"I don't ... know what the rules are, anymore," Joey said softly. "I didn't think I couldn't touch you. I *didn't* think things would be different between us, but *you're* making them that way."

"You're kidding me, right?" said JC, shaking his head. "Just what the hell have I done that's made things different? Found someone, finally? Cause that's the only thing I can think of, and if that's what it is, Joey? That's so unfair. So unfair I can't even believe you would think it."

"That's *not* it," Joey snapped back sadly. "God. Did I not just get through telling you how guilty I felt before because you *didn't* have someone?" He placed his hands on JC's shoulders, pushing him off him gently so he could sit up. "You all but told me not to touch you. And you're being all ... private. Which you're entitled to, both things. But it's defintely what *you're* doing."

"Oh please," said JC, rolling his eyes at him in frustration. "I did not, and stop taking it that way. What's gotten *into* you today. I told you how I felt about this guy, and what we did, and how often. Just about the only thing I haven't told you yet is *where*. How's that being so private, anyway?" He leaned toward Joey again, pushing the boundaries. "And may I point out that you are the one pushing *me* away?"

Joey shrank back again, refusing to look at him. "You're just not really ... volunteering. Like, how he makes you feel. Or the nice things he said. *That*'s what I care about, not whether you ... fucked in the closet, or something."

He brushed a hand over his eyes. "Look. Jace. This is going to mean some growing pains for us. It already did, even before Chris. Because of Justin. I don't want to *fight*, I just need you to detail the boundaries."

"Well Jesus, Joey, don't stop touching me at least, all right?" he said, pressing the heel of his hand to his forehead, feeling a headache starting to come on. "Look ... I told you ... I'm kinda rusty at this stuff. I'm not even sure I *know* what I'm feeling. You were pretty crap at it too, when things started with Justin, so you don't have to get all on *my* case, you know ... "

Joey bit his lip, then to JC's great relief gathered him in his arms again. "I love you. I love you, JC. And you have the patience of a saint. And ... I'm sorry I'm not asking you the right questions. Please, I ... just want to know if he's good to you. That's all."

JC chuckled a little. "I wasn't kidding when I said he was, honey," he said quietly, relieved to be back in Joey's arms, where he still felt the most secure. "He's the most considerate, smart, funny, sweet guy I've been with. And, honestly? The best lover, too. He's great for me. Which ... um ... still freaks me out a little, I think ... "

"Aww, baby, why?" Joey said quietly. "You haven't had a lover, a real one, in forever. Not someone you cared about. You're overdue, don't you think?" He hugged him closer, resolutely putting his hand back on JC's butt.

"Well yeah," said JC. "Exactly. I *haven't* had a real lover in a while. And now ... I do. And not *just* a lover, but someone I think I could just ... *be* with. In everything, Joey." He knew how wide his eyes were when he looked up at Joey again. "Don't *you* think that's a little scary?"

"Feels good to me," Joey smiled. "But I already had my three-year long panic attack about it, so." He leaned over and kissed JC's forehead, then his lips, softly. "It doesn't have to be scary, if it's something that feels right."

"So," said JC conversationally, hoping his voice wasn't shaking too much. "You think Justin's it for you? Like, the one?"

"The ONE one?" Joey frowned. "I ... he's a baby, Jace. And I ... " He turned his head, stared over at the wall. "We just have to see." JC immediately felt bad for asking, when he probably should have known that they'd have a tougher time staying together, if they did, than he and Chris would. If THEY did.

"Because I was just thinking," said JC softly. "That they should get to know each other. Um ... considering how much they're gonna see of each other from now on." And he gave Joey a cuddle and a tentative smile.

"You're right about that, at least, I think," Joey smiled, kissing his head again, looking a little more relieved that was the direction JC went with his comment. "Though ... I mean, not that I mind you guys being here, but ... does Chris not have his own place either, or something?"

"And just where do you think we *went* that first night, honey?" JC asked him wtih a lifted eyebrow. Joey may not have been suggesting that they go there from now on, but it certainly felt like it. "It was ... important to me to have him here," he added a few moments later. "I think I needed to prove something to myself. And ... it's my *home*, Joey ... "

"No, no, no," Joey said soothingly. "I know. I *know* how important that was, and I'm really proud of you. I'm just ... okay, that was my really awkward way of trying to get you to tell me where he lived, and all. Not in the freshman dorms, I assume ... "

JC laughed suddenly. "How is it that you two have met in passing so many times and you don't know anything about each other?" he asked, more than half rhetoricaly. "Yeah, he has an apartment, not too far from the club we went to. Freshman dorm, honey?" He tsked playfully. "I'm the one who goes for *older* guys, remember."

"That was a *joke*," Joey groaned. "My own issues with having to sneak through those hallowed halls every other night are coming to light." He nudged JC a little. "We haven't met that much," he reminded him. "And whenever I do, you're *definitely* monopolizing his time."

"Yeah, but it's been, you know, a little while," said JC, even though he knew that Joey was right. "And I thought you told me that the freshman dorm made you feel youn again?" he teased, squeezing Joey's waist. "Or was that just another coping mechanism?"

"Definitely a coping mechansim," Joey groaned. "I forgot how small those damn beds are. And me and Justin, neither of us is exactly small." He sighed and wrapped JC up again. "So you'll let me talk to him tonight, then?"

"Which is why I usually come home to find both of you here," said JC with a knowing nod of his head. "So of *course* I'll let you talk to him tonight, if you really want to. I'd appreciate it, actually."

"We'll have to pick our conversation back up where it left off, then," Joey said, infuriatingly not volunteering anything more than that. That means you have to keep Justin company ... "

"Keeping Justin company is nothing new to me, honey," said JC, giving Joey a significant look and a smile. Sometimes it didn't hurt to remember what had gotten them all to where they were. "You're not *actually* upset that I'd have Chris over here a lot, are you?"

"No, not at all," Joey replied, looking a little offended. "REALLY, Jace, that's not why I brought it up. I'm glad you feel comfortable having him here. I was just being nosy, is all. Why are you so worried about us getting along?"

"Why do you think?" he said quietly. "Because I really, really like this guy, Joey. Really like him. And if he's going to be in my life, you two have to get along. It's like ... it's not optional. I have to get along with Justin and you have to get along with Chris or things might get bad."

"Well, that's what I meant. Why are you so worried that we *won't*? He seems fine. He's smart, and funny, and thinks a lot of you, and seems to understand better than a lot of people -- maybe including Justin -- the way *our* relationship works." Joey ducked his head to try and catch JC's eye. "You think I'm going to get in the way? Be jealous?"

JC shook his head, wishing Joey was just implicitly understanding this better than he was. "It's been a long time since I've been in this position before, is all," he said after a moment of thought. "If ever, Joey. I've never had quite so much at stake, so of *course* I'm nervous. It doesn't mean i don't have as much faith in you as I ever did, Joeykins. I'm just ... fluttery and uptight and not at all comfortable with the whole thing yet."

"I can tell," Joey said quietly. "But you're not bawling like I was when I figured out how much I had at stake, so that's a plus. Jace ... what can I do? To make you feel comfortable? You want me to invite Chris over myself or something, or answer the phone if ... when he calls?"

JC shook his head and smiled at him. "It's just a time thing," he said, believing it. "It's just me needing time to get used to the idea of being with someone again, and getting comfortable actually incorporating him into my life -- my life with you, which is, like, my *entire* life -- and that's something I've just ... well, you know as well as I do that I've never done it before."

"It's going to be fine," Joey smiled again, obviously reassured that was all it was. "We'll get along fine. We already had our ... time to size each other up. And it was better, probably, not to have you there. Now we can just worry about getting to know each other, while we both do our parts to make *you* happy." He nuzzled into his neck. "You're the only person I'd do this for, Jace."

"Well good," said JC. "I'd hate to think there was some other guy that you've been coming home to every night for years, who's been there for you through everythiing and who's had you be there for him, too, who loves you more than just about anything. Because it's supposed to be all about me." He grinned and kissed Joey's lips gently. "Nothing changes, okay? We're still you and me."

"Okay," Joey smiled, relief evident in his voice, before kissing him back. "God, it still feels good to do that. I think ... well. I think Justin feels a little better, now."

"Yeah?" said JC, hoping that was true as he pressed his cheek to Joey's shoulder again. "Is he kinda ... getting used to it now?"

"I don't know if he'll ever get used to it," Joey said quietly, and JC felt a twinge of guilt himself at how it hadn't been easy for them. Justin wasn't Chris, and Chris had taken the whole thing even better than he expected. "But ... he accepts it."

"At least he understand, now," said JC carefully. "More or less, what it is. Understands better than just about anyone else, anyway." His concern -- their concern -- for Justin didn't stop them from being what they were to each other, though. There was too much history, too much emotion there now.

"He's just ... my baby," Joey sighed. "He's a sweetheart but he's used to getting what he wants. And he doesn't like to share. Chris ... he seems like he'll take it better. Not insecure?"

"He is your baby," said JC with a nod. "And that boy went through hell and high water to *be* your baby. Talk about getting what he wants." He gave Joey a knowing grin. "At least he knows how to work for it. And it's me ... and I think that maybe it's easier because he *knows* me. And ... I think it'll be easier *because* I have Chris now? Chris who, yeah, doesn't seem insecure about that at all, really."

"Not any more, at least," Joey replied carefully. "As for Justin ... yeah, that's what I meant. You having Chris will make him feel better. But just because he *knows* you ... that doesn't necessarily make it easier. You know, I'm still not convinced *he's* convinced we never ... you know."

"And I know you've talked about it," said JC. "I don't even have to ask that. I guess ... what we have isn't in his scope of experience. He can't label it and put it in a box and understand it just like that. We'll just ... give him more time." He kissed Joey's cheek gently, comfortable curled up against him. "Not that you needed the advice or anything. You two are doing ... great. Just great, Joey."

"We are," Joey said softly. "He's ... for wanting what he wants, he's so patient with me. And, like, being just unconditional about the affection he shows, and ... he's what I needed, Jace. I know it was so hard for him and it took me so long to stop feeling like I *owed* him anything, but ... yeah. It's really, really great."

JC smiled broadly, thrilled to the core every time he heard Joey say that. "I'm just glad he makes you happy," he said gently. "You deserved that more than just about anyone I've ever known, sugar."

Joey blushed. "I don't know why you say that, but thank you. Maybe another person wouldn't have let it all affect him so much, what happened to me before ... but I can't help but think I never would've gotten Justin if I hadn't been the way I was. That boy doesn't do things the easy way, either."

"Was there an easy way for him to do things?" challenged JC with some amusement, but mostly sympathy. "Or were you talking about something else?"

"No, that's what I meant. Just ... finding a boyfriend, if that's even what he was after. Would've been easier if he'd gone for someone else. Someone not quite so fucked up."

"He didn't want someone else," said JC, kissing him again, knowing Joey still needed comfort when it came to Justin, from time to time. "Obviously. That boy's been head over heels for you from the start. And aren't you glad for it, too."

Joey blushed. "Maybe not from the *start*," he demurred. "But thank you, Jace. It's so nice of you to support me. Us. *You've* been patient too, with me never having had a boyfriend, and all ... Just telling me how to do it. Do it right, I mean." He smiled. "Now you get to practice what you preach. You cooked for Chris, yet?"

"Breakfast," said JC with a quick nod of his head. "The most romantic meal of the day. And I *know* I taught you that one." Which wasn't supposed to make Joey remember how things had been, and he hoped it didn't. He knew that Joey was as thrilled to see Justin in the morning now as he'd been annoyed and scared to see someone before. "Having a boyfriend's not so different from having a girlfriend, and I know you know about that. Except the sex, of course. And everything else." He pushed himself back just far enough to give Joey a wink.

"It's different enough," Joey said quietly, and looked like he was in his own little world for a minute. "At any rate, I'm relieved that you hold yourself to the high standards you set for me. I'm sure Chris appreciates it too. You're not *his* first boyfriend, are you?"

"Oh hell no ... " JC said, then paused and thought about it. "Wait. Maybe. But I don't think so. I mean, I'm far, far, far from the first guy he's been with."

Joey paused and looked at him. "That doesn't mean much," he said, pointedly. "I mean, think about me. But ... no. I think you're right. He doesn't seem freaked out about that part of it, at least."

"He's had relationships at least," said JC. "Good ones. Long ones. So yeah ... this is nothing all that new to him. You know what sucks though? Well, it doesn't suck, but it's certainly inconvenient ... "

Joey pulled JC up into his lap and started rubbing his back, staying carefully and instictively away from his sorer muscles. "What's that, babe?"

"He has a *cat*," laughed JC, molding easily under Joey's hands and very, very happy to be there. He hadn't really been acknowledging how sore he was, but you don't get that much exercise in a 36-hour period without straining a few things. "Doesn't that just figure? It was like ... fate, telling me I needed to take him home with me."

"Ew!" Joey laughed. "A *cat*? That's ... yeah." He chuckled. "Although I'm sure that wasn't the only thing of his that was telling you to bring him home ... "

"No," admitted JC with a grin. "Far from it. But, you know ... it was like someone up there was making *sure* I didn't miss the signs on this one."

"You have to be the cutest thing in the world," Joey cuddled him. "You also seem so happy ... should we maybe do something special, tonight? Or do you think you'd rather just ... sort of pick halves of the house, and stay out of each other's way?"

"There's no sense avoiding each other," insisted JC, not wanting to see that happen at all. "We *should* do something special, for everyone. And ... me and Chris could probably use a little recovery time anyway. But my door is gonna be closed tonight, just so you know." Which it hadn't been, to Joey, in a long time, and it was a bittersweet thing to have it happen now. "But not ... " JC backtracked a little bit, because that didn't feel quite right. "Just knock, that's all."

"The same goes for you," Joey said quietly, and JC knew he understood. "Are you sure it's okay if Justin and I stay here too? It probably would be okay if we went back to the dorm, if not ... "

"It's cool, Joey, really," JC assured him. "I know this is ... well, to say it's a new situation for us is probably an understatement. But it's going to happen sooner or later, so ... why not now? It'll be good. Honest."

"Let me just reiterate my earlier sentiment, about not sharing," Joey replied, with such a serious expression JC had to do a double-take to realize he was kidding.

JC laughed, nervously, and kissed his forehead with a wet smack. "You *know* what I meant," he said. "And I guarantee you we won't be standing at your door listening, or anything. And this way, Justin can see me and Chris together ... "

Joey nodded again, once more with more relief than JC would've expected in his expression. "That'll be good. Really good. Let's ... order chinese, say? Have dinner together and then Justin and I'll leave you newlyweds alone."

JC grinned at him, thinking that sounded just about perfect. "For all I know, he's gonna have work to do again," he had to admit, though. "He has this meeting with his advisor on Monday and I'm getting the feeling that he's really, really feeling unready for it."

"Not the most convenient time to fall in love, huh," Joey said breezily, then looked surprised at himself and pulled back to catch JC's expression. "Uh ... not that that's what you're doing ... "

"I didn't say it was," agreed JC warily, wondering where the hell *that* had come from, especially out of Joey. "But ... " He knew he could tell Joey anything, that was the beauty of their friendship. "I didn't say I wasn't, either." Then he exhaled softly and pressed his face to Joey's neck again.

He heard Joey inhale sharply, but to his friend's credit he didn't pull away, or do anything expect hold him tighter. "Oh, Jace," he whispered quietly. "I ... kinda hope you are."

"I kinda hope I am, too," said JC softly, as though the words would be less monumental if they were quiet. "I kinda ... think ... I am."

Joey reached down to touch JC's face, cupping it carefully and looking into his eyes. Smiling. "Does he know?"

JC nodded, smiling back, afraid of what was happening but not in the way that Joey had been afraid of the same thing happening. "He knows," he said confidently. "And, um, I know, too. About him."

Joey just nodded in return, and looked away, but not before JC could see him blink back soft tears. "Um. That's ... that's so perfect, JC. Can I ... just, thank you. For sharing that with me. Trusting me."

"You're my Joey," he said simply, because that *did* explain everything. "I share everything with you." He grinned and turned Joey's face back toward him. "Except Chris," he added, kissing him gently again.

"You know," Joey chuckled, kissing JC back and then licking at his lower lip teasingly. "Perhaps it's things like this that make poor Justin so confused."

"Yes, but it's things like this that make us ... us," said JC simply. "And no matter who I end up with, Joey, I always want us to be this, okay?" He did kiss his cheek again the next time, though. "And we've been awfully good about not doing it in front of him, until he's comfortable ... "

"I'm not sure he'll *ever* be comfortable with that part, baby," Joey said quietly. "But we have been good. Hopefully ... we won't need it as much anymore. We'll still need each *other*, but ... maybe less in that way."

"Maybe yeah," agreed JC with a smile. It was good to hear Joey aknowledge that, admit that he was relying more on Justin as his partner and emotional support and less on JC. It was what he'd been pushing for, for a while now, and he wasn't afraid that he and Joey were going to lose their bond because of it. It was too strong for that. "And who knows where Justin's comfort level is going to be once the two of you are more secure, honey? Just wait and see."

"I will," Joey replied, with a tentative smile. "We'll be fine. YOU guys will be fine. In the meantime ... wanna go take a nap? For old time's sake? And since I suspect your sheets are less than clean?"

JC rolled his eyes just thinking about it. "Less than clean," he had to admit, "is a gross understatement. Remind me to start the laundry before anyone comes over. But for now? I think napping sounds perfect."

--

Chris tried to be appeased by the slump of JC's shoulders as he closed the front door behind Joey, but it just didn't quite work. The heavy sigh didn't do it either, as he turned back around to face him. "Chris," he started awkwardly. "I don't ... this isn't anything new ... "

Chris nodded his head slowly, knowing that his frown wasn't leaving his face as he looked at him. "*What*, exactly, isn't anything new?" he had to ask. "Did I miss something really important, when we got together?"

"No, no," JC said quickly, reaching out a hesitant hand but pulling it back before Chris could even decide whether or not to let it touch him. "I *told* you, about me and Joey, and everything I said was the truth. We're *just* friends, no matter ... I mean, even if that didn't quite ... look like it."

"No, it didn't," acknowledged Chris, still reeling from what he'd walked in on, and how he'd been struggling to figure out what it meant. "Never had just a friend I could do quite that with. Which ... doesn't mean I think you're lying. Just because it never happened to me doesn't mean it *can't* ... " But he did want JC to explain, more than he had.

"Joey and I have been ... doing that ... since before he even figured out he was into guys," JC replied, looking uncomfortable but not making a move to go anywhere. "So, I mean. We're just ... both really affectionate. Especially when something's wrong."

Chris laughed self-consciously, pretty sure he wasn't supposed to find that funny. "You're sure he didn't know?" he asked, which he knew was beside the point, but it was marginally more comfortable. "If you're right about that, it's not a surprise he figured it out soon after."

JC bit his lip, but met Chris's look. "I'm not ... sure what you're implying," he said stiltedly. "They aren't ... they didn't start out as sexual, at all. I didn't turn him gay, Chris."

"Oh hell, I know," said Chris, shaking his head. "Can't turn someone gay, JC. I'm just saying ... if there's anything that might prompt a sexual awakening in a guy, it's a kiss from you ... "

JC blushed, and showed the beginnings of a sweet smile, before he apparently remembered that it wasn't necessarily a compliment. Not in this context, at least. "Like I said, they weren't sexual, then. And they're not now, no matter what it might've looked like. And they *barely* were, in between."

"But they were, once?" asked Chris uncertainly. "I'm not ... I *believe* you, JC. I just don't really get it."

"No, I just ... " JC growled in obvious frustration. "I can barely explain it. They *might* have been. Like, there were times when we had to stop each other, or rely on each other to stop ourselves. Before things went, um. Too far. But it was *never* sex."

Chris nodded at him as though he understood. He was still unsure, but JC's painful frustration wasn't worth this. "I know that you guys are close," he said slowly, as serious as he had ever been. "And I'm find with that. And I'm *not* sorry that the two of you never got together and because of that you and I managed to meet. But ... if you both wanted it that badly, then why? Why stop?"

"Because we're friends first," JC explained, trying to seem patient. "And the times when it was close, it was because one of us was hurting, usually. And that's, like, the worst reason to try and be with someone, don't you think?" He looked at Chris plaintively. "I know you're trying to understand. I just ... I'm sorry if it makes you doubt me."

"It doesn't, JC," said Chris firmly. "I'm not doubting you. I'm just trying to get it. So." He reached out for JC finally, brushing his fingers along JC's thigh. "What was wrong this time, then?"

At that, JC looked even more embarrassed. "It's ... um. Stuff with Justin. I'm not ... I don't know if Joey would want me to say, Chris. I promise, I'm not just feeding you a line, either ... "

Chris sighed and dropped his hand. He understood, even though he wanted to be childish about it. " Okay," he said. "You don't have to tell me, JC."

"Chris," JC pleaded softly, grabbing for his fingers so quickly that Chris had to suppress a smile. "It's just ... a little embarrassing. Especially because of what ... you just saw. If I tell you, I'm probably setting myself up for a lecture."

"I hope you're not suggesting I'm gonna give you a lecture," said Chris, letting the smile show through now.. "Because if there's one thing I'm *not* good at ... " He squeezed JC's hand, trying to let it go and not push. "I want to know what's going on, but I *always* want to know what's going on. That doesn't mean you have to tell me. I'll just pout for a while."

JC sighed, and Chris could've predicted that was all it would take. "It's just that ... Justin kind of isn't ... taking this very well. I think he thought that things would change, when he and Joey hooked up ... and then that they definitely would since you were in the picture." JC's blush grew crimson. "He walked in on something, too, and kind of ... let Joey have it."

"Oh no," said Chris softly. He was getting to know Justin a little, and knew a bit about the insecurity that lay below the surface there. "Walking in one what I just walked in on, or ... something else?"

"No, that was mostly it," JC sighed, looking chastised. "I mean ... I might have been sitting on Joey's lap, but otherwise ... yeah. Just kissing." He blinked and looked down at his hands. "I mean, not 'just,' but ... "

Chris paused for another moment, again deciding how to approach this. Deciding whether he was on solid enough ground to ask a few more questions or not. "If ... this is something that isn't going to end, between you ... then he'll get used to it. Eventually. Has Joey talked to him about it?"

"A million times," JC exhaled. "The problem -- well, one of the problems, at least -- is that I don't think he honestly believes we were never lovers. For whatever reason. Maybe it's because of how close we were, particularly, right when they met. How much it seemed like Joey needed me then? I mean, if it was ever going to happen between us, it's true that would've been it. I think."

"But you didn't," said Chris, and it wasn't a question. He sighed gently an wrapped an arm around JC's waist. "Justin just isn't ... as experienced, as a lot of people," he added, hoping he wasn't too far off the mark, there. "But he does trust Joey ... and you ... right?"

JC shrugged, and looked almost miserable, even as he leaned into Chris's touch. "I don't *know* if he does," he whispered. "I just don't want him to leave Joey, because of me. When there's no *reason* to. How can he not see how he's got Joey wrapped around his little finger?"

"Because he's a kid," said Chris quietly, pulling JC close. "And because he hasn't had enough time to see that yet. And because -- and I don't say this lightly -- that boy has NO idea what he does to people. No idea. I don't know what kind of life he had before he came here? But he was either really sheltered or he changed a lot the summer between high school and college, because he has no concept that he's a painfully sweet, beautiful boy that Joey is crazy about."

"And Joey, of course, is being stubborn about it," JC went on, closing his eyes. "I mean, I think he's ... still scared. A lot. Of what's happening there, about what *will* happen. That's what we were talking about when Justin, uh. Found us. And, I mean, I *don't* think we should have to change the way we are with each other, but I'd do it, if he wanted to."

Chris sighed and paused, again unsure of where to take this, and knowing that he just had no concept of what was between them. "You shouldn't have to," he said finally. "And no one should make you choose. But Justin needs some careful handling here, I think. And ... " This was where things got really tricky. "So does Joey, I think. Which doesn't help things."

"What do you mean, baby?" JC asked seriously, touching Chris's face. And it felt nice, no matter how much he did or didn't want JC touching him right then. Since he wasn't quite sure himself. "Careful, how?"

"Just ... that Joey's still scared about it," said Chris carefully. "I know you haven't told me everything that went on there, and that's fine, seriously, but I think it means the both of them have their issues. And that doesn't help things. They'd both needy and insecure in their own way."

"No, that's true," JC sighed, resting his forehead on Chris's shoulder. "I didn't mean for this to turn into something about them, though, baby. Except that you're such an amazing, selfless person, I'm not surprised that's what you're letting me talk about ... "

"I'm not selfless," scoffed Chris, kissing his hair gently. "I'm not ... not sure what to think of this yet. Except I know that you and Joey have a friendship that's closer than any I've ever had. And I know that Justin is gonna have a lot more trouble with this than me, because I'm old and jaded and he's young and innocent."

"Plus, he's ... a little bit self-centered." JC looked embarrassed to be saying that behind his back, but he must have meant it. As for you ... I just hope I've been able to convince you, in a lot of ways, how the things I feel for you, and the things I feel for Joey, are just ... not even in the same universe."

"I understand that," Chris assured him, as best he could. "I know that what you feel for Joey is very different from what you feel for me. I'm not entirely sure *how*, but I know it is."

"Joey," JC said slowly, turning Chris's cheek so they were looking right into each other's eyes, "doesn't make my heart fucking pound like this whenever he's in the room. What do you mean, you don't know how it's different?"

Chris smiled at him, his own heart pounding now. "Well, I'm glad for that," he said. "I'm just saying how I don't know how you feel about HIM. But if you want to keep flattering me for a while and telling me how I make your heart pound, you just keep right on doing that."

JC smiled gently, and shifted so he was standing close between Chris's thighs. "He doesn't make my heart pound," he repeated. "He doesn't make me touch myself every time I'm on the phone with him, even if it's just to tell me what time you ... he's coming home."

"And I'm glad for that, too," said Chris, reaching up to touch JC's hair, like he often did when he was feeling both affectionate and vulnerable at once. He still wasn't sure that JC and Joey *couldn't* have been together .. but the fact was that they weren't and he, at least, had no doubts about that. "So ... *every* time?"

"Every time," JC echoed, blushing again but not averting his eyes. "You make me want you so bad, Chris, I get hard when you say hello. But that's not even the biggest difference, between the two of you."

"Hello," whispered Chris in JC's ear, then grinned at him mischievously. "So what *is* the biggest difference, then?"

"The biggest difference," JC murmured, his eyes fluttering shut, "is that it didn't occur to me, after just one night with him, that I could be with him as long as he'd have me."

"That's a big difference," acknowledged Chris, stroking his hair with an only-slightly-shaky hand. "I like that difference. It's a difference that makes me feel special."

"Because you *are*," JC said intently, blinking those huge blue eyes at him. "God, Chris. Joey couldn't do in a year what took you a matter of weeks ... if it even occured to him to try. Which is just *another* difference. Can you just ... please say you understand. Or forgive me, if I've done something to make you mad ... "

"There's nothing to forgive," said Chris immediately. "You didn't do anything wrong. And ... I'm *trying* to understand, JC. I'm not doubting you at all. It just takes a little getting used to. Which is why I can understand where Justin's coming from. If it's taking *me* a little while to get used to it ... well, it's gonna take him a little longer."

"I know that," JC sighed, frowning and stepping back out of Chris's arms a little. "Hopefully that's where he went. Hopefully. He does have a magic touch with that boy, when he's patient enough to use it. It's when they both get worked up that things get ... messy."

"That's what they have you for," said Chris, believing every word of that. "Because you'll coddle them when they need it and be hard as nails when they need *that*. I know *that* about you already, my dear."

"I don't really ... fill that role so much, any more," JC's frown deepened, and he turned toward the kitchen. "Justin won't confide in me that much any more. Not that he blames *me* for anything, necessarily, but ... I guess I lost those priveleges."

"Lost those privileges?" repeated Chris back to him. "That hardly seems fair. Why do you think he would do that, to you?"

JC's shoulders rose and fell in another shrug as he grabbed some grapes from the fridge. "I guess, since I'm part of the problem. I don't know. It's okay ... he has other friends. And as long as he still knows I'm here for him if he needs it, I'm going to let him do it on his own."

Chris followed him, wrapping an arm around his waist again. "Do you guys maybe want *me* to talk to Justin?" he asked sincerely. "I'm just about the only person who's in the same position as he is ... "

"He'd probably throw a fit, if he knew I told you. Hell, *Joey* might even throw a fit." JC sighed, and leaned his forehead on the surface of the fridge. "But maybe, if it comes up. You don't *have* to, though. Unless it's something *you* want to talk about, too?"

"I don't *have* to do anything," Chris reminded him with a wry smile. "And I *know* you know I know that. I just want to help. I might just ... bring it up. How I feel about it. And see if he responds? Of course, I don't have to. I don't have to do that at all if you think it's a bad idea."

Shrugging again, JC exhaled loudly. "I trust your judgment," he murmured. "And maybe it'll all blow over soon anyway. Either that, or we really *will* have to start being more discreet."

"Don't change what you don't want to, okay JC?" he said, tugging him closer and finding his eyes. "Neither you, nor Joey, would be who you are without what you have. You wouldn't be the people we fell for. And sooner or later, Justin's going to come to realize that."

JC blinked slowly, then let his eyes drop to Chris's mouth. "You always say the most perfect things," he whispered, still gripping the fridge behind him with tense fingers. "You wouldn't think you walked in on your boyfriend kissing another man, twenty minutes ago."

"You guys aren't used to being walked in on, huh?" said Chris, touching JC's chin to bring his eyes back up. He didn't think he was saying anything particularly perfect, but whatever it was, it had worked. "Twice in a row. That's rough."

"It's also not the point," JC replied quietly. "I can't ... I mean, god, I can't believe I'm about to say this, after complaining about Justin, but ... do you not *care*, really?"

"I care. A lot. And I'm terribly selfish and want your lips to myself," admitted Chris, holding his eyes, needing JC to see this as much as hear it. "But they aren't mine, they're yours, and you have to do what *you* want to do with them. And whatever the situation is, we all need to get comfortable with it. Which is why the stuff I just said? It *is* the point. Everything is wrapped up in everything else."

Nodding, JC reached out to pull Chris closer, so they were pressed together against the fridge. "Okay. Thank you. That was sufficiently jealous-sounding that I won't have to go ... act out, or something, just to get your attention."

Chris grinned at him and toyed with his hair again. "You wouldn't do that," he said, not at all sure that JC wouldn't. "And I'm not exactly jealous, just ... " He thought about how to explain it, then laughed a little. "Jealous. But a different jealous."

JC closed his eyes and nuzzled into Chris's hand. "Like, different like you and Joey are different, to me?" he murmured quietly, starting to move his hips a little against the fridge. "Different like that?"

"Maybe, yeah," admitted Chris, considering that. "Maybe that's how it is. But never doubt that you have my *full* attention, JC. All the time."

JC bit his lip. "How did *you* mean it, then?" he asked, not reacting to what could have easily been interpreted as an insult. "What are you jealous of?"

"That he had you first," said Chrs, though he had to admit to himself that wasn't the whole story. "That he knows you better than me. There's just ... no WAY he knew what he had, in you, or he never would have let me have you. And that's a bit unsettling."

JC's expression softened, and the corners of his mouth curled up. "Good thing I didn't find the prospect of sleeping with him as irresistable as it was with you," he teased affectionately, before growing serious again. "Chris, he's my best friend. But he never has, and never would, be able to tell me what to do. Especially if it came to being with you." He cocked his head. "He may or may not have had his chances, but whatever chances he did have ... he doesn't. Any more."

"I want to say scary things to you right now," admitted Chris with a smile, pulling him closer still. "But I know I don't have to. Because you already know. And I don't care what he says now, I won't give you back."

JC wrapped his arms around himself and squirmed closer, breathing on Chris's throat. "You, on the other hand, I *like* to think about telling me what to do. Like ... I might do anything you want me to do, for every one of those scary things you think you might could tell me ... "

"So ... if I told you that I wanted you to stop worrying about your friendship with Joey and start focusing on how we make each other happy ... that would be a good thing?" teased Chris. "Or were you talking about something like ... telling you I want you to take me into the bedroom now." He kissed JC's forhead, going on before he could stop himself. "Or maybe you were talking about me telling you how much harder I fall for you every day."

JC gasped quietly. "Chris, I just ... " He shook his head and grabbed Chris's hand, tugging him eagerly out of the kitchen. "Fuck; all of it, okay? I want to hear all of that. I don't deserve it, but like I said earlier ... I'm going to take it, as long as you let me."

"Why on earth would you think you don't deserve that?" asked Chris as JC continued to tug him away. "You do. Every word of it. And a whole bunch more that I haven't said yet. And you know that you do ... so what's going on with you that you're so doubtful about that right now?"

"Guilt," JC muttered, shutting the door to his room behind them and pushing Chris over to the bed. "That I must not do a good enough job of convincing you that even if you weren't going to let Joey have me, that I would ever want him more than you. I let him kiss me, Chris, and I kiss him back, but I don't let him into my *soul*." He paused, the backs of Chris's knees against the mattress. "How's that, for scary things to say?"

Chris hit the bed, falling more than sitting. "Pretty scary," he admitted with a smile that was shyer than he meant it to be. But JC did that to him, made him feel younger again. More vulnerable. More open. "But in the good way. And I believe you, JC. That doesn't mean I'm not scared of losing you."

"To Joey??" JC asked, and to his credit, looked honestly incredulous. "Chris ... like you've said ... if it hasn't happened before this ... it won't happen now that I have someone who's right for *me*. And he has someone who's right for *him*." He knelt down over Chris on the bed. "Don't you know you're kind of stuck with me, baby? I basically bought stock in Benedryl so I can be with you."

Chris grinned at him, half amused, half touched. "Love me, love my cat," he said softly. "I'm not so much afraid of losing you to him as losing you at all ... he's just the biggest threat. Most of the good things in my life, I've managed to lose. And ... I just don't want that to happen with you, JC."

"Well," JC smiled in return, "I'm the opposite -- I've never let anything go that I've wanted to hold on to," he explained. "And even some things I didn't. So maybe we ... balance each other out. Like we seem to do, with everything."

"I hope so," said Chris, pulling JC down closer. "I really hope so, because I don't ever want to lose what I have with you now. It makes me feel ... different, inside, like I haven't before. Good and peaceful and excited and stuff. It's like ... you're the first person who's absolutely consumed me but hasn't made me forget about everything else in my life. Like you instantly became this part of it with us hardly even trying."

"It did seem too easy," JC admitted, sliding gently over Chris's body, lean and warm. "But ... I don't know, I'm taking that as a good sign. I'm taking *everything* as a good sign." He smiled. "Except, still, the part about how I can't make you jealous the easy way."

"I trust you too much to get jealous," said Chris, kissing him wetly but not dirtily. "I hope that's not *too* unflattering for you. I just ... *know* ... that you're mine, as much as I'm yours. And I think that's a pretty good sign too."

"I *am* yours," JC agreed readily, tilting his head up to expose his neck to Chris. "And I totally share that trust, I just ... you know. Sometimes it's nice to have your lover get insanely irrational over you. Like ... flattering."

"I'll have to find other ways to flatter you, then," said Chris, kissing at JC's neck without even having to really think about it. It was practically instinct. "But I can get insanely irrational sometimes if you *really* want me to. Caveman Chris!" He beat his chest playfully and grabbed at JC's hair. "Would that work?"

JC flipped off of him, and pressed the back of his wrist to his forehead dramatically. "Oh, *Chris*," he exhaled breathily. "Don't! I promise, I'll do whatever you say ... "

Chris grinned and tugged at JC's pants. "Anything?" he repeated, raising an eyebrow at him. He knew he didn't do it well, and just hoped he didn't look weird and squinty. "I think I know just the thing ... "

"Anything!" JC repeated, still in that breathy voice, lifting his hips eagerly. "Just don't ... hurt me," he winked. "I feel ... uh, weak." JC knew Chris knew he was teasing, making it a game, but he also looked so earnest that Chris just knew that not all of it was for show.

"Then it's a good thing you're lying down," he said, crawling overtop of him and kissing him wetly again. "I'd hate to be fucking you up against the wall again and have you fall ... " He pulled back to stare into JC's eyes, and could only hope that his own were shining as much.

"You'd catch me," JC murmured passionately, assuredly. "I know you would." He picked his head up to capture Chris's lips in another deep kiss. "But we can test it next time, instead." His tongue delved deeper into Chris's mouth.

"I would," said Chris confidently. "But I can fall pretty hard, too, sometimes." He toyed with JC's hair but didn't tug it this time. JC's lips -- his body -- looked so inviting, but he was hesitant to just dive right in this time. Didn't want JC to get the wrong impression, that he would try to avoid any serious subjects with either a joke or sex. Or both.

"If you say so," JC smiled, but his eyebrows furrowed together when Chris stopped kissing him. "But I can only remember one time when you seemed out of control ... and there wasn't anything wrong with what we did then, at all."

"I just ... want to make sure you know," said Chris haltingly. "How I feel about you, I mean. I know I've never made any secret of it, since day one, I just ... I want to know that you know. That I'd do anything you needed me to right now."

"Oh," JC whispered, blinking. "Oh, Chris. I know. I know that, baby. I've ... oh, I know. I don't know if it's what you say, or how you act, or what you look like when I tell you things, but I know. Is there ... do you need me to do something? Should I apologize again?"

"I don't want you to apologize," Chris assured him. "You don't have anything to apologize for. I just ... " He grinned at him suddenly, feeling a little lighter inside. "I'm just being silly. I know how you feel about it. Do you want to make love now?"

"Yes please," JC said innocently, holding his arms up to Chris and obviously waiting for him to drape himself back on top of him. "Chris? You know how I feel about what? Us, you mean? What's 'it'?"

"Us. Me. Everything," said Chris. He knew it was vague, but the whole idea was vague. "I know how you feel about how we relate to each other and I know that I don't have to worry about it." He lay back down over JC again, propping himself up on his arms. and kissed him tenderly. "I could say some more scary things now, so how about I just kiss you instead?"

JC's frown was so quick, and slight, that Chris barely caught it. "I told you, you can do anything you want," he reminded him softly. "And you know I'd never refuse a kiss from you. That's what got me in to your bed in the first place, and there's nowhere else I like to be more. Especially ... when what we're doing is not just fucking."

"I'm not sure it ever was," said Chris, kissing JC's neck and feeling absolutely at home there. "Even before I fell in love with you."

JC's hands danced lightly over Chris's back, his neck, like he couldn't quite figure out how to use them to get Chris to look at him. "Chris ... Chris. Please. Look up, you have to let me look at you, baby. I have to ... "

Chris looked into JC's eyes, a bit fearful but still feeling this big ball of happiness inside him, just being here with JC, feeling JC's hands on him, seeing JC's eyes on him. "I'm here," he said softly.

"You're in love with me?" he asked quietly, not blinking like he usually did, when they talked about serious things. "Not just ... not just getting there? It's something you ... something for sure?"

"Yeah, I am," said Chris, chewing his lip for a moment as he tried to read JC's reactions. "That's, um, the scary thing that I wasn't saying. I was falling, and then I fell, and now ... I'm in love with you. For sure."

JC closed his eyes, and moved his face closer instinctively to kiss Chris, more softly than he ever did. "You're so brave," he murmured against his mouth. "For saying that, for trusting me the way I know you do. God, Chris, that ... do you remember, the first day we were together, and you said that you could? Fall? And how scared I was?"

"Yeah, I remember," said Chris, remembering that was the whole reason *why* he was hesitant this time. "Are you ... this time? Is it the same?"

JC's face broke into an open grin as he shook his head. "No. Not at all. Chris ... god, I know in my head that it should be, that this is even that much more too fast, but ... I'm not, at all. My hands aren't shaking, my throat isn't tight, I'm sweating but only in anticipation because my pants are undone and I think I'm about to have you make love to me. Chris. I'm *not* scared."

"But it's not fast," said Chris, his own face breaking out into a wide grin at how well JC was dealing with it. "It's been happening for a while between us and it's been slow and wonderful and now I love you. And ... yeah. And now we're gonna make love with both of us being really unscared of this, right?"

JC nodded, and let out a purely joyful giggle. "It's a little fast. But we do other things slow and nice and ... uh, good, so ... " He squirmed under Chris gingerly. "But yeah. Now we get to make love. Unscared."

"You mean we have to take it slow?" said Chris, kissing his neck again and trying to keep his heart under control. "I can't be Caveman Chris and just grab you by the hair and take you?"

Laughing, JC shoved at his shoulders weakly. "We have time for anything you want, Caveman Chris," he smiled indulgently. "It was just an idea. Sometimes doing it slow is ... conducive to other things."

Chris smiled at him playfully and kissed him until he squrimed beneath him. "We can take it slow," he promised, tugging at JC's shirt. "So what kind of other things are we talking about, then?"

JC's hands tangled with Chris's as he reached down to try and help him tug his shirt off. "Well," he said slowly, licking at Chris's jaw. "When we do it slow, you still get me all breathless, but sometimes I can manage to get a word or three in there."

"I think maybe I'd like that," said Chris, his eyes widening a little before he got distracted by JC's body as it was slowly exposed. "We haven't really just made out much, except when Joey and Justin are around, either. And if you don't think that would be too much of a tease ... ?"

"Nope," JC replied softly, pushing up to get his shirt up over his back. "Like I said, we have plenty of time to do it, lots of different ways. But that's what you'd like? Doing it slow?" He smiled crookedly. "Or did you mean me getting to say, um. Three words to you."

"Um, either way," said Chris carefully. "As long as it's heartfelt." He stripped his own shirt off to get it out of the way and went back to work on JC's neck, burying himself there.

"Chris." JC's voice was quiet, serious, and he didn't go on until Chris's mouth had stopped moving. "Part of me doesn't want to do this, in bed. And another part of me doesn't want to say this, on the heels of what you ... told me. But the rest of me can't stand touching you another second, without knowing that you know how I feel, the way I know how you feel."

Chris leaned back and touched JC's hair again, staring into his face and thinking very carefully about what he was saying. "JC ... " He began slowly. "There are things that I would love to hear from you, I won't deny that. But I trust you to tell me when you're ready to tell me, and when you think it's the right time. And I'm not going to be hurt if that time is not now. But if you want to get up now and go somewhere else ... and touch and talk ... then I'm okay with that, too."

JC's expression softened even more. "Thank you. But this ... this is the right time. And it's even the right place, because ... well. Letting you be here in the first place, that was the ... when I started to realize that everything you were telling me you felt, I was feeling too. The first time we made love." He turned his head and looked over Chris's shoulder a little. "I used to babble when I was nervous, so much, when I was a little younger. I don't know why I am, now."

Chris smiled at him again, petting his hair gently. "You don't have to be nervous," he said, even though he knew that just saying that couldn't change the feelings inside. He was nervous, too, sure of what was happening here but unsure of *how* it was going to happen. He opened his mouth to say something else soothing, then just kissed JC instead.

JC wrenched his mouth away after only a few moments. "Stop, stop," he breathed. "Let me. Let me say it, let me just tell you that I love you without any more fanfare and buildup than it already has, so I can be eloquent and romantic and sexy and ... everything else you deserve to hear, the next time I say it. Okay?" He closed his eyes, panting softly. "See? I love you. I love you, too, Chris, and you're like a damn angel, to me, but most important, I *love* you."

"I'm glad," said Chris, and kissed him again. There was so much bubbling up inside him that he wasn't sure whether to laugh or to cry or what, so he just kissed JC with everything he had. It was a moment that needed all that, not the seriousness but the happiness that being together had brought each of them. "And now we *definitely* have to make love. To celebrate. Us."

JC shivered in his arms. "Well, get to it, Caveman Chris," he said quietly, smiling. "I can't wait to have you inside me, without having to bite my tongue to keep from blurting all those words out before I was ready for you to hear them." He touched Chris's hair, smoothed shaky fingers over his goatee. "Can't wait to say them when you come."

"I wouldn't be surprised if you saying them makes me come," murmured Chris as he went to work on JC's pants, wanting to be naked with him physically, to match the way they were naked to each other emotionally, at the moment.

JC chuckled, lifting his hips again to help Chris out. "Didn't work before," he pointed out. "Maybe there's some trick I'm missing, or something." He pushed himself up on his elbows, watching Chris tug the denim down his legs. "Is that the problem? I have to do it in the sexy voice, maybe?"

"I wasn't naked and inside you before," said Chris as he pulled JC's pants off and started on his own. "So we're gonna have to try that. You know ... just to see ... "

"Ah, and for that reason alone, no?" JC murmured, running a hand inside the back of Chris's pants as soon as he had them unzipped, cupping his ass. "You don't want to be naked and inside me because it feels good, or anything. Or because you can make *me* come right away, when you are, and I scream your name sometimes?"

"Nah, it's just to run this tiny little experiment," teased Chris, trying not to let himself get distracted by JC's touches. "Next time, *that* can be to make you scream my name ... "

"We have a lot of things to do, this next time," JC breathed, nipping at Chris's ear when he bent his head to try and see to get his pants off the rest of the way. "What else was it, you said? Pulling on my hair and, um. 'Taking' me, I believe it was?"

Chris tangled his fingers in JC's hair and tugged, just enough to be felt. "I'll definitely play Cavemen Chris when we're *not* trying to take it slow, how about? Because I guarantee you that Cavemen Chris will make you scream, JC ... "

"I don't doubt it," JC swallowed. "Uh. Right, next time. This is ... right. Slow. Right." Chris grinned to himself, liking the way he still had that effect on his lover. "Want me to do that thing you like?"

Chris watched as JC folded his legs up, spreading them and letting him rest in between. "Honey," he said with an indulgent grin, kissing his face tenderly. "'That thing I like' could be just *so* many things ... "

JC blushed. "Well. The one you want it to mean, I guess, then," he murmured, both his hands drifting down over his own hips as he shifted his legs further apart. "Can you lock the door?"

"Does that mean getting up?" asked Chris, then stretched his handn out toward the door. "Maybe I can use the Force ... "

"Baby!" JC laughed, nudging him in the back of his thigh with his heel. "Come on. We aren't even under the covers yet. Or ... here, just roll off. I'll do it, old man."

"I got it, I got it," said Chris, finally getting up to close and lock the bedroom door, then stretching languidly when he had, knowing JC was watching. "That better? Do I get my treat now?"

"What treat?" JC replied, his mouth parted, his hands drifting to touch himself everywhere. "I never promised you a treat. I just ... said I'd do the thing, but that was *before*. You should want to close the door because you don't want anyone coming in here and seeing my naked ass, not because you think you're getting a 'treat'."

"But no one else was home," pouted Chris as he approached the bed and crawled back between JC's legs again. "And besides, are you trying to tell me that Joey *hasn't* already seen your naked ass?"

"We don't know when they *will* be home," JC murmured, wrapping arms and legs tightly around him as soon as he was close enough. "And Joey's never seen my naked ass being abused by you, and I think I want to keep it that way."

"I wouldn't say *abused*," Chris contradicted him, caressing JC's ass with a hand. "Just ... lovingly used. I've certainly never heard any complaints out of you, anyway."

"No, you haven't," JC agreed, smiling. "And you know I love it. I didn't mean that in a ... negative way, baby." He squirmed around underneath him until he was on his belly, looking back over his shoulder and tilting the ass in question up in the air fetchingly. "Please. Use it."

"Jesus," murmured Chris, caressing it again, feeling the soft skin under his fingers. "You do something like that and then expect me to take it slow?" He reached for the condoms and lotion than he knew now had a permanent place next to JC's bed, but just set them next to him as he explored JC's ass. "You're a tiny bit red from last time, still, baby," he said as he gently touched JC's hole. "I'm gonna take it easy, okay? Or ... um ... as easy as I can, anyway ... "

"Okay," JC murmured, not sounding terribly concerned. "Um. Did you want to do it some other way? On our sides again, or ... something?" Chris smiled to see how JC, who was plenty experienced, could still blush so sweetly when he talked about sex."

"Would it be easier on you like that?" he asked, putting a little lotion on his finger before running it around the rim of his hole again. "I'd offer to just use my tongue in you, but I think you want me inside you. And I think I want that, too."

JC smiled over his shoulder, then collapsed on his side. "Um. I was asking for you, baby. If you thought it might be easier not to get as typically ... um. Enthusiastic. Which won't bother me, but I don't want any guilt from you."

"I need to see your face," said Chris softly. "This time, anyway." He let the tip of his finger just penetrate JC's body. "And I'm gonna do this for a while while I convince my body to take it easy this time, okay?"

JC stretched out on his side, tenting one knee up in the air so Chris could still enter his body easily enough. "Want me to, um, do some stuff first, baby? If you're that worried?" His smile was indulgent. "I don't ever mind."

"I'm kind of enjoying this, if you don't mind," he responded as he slipped a little further inside and tugged at the rim gently, opening him up with slow, tender determination. "I'm ... doing good. Just a little excited by you. As always."

JC's eyes finally drifted shut. "You're so sweet," he breathed, his lips parting a little as Chris delved deeper inside. "What'd I do to deserve you taking such good care of me?"

"You take just as good care of me, that's what," said Chris, pouring a bit more lotion on before trying to go deeper. They still had sex a *lot*, and he was starting to be more concerned about what it was doing to JC's body. Even though JC didn't seem to mind one bit. "And that thing you do that I like? That makes up for *every*thing."

JC chuckled, still not opening his eyes. "Well, it should," he teased. "That's for special occasions only. Wouldn't want you getting complacent." He sighed and let his leg fall open wider. "Love you. God. It feels good to say that."

"It's a special occasion, though, right?" said Chris hopefully as he slid his finger all the way inside and leaned over JC's body to kiss him. "Love you," he added, and licked at JC"s lips.

JC laughed again, even as he gasped when CHris found the spot that always made him gasp. "Yes. I'd say that us telling each other how in love we are ... yeah, that's pretty ... special SHIT, Chris. Do that again."

Chris did it again, and with a wide grin on his face. "I'll do that any time you ask," he said. "Except in front of Justin and Joey. Because they think they're hot and heavy but they've got nothing on us."

JC squirmed around Chris's twisting fingers, smiling right back at him. "They're amatuers," he agreed. "But yeah, I'm not interested in giving them any lessons. Chris ... " he blinked. "I'm okay, really. You're not going to hurt me."

"I know you're okay," Chris assured him, driving just a little deeper with two fingers. "Now this is just for you to enjoy. And you can be sure that I *will* be in there soon, with someone a little bigger ... and a little hotter ... and a little more needy for you ... "

JC moaned, and dug his heel into the bed, writhing harder on Chris's hand. "Cuase seeing this, it does nothing for you?"

"No, watching you fuck yourself on my hand almost makes me come on the sheets," said Chris ruefully as he reached with his other hand for the condom. "Okay ... maybe not *all* for you ... "

"That's better," JC breathed, bending the knee of his other leg as it lay flat on the bed. "And that reminds me ... we're still doing that, right? The, uh ... mutual thing, sometime?" Previous message was not received by ncjmarlowe because of error: User ncjmarlowe is not available.

"The, uh ... mutual thing?" repeated Chris uncertainly, thrusting gently, hardly having to do any work, JC was so enthusiastic.

"Um," JC moaned. "The thing. Where ... you know. We watch each other. Or you just watch me. Whatever. The mutual thing." He grunted, and bore down harder on Chris' fingers.

"God yeah," said Chris, twisting his fingers inside JC and really realizing he wasn't hurting in the least. "We're definitely still doing that sometime. *Definitely*."

"Ok, Chris, please," JC panted finally, resting his hand behind the knee he had in the air, holding himself open as his leg shook. "Please, I need more. How do you want me?"

"On your back, baby, on your back," begged Chris, pulling his hand out and trying to help turn him before realizing that JC could take care of himself, and worrying about getting the condom on. "So I can see your eyes."

JC smiled at him, after a brief whimper when Chris removed his fingers. "I like getting to watch your face," he agreed. "The way you bite your lip when you're waiting for me to come, the way your eyes get darker if I moan a certain way ... "

Chris figured his eyes were probably getting darker even without the moan, and grabbed hold of JC's legs so he could move them wider, roll him up fruther so he was exposed to him. "You ready," he asked softly, and actually waited for a response for once.

JC squirmed against his hands, grinning when Chris held him firmly, steady. "Always," he whispered. "*You* ready? You still scared?"

"I'm not scared," said Chris as he slowly entered him, closing his eyes for just a moment as he did. "I don't have to be scared with you, about anything."

"I love you, just *love* you," JC breathed out, when Chris settled deep. It was almost surreal, how easily and frequently JC would say it now, once Chris had said it first. Like he had some backlog of sentiment stored up, waiting for the right time -- or times -- to be let go.

Chris stiffened a little as he opened his eyes again, but kept it under control. "What did I tell you about wha that would do to me?" he teased, not moving yet. Not risking it until he was *sure* he wouldn't just go off.

"And it wasn't even the sexy voice," JC sighed. He hitched his legs higher, making Chris grit his teeth and extend the amount of time he had to wait. "Oh, baby. You have to know you're not going to lose me, the way you make me feel."

"I know that," said Chris softly. "I believe that. I believe in us, JC, because it feels too right." Finally he moved, just a little, only have JC move very enthusiastically back at him.

"Why are you teasing?" JC looked up with big eyes. "Don't. I love you, Chris ... please don't make me wait. Touch me." He tugged forcefully on one of the hands Chris was bracing himself with, pulling it off the bed and laying it on his stomach. "Please."

"I'm not teasing!" Chris gasped out. "I"m trying ... to take this slow ... Jesus .. " He couldn't move for another moment, JC's body writhing against his in ways that made him want to just drive inside him until they came. "Love you. Trying to be good."

JC whimpered and bucked against him again, his persistently hard cock pressing into Chris's stomach. "But," he whimpered. "But. I already tried, I can't, I *can't* right now, Chris ... " "I think you'd appreciate it more if I lasted more than a minute, though," said Chris, taking a few more deep breaths and bracing himself against the bed. "You deserve better than that."

"Always looking out for me," JC replied, stretching up to clasp a hand behind Chris's neck, his hips still moving desperately. "Aren't you. That's how I know you love me, Chris." Then his tongue was in Chris's mouth, slowly massaging *his* tongue.

"Okay ... fuck ... " mumbled Chris into his mouth and finally just started thrusting into him, but with careful, smooth strokes. "I give up. I'll give it to you now, baby ... "

JC laughed, a happy sound that was cut off when he hitched a leg up higher along Chris's ribs. "Oh, GOD, that's good. Chris. Chris, god, I love the way you do me ... love *you* ... " He moaned desperately and nipped at Chris's lips before letting his head collapse back on the bed.

"Sorry," murmured Chris anway. "I'm sorry ... next time, baby, next time I'll go slow ... " There was definitely no going back now, not now that he'd started. It felt too good, to be inside JC, to be making love with him, to watch every expression cross his face.

JC just nodded vigorously, his eyes tightly shut, and moaned. "It's still making love," he breathed. "Even if we can't ... hold back. Maybe ... maybe especially 'cause we can't."

"I know, I know ... " gasped Chris, still trying to maintain control but definitely not stopping. "Love you, JC, so fucking good ... "

"Love *you*, so so much," JC breathed in reply, his eyebrows drawn into a tight line. "Oh. God. I think hearing me say it's gonna make *me* come." He dug his leg into Chris's side harder, and reached around with a free hand to clutch at Chris's ass, pulling him haphazardly deeper.

"JC, I'm *not* going to last, I'm not kidding about that," groaned Chris, thinking it was going to be about a minute now, tops, unless they stopped. And there was no way that was going to happen. "With you, it's just to good. And we both already knew that, I think ... "

"No such thing as too good," JC grunted, tugging Chris's face down closer to his. "And ... what are we waiting for ... exactly?" He shoved his other hand under his own lower back, lifting his hips higher in the air, changing the angle noticeably for both of them.

"Oh god," moaned Chris, throwing his head back. He only managed three more deep thrusts before coming, for once not able to wait for JC to come first. "I'm sorry ... I'm sorry," he mumbled.

JC was still gasping under him as he came, unabashedly reaching his free hand around to grasp at his own cock, stroking it quickly until he was coming too. "Say it," he murmured feverishly. "Say it ... "

"I love you," said Chris, his head shooting back up again to stare into JC's eyes. "I love you, JC."

JC looked desperate, and sated, and happy, and smiled angelically back at him before reaching up with the back of his hand to brush against Chris's cheek. "Me too. And it's not too fast. None of it."

"It's not," agreed Chris, panting. "It's just right, everything is. You ... okay?"

JC sighed, and smiled, and nodded, before pulling his hand back and licking at his coated palm seductively. "I love the way you make love to me, every time. Why wouldn't I be okay?"

Chris smiled at him gratefully. "Slow next time," he promised. "You just make me lose SO much control, when I'm with you. Every time."

"You started it," JC replied, disarmingly casually, before sucking his thumb between his lips. "And stop worrying I'm going to break."

"I *am* gonna break you, one of these times," said Chris, but with a content sigh as he carefully slipped out. "I need to fuck you with my tongue next time, just to sooth it, okay?"

"If you insist," JC smirked, letting Chris roll off him and smearing the rest of the mess into the skin of his stomach. "Although you maybe should tell me why your *tongue* needs soothing ... "

Chris poked him playfully before laying one hand on JC's cheek and kissing him. "You know what I meant," he said. "Your poor, abused ass?"

"Oh, *right*," JC grinned. "That. It's fine, baby." But he cringed a little as he rolled over, squirming until he was comfortably on his stomach. "God. I *love* you. I can't believe I said it."

"We're gonna have to take a break from that," said Chris softly, kissing him again. "Give you a bit of a chance to recover. And JC ... god, JC ... you have no idea what it does to me to *hear* you say it."

JC pouted. "Like, quarantine me? I'm *fine*." He seemed to forget about that, though, when he processed the other things Chris said. "What," he smiled teasingly. "The part where I say I love ytou, how you totally swept me off my feet and made me yours without trying?" Chris grinned at him. "Yeah, that," he said, taking care of the condom before snuggling in closer. "But I was thinking ... about maybe it being time to try you being inside me a couple times ... just to give you a break?"

JC blinked, then turned his head on the pillow to watch Chris carefully. "We could maybe do that," he murmured. "You been thinking about it, baby?" "A little, yeah," said Chris. He wasn't nervous, exactly, but he still got a bit fluttery thinking about it; he knew JC would be good to him. "A little more than i used to."

"You know it's nothing you have to do to prove that you love me, or anything, right?" asked JC softly. "Especially if you've tried it, and didn't like it ... not everyone likes everything ... "

"Trust me, I know that," said Chris, forcibly calming his jumpy nerves. "And yeah, I've tried it, but I've never tried it with you. And if I *still* don't like it, then we don't have to do it anymore and I know you'll be okay with that ... but it wouldn't be fair to either of us if I didn't at least try."

"Okay, shh," JC said soothingly, running his palm down Chris's back and over his ass. "You're sweet. When were you ... I mean. What made you start thinking about this now?" Chris realized JC was trying to ask when he wanted to do it, without sounding crude.

"Because," said Chris, kissing JC's neck in an effort to soothe himself. "We've done it so many times now and every time I think you're gonna say no, gonna say you need a break, you keep taking it and taking it and taking it. Which, um, first of all makes me want to force you to take a break, a little one. And ... it makes me wonder what makes it *so* damn good that you always want to keep on ... " He wasn't sure that answered the question, but he hoped it came pretty damn close.

JC chuckled, leaning his head back to let Chris have more access to his neck. "*You're* so damn good, baby. I'm ... I've never been this, um. Insatiable. With anyone else." He squeezed Chris's thigh gently. "But you're right ... if nothing else, you should get to have someone treat you well. Show you how it *can* be. Even if I'm not a tenth as good at it as you are."

"Well, I've had lots of practice with you," admitted Chris, not agreeing or disagreeing with that; he had no way of knowing, but he couldn't imagine sex with JC as being anything less than perfect. "I don't know how this is gonna turn out, JC ... but it's worth a try ... "

"I'd do anything for you," JC said softly, smiling. "And this isn't even a chore. Would you like to talk about it, a little, so I know where you're coming from? Or are you -- " he leaned over and cupped Chris's cock carefully -- "thinking of trying it? Like, um. Now?"

"Yes. And yes," said Chris, hoping that wasn't too vague. "And, um, yes again. I'm just a little ... unsure, is all. I don't even know if *you* want to ... I mean, for yourself, not for me."

JC smiled at him again, then took Chris's hand and put it over his *own* cock. "I do. Just talking about it's making me all ... you know." He closed his eyes, moaning a little under Chris's fingers. "Plus I love you. I want you to feel close to me, like how I feel close to you when you're inside me."

"I do, already," insisted Chris. "I know that feeling, JC. But I still want to feel it from ... the other perspective, I guess. " His fingers closed around JC's still-goring erection, stroking almost unconsciously. "Nervous as hell, too."

"Chris," JC said firmly, batting at his hand. "You have to know that I will *not* hurt you. I just refuse to. If I even see you *wince*, I'm stopping."

"Well, I wouldn't go that far," said Chris slowly. "I mean, I know you must remember your first few times, and I'm willing to bet there was wincing involved." Which he couldn't say he looked forward to, but he figured it was inevitable.

JC sighed, and buried his face in the pillow. "I know, but ... okay, but I'm stopping if it gets too much. God, Chris ... why does this have to be awkward? It feels weird to be discussing it so ... matter-of-factly."

"It's awkward because *I'm* feeling awkward," admitted Chris with a sheepish grin, tugging him back. "I'm feeling little and awkward and virginal. So how about you take control of this and show me how it's done, okay? Because I *am* looking foward to it, no matter what it seems like right now."

JC glanced at him hesitantly, then braced himself up on his elbow. "I love you. I think you're fucking hot, and I can't wait to get inside you, and it's going to be so hard to go slow when I get to see you spreading for me." He looked serious, studious.

"Good," said Chris. "I want you to be hot for me." He trailed his fingers along JC's erection one last time before letting his hand fall away. He rolled onto his back, still pressed up against JC's side, and let his legs fall open; he knew it wasn't nearly enough, but it was a start. It was enough to give JC the idea that he was ready.

JC sat up on his knees, arching his back and stroking himself slowly once Chris let go. "This might go better if you were hot for me, too, you know," he murmured, although despite his nervousness Chris was mostly hard too.

Chris grinned up at him, actually feeling more calm now that he'd made up his mind to do this. "I thought the me being hot for you thing went without saying," he teased, blowing JC a kiss then staring at how he stroked himself.

"Sometimes the saying part can make it hotter, though," JC smiled, letting his hand drift lower to fondle his own balls a little, then resuming his grip on his cock. "Like me saying that I'm thinking about being in you, my dick deep in you, when you come, and it's making me ache right now ... "

Chris's breathing hitched as JC spoke that way to him. "All you need to do is look in my eyes," he said in a voice that was noticeably lower than normal. "They'll tell you more than my words *ever* could."

JC did, but only for a minute, before swallowing and looking away. "Remember when I tied you up?" he asked quietly. "That first time I had my tongue in you? I needed you so bad after I did that; being inside you with my fingers this time will probably hurt *me*, having to hold back."

"I would have let you, then," admitted Chris, remembering it with a crooked smile. "It gets so easy, when you're making me feel so good, to let you do anything. Just ... anything." He tried to catch JC's eye again. "I'll let you do anything this time, too."

"I know," JC met his eyes quickly. "Okay. Can I ... ?" He finally let go of himself to reach for the lotion Chris had left on the bed, squeezing a more than generous amount into his palm. "Touch yourself, for me, Chris."

Chris didn't hesitate before wrapping his hand around his own erection and letting his legs fall open even wider, so JC would be *able* to do the 'anything' that he was intending. "Okay," he said, surprising himself with how shaky his voice was.

JC smiled, rubbing his hands together, then resting one of his wrists on Chris's knee. "If I look like that when I do it, no wonder you want to watch," he breathed. Chris recognized that JC was fully aware how nervous he was, that his almost-raunchy compliments were his attempt to get his mind off it. Slowly, with a smile still on his face, he reached between Chris's open thighs.

"You look even better," Chris insisted, stroking himself slowly. He didn't want to get too aroused, but the sensations he was giving himself were another distraction, another way to help him relax and let JC do this. He didn't even know yet if the whole thing would work, if he would enjoy it anyway, but he was still convinced that if there was ever anyone to make him enjoy being fucked, it was JC.

JC, meanwhile, was biting his lip in concentration, using feather-light touches around Chris's hole to smear the lotion. "I have real lube in the bathroom," he murmured. "If you think that might make a difference?"

"I think ... this'll be okay," he said quietly. "I mean ... it's *not* exactly my first time. It's just ... you know." The first time it mattered, maybe? The first time it was going to be good?

JC squeezed his knee, then watched Chris touching himself for a moment, before sighing and pressing closer. "Okay, baby. I'm going to go slow, okay?" Chris could feel his fingertip probing at his entrance. "You stop me when you need to."

Chris bit his lip and nodded, tensing only slightly and sliding his hand down to cup his balls for a moment. "Yeah, you go ahead," he said, giving JC a shaky smile. "I *know* you're gonna make it the best thing you can."

With a gentle hand on the inside of Chris's leg, JC worked a single finger inside of Chris slowly, but steadily. Glad that his fingers were skinny, he took the chance at sliding it all the way inside, rather that just halfway before checking with him. And like he knew it would, feeling that constrictive heat around his hand made his cock twitch.

"You're amazing," he breathed. "Feel amazing, look amazing ... "

Chris took a couple of deep breaths before realizing that it didn't hurt. "Oh," he said softly, moving his hips around a little, forcing JC's finger to move with him. "That's ... pretty good, actually." It wasn't a completely unfamiliar sensation, but it was still a little strange, to have someone inside him.

"Good, baby," JC smiled, his face flushing a little when Chris started to move his hips closer. He withdrew his finger just a little, then curled it, wanting this to feel as good for him as possible, as soon as possible, as *much* as possible.

"Oh!" said Chris sharply as the sensation washed over him. His body stilled and he closed his eyes for a moment. "Oh. Oh my God. So that's what that feels like!"

JC's finger paused inside of him. "You've *never* felt that, baby?" he heard him whisper. "God, I'm ... " His voice trailed off. "You just let me take care of you," he said finally, stiltedly. "I'm going to make sure you get treated with the affection and attention you deserve."

"I'm already letting you take care of me," murmured Chris, trying to get JC to make him feel like that again by rocking his hips up. "And you're already doing a great job of it." He wasn't sure why JC was so shocked that he'd never felt that before -- he'd always been conscientious about stimulating it, but didn't most guys just ignore that? -- and he guessed that maybe JC had had some very good lovers before him.

"All the time, though," JC protested, obliging him by pressing against *that* *spot* immediately, and longer. "All the time, you have to let me. I love you, and ... it just sucks that you've been with guys that didn't do this right."

"Oh, Jesus," moaned Chris, pushing against him again and hardly registering his words. "Oh, JC ... *this* is what I do to you?"

JC chuckled, and rubbed him again. "Yes, baby. All the time. Sometimes feels like you aren't even trying, either." He stroked him a little more, then Chris felt his lips on his hip. "You think maybe I can ... ?" With alarm, Chris realized he was actually pulling *out*.

"Can go away?" finished Chris with a worried frown, opening his eyes again. "No, no ... you can't go away, JC. Get back in there ... " He realized how eager he was sounding, a far cry from where he'd been before they'd started.

"No," JC squeezed his knee. "No, I just wanted ... " Chris felt his finger again, just at the ring of muscle, but this time joined by another finger.

"Oh!" said Chris, feeling himself stretch a little further as JC began to penetrate him. It wasn't far, though; JC was obviously looking for his blessing to go ahead. "Um, okay," he said, the nervousness back again. "Yeah ... I know what it'll feel like now. Go ahead."

"Love you, baby," JC sighed, rubbing his thigh hypnotically as he pushed his fingers in deeper -- hitting his prostate right away that time. "I'm not going to hurt you, I promise ... "

Chris gasped again, still not used to that jolt of pleasure that JC gave him every time he went inside his body, No matter what he was feeling, that made everything okay. "Not hurting," he assured him, though he could feel the stretch this time and he was pretty sure that JC could tell that there hadn't really been much in there before him.

Tentatively, Chris could feel JC spreading his fingers, experimenting with how tight his muscles were. "Baby?" he said quietly. "Maybe we should just do this, tonight. Let you get used to it." "That bad?" asked Chris softly, lifting his head a little to watch JC's face. It wasn't telling him much, though. "I'm, um, sorry. We don't have to if you don't want to." Then he lay back down on the bed and closed his eyes again so he didn't have to see JC if he decided to pull out entirely. It felt so good he didn't want to lose it .. but a small part of him also thought maybe JC was right.

JC did pull out, but Chris could tell he didn't go far. "I just ... you're really tight. ANd I can tell you're still nervous, and that ... makes it a little tougher. It's up to you, I just ... maybe if we just do this, every once in a while, until I can do it without making you uncomfortable?"

"I've never disappointed anyone in bed before," said Chris with a soft sigh, opening his eyes but looking away. He still wasn't sure he wanted to see the look on JC's face. "Can we just keep doing that at least, though. I'm ... um, I'm missing you already ... "

JC didn't oblige, not right away at least; instead, he slipped up his body until Chris was forced to look at him. "What part of that," he said solemnly, "makes you think you're disappointing me in bed? If anything, I'm obviously not doing *my* part to help you relax enough ... "

Chris smiled at him, he couldn't help it. "Because, unlike every single other thing we've done together, that wasn't just easy for us. And I *am* sorry for that ... but I'm still hoping it will be, soon, because you make it feel really good, JC ... "

"I can keep going," JC said softly, kissing him. "If that's what you want, baby. I just didn't want it to hurt ... " As he was talking, he slid both fingers deep inside Chris once more.

Chris gasped, his eyes still on JC and shooting open even wider. He didn't know how he did it, slid into him so easily and made it feel so good, every time. "Um ... yeah. Let's do this, for a while."

JC mumured his assent, then leaned over to kiss him again as he brought his fingers out slightly, then moved them back in gently. He reached down with his other hand to cup Chris's ass, picking him up off the bed carefully.

"Do you want me to suck you off after?" asked Chris as he let JC manipulate his body however he wanted. "I mean ... to make up for it?"

"What are you *talking* about," JC muttered, dipping his head to suck on Chris's neck. He could *feel* the way JC's body was humming with the strain of holding back, still. "This is fine. You don't need to make up for anything we do in bed, baby ... "

"I want to make you feel as good as you're making me feel," insisted Chris, starting to push back against him again. "Surely you know *that* about me by now ... "

"You *do*," JC insisted, stretching him carefully once more. "God. Are you trying to tell me that you don't think you do things to me in bed that I feel like I can never make up for???"

"I'm not *that* good," laughed Chris happily, finally relaxing further without the knowledge hanging over the head that something was going to be painful soon. "Oh ... oh! Do that again!"

JC bent his head to kiss him as he flexed his fingers one more time, causing another jolt to go through Chris's body. "Yeah, you like that?" he whispered against his lips, pressing his fingers a little harder against the walls of Chris's body.

"I like that a lot," admitted Chris, tilting his body up to kiss him again. "I like that a lot more than I thought I could. I knew you'd be the one, JC ... I knew you could do this for me ... "

"I'll do anything for you that you want me to," JC reminded him, lifting Chris's ass off the bed again, the wrist of his other hand brushing against Chris's cock as he moved his fingers inside him gently. "And I love you; you've never been with anyone that loves you as much as I do. Or as much as I'm learning to. I promise you."

"I know that," said Chris, moaning softly as JC continued to stretch him out, Even if it was done without the intent of taking it further, it still felt wonderful. More wonderful than he thought it could. "And we wouldn't be doing this if I didn't love you enough to let you. But oh, JC ... I think maybe know I know why you li ke it so much ... "

"You're getting there." Chris could hear the smile in JC's voice. "But like I said, I'm not half as good at this as you are, so it's not a fair comparison ... " His kisses were distracting as he kept moving, even thrusting a little, but so gently that it was still smooth.

"I doubt that," said Chris, reaching down to finally wrap a hand around his erection again. If JC was going to keep doing this, he was going to come. He was almost positive of that now. "I doubt i could be better than you at this ... though I *have* had a lot of practice, I have to admit. I have this great boyfriend who lets me do it to him all the time ... "

"This great boyfriend of yours probably dreams every night about you doing this to him," JC muttered, nipping at Chris's ear, curling his fingers haphazardly so Chris couldn't quite predict when he'd feel that sharp jolt next. "Among other things."

"What other things?" Chris gasped out, stroking himself a little more purposefully, his body in constant motion against JC's hand now. "Tell me."

"Tell you?" JC echoed, right into his ear. "Tell you about the nights we've spent apart, how I've woken up and had to do what I'm doing to you now, to myself, because I'm so hard thinking about being fucked by you? Or having your tongue in me? Having my legs up on your shoulders, not being able to buck up against you the way I always want to ... ?"

Chris groaned unabashedly this time, that image firmly burned into his brain. "Your fingers are so fucking perfect," he muttered and JC caused his body to tremble again, pushing him to the brink of orgasm. "YOU are so fucking good."

"Is this doing it for you, baby?" JC hissed, sounding turned on himself, and eager, and anxious. "You want me to stop; want me to suck you?"

"Whatever you do," said Chris, shooting JC a look full of desperation. "Don't stop. *Please* don't stop. That's so good ... more than I ever thought ... and I'm gonna come in about two seconds ... "

"This sucks," JC replied shakily, fingering Chris with sustained enthusiasm. "God. *Now* I want in you, so bad." He moved his other hand from Chris's hip to tangle with the one Chris was jerking himself with, teasing him.

"Next time ... next time ... " promised Chris. "Oh *God* JC ... " He came with a jolt, all over both of their hands, all over his stomach, moaning loudly and arching his back and all but throwing himself against JC's hand one last time. And he meant it ... the next time he *did* want JC inside him, because if it was good now, it was going to blow his mind when they were actually fucking.

"Fuck," JC gasped, and Chris knew exactly what it felt like, to have someone coming on your hand like that. He kept his fingers in him as he slipped down between his legs, eagerly lapping at the juices cooling on Chris's abdomen.

Chris took more than a couple moments to catch his breath, and almost felt like he wanted to cry except that there were no tears. Only this thick, huge feeling inside of him. Instead of letting that overwhelm him, he focused on the physical sensations -- JC's tongue on his body, JC's fingers still inside him, his own heard still pounding in his chest.

"I love you," he said finally, when he could speak again. "I don't think ... you can possibly have any idea what a gift you just gave me ... "

JC looked up from what he was doing, meeting Chris's eyes and licking his lips. "I should've done this so long ago," he protested, with quiet passion. "For both of us, I should've."

"This?" You mean .... *this*? No," said Chris softly, reaching out with a shaky hand for JC's hair. "I was ready today. I was ready to let you. And now from today on we can share that, too." He started grinning as he stroked the soft, slightly damp stands. "Of course, I still plan to fuck you silly whenever you'll let me."

"I always let you," JC laughed, and his voice was shaky too. "*You're* the one that was being stubborn, and said we had to be on a break ... " He finally, tentatively, pulled his fingers out of Chris's body and leaned over the bed to grab his tee shirt before stretching out beside him.

"And aren't you glad I did?" asked Chris, shifting his hips and feeling strange and empty now that JC was gone. "Just ... gimme a few minutes and I can, um, make sure you're happy." He tangled his fingers in JC's hair and closed his eyes as he tried to pull himself together enough to be of any use.

JC chuckled again, wiping off his hands and then rolling over to squeeze them under Chris's back. "Shh. That's okay. Don't worry about it ... I'm happy. Believe me, I'm happy. We both don't have to come our brains out *all* the time ... "

"We don't?" said Chris, opening his eyes again just to feign innocence. "Someone should have told us sooner." But he took JC's assurances to heart and curled up against him rather than trying to do anything else.

JC kissed him softly. "We don't," he repeated. "I love you. Making you come like that, for the first time maybe, that was as good as an orgasm. Mostly."

Chris grinned at him contentedly. "Mostly?" he repeated back at him. "I told you baby, just give me a few minutes ... I hate to leave you wanting. I *do* have a reputation to uphold, after all." Or maybe more than a few minutes; it was more the emotional impact of what they'd done, though, not the physical.

"You're not leaving me wanting," JC protested quietly, but his needy cock pressed against Chris's thigh seemed to indicate otherwise. "Seriously, I promise. Want to take a nap before dinner? Or ... I didn't even get a chance to ask you why you were early."

"Maybe I just wanted to see you," said Chris, rubbing his body against JC's slowly. "Maybe I can't stop thinking about you, either. And maybe ... um ... I forgot I was supposed to stop at my apartment after my meeting."

JC chuckled, turning his body away from Chris's slightly. "Want me to see if Joey left his keys in his embarrassed rush to take off earlier? I can take you by your place, you can get your toothbrush ... "

"Mmm, later," said Chris, tugging him closer again. "I don't need it right *now*, do I? I just need to stop by and feed Rocky and show him a little love."

JC made a face and pushed weakly at Chris. "Ew. You have to take a bath before you kiss me again, then. Haven't I given you your ultimatum about that damn cat yet?"

"What? The poor thing misses me now that I'm here all the time," he said, giving JC a pretty pout that he knew would get him his way. "I need to show him love when I stop by. I need to show him *extra* love."

Wincing again, JC let his head fall back on the pillow. "Fine. I see how it is. But I'm waiting in the car this time. Last time she practically sat in my face. Why do cats only act affectionate with people that don't like them?"

Chris pouted bigger and sniffled. "But Rocky luvs you," he said, kissing JC's face, then sighing. "My mom said Rocky could go and stay with them now ... my youngest sister has been asking for a pet lately and she says it beats getting the dog that she's been eyeing." He curled his body around JC's again and pressed up against him, still determined to make sure he was satisfied.

JC pushed at Chris more firmly this time, putting enough distance between their faces so he could study his expression. "What? Chris, I ... I was just kidding. I promise. I don't want you to get rid of your cat for me. I *promise* that's not what I was trying to get you to do ... "

Chris leaned back in to nuzzle him again. "Mmm, we'll see," he said. It was nice of JC to offer that, but he saw how sick he got around Rocky and he had to consider it. But right now ... it didn't matter so much. They were in JC's house ... in JC's bed ... and there were more urgent things to attend to.

But JC was still frowning. "Chris. *Chris*. I'm serious ... is this because you don't like being over here? Or ... I mean, it's not because of what you walked in on today, is it??"

"What?" said Chris quickly, pulling back himself this time. "JC, of *course* not. I just ... I don't want to make a big deal out of it. I'm with you just about all the time now, and if I'm here then I'm completely neglecting him and if I"m there then I'm either *not* with you, or you're sneezing and sniffling. This has nothing to do with anything but that, okay?"

"Okay," JC whispered, burying his face in Chris's neck. "Okay, when you say it that way, it makes sense. You're very sweet ... really. That was the nicest thing anyone's offered to do for me in a long time. Even if it wasn't just for me."

"That can't be the nicest thing," said Chris softly, kissing JC's hair and stroking his side with one hand. "I'd still get to see him all the time. And so would you, actually, when mom had you over for dinner every week. But at least he wouldn't sleep on your face, right? So are we good now?"

JC snuffled against him. "*Close* to the nicest thing, then," he relented. "And we're good. Thank you, baby. I guess I was just still worried you'd decide to get upset about Joey ... "

"I'm not going to get upset about Joey," Chris insisted, stroking his body a little further down and caressing his ass. "I know you guys are just friends. And I know you and me are a lot more than that. And I'm definitely not going to let a cat -- no matter how cute and cuddly and loving -- get in the way of that."

"Okay, okay, I don't hate the cat," JC relented. "Sheesh. So, um ...well. That's good, about Joey. 'Cause you're right ... we *are* so much more than that. I love him, but I *love* you, and I'm *in* love with you, and right now my brain's still trying to wrap around that."

"Give it time," said Chris with a smile that he just couldn't keep of fhis face, no matter how much he tried. "It seems that we're going to have a lot of that, you and me. So how about right now ... you just relax, and while I try to wrap *my* brain around how you just made being inside my ass feel amazing, I can at least take care of *you*."

"You're so stubborn," JC protested, but Chris could tell he was flattered, and still excited. "I already told you" -- he arched his back -- "that you don't have to 'take care' of me. We're supposed to share sex."

"Exactly," said Chris, rolling his eyes at him playfully. He was certainly no more stubborn than JC was. "And I would like to share my mouth with your dick. Do you mind?"

"I don't ... think there's a good way to say no to that," JC mused, his face flushed. "It's just -- Chris, you don't *have* to. Especially if you're still trying to, um. Recuperate, or whatever. We can just lay here together ... "

"Don't worry," said Chris with a wink at him, beginning to move down his body. "I'll get you off in about two minutes flat, and then we can *both* just relax and lay together, how about? And sheesh, JC ... since when is using my mouth on you -- using my mouth on you *anywhere* -- a chore for me?"

"But," protested JC. "But ... " He couldn't seem to find any more words, though, when Chris started to settle between his legs. His erection was huge, and needy, and Chris couldn't believe he'd balked as long as he had while trying to deal with it. And figured two minutes might be an overestimate.

"Shush," he said playfully, tapping JC's hip with the flat of hi s hand, then finally gave him what he'd obviously been needing. He ran his tongue everywhere along his length, holding JC down as he tried to buch up against him. "Shhhh," he said again, more soothingly, then finally took the head into his mouth and sucked gently.

"Oh, please," JC blurted, obviously straining to not shove his hips into Chris's face. "God, please. I want ... can ... " He was biting his lip so hard Chris was truly worried he'd cut himself, and his expression was honestly pained.

Chris slid further down on him, sucking harder, curling the fingers of one hand around the base of JC's erection.Then let go of his hip and braced himself, letting JC do whatever he needed to do.

JC did thrust into him, once, then started pushing -- hard -- on Chris's shoulders. "No," he protested. "No, no. Chris, stop. I don't ... this isn't what I want ... stop. Please, stop."

Chris pulled off of him and backed away, hurt and confused, letting go of his entirely. He wiped his mouth of the back of hs hand as he just watched JC's face.

JC opened his eyes, and flinched at whatever he saw in Chris's expression. "I'm sorry," he panted, reaching for him. "I'm sorry, I just ... really wanted to ... be inside you. And I never really feel like doing it, but when I do, I just ... can't think about anything else. So ... please don't, baby. We'll wait. I'll wait."

Chris nodded slowly, but he knew his expression didn't change much. "Just don't tell me I didn't disappoint you, okay? Because it's pretty obvious that I did." He sighed quietly and looked away and thought about everything he could have done differently do that they wouldn't have ever come to this point. Because he didn't ever want to feel this again.

"You fucking *didn't*," JC said tightly, withdrawing his hands and pushing himself up to a sitting a position. "*I* stopped us, earlier. And I'd do it again, for the same reasons. But I'm *sorry* for stopping you now, Jesus ... don't you ever have that feeling? Where something feels amazing but it wasn't what you'd already been preparing yourself for?"

"Yeah, and I can't *give* you that," Chris snapped back in frustration. "I can't give you what you really wanted. And I'm fucking sorry that nothing else I could do can make up for it."

"I *tried* to tell you that you didn't have to, before you started anything. Even *after* you started it," JC snarled in return, after looking completely taken aback by Chris's tone. "Shit, Chris. Try and read between the lines sometime, God." He swung his long legs over the side of the bed. "I'm taking a shower."

"Fine," said Chris, lying back and closing his eyes, wishing he could just sink into the bed for a while. "Fine, just ... do that. Do you want me to go or something? I do still have a place I can go back to if you don't want me around when you come back out."

"Chris," he sighed, after pausing a minute. "I *always* want you around. No matter what. I just ... was trying to *not* hurt you, but you kept pushing ... I'm sorry. Should I have just let you? We're so good in bed, baby, I don't want to start being ... not-forthcoming, or whatever ... "

"Well Jesus, JC," said Chris with a sigh, opening his eyes to look at him. "We were lying there with your dick digging into my leg and it *wasn't* going down. At all. Was I supposed to just ignore that and be selfish and just lay there?"

"That wouldn't have been selfish," JC said meekly, sitting back down and reaching for Chris's leg. "Not since I kept telling you that you didn't have to. I guess maybe ... I don't know ... maybe I was hoping that you'd change your mind, or whatever, seeing how hard I was, still. I don't know any other reason why I was still so ... um. Aroused."

"Change my mind?" said Chris, still really unsure of how all of this had happened. "But you were the one who suggested in the first place that we wait ... that i probably wouldn't have been ready ... And, I mean, I agreed with you, but still ... you suggested it first, JC. So what else was I supposed to do?"

JC looked down at his hands. "I don't know. I'm sorry, I'm so bad at this. I don't know how to ask to fuck someone, I never have. Maybe I thought ... maybe I thought you enjoyed it so much, that if I just waited for you to recover a little, you'd want it too." He blushed. "I'm sorry, I feel like an asshole. And an idiot."

"No, you're not," said Chris with a sigh. "Fuck. Okay, c'mere." When JC didn't move, Chris tugged on him. "I said c'mere, you goof. It's okay, all right? I *did* enjoy it that much and we *are* gonna do that because I can't wait to see how it feels, with you, but it's my body that's just not ready yet. Not my mind. Not my willingness. Okay?"

JC shook his head. "I'm sorry. I can't believe our first fight is over this. I'm really ... shit." He exhaled shakily. "Just tell me you forgive me, or you *will* forgive me, and I'll go take that shower."

"Forgive you for what?" asked Chris, quite seriously, tugging on him again. "Look, let's agree that no one in this bed needs forgiveness right now, okay? It's just ... growing pains. That's all."

"Okay," JC said softly. "I'm sorry, Chris. Sometimes the fact that I never have boyfriends really rears up and bites me on the ass." He leaned over and kissed him, but it was hesitant, timid. "I love you ... "

"I love you right back," said Chris, kissing him more firmly and feeling a lot more in control of the whole thing now. No one had meant any harm, and he gave himself a mental smack for not being able to keep that in mind all along. But sometimes, when emotions ran too high, it was hard to keep sight of things like that. "And everything's fine. It was just a little ... thing. Whatever. It's not important now."

"Thank you," JC murmured, curling against him then and running an insistent hand down Chris's side. "Are you staying, then? Please? After I take you home so you can feed Rocky?"

"Of course I'm staying," he said, surprised at the questions but also pleased at how close JC was getting again. "Why wouldn't I stay? I mean, wasn't that the plan for tonight, for me to stay?"

"That was the plan," JC repeated. "That doesn't mean you aren't thinking that you need to be alone, now, though. Or away from your insensitive and selfish lover." JC sounded angrier with himself than Chris had ever heard him, but he was still touching him tenderly despite it.

"I don't have an insensitive and selfish lover," said Chris simply, hoping that would get through to him, "so obviously I have nothing to get away from. So are you gonna let me shower with you or what?"

JC sighed, but thankfully didn't protest. "Of course," he said quietly, pushing himself up and holding out his hand. "Unless you wanted a bath, instead, baby?"

Chris considered that. "Actually, that would be really great," he said finally. "If that's okay with you. I'm a little -- " He thought about how to describe it. " -- I'm not *sore*, but I'm ... stretchy. You know? And I like playing with you in the bath anyway."

That, at least, coaxed a smile from JC. "Joey stole back his rubber ducky," he murmured. "You better be careful where you leave it next time." Leaning over, he wrapped Chris in a tight hug, something he rarely did. "I love you," he murmured into his shoulder. "I'm so glad we can work through this. Anything."

"Of course we can," said Chris, holding him back gratefully. "Was there every any doubt? Every couple has these growing pain things when they first get together. I mean, we don't know *every*thing about each other." He kissed JC's ear. "Yet, anyway."

JC giggled and blushed. "You might get scared," he teased. "But by then it'll be too late. I'll have you so enthralled you'll think all my bad qualities are, like, quirky. Or cute or something."

"You mean they aren't?" he asked innocently, rubbing JC's side and ass with one hand while he curled the other in JC's hair. "Damn. Well, it's already too late. I'm smitten."

"They're not," JC shook his head, blinking with big eyes at Chris as he nuzzled into his hand. "And you know you're supposed to kiss me, when you start playing with my hair. It's one of the rules. And those are cute and quirky too."

Chris kissed him obediently, wondering if JC knew what a soothing effect playing with his hair had. On both of them, really. "Maybe it's just everything about us is cute and quirky. I think I could live with that."

JC smiled and tugged on Chris's hand. The one that wasn't tangled in his curls. "C'mon. Bath. Before Joey gets home, 'cause I don't think 'cute' and 'quirky' are the words he'd use."

"No, he tends more towards 'juvenile' and 'kinky' and 'sickening'," admitted Chris. "Though I'm sure he means the same thing by it, deep down." He let JC tug him off the bed, but they didn't make it out of the room before they were kissing again.

"Chris," JC protested, even as he pulled him closer, moaning into his mouth. "Don't. Come on ... if we don't go rinse off, we're going to end up fucking for hours in the hall, and your cat's going to starve, and we're going to scar Joey, and maybe Justin ... "

"We're only going to scar Joey -- and maybe Justin -- if they see what's in your drawer. Anything we could possibly do in the hallway is nothing they haven't seen before. Or done, for that matter." He grabbed JC up and kissed him again. "I was thinking ... after the bath ... we could try things with me again? I'm bound to be much more relaxed ... "

JC groaned deeper. "But ... the cat ... " he reminded him weakly, as one hand clutched at Chris's hip and the other brushed across his jaw -- and just like that, at just the *mention* of letting him fuck him, Chris could feel JC getting hard again.

"You know as well as I do that we're not just going to get dressed and leave after taking a bath together anyway. Our only hope of seeing Rocky tonight is if we go *now*. And even then, considering we're already naked ... it's a long shot. We can go late tonight, or I can call my mom to stop by and take care of it." He kissed JC and pressed up against him, happy that the sexual vibe was definitely still very alive. "Just being realistic."

"This is hopeless," JC protested, breathing hard and squeezing Chris's hip, almost painfully, as he tried to walk them both out the door. "How am I supposed to be the responsible one, with you kissing me like that?"

Chris held himself back a little. He'd wanted to tell JC he didn't need to be the responsible one, but right now it was kinda true that they *both* did, if they wanted to get all the way through this.

"You're right," he said as he helped them out the door, toward the bathroom. "It's utterly hopeless. I'll call my mom later."

JC laughed as they stumbled down the hall. "That wasn't what I *meant*," he cried, stopping to kiss Chris back every couple of feet. "That was more of a cue for you to stop kissing me, so we didn't have to impose on anyone ... "

"But you don't *actually* want me to stop kissing you, right?" teased Chris. "You actually want me to keep kissing you, and you'd actually like very much to forget about Rocky so you can have me all to yourself, all night."

"Oh, is that what I want?" JC breathed, still grinning. "Well, it's good to know that having a boyfriend hasn't made me lose my ability to think for myself." He detached himself from Chris enough to push him in the bathroom ahead of him, and close the door. "You realize you're trapped, now, right?"

"Yes," said Chris with a smile. "And I'm just fine with that, in case you hadn't noticed. So ... is it time to ravish you yet or do I have to wait until the tub's full?" He had the feeling that just one good round of sex would erase the memory of the unease of the last time.

JC grinned devilishly, and shook his head, his hands placed flat on the back of the door behind him. "Nope. Neither. *You* said we weren't allowed to do that for a little while. *You* said I had to rest."

"O-kay," said Chris, drawing out the word and feigning resignation. "I guess I can stand to just tongue fuck you a couple times in the tub, to help you get all rested. A little saliva never hurt anyone. And I think a finger or two would be okay while we're giving your ass a well-deserved rest. That's not too big for you ... " He bit his lip which he pretended to consider that. "No, maybe just tongue after all."

But JC shook his head again, pushing away from the door to brush by Chris and bend over to turn on the water. "Nope. Not doing that either. See, cause the second you touch me there, with any part of your body, I won't be satisfied until you're fucking me absolutely raw ... "

Chris sniffled and pouted at him, and knew that JC would know what he was doing even though he couldn't see. "So what are we going to *do* then?" he asked, "Since you don't want to let me get you off ... ?"

"Oh, I'll be getting off," JC said casually, not even turning around as he reached behind himself for the Mr. Bubbles Chris had bought for him. "Don't you worry about that. Just sit yourself in the tub and wait."

"Wait for what?" asked Chris a little warily now, eyeing JC strangely. This definitely wasn't normal behaviour for his boyfriend, but he couldn't tell what was up. "What are we doing?"

"For me," JC explained, finally looking over his shoulder at Chris to nod his head at the tub invitingly. "We're taking a bath. I'm not letting you distract me from what you promised me in the bedroom. So I'm making you take a bath and keep your hands -- and all other body parts -- to yourself until we're done. Got it? I'm being strong, here."

Chris grinned at him, testing the water with his toe. "Okay," he said quietly. "I'm not gonna back out on it, though. You ... you don't need to worry about that. I don't know how far we'll get but I'm sure as hell gonna follow through with what I promised."

"Yes, you are," JC said firmly, and Chris had to smile at that; he knew JC would make them stop far before he would, regardless of how bossy he was trying to act at the moment. "So get in and shut up, so we can get this part out of the way." He slapped Chris's ass teasingly.

"Well, we can enjoy *this* part, too," Chris insisted as he slipped into the water, trying to get JC to follow him. "You're gonna wash me, right? All over? Even on my naughty bits?"

"Nope," JC grinned, tossing him a washcloth and laughing went it sent a bunch of bubbles flying up in Chris's face. "Well, no. I might. But you're not touching me." He sat on the edge of the tub and grabbed for the washcloth again.

Chris sighed and watched him, but was obedient. That didn't stop him from pouting though. "You're supposed to make bathtime fun, in lieu of rubber ducky," he complained teasingly.

"Just think about how I'm going to make you scream," JC murmured, wringing out the washcloth and batting Chris's wandering hand away before picking him his knee and rubbing at his thigh gently. "That's always fun for me."

"Oh trust me," said Chris with a shuddery sigh, his own body already past the beginnings of arousal. "I'm not thinking about much else right now. Man ... I feel like I'm the main dish at a feast and you have me soaking to tenderize me ... "

JC laughed and let his hand drift further between Chris's legs. "Now *there's* an image," he smiled. "We can maybe work something out where I nibble on you a bit, first." He looked at him and bit his lip, then pulled the washcloth back and ran it down his own legs.

"You know," said Chris, making an effort to bat his eyelashes at JC. "If you, say, wanted to play with me while I was underwater ... that might help me loosen up even more ... " He was pretty sure it would be a fruitless suggestion at this point, but it was fun keeping JC off balance anyway.

JC just shook his head, smiling, but he did slip into the tub between Chris's legs. "You'll be loose by the time we get there," he promised. "Or ... nobody's stopping you from playing with yourself."

Chris stared at him, unsure of whether or not he was seriously not going to touch him, then finally sighed. "Well, I guess I'll have to, then," he said, snaking a hand between his legs, all the while keeping his eyes on JC.

JC smiled indulgently and proceeded to grab the soap, lathering up the washcloth. If it weren't for the way his knuckles were turning almost white, and the tenseness in his shoulders, Chris would have actually thought JC was completely unaffected. "I guess so."

"You might have to help me out a little," said Chris quietly, closing his eyes and parting his lips, knowing JC was watching him. "I've never done this to myself before ... I might need some advice ... "

"I'm busy," JC murmured, but Chris could see the way his own motions slowed, the way his lips parted as he watched Chris's hands carefully. "You'll need to ... um ... trial and error ... yeah."

"Mmm," Chris moaned, more for show than anything as he ran the tip of his finger over his hole. This really *was* something that he hadn't done to -- or *for* -- himself before and right now he was really, really wondering why. Except maybe that he'd been convinced a long time ago that it wasn't something that he'd enjoy, and he'd believed that for far too long. "Yeah, that feels good ... " he murmured.

JC stared for several more seconds before shaking his head and grabbing Chris's wrist. "Okay," he said tightly. "Okay, stop. You can't do that in here, not without something to make it go in easier. I don't want you to hurt yourself." Chris had to suppress another smirk; of course, it wasn't just that JC didn't want him starting without him, or anything.

"I'm just touching," complained Chris with another pout that he hoped was at least a little pretty. "I wasn't gonna go inside or anything. Well, not *much* anyway ... that's *your* job. I was just playing with it." And as he said that he did it again, brushing his finger over and moaning softly.

He could pratically hear JC grind his teeth before he threw the washcloth at him and stood up in the tub, water dripping off his stomach and legs and hard-again cock. "You have until I dry off to finish," he said, obviously trying to be menacing but too cute to pull it off.

"Finish what?" asked Chris, blinking at him innocently. "I'm just playing. It would be more fun if you played *with* me though ... " He blew some bubbles at JC before grinning at him mischievously. "What's the point of taking a bath together if we aren't going to play?"

"Bath's done," JC said shortly. "Finish *cleaning*. You know what I meant." He stepped out of the tub, onto the bathmat, and grabbed a thick towel. "I got ... distracted. With other things. We can have a playful bath later."

Chris sighed dramatically, but really did finish cleaning himself. JC looked kinda serious that time, and a playful bath later would be fun, too. " Once we get into bed, are you going to take care of me? I might be convinced to retract my position on fucking you, after ... "

"Define take care of you," JC murmured, wiping down his legs, and then wrapping the terrycloth around his waist.

"Take care of me like use your fingers inside me and stretch me out and then maybe make love to me. That kind of take care of me. Are you going to do that?" He finally stood up, and grinned as he looked down at the bubbles that clung to him but failed to conceal his erection.

JC followed his gaze down and Chris saw the hint of a smile. "Oh. THAT kind of take care of you. Yes. Yes, that I will do." He reached over and got a towel for Chris, approaching him slowly. "You look cute like that, baby."

"Is there another kind of take care of me that you might do, too?" asked Chris, looking down at himself again and thinking that if there ever was something to blush at, it was his boyfriend calling him cute when he had bubbles on his dick. "Because, you know, if there was, that would be okay, too ... "

"No," JC said simply. "No, I liked your version. I just doubt seriously that it's going to leave either of us in a position to have you fuck me after .. not if it goes the way I want it to." He wrapped the towel around his back, then tugged on the ends so Chris was jerked flush against his body. "Like, *seriously* doubt."

Chris grinned at him, having to look up a little now. "I'm fine with that," he said. "Less temptation to do things to your body that I promised I wouldn't 'til I'd given you a day or two to recover. You ... ready?"

"*You* ready?" JC replied, grinning down at him. "Shit, I'm not even letting you dry off. Forget it. Come on." He helped him out of the tub and kept his hands on him as he led him down the hall, completely unconcerned with the mess of bubbles Chris left trailing behind them.

"We're gonna have to change the sheets after," joked Chris, only a little tiny bit nervously, as JC led him back into the bedroom. "And probably the rest of the blankets too. But yeah ... " He gave JC a steady look and a genuine smile. "I'm ready."

JC pushed him down onto the bed, still seeming determined, most likely realizing this would be easiest if they both stayed as worked up as they had been in the bathroom. "Well, good to know," he murmured. "Even though I would've worked pretty hard to convince you anyway."

Chris could feel the water and bubbles soaking into the blankets but he didn't care, not with JC looking at him the way he was, not knowing what was coming. He slipped a hand between his legs again, just to see the look on JC's face when he did.

"In fact," he said, squirming as his finger just lightly brushed against his hole, "I'm *very* ready."

"Um ... " JC stuttered, backing off him immediately even as he stared at Chris's hand. "Hold on. I gotta ... get something." He backed up to the door, bumping his shoulder against it as he walked through. "Be right back."

"JC, we have every--" Chris tried to call after him, but he was already out the door. He closed his eyes instead and continued touching himself gently; it hadn't *all* been for show and it was an interesting sensation. And a pleasant way to pass the time until JC came back.

He wasn't gone long; breathing a little harder when he re-entered the room and shut the door behind him -- locking it carefully. "Sorry," he panted, holding up a small tube. "Real lube this time." He narrowed his eyes at Chris's hand. "Unless you're happy doing that yourself ... ?"

Chris looked at him and smiled. "Oh," he said, surprised and pleased by the consideration JC was showing him, especially with how aroused he already was. "I'm just ... " He pulled his head away, more reluctantly than he'd expected. "Waiting for you."

"Damn straight," he muttered, then winked, because JC couldn't keep a surly expression long around Chris. "So, um ... " he started, walking carefully to the bed. "Did you enjoy your bath? You look like ... I don't know, you went to one of those raves, with the foam ... "

Chris grinned a little wider. "Hey, whatever it takes to get you to ravish me," he teased, spreading his legs a little wider. Now that he knew what to expect, what JC would make it feel like, he wasn't trembling anymore. Not from nerves, anyway.

"Doesn't take much to get me to want to," JC admitted, kneeling next to him, reaching between his legs immediately and stroking his inner thigh. "You know something? I think I'm more attracted to you than anyone I've ever met. You're beautiful."

Chris made a face at him, despite being flattered. "You're the beautiful one," he said, shivering under JC's light touch. "I'm the funny one. Get it straight." It made him feel warm, though, to think of JC being *that* attracted to him. Warm emotionally and flushed with arousal.

JC shook his head at him, wouldn't play along. "It's not up for discussion," he mumbled, before leaning over finally, pressing their damp bodies together and licking broadly at Chris's neck. His hands were still resting on either side of his own hips, palming Chris's thighs.

"Yeah," said Chris, his voice a little shaky. "I think the time for discussion is over anyway." He couldn't move much, not the way JC was pinning him down and holding his legs wide, but he was able to coax JC to find his lips and kiss them until they were reddened and wet.

"I do like talking to you, though," JC whispered, nuzzling his jaw as they both breathed heavily. "Telling you how, in a second, I'm gonna slide down your body, start licking between your legs ... hopefully, get you wanting more than just my tongue ... "

"Yeah, okay, do that," said Chris, involuntarily flexing the muscles of his legs and ass. "Um, and since you can't talk while you're doing that ... maybe I should try talking to you. No poetry, though ... I'm not sure what would be appropriate when you have your tongue in my ass ... "

"No poetry," JC agreed. "You always do ones about girls." True to his word, he slipped down Chris's frame, trailing his tongue along his skin as he did, letting the thumb of one of his hands inch over to tease at his hole. "I prefer when you say things like: 'fuck, nobody does it better than you, JC.' Stuff like that."

"Nobody *does* do it better than you, JC," he said, lifting his hips to make it easier on him. "Forgive me for trying to find a poetic way to tell you that. Would you prefer it spit out in grunts and gasps and moans, maybe?"

"I dunno, I kind of like it," JC admitted, pushing Chris's legs wider firmly, settling between them, and then without any warning, plunging his tongue deep inside Chris's ass.

Chris jerked involuntarily, hissing instead of saying what he meant to. A moment later he couldn't even remember the words he's meant to say in the first place. He reached for JC's hair, knowing that running his fingers through it would calm his heart down to the point where he could bear it again.

"Yeah," he said finally. "Fuck ... *yeah*, JC. That."

JC moaned, too, against his ass, pushing deeper, shoving Chris's thighs up higher with his shoulders. He reached around with one of his hands to grip the top of his leg, then used it to help Chris wrap it around his neck.

"Careful I don't hurt you," murmured Chris, feeling the tingles from what JC was doing go straight up his spine. "I ... don't have much control anymore ... " But that in itself was definitely part of the excitement.

JC pulled away long enough to whisper "just *enjoy* it" to him, then used his saliva-slick thumb to hold him open slightly so he could delve in even deeper. Chris could *feel* him flicking his tongue animatedly, and he reminded himself that this was something he enjoyed doing too ... it shouldn't be a surprise that JC liked it.

Chris moaned loudly, both because he couldn't help it and because he remembered just *why* he liiked doing it so much -- he loved hearing what it did to the person he was with. He couldn't believe how deep JC was getting, and how good he was making him feel even without trigging the amazing sensations he had earlier.

Too soon, it seemed, he pulled out again, peeking over Chris's groin to smile and lick his lips at him. His thumb was still there, slipping in deeper to take the place of his tongue, and he curled it teasingly. "Some day, I might do that to you until you come."

Chris knew his shudder at that was all too obvious. "You could," he said, licking his own lips. "I could come from that." He shifted his hips to move just slightly further down on JC's thumb, and smiled at him.

"Yeah, you want this," JC murmured, his eyes getting darker. "I know you do. And I was worried you wouldn't let me ... " He trailed off as he eased Chris's leg off his shoulder so he could kneel up and grab the lube.

"No, I'll .. you can ... yes," stammered Chris. "Just yes." For just a moment he felt like JC was moving away, then he realizing that he wasn't moving away at all, just moving on. And Chris was ready for it.

"I'm just going to use my fingers first, again," he explained, smearing the lube on his hand. "Love you. Let me know if it hurts ... " He kissed his knee and he bent over, again, slipping one of the fingers of his slickened hand in beside his thumb.

"It doesn't," murmured Chris, and hoped that would be true the whole time. It didn't hurt at all, just felt ... neat. And he was surprised to realize he was pretty sure he could take more already. He'd been right about the bath doing wonders for him, even as short as it had ended up being. "Feels great."

"It does," JC murmured, exhaling when he hand his finger in far enough that the rest of his hand was pressed flush against his body. Slowly, tentatively, he curled it in the way he did earlier, the way that made Chris feel so incredible.

Jolts went up Chris's spine again, in a way that was completely new to him. With anyone else, and having sex in any other way, all of the sensation was concentrated in his groin. But not anymore. "Jesus you're amazing," he muttered, not stopping to think about the words that were coming out. "Love you, JC, do it again. Again."

JC murmured his agreement, and obeyed, before again following his ealrier pattern and pulling that finger out completely before replacing it with two at once. The lube made it seem so easy, so natural and good and *tight*. But a good tight.

"Yeah," moaned Chris, trying his damnedest to arch toward him. "Fucking *yeah*, JC. Like that." The sensation of being filled was a little more familiar now, and he didn't think it could get better than this, but every time he thought that, JC gave him something more.

"Fuck," JC muttered in reply, gripping Chris's knee and pressing closer so he could rub his cock against Chris's thigh as he continued to stroke his fingers in and out of Chris's body. "That working, baby?" he asked, curling and stretching his fingers.

"M-more," said Chris, surprising both of them as he thrust himself back against JC's hand. He could feel himself stretching a lot more easily now, his skin softened, his muscles relaxed, his concerns banished by how well this had gone the first time. "I'm ... ready. More."

JC ducked his head to kiss Chris's knee, and pulled out again before taking an audible breath and slipping three fingers in -- just to the first set of knuckles, and bunched tightly together, but the difference in the girth was noticeable.

Chris gasped a little before moaning again. It felt good, but *big*, and he knew very well it wasn't as big as it got. He taken bigger before, of course, but never JC, and never when he knew it was going to be good enough to make him scream, probably.

"I'm okay," he said quietly, wondering if JC needed to hear that. "I'm ... good. Really good." More tentatively than before he moved himself against Chris's hand, but still, nothing hurt. Not even a little.

"You are good," JC whispered to him, pushing in a little deeper, inch by inch. "*God*, you're fucking good, Chris, and I want in you so bad ... do you think you can? Do you want to try?"

Chris hesitated, then nodded. "I want to try," he said. "Just a little more of this and I want to try. I want to *have* you ... inside me ... making me feel like this ... " Making him moan and grunt and yell, probably, if it was anything like he was now expecting. It certainly wasn't going to be the few moments of pain followed by the reckless thrusting that he'd felt before.

JC shuddered against him; Chris could feel just how much he wanted him, from the damp press of his cock still nudging at his thigh. "I'll be so careful," he murmured. "I'll take such good care of you ... I hate you making me wait ... " His fingers were still slow, and steady, though, making Chris doubt how much he really 'hated' him.

"Just make me ready," murmured Chris, wriggling against him, desperate once again to feel more. "Just make me ready and then yes ... you can. I want you to so much, JC ... "

Chris could feel the pull, the tug, as JC spread all three fingers out. "Oh, god, baby, you're still so tight ... I'm gonna just suffocate inside you, I know I am ... " He didn't sound *worried*, just ... eager.

"Yeah, well, I'm not *used*," Chris gasped out, teasing him with a shaky grin. "Can you now, JC? Can we ... ?" He bit his lip to keep from crying out as JC spread the fingers out further, feeling like every nerve in his body was being stimulated.

JC smacked his hip gently as he sat up again, moaning a little as the contact against his cock was taken away. "Don't be insulting," he murmured, bending over to grab a condom. "I belive you *contribute* to the fact that I'm so used." Manuevering the condom on one handed, he slipped his fingers out, one at a time as he kept thrusting with the remainder.

"Yes, and happily, too," said Chris, moaning at the loss and deciding that biting his lip wasn't the best idea after all. JC seemed to like the noises, and if he bit any harder he'd be drawing bood anyway. "But it's your turn, baby ... " He squirmed in anticipation, knowing it was making things more difficult for JC but not able to help it.

JC pulled his last finger out, then reached up over Chris's head to grab a pillow. "Here," he murmured, shoving it under his hips. "Now. Anything feels funny, strange, not-good?" he breathed heavily. "You stop me. Right?"

"If something feels not good, I'll let you know," promised Chris. He was pretty sure that funny and strange were inevitable, though, so he planned to let those pass uncommented. "I won't let you do anything I don't want."

"You shouldn't have let *anybody* do anything you don't want," he heard JC mutter under his breath, but didn't have time to comment before he felt the slick, hot hot HOT press of JC's cock at his opening.

He exhaled slowly, trying to keep himself from trembling from the unbearable anticipation. "I'm good," he murmured again, keeping JC up to the moment on how he was doing with this. "I'm ... yes. Ready." He knew that any moment JC was going to slowly press inside. And carefully, because he was JC and he was like that.

"God," JC grunted, pushing the head inside ... and there, Chris thought, that wasn't so bad, wasn't as much or as thick or as tight as his fingers had been. "Oh, holy fuck, Chris, I totally ... forgot ... "

Chris's breathing was heavy and rapid anyway, as JC began pushing inside. "Yeah," he murmured. Only he hadn't forgotten, he'd just never know what this could be like, on this side of it, for him. "Oh, JC ... " he moaned, his eyes fliuttering shut.

"You're so hot," JC hissed, gripping his hip and moving it gently to a different position as he pressed in deeper. "God. *God*, this is hard, baby ... want to be *in* there ... "

"Doing good," said Chris, feeling full like he hadn't in a long long time. Or ever -- this was just so different from the other times, and he was so very glad he's always been this conscientious with his partners. "Doing really *fucking* good, JC. Not hurting ... at *all* ,,, "

"Oh, good, baby ... " JC sighed, pushing further and resting his forehead on Chris's shoulder as he did. "Trying to ... go slow ... " He could feel the sweat breaking out on JC's back as he moved above him. "Thanks," Chris murmured softly, almost inaudibly, shifting his hips up higher again and trying to make it easier for JC to slide inside him. He wouldn't have been able to do this if JC hadn't being going as slow as he was. Well, he would have been *able* to, but he wouldn't have enjoyed it, not the way he most definitely was. "You can ... yeah. Inside me."

"Tell me if it hurts," JC reminded him, grunting as he pressed even closer and Chris figured he *had* to be almost all the way in. "You can't let me hurt you, baby ... I just want to do this right ... " JC's insecurity and hesitancy might have been a bit of a turn-off, if it wasn't obvious how much he really *was* into it.

"I will," Chris said, and punctuated it with a slight moan that surprised him as much as it seemed to surprise JC. "I promise ... I will." It was definitely moving from a bit strange but nice, to full-on good. Definitely not painful, in any case, which was also a surprise but a surprise of the best kind.

"Fuck, fuck fuck fuck," JC muttered, barely audibly, as he pushed Chris's legs wider until Chris finally felt his thin hips pressed against his ass. "Oh, god. And, um. Tell me when I can move ... ?"

Chris used his silence to make them pause for a moment, getting used to the feeling of utter fullness. He felt stretched but not sore -- not yet, anyway -- and he could even feel JC's heat inside him, he thought. "Okay," he said a few moments later, after taking a deep breath and exhaling slowly to make sure his body was calm and relaxed. "Okay yeah, I'm good, go ahead ... "

JC ran a shaky hand up the outside of Chris's thigh before withdrawing slowly, enough so that he could lift Chris's hips a little with his other hand. Chris could feel the angle of their bodies change, and then when JC pushed back inside, he could *really* feel the angle. But then JC pulled out again, too quick.

Chris moaned again, both from the all-too-brief sensation and from the withdrawal, a mixture of pleasure and frustration. "I'm good," he assured JC desperately, wanting him back like he'd never wanted it before. "I'm ready. *Please*, JC ... "

"Did you like that?" JC whispered, before pushing his hips back in and withdrawing again right away, not giving either of them enough time to savor JC being buried deep inside Chris's body. "Am I getting it right ... ?"

"Now you're just being a tease," Chris accused him breathlessly, trying to hook a leg around him to pull him back but it was just too awkward, he was just too unused to being in this position to do much of *any*thing. "Want you so bad now."

"I'm not teasing you," JC protested, looping his hand under Chris's leg, helping him wrap it around him, but still not thrusting back in. "I don't want to just ... hammer away at you. I'm trying to do it the way *you* do it."

Chris grinned at him in spite of himself. "Are you saying I tease you, then?" he asked, happy to be able to grip him with that leg and tug on him just a bit. "Thank you, JC, you're wonderful ... but I'm ready for more now, a little. Don't worry ... I'm not gonna break." He settled himself back into the bed and tried to move against JC when JC wasn't moving back against him. He didn't necessarily want JC to lose control with him, but he *was* ready for a little more now, a little longer and maybe even a little harder.

JC shivered a little when Chris's hips shifted with the change in position, and he smiled down at him. "It's not teasing if you know you'll get what you want eventually," he murmured. "That's how I can handle it when you do it, at least." He circled his own hips then, slowly, and sank back in to Chris's body.

Chris inhaled sharply, then smiled up at him again. "You're right," he said, his breathing ragged. "You're just making me want you so bad. So I guess you're doing it just exactly right ... " He had already gotten a pretty clear idea of how seldom JC did this, but JC was just so exquisitly good you'd never be able to tell.

"The thing is," JC whispered, surprising Chris by continuing to push against him, even though he was already as deep as it seemed like he could be, "I've really been paying attention. To this guy who *always* does it right. Anything you like that I do ... you can thank him for ... "

"Remind me to do that later," Chris gasped out, feeling like JC was trying to crawl inside him. "Right now I'm too busy thanking the guy who's *doing* it. Jesus, JC ... " He squeezed JC with his leg and tried to convince himself to surrender control to him, because he was sure now that whatever JC did, it would feel good.

JC twisted his hips once more, rolling up into Chris's body, biting haphazardly at his shoulder before pulling out unpredictably again. "I want you to like it," he mumbled plaintively, panting a little himself.

"Well, you don't need to worry about *that* anymore," said Chris with a short chuckle as he tried to push back against him again. He hadn't realized how much he *wouldn't* be able to do that, from this position; he was learning a lot. And maybe, in the back of his mind, plotting a few new things to try with JC when he was on the other end again.

Smiling affectionately down at Chris, JC licked his lips and then pressed back in slowly -- obviously aiming right for Chris's prostate, because he hit it dead-on and then wouldn't *move*. "You *sure* you like it?"

Chris bit his lip and pressed against him, digging in his heel. "Now *that*," he said with a reckless gasp, "is teasing." He wasn't sure how much of the sensation he could take; it was already threatening to overwhelm him. He wasn't sure whether to cry or scream or beg JC to just fuck him until he came. He ended up doing a combination of all three, letting out a short cry as his eyes filled, clutching at JC and trying to ride him from underneath.

And some or all of that must have made it impossible for JC to keep it up, to continue to focus so completely on what he was doing to Chris and keep his *own* needs in the back of his head. His first real thrust, meeting Chris's desperate movements, was too weak; but when Chris didn't push him away, didn't whimper or flinch, he got more daring.

"Yes," he said fervently as JC started to thrust inside him, still so very carefully and almost protectively. But he was stretched out enough now that it wouldn't be painful if JC wanted to make love to him the way he had made love to JC so many times -- not the hard, fast times but the slow, tender and still very hot times. "Yes, JC, yes." And he didn't think he could be much clearer than that.

JC swallowed audibly, and let go of Chris's hip to grab one of his hands and clasp it against the bed. "God, baby," he moaned, both of them gasping when their hips met with constant rhythm. In all the ways JC had been unpredictable before he was consistent now, a perfect, perfect pattern. "Is this right?"

"Oh yeah," said Chris, his eyes fluttering closed for a moment. They'd begun that relentless push towards orgasm now, and he realized that for the first time, ever, he might come while being fucked. "Oh, JC, it's wonderful ... " He might have cringed at the flowery language it it weren't the exact right word for what he was feeling, both physically and emotionally.

"Tell me when you're close, honey," JC whispered in reply, before tilting his head again and continuing to focus on the way he moved above Chris, the way he wouldn't speed up or slow down but starting to dig in a little extra at the end of each thrust.

Chris just moaned again in reply, and snaked a hand down to begin stroking himself as he and JC moved together. "I'll try," he promised him, but that was *all* he could promise ... he wasn't sure how quickly it was going to come on; he'd never been in quite this position before.

JC squeezed the hand he held; seemed unwilling to let go of it to interrupt Chris's motions, and finally released Chris's leg so he could make him stop. "I'll do that," he insisted. "Please. Can't you let me?"

Chris took a moment to unwrap his fingers, hesitant to have even a few moments where he wasn't being stimulated. But he knew how great it would be to have JC do it, to have JC do *everything*. "Yeah, yeah, okay," he said finally, his voice rougher than even he had been expecting. He thought maybe he was starting to get close, though there were so many new sensations mixed up in it it was hard to say, and so he didn't say anything aloud, not yet.

JC smiled at him beautifully, then squirmed up on to his knees so he could reach between their bodies. He started jerking him immediately, a little roughly ... not anything CHris knew JC knew he couldn't take, but more like the way he'd be fucking him if he was less worried. Or less considerate. The movement of his hips slowed a little, there was a tightness at his jaw, but otherwise JC just continued to own his body.

Chris felt a bolt of sensation ball up in his stomach and then shoot up his spine, causing him to gasp and arch his back, arching both into JC's touch and onto his erection. "Fuck, okay, I'm close now," he gasped out, very, very certain of that fact. "You can ... I mean, I can take it if you ... " And he left it at that.

JC smiled again, and leaned down to kiss Chris's nose tenderly -- almost as if they weren't both about to come. "Love you," he mouthed, then closed his eyes under Chris's gaze and dug his knees into the bed, thrusting deep inside Chris's body and jerking up on his cock as he did.

"Oh ... oh!" Chris cried out as JC thrust into him. And then again. "Oh God, JC ... " And then he was coming, sooner than he'd been expecting, and he was glad that he'd at least been able to give JC that much warning. He felt himself grip JC even tighter inside him, which only served to intensify the sensations.

JC was coming too, but he couldn't tell until his own spasms had subsided; JC had buried his face in the crook of Chris's neck in a way that couldn't have been comfortable, his arm all twisted between their bodies, and he hadn't made a sound. *Still* hadn't, even when Chris was fairly certain his orgasm had subsided completely.

"Oh my fucking god," he murmured, as much to himself as to JC, and suddenly he was very, very glad that they'd tried again, and very glad he'd worked up the nerve in the first place. JC had been just wonderful, just amazing, just everything that he knew he could be. "Thank you."

JC exhaled shakily against Chris's chest. "Mmm," he whispered, his chin the only part of his body that moved. "For what, baby? That was ... fuck, I can';t believe you let me ... "

"For something i've never felt before," said Chris, still softly, having trouble finding his voice. "I had no idea it could be like that, for me. That I was even capable of feeling it that intensely. So ... for that, I guess. And that's for being you. And stuff."

"I love you," JC said solemnly, still speaking into Chris's chest. "I would do anything, anything for you. And ... I'm so glad you tried, honey. I hope it'll go a little way toward helping you feel better about it ... "

"Look at me," said Chris, raising his hand to tangle his fingers in JC's hair. "Please, JC, look at me." There were thinks he wanted to say, and he only wanted to say them to JC's face.

JC obeyed immediately, his soft smile not matching how tired and red and strained his eyes looked. And the rest of his body was still motionless, his weight heavy between Chris's legs. "I love you," he whispered again, when he met Chris's stare. "I love you too," said Chris when their eyes finally met, smiling back. "I can't even tell you how amazing that was. Was it ... what you wanted, to? What you were waiting for?"

JC nodded and let his eyes drift closed, but didn't hide his face again. "Wonderful," he murmured. "And I didn't hurt you? You don't hurt anywhere? I didn't squeeze your hand too tight?"

"You didn't hurt me at all," said Chris, wiping at his eyes which he realized -- looking at the image of JC swim in front of him -- were still full of tears. "Not even a little bit JC. I ... wasn't expecting that was even possible for me. So .. thank you."

"Please stop thanking me," JC mumured, blinking his own eyes open again. "I told you, I love you. And I love what we did together, what we do together, and I don't want you to thank me so much, and ... and why are you crying, honey??"

"I'm not," Chris protested, but even he recognized the ridiculousness of saying that while wiping his eyes. "I ... don't know. I just am. But JC, I just want you to understand ... you know I've been with guys before and no one's ever been able to do that for me and ... I just feel like I can't think you enough, for opening up that whole, like, *world* for me."

JC sighed, and stretched up to kiss Chris's lips chastely. "It was ... an honor, baby. I'm just glad I did okay. I was nervous, and ... I'm just glad it was what you wanted. What you *deserved*. And ... I understand, okay? I understand every single time you do it to me."

"And I still want to do that," said Chris, impatient with the chasteness of it and trying to pull JC back for another kiss. "To you. A lot. Maybe we can save *this* for ... special occasions?" Which didn't mean he didn't like it, not even close, but he thought maybe they were both still more comfortable in their other roles. Except sometimes, like right now.

"Whenever you want to," JC agreed, letting Chris capture his lips. "Maybe sometimes when I want to?" He closed his eyes again, and hummed a little. "Ready for me to move, honey?"

Chris braced himself and nodded. "Yeah. Gonna miss you though," he said with a tiny grin, watching JC's face as he started to carefully move out of him. "I don't even know how to describe it. I guess I don't have to .... you already know."

"It's a little lonely," JC agreed. "But ... we can do this again, like you said." He winced himself as he pulled away, glanced apologetically at Chris. "You sure you're okay? Did we use enough lube and stuff?" He turned his back to Chris shyly as he fumbled pulling off the condom.

"JC ... it blew my mind it was so good," Chris confessed. "I just ... didn't know that i could feel like that. I knew that other people could, of course, but just ... not me."

JC turned halfway back to him. "I'm sorry," he said quietly. "I still feel like maybe we should've done this sooner, then. I don't ... I'm not sure what I'm supposed to say."

"Anything but that," said Chris firmly. "JC, we weren't ready to do it sooner. Or ... I wasn't. I don't know about you. So don't you be saying that, okay? It's nonsense. We loved what we were already doing, and this is just ... something more now." Though he thought he might do a little experiementing of his own, now that he knew how good it could feel for him.

"You're like the only person that can make me feel so awkward, baby," JC bent his head. "And that's not a bad thing, even though I guess it sounds like it. What I mean is that ... I guess you're the only person that can make me worry. About how a boyfriend's supposed to be."

"He's supposed to be just like you," said Chris, reaching out to stroke his bare flesh soothingly. It was beginning to cool, and felt damp against his fingers. "And that's all I want him to be like. Ever since we got together everything's been just great between us. We understand and respect each other and ... I think that's the important thing. And the sex. The sex is good too."

Even if Chris couldn't quite see it, he knew JC was smiling. "Well, yeah, the sex," he murmured, before standing all the way up and cracking his back. "Everything has been great. I'm not doubting *us*. Just ... you know. Me."

"Well, don't," said Chris stubbornly, trying to tug JC closer again, wanting to be just held for a little while. "You're the greatest boyfriend and I don't want you to change a bit. You ... gonna come back now?"

"I have to throw this *away*," JC chuckled. "Leggo, you limpet. I'll come back and make you cuddle with me in a minute." He shoved Chris playfully and walked over to the trash, then returned. "See? Not long, even."

"You need to move the trash closer to the bed," pouted Chris as he tugged him closer again, insistently. It was the only thing he wanted right then, to be able to feel JC still there. His body was still almost vibrating for the experience and he still hadn't completely processed it.

JC lay carefully on his side next to Chris, putting his palm flat on his belly, rubbing at the mess they'd made. "Yeah? And you need to stop bossing me around in my own house, you big bully." He nuzzled carefully at Chris's neck.

"Then you need to stop leaving me alone in bed after fucking me silly," teased Chris, wrapping his arm around him and all but clutching him as they lay there. "See that it doesn't happen again."

"You're going to steal my lunch money now, aren't you," JC whispered, using his fingertips to push Chris's chin up and kiss him gently. "It's always the skinny guy that gets picked on ... "

"Yeah, by the short guy," snickered Chris before kissing him back. "I just ... kinda need right now is all. So don't go anywhere, all right?"

"I'm *not*," JC protested, frowning and kissing Chris harder. "I'll stay here with you all night, if you want. Just ... you don't have to worry. What happened to my cocky boy who knows what he wants, and makes sure he gets it?"

"Oh, I got it all right," said Chris, squirming against him. "Now I'm just ... processing it a little. Come on, this is all new and different for me, I can't be cocky ALL the time. Well, I guess I could be ... but then how would I keep you guessing if I did that?"

JC chuckled and relented. "Okay. *Okay.* But still. Just because it was me inside you, doesn't mean you have to be all ... quiet. And soft and stuff. Like ... I understand it's a big deal. It's always a big deal to me too, no matter how casual I come across when I tell you I want you to fuck me. I just ... the quiet makes me nervous."

"I'm not being *quiet*," argued Chris as he snuggled in against him. "But I'm afraid I can't do anything about the soft. You wore me out there, big boy. And .... to be honest? We're being honest right?" He didn't wait for a nod from JC; of course they were being honest. "It was kinda more like my first time, than any other time. So yeah. That's why."

JC chewed on his lip, then bent his head to kiss Chris's hair. "I love you. I love that you trust me. I hope you think I deserve it. I hope you can help *me* think I deserve it." He let his head trail shakily down Chris's side. "God, sometimes it feels like I don't."

"Why on earth would you think you don't?" asked Chris, reaching to tug JC up next to him and wrap his arms around him, leaving them face to face. He covered JC's hand with his own. "Seriously. I want to know. Because I *know* you deserve it."

"I just ... sometimes I think I don't take relationships seriously enough. Or people's feelings. Not you, but ... other people." His eyes were shut tightly. "Someday that has to catch up with me, being so inconsiderate. Of other people."

"I've never known you for one second to be inconsiderate," said Chris, surprised by that. "Not of me, not of Joey, not of Justin ... and I guess I haven't seen you around anyone else so I couldn't say, but that's a pretty good start. How do you think it's gonna catch up with you?"

"I don't know," JC shook his head. "Never mind, I'm being ... melancholy. Or morose or something. Definitely self-pitying. I just ... the whole point was that I never let guys over before, I kind of ... used them. Sometimes, some of them. DOn't you believe in karma?"

"Yeah, sometimes the things you do to people come back to bite you in the ass," agreed Chris slowly, "but then karma also works if you do good stuff for people. And I *know* you've done a lot of *that*. So I guess *my* point is ... you just made love to me, so you just have no reason to be self-pitying right now. Because I *know* it was good."

"Thank you, honey," JC replied softly, kissing Chris's cheek softly. "I really ... like, I wasn't kidding when I said I was really just doing what you've taught me the last couple weeks. I've never slept with anyone better, and I dream about the first time you made love to *me* -- in here, remember? on our sides -- like ... every night. Every night."

"I guess being in love *does* make a different," said Chris with a slight grin, just taking in the way JC looked right then and feeling in love all over again. "Who knew? But hey, I plan to enjoy every moment of it. I dream about you, too, you know ... and mostly they're really beautiful sexy dreams. But then sometimes you're in this clown suit on top of the Eiffel tower and ... well, we just won't get into that."

JC laughed out loud, and gave Chris a dazzling smile. "I'm making you tell me that one sometime," he insisted. "But right now? Can you ... would you mind telling me one of the beautiful sexy ones? I'm trying hard not to feel like an insensitive ... guy ... and that might help."

"I don't know how you're possibly feeling insensitive right now," insisted Chris, nuzzling his throat for a moment. "But okay ... sometimes I think about you and me going away somewhere together. There was this place that my mom took me when I was a kid, her friend owned it and we stayed there for a couple weeks. Um ... anyway, she had this huge stone fireplace that I just gawked at when i first saw it, and I've never forgotten it. And sometimes I have these dreams where you and me are there and we're making love by that massive fireplace and just far away from the rest of the world. No bearskin rug, though, so don't worry. I'm not *that* tacky. -->

And anyway, I'm inside you and I'm staring at your eyes and they're just the brightest, most beautiful things I've ever seen in my whole life. And you're saying things to me, just little things, that are making me so hot and so in love with you." He grinned sheepishly and looked up at JC's face. "I have kinda elaborate dreams about us."

JC blinked at him, his mouth working soundlessly. "Oh," he breathed finally, just as Chris started to worry that he really wasn't getting any oxygen. "Oh -- Chris -- that's ... God, just not at *all* what I expected you to say." He was smiling, though, like he couldn't help it, and quite obviously blinking back the start of tears. "You remember them?"

"Yeah, I remember dreams a lot," said Chris, staring at him wondering and touching his face gently. "What, you weren't expecting my romantic side to come out? I have dreams about the library, too, but we've already *done* that .... " Despite the gently teasing, though, he was just stunned by JC's reaction to his words.

JC laughed weakly, then turned his head to kiss Chris's thumb. "It's not that, I just ... ok, maybe it's a little bit that. You just ... keep surprising me, and it's amazing, and I ... " He lost his voice, staring into Chris's eyes so hard Chris wondered if he could even see him through the moisture brimming over. "Can you get dressed? And come with me?"

Chris looked at him in surprise, then just nodded. He didn't figure there was any way that JC would have asked something like that if it wasn't important to him. "Sure," he said softly, stroking down to JC's chin and then letting his hand fall away. "Do I get to know where we're going?"

JC helped him sit up, then slipped off the bed and walked to his dresser. He tossed the cordless phone over onto the bed next to Chris, and looked at him carefully. "I'll tell you if you want me to," he said softly. "After you call your mom and ask her to feed Rocky tonight? And, um ... tomorrow?"

"Sure," said Chris again, more curious than every now at what JC was up to. He dialed his mom's number from memory and was more relieved than disappointed when he got the machine. "Hey mom," he said, and couldn't help smiling. "I'm gonna need you or one of the girls to feed Rocky for me for a couple days, okay? I'm gonna be away. Leave me a message if you need t." He hung up the phone and tossed it back on the bed, watching JC. "I'm done," he said, unnecessarily.

JC's mouth quirked into a nervous smile. "Is that a hint that I'm supposed to tell you now?" he asked, tugging on a clean pair of underwear and then tossing another pair over to Chris, blushing only a little bit at what Chris assumed was them sharing underwear.

"Well, if you want to," amended Chris as he finally got up off the bed and pulled them on. "I guess you don't *have* to ... but I'd hate to be the only one sharing here."

"I want to do all that," JC said quickly, turning back to the dresser and digging around for a pair of jeans that he pulled out triumphantly. "The stuff you were talking about in that dream. I, um ... my parents. Have this cabin. Like a three-hour drive? Fireplace and everything, and I thought ... " He shrugged his shoulders. "And what do you mean, the only one sharing??"

"I meant my dream, that I shared," said Chris, grinning broadly. "You ... they do? Any you want to take me? I ... " He just grinned at JC foolishly for a long moment. "I have *no* idea what to say. Wow."

"Say you'll go," JC said softly, pulling on his jeans but leaving them unbuttoned as he walked over to stand in front of Chris. "Say it's something you'd dreamed about *happening*, not just... dreamed about wishing for. Say you'll ... let me take you away from your thesis for just a day or two, so all you have to do is just ... *be* with me, and learn more how fucking obsessed with you I am."

Chris was still grinning when he kissed him softly. "I was ready to say yes before I even knew what it was," he admitted, feeling all shaky inside. He hadn't thought it was possible to love JC more; now he knew it just kept getting bigger and better. "Now that I know ... wow. Yes, yes, yes. I'm so amazed by you right now, JC, you can't even imagine."

JC cocked his head, not quite grinning, but not serious either. "What for?" he said quietly, holding Chris to him, and kissing his neck. "It was your idea."

"It was my dream," corrected Chris softly. "My fantasy. And you ... you're making it come true for me. And yeah, I know, that's about as cheesy as it gets, JC, but do you even *know* what that means to me? Do you? I'm ... " He shook outwardly then, in JC's arms. "I love you."

"I love you," JC replied softly. "So, so much. I told you I'd do anything for you, and I *meant* it, and this ... this is why you should always tell me. I fucking ADORE you, Chris. You have to let me do the things I can." He smiled and kissed his forehead, his cheeks. "The great thing is, it means you can't make me rest my ass any more."

Chris laughed quietly. "Tired of that already, are you?" he teased, running a hand down over JC's ass. "Well, I still want to use my tongue for a while. If I tell you it's part of the fantasy, will you let me?" He kissed JC before he could answer, though. "I'll tell you all about my other dreams too. Well, except the clown one, I don't really want to see that one come true .. "

"Too late," JC murmured, pressing against him. "You already said you were inside me, and looking in my eyes while you made love to me." His voice sounded soft, needy. "You already said it, Chris. So you can't say no now."

"Shhh, honey," said Chris when he realized that JC actually needed to hear it. He stroked his back lovingly. "I was teasing. That's just exactly what I want to do to you. With you. Tonight? Maybe?"

"Okay," JC nodded. "Okay, Chris. Just let me grab some food and stuff before we go, and leave a note for Joey -- " He pulled away and flitted around the room. "Can you just wear some of my clothes, so we don't have to go by your place? You have your toothbrush here and that way we might get there before dark. And then there's the cutest little store up there, we can get the rest of the food there tomorrow morning. That is, unless you decide you don't like the place, in which case we *don't* have to stay, just to make *me* happy ... "

"Shhh," said Chris again, but gave up on trying to catch JC and hold him once more. "I'm sure I'm gonna love it. And I'll wear your stuff, or we can raid Joey's closet or whatever. Find something that fits. But I'm not wearing Joey's underwear. I mean, there are limits ... "

"Well, and plus Joey only owns like two pairs of underwear," JC said, grinning, looking relaxed again once Chris was holding him still. "And plus ... the clothes are just for the drive up, and the trip to the store ... " he winked at him. "The rest of the time, you're staying naked."

Chris grinned back at him. "Then whatever you throw at me will be just fine," he said. "I'm not picky. Just as long as your parents don't spring a surprise visit on us." He wrapped an arm firmly around JC's waist so he couldn't go anywhere this time, not without a little effort. "And Joey's underwear habits? Not something I needed to know."

JC chuckled and kissed Chris's neck, but he did try to pull away. "They're in Europe right now, I think you're safe," he whispered conspiratorally. "But come on, baby. Let me go so I can finish packing this stuff up. If you want to help, you can go raid the pantry ... "

"Just give me a minute, okay?" said Chris, rocking him a little. "Just a minute, that's all I want, then I'll go stuff a bag full of food for us." He leaned up to kiss JC gently, looking for a moment of calm just between them before they took off on this spur-of-the-moment adventure.

"Okay," JC replied quietly, his eyes never opening back up after Chris pulled away from the kiss. "Anything for you, Chris. Like I said ... I'll give you everything I can, everything I have ... you just have to tell me you want it."

"You already know what I want," said Chris, pecking him on the lips one more time before releaseing him. "Just you. Just for us to be honest with each other and try and be happy. And sugar, I want sugar, too. Can I pack that bag of cookies?"

JC swayed a little after Chris let go, before shaking his head slightly and turning back to the dresser. "You can pack *some* of them. Put them in a ziploc or something. I'm going to make you ration them." His back was to him completely, but Chris could still feel how much he meant it when he said "I love you" as he dug through his shirts.

"You're as bad as my mother," complained Chris, but he was smiling. "I never should have told you. So what do you want to bring with us, anyway? Am I supposed to surprise you?" If it was up to him, he'd probably sweep off the shelf into a bag and sort it out later.

JC laughed and snapped a tee shirt at him. "No. I'm scared about what you'd pick. Just ... cabin food, Chris. Hot chocolate, marshmallows. Crackers and cheese. If you want ... if you'd like to ... there's a jar of caramel sauce in there too. For, um." He blushed. "Dessert. Maybe."

"Ain't no 'maybe' about it," joked Chris, leaning on the doorframe and watching JC for another moment. "Okay. I'll be good, as long as I know I'm getting chocolate. And JC?"

"Mmm?" JC murmured, distracted once again, kneeling down in front of his closet to pull out a duffel bag. "What do you need, baby."

"Thanks. For this," said Chris, still watching him. "It ... means a lot to me."

JC turned around slowly, still crouched on the floor, obviously hearing something in Chris's voice he needed to respond to. "Does it," he replied, not a question. "That's good, because it's special to me too. I've never done anything like this with anyone, for anyone. But ... you don't have to thank me."

"Maybe I want to thank you," said Chris insistently. "Maybe it makes *me* feel good to thank you. I'll ... " He gestured at the door, then backed a couple steps out it. "I'll pack that food now, JC. It won't take long ... "

"Wait," JC said, standing up, holding his hand out to Chris. "Wait. I didn't mean to ... are you okay? I wasn't trying to, like, make light of your feelings, or anything, I just ... " He appraoched Chris carefully. "Just wait. You don't have to go do that now, I'm sorry. Just ... come here and sit while I finish with the clothes, and we can do the food together. Okay?"

"I'm okay," said Chris, going towards him anyway. "I can get the food, unless you don't trust me not to sneak in a bunch of those coconut rings. Which, actually, you shouldn't trust me with anyway ... " he reached out and touched JC's arm. "Why don't you like me to thank you? Do you not think it's sincere or something?"

"No, I just don't think you need to. I mean, it's nice that you feel like you should, or whatever, but ... " He shrugged, and tugged on Chris's arm. "I don't do some things so well. Like, boyfriend-things. So when I get a chance to do something to make you happy, I want you to feel like it's something I'd do for you automatically. Does that make sense?"

"I say thanks for the automatic things, too," protested Chris. "I say thanks when you make me a *sandwich*, JC, so you gotta expect I'm gonna say it for something like *this*, where you're being all practically devoted to me and stuff. And I think you're a just fine boyfriend, for the record."

"Thank you," JC said softly, and smiled. "I'm trying. You make it easy, when the things you want are the things I can actually give. So just ... sit there, okay? And keep me company. And then I'll come keep YOU company when we do the food. And I won't ever kick you out to try and be efficient ever, any more."

"Just be you, okay?" said Chris. "Just be that guy I fell for, 'cause that's all I want from you, really. I've always liked who you are. All of it." He never minded when JC got a bit queeny or when he ordered pink drinks or when he got as obsessed as he did over studying or when he was all wrapped around him, or even when he was impatient and cranky. Because it was all JC.

JC blinked, and leaned over and kissed him. "You too. You, too, Chris. So don't ... you don't have to get rid of Rocky. Okay?" Chris knew JC probably felt that was a weak reply, but just didn't know how to say it otherwise.

Chris smiled at him and kissed him back, trying to say he understood. "I'll make up my own mind about that, though, okay? That's just ... me being practical for once, the Rocky thing. I'm still me, even if I have to go to my mother's place to see my cat. She'll be glad to see me more often, I bet. And you, for that matter." He hadn't meant to get on a tangent about the cat again, but it kinda said what he wanted it to.

"If you're sure," JC murmured, then kissed Chris again, like he'd given up on getting out of there quickly completely. "I love you. I love you. Chris, I do."

"I love you, too," said Chris, sounding calmer than he felt. "I've never met anyone who would bend to my whims like you." He grinned to show he was teasing, but it was half-true. He *hadn't* ever been with anyone who was so absolutely conscientious about doing what *he* wanted. "Can we bring Doritos, too?"

"Whatever you want," JC murmured again, and smiled, and Chris smiled back, thinking that it seemed as perfect as everything else about the two of them together.

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