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The questions came more frequently in the States now that both groups had hit big. Nsync right on the Boys' heels, snapping like rambunctious untrained puppies. And it wasn't that it wasn't expected. They knew the answers they were supposed to give. "They seem nice enough." "We're just trying to do our own thing." "The market is big enough for everyone." But it wasn't what the reporters wanted, and it didn't stop the constant prodding, and after awhile, Kevin began to think 'what the hell?' It was there, and maybe he couldn't talk about all of it, but they might as well feed the reporters a little. Just a little might get them to talk about something else. "What do you think about Nsync?" the reporter asked. Her name was Sharon, and Kevin kept it in the back of his head so that he could properly say goodbye later, but until then she was simply 'the reporter.' "They're okay," Nick jumped in, eyeing Kevin the entire time to make sure Kevin intended to take over for him. "We've hung out a few times. They're nice guys." Kevin sighed. "We don't have anything against the guys in Nsync personally, but there are some circumstances that are pretty weird." The reporter opened her eyes wide and looked particularly interested. She reminded Kevin of a French teacher he had had in ninth grade, and suddenly Kevin felt incredibly old, and he shook his head and tried to regain his train of thought. "Our old management started Nsync behind our backs. While we were working hard in Europe to keep all the doors open there and in the USA, they could just ride on our wave." Kevin could see Nick nodding vigorously out of the corner of his eye. Nick had the five ninja's in the front pocket of the backpack he brought everywhere with him, Kevin knew. And the backpack was probably a stone's throw away, back in the hall with their coats. All five ninjas, traveling the world. Battling the world. Backstreet Boys. Who knows what became of the small pink ninja? Perhaps it still sat abandoned in a potted plant somewhere in Germany. "Our management repeated everything they had done with us," Kevin continued, " with them. They got the same songwriters and the same producers. They were even brought to the same artists that we had been. They got very much for free. Now we have changed management and our record company, but we hardly got signed on Zomba Records before Nsync also got signed there. That's actually pretty weird." Nick was still nodding and the reporter bobbed her head as well, and Kevin figured he had said enough to satisfy her. She didn't move onto the next question though, and after a few moments of awkward silence Nick picked up where Kevin had left off. "I remember that we used to eat on a restaurant in Orlando called The Outback Steakhouse," Nick continued. "You've probably heard of it. I think it's a chain or something." Kevin shot Nick a look, but Nick shrugged and continued, "One of the waiters always used to talk with us and he said that he also sang, and that he dreamed he would be a part of a band like the Backstreet Boys. "He had called up our manager." Kevin supplied. "That was Chris Kirkpatrick- he's in Nsync now. Great for him. He's got talent and deserves only success. But he should know that if there hadn't been the Backstreet Boys, there wouldn't have been an Nsync either." And there it was. Kevin had said too much, and he'd hear it from Howie when Howie found out. When they all met up at the hotel and Nick told him. The reporter was smiling, her tape recorder rolling and she glanced at it and then back up at Kevin and Nick. "Thank you, Kevin. Nick. So does this mean that the feud is true? That there is genuine rivalry between the two groups?" "Nah," Nick said. "Maybe a little in the beginning." "They're good guys," Kevin repeated. "We're doing our thing" - and they're doing it as well because Kevin let it happen. - "and they're just trying to do theirs. Nothing wrong with that."  "Dude," AJ said, when Nick inevitably told them how the interview had gone. "Get over it." "He's over it," Howie said, and Kevin nodded. He was sitting on the couch in his suite and Kristin was perched on his lap. He practically had to drag her across the room to get her there, but once there she hadn't tried to escape. At least not until the fellas had barged in with Nick on their tail, feigning annoyance. Kevin kept his grip around her waist. It hadn't been easy. They'd made it almost four years without a breakup that lasted more than a month, but in no way had it been easy. They'd known it wouldn't be, and the breakups were a testament to that. Kevin had cheated. He'd been away so often, alone so long, and there had been times that he'd given in. Twice with Howie, and a few times with fans. But he hadn't lied about it. And not only because Howie hadn't let him this time. A few of the instances caused breakups, but Kristin had her share of things she regretted too, and in the end they were always drawn back to one another. Kevin was thinking about proposing. They weren't spending all of their time overseas anymore and things had improved dramatically with Kevin back in the States. Sure, he was still touring nonstop, but when Kristin wasn't performing, when she was between odd jobs, she was free to travel with him, even to fly out and visit for a weekend. Kevin couldn't imagine not having Kristin to come home to, and everyone was telling him that it was time. He knew it was time. He'd known for a while, but it didn't really hit him until Brian pointed it out, until Howie pulled him aside and asked him when he was going to get on with his life. Soon, he'd replied, and now he was just searching for the right time. "He's over it," Howie said again in response to some remark from Nick. "Mostly." Kevin nodded. "It's just a little hard when you have people reminding you of something you'd really rather forget. When you have it shoved in your face every fucking day." "Ah," Kristin said, finally piecing together what they were talking about. "The great villain of the piece rears his head once again." "There are about fifty villains in this piece," Nick said. Brian laughed. "Ourselves included." "Well," Nick said. "If it wasn't for Chris, I wouldn't have the Backstreet Ninjas. I should thank him sometime." Nick turned and stared at the door for a moment, as though picturing the plastic toys stuffed safely into his bag. He turned back and in an obvious attempt to change to subject to something more fun added, "I have some new sketches, guys. Do you want to see?" "Later," Brian said. "If it wasn't for Chris, do you think you'd have Kristin?" "I knew Howie wanted me long before Chris came into the picture," Kevin pointed out, only partially answering the question. Howie scrunched up his face and shook his head. "Hey," Kristin said. "And he doesn't have me anyway." "No," AJ agreed. "You just hop into his bed whenever he raises a monstrous eyebrow." Kristin opened her mouth as though offended, but her eyes were smiling. She loved it when the boys slipped into that comfort zone and began treating her as one of them. It didn't happen often. Mostly if there was a 'lady' in the room, they toned things down, became more polite, but Kristin had told them time and again that she'd known them before all this, that they didn't need to impress her. Eventually some of it had gotten through. Nick farted in front of her, AJ made sex jokes, and Kevin wondered if she had begun regretting her insistence that courtesy wasn't necessary. After all, they never acted that way around Leighanne. Kevin smiled, sure that Kristin was secretly smug about that fact. "It might not have worked out this way though," Brian insisted. "If it weren't for Howie, I bet you would have screwed things up even worse and Kristin would be long gone." "He's not wrong," Kristin agreed and Howie flashed his most winning grin. "And we probably wouldn't have realized that Johnny and Lou weren't always watching our backs. Even after the surgery. We might have never found the strength to leave them." "Well, then," Kevin said, his voice dripping in sarcasm. "Maybe we should just send Chris a 'Thank You' card. Hell, let's send them to all the Nsync boys. Maybe Lou and Johnny too. We could even send one to Jive." It was a conversation they had had several times before, and Kevin sometimes couldn't tell if the fellas were trying to keep him young or send him to an early grave. "You're a bitter old man," AJ grinned. "And you need to stop blaming yourself for everything," Nick added, his arms folded over his chest with authority. "We don't need you to take the blame for everything. Howie falling off the stage in Zurich, that was totally your fault, and your year of stupid lying and cheating. That was your fault too. But Nsync and Brian's heart and Johnny and Lou? Your dad? You couldn't have stopped those things. They would have happened no matter what, and you know that, and you still get all moody and bitchy about it. Stop blaming yourself." When everyone stopped and stared Nick just shrugged. "What?" "I guess we'll just have to chalk it up to a learning experience," Kevin said, trying to hide his smile. Nick nodded seriously. "Good." He dropped his arms and crossed the room, reaching out a hand for Kristin. She took it and Nick pulled her up from Kevin's lap, pulling harder when Kevin didn't want to let go at first. "Hey," he said, "come on." Once Kristin was on her feet, Nick pulled Kevin up and then started herding everyone toward the door, pushing when they resisted. "Dinner time. I'm starving, guys. Let's go." "You play the cards you're dealt," Kevin's father had always said, "and most of the time you can't change your hand." The mistakes, the things you didn't see, those were the things that really mattered, the things that shaped the man you became. The things that you learned from. Kevin's father was wrong about one thing. Maybe the most important part of it all. Kevin would never have to pick up the pieces alone. |