Title: Green and Red
Author: Arsenic
Rating: G
Fandom: HP
Disclaimer: HP belongs to JK Rowling, Bloomsday, Scholastic and WB. I am just
borrowing concepts and characters.
Summary: Severus has always appreciated one Gryffindor.
For kaiz on her birthday. I'm sorry I couldn't do a
little romance for you, but this is what I've got. I'm sorry I couldn't do an
epic for you, because you deserve it, but um, I found out when your birthday was
a little late for that. All the same, I'm so very very glad you deem me worthy
of friendship. You make my world much more beautiful. Thanks for that.
*
October, 1971
Professor McGonagall wears a lot of green. For a Gryffindor, that is. Severus
knows this shouldn't be reassuring -- he's known better than to judge by
appearances since…well, for a long time -- but it is.
She also gives Severus house points when he answers questions correctly. She
even does so without flinching or curling her mouth into that tiny little moue
of distaste that she gets when a student accidentally transforms a button into a
rock, rather than a spool. Which happens a lot.
Most of the other teachers find ways not to give Slytherins points, but
Professor McGonagall doesn't seem to mind. Sometimes she'll even call on him for
the easy answers, although less and less so as the year progresses. Severus
doesn't really mind; he prefers the challenging ones.
Severus likes Professor McGonagall -- as much as he likes anyone, liking
people is often a pointless past time in his experience -- but he doesn't trust
her. So when she calls out, "Mr. Snape, stay after class," he is
careful not to flinch. People feed on fear. Particularly children's.
He hasn't done anything wrong, not that he knows of, at least. He stays,
obviously, because running just proves guilt and always, always makes the
punishment worse.
When the rest of the students have left -- the Ravenclaws snickering at
Severus's plight and the Slytherins cautiously sympathetic to it -- Professor
McGonagall sweeps around her desk to where he is standing, and it's regal but
not imposing. Severus wonders how she manages that. He doesn't ask.
"You've been doing quite admirably in my class, Mr. Snape."
Severus is not lulled. "I enjoy the work."
"Would you be willing to do a little bit extra outside of class?"
Severus has no interest in labeling himself a teacher's pet. Even if he did,
he'd find a Slytherin allied teacher with whom to do it. Then again, it does him
no good to insult this woman. He does something he hates but that has saved him
more times than he can count. He plays dumb. "I don’t understand,
Professor."
"I need a research aide. You seem like someone capable. The position is
paid, of course. Students haven't so much free time that they can afford to
spend it working without restitution."
Severus can't help the flare of interest that the mention of money sparks in
him, he can't, not when his mum's birthday is quick coming upon him and his
robes could really use some patching so he won't have to spend so much energy on
low-level glamours and it would allow him to buy treats on the train ride home
during the hols. It galls him that she's caught his attention so easily. He
wonders if she knows about his situation and that thought is enough to bring
acid, hot and biting, to the base of his throat. "Is that not usually the
position of a sixth or seventh year?"
The professor's voice is cool as she says, "It's usually the position of
whomever I deem worthy, Mr. Snape."
Worthy isn't a word that many people have applied to Severus in his short
(but rather interminable) time on this earth. That, even more than the money, is
what propels him to ignore every single doubt clamoring about his stomach, his
lungs, his heart, and say, "What would you need of me?"
*
May, 1979
When Severus realizes that -- no matter how pretty Narcissa's smile is, or
how welcoming Tom Riddle's handshake, or how pleasing Nott's wit -- he's not a
murderer, he goes to Albus Dumbledore.
It's not that he trusts his old headmaster. He trusts Dumbledore as much as
he trusts Riddle and perhaps a bit less. There's history there, after all.
Still, when one is intent on bringing down one intensely powerful wizard the
only logical move to make is to join camp with another one. One equally intent
on bringing said wizard down.
Logic is one of Severus' strong points.
He lays the groundwork with Lord Voldemort -- as Riddle has taken to calling
himself, Severus personally thinks he could have managed a better anagram but to
each his own -- cajoles him into letting Severus go back to Hogwarts. After all,
a spy in the tent of the enemies, what could be more useful?
Indeed.
Severus goes back then, back to those halls which echo with safety and danger
and hurt and triumph and a million things that only he knows about. He, and
every other child who has traversed their ways. He goes back to meet his old
headmaster and instead finds himself meeting with the one person in the world
he's never asked to see again.
Professor -- Minerva, he's not a student any longer -- McGonagall stands in
front of him and there is that tiny moue on her lips, the one he's only seen
once before in regards to himself. "Whatever you have to say to the
headmaster, Mr. Snape, I assure you it can be said to me just as easily."
Severus wishes that were so, he dearly does, but whereas the headmaster has
disappointed him often enough to allow Severus an ease in returning the favor,
Severus has only ever been the one to disappoint in this particular
relationship. She fought his decision to give up his aide position in his fourth
year; his fourth year, when the teasing of Potter and his sycophants rose to
nearly intolerable heights concerning Severus's "pandering" to their
Head of House and not even his housemates would support him in that fight, wary
of his relationship with "the Gryffindor harpy." Severus had needed
support. The choice between her support (and the money that came with it) and
that of his classmates had not been an easy one. Not that she would have known
that from his curt refusal to continue. Not that he'd had any ability to do
things any other way, not if he hadn't wanted to cry in front of her. Which he
patently hadn't.
She's still staring, waiting, and Severus has long felt that the best way to
get pain over with is quickly. He snatches the sleeves of his robes (lovely and
new and financed by a certain Dark Lord who shall remain unnamed) and shows her
the Mark. "I've come to defect."
She says, "We're going to need some Veritaserum."
*
August, 1981
Some nights when Severus comes back from the meetings, the times when he
doesn't really have much information and his sessions with Dumbledore are short,
or when he's done something that completely negates his reasons for leaving
Voldemort's followers in the first place, or after Lucius' eyes have been merry
and Severus has laughed along with the joke, some nights he knocks on Minerva's
door and waits to see if she will let him inside.
She always does, of course. Severus wouldn't even knock if she hadn't sought
him out that first time, nearly a year earlier when he'd been wandering the
halls, slaughtering House Points willy nilly where given the chance. He wouldn't
try if she hadn't demanded in that tone of hers, the one that
brooks no argument and never has, that he follow her. He wouldn't if she hadn't
made him tea and served him scones with fresh butter, the kind his family could
never afford when he was a child and which he gorged himself on upon arriving at
Hogwarts. He wonders if she noticed or if they just share a similar fondness for
the spread.
She did, though, and so he knocks, and enters when she opens the door, and
seats himself in one of her chairs and asks something frivolous such as,
"Have you read the latest article on animagic registration?"
She always has, of course, Severus suspects she has eyes in the back of her
head and uses them to catch up on all the latest in academia and current affairs
while teaching classes and possibly baking scones. She makes a small scoffing
noise. "They're fools. Those laws will only ever work when they find a way
to truly enforce them."
Severus agrees, but there's no fun in that, so he argues with her, the same
way he argues with her about quidditch. Severus, for his part, couldn't care
less about the game, but he loves the sharpness to her tone when she defends her
team, the small mote of amusement in her eye that lets him know their hostility
is all in good fun. Besides, Severus feels rather gallant defending the
Slytherin children. It's the first time he's ever had something worthwhile to
defend. Minerva never attacks the children themselves, never. She's still the
only other professor inside Hogwarts who doesn't flinch when giving them points.
Friendly rivalry or no, Severus recognizes an ally. He thinks it may be the
first time he's ever managed to do such and he wishes he could have figured it
out at fourteen, when it might have changed things. Things are as they are now,
though, and Severus is learning to live with that. So long as there are nights
with tea and gentle verbal needling, Severus suspects he might learn to be happy
with it.
Their argument over next week's match comes to a crescendo without Severus
really noticing, his mind on other, less pleasant things. Minerva lays out her
terms: "House who loses buys house who wins firewhiskey. A bottle. Of the
good stuff."
For the first time in his life Severus can afford to do such a thing. Plus,
he's willing to bet she'll share, even should she be the victor. Without even
really sparing a thought to defeat, without caring that it's a possibility,
Severus raises his tea cup. "You're on."
*
April, 1996
Umbridge has driven Albus out of the castle and as contentious as Severus's
relationship with the headmaster sometimes is, this is decidedly a Bad
Situation. Minerva and he have cut back their semi-regular meetings (more semi
than regular, this year has been hellish) because it is causing The Pink Terror
(as Severus personally likes to think of Umbridge) to look askance at him. Not
that Severus minds (well, it's most likely not a good idea for Lucius to get
hold of the idea that Severus is chummy with "the old Gryffindor
harpy" but other than that, his reputation isn't something that keeps
Severus up at nights) but Minerva does, says that they need someone The Crone
(as Minerva likes to call Umbridge when she's not in hearing distance) thinks
she can trust. Sometimes, Severus really hates his life.
He throws caution (years and years of it) to the wind when Minerva is taken
down by a cadre of people unfit to clean her bedchamber, let alone trade hexes
with her. There are times when Minerva's Gryffindor side annoys the living hell
out of Severus. It doesn’t get in the way of his getting her to Mungo's,
fast. That isn't as easy as it sounds. There's no way to
Apparate a second person, particularly not when said person is out cold, and
Severus doesn't think he has the skill to fly her on his broom. He ends up
flooing them in, which is complicated. Minerva is not a small woman, Severus is
no giant, and unlocking the floo wards out of Hogwarts is no picnic. Also, it
means leaving Hogwarts in Filius's hands for a bit. Minerva trusts Filius,
Severus knows, (and she'll just have to do it for him, because Severus has never
much gotten into the habit of trusting others, minus Minerva) but The Pink
Terror is not someone Severus feels enormously confident leaving anybody to face
off to; at least, anyone other than Albus. Who is, he feels the need to restate
mentally, not there.
Despite this worry, Severus stays with Minerva. This is partly out of a lack
of ability to trust the Mungo's staff (he's had too many stays at the place for
that) and partly because…well, he's just not leaving her. Not until she's
woken up and told him to get himself back to the school this instant, "What
in the world were you thinking Severus? Leaving the school to That Woman, I
swear…"
Then, and only then, will Severus leave. Not before he says, "I was
thinking…" only he can’t say what he was thinking because it isn't in
him to say that she wasn't waking up and he couldn't think, couldn’t think at
all. Severus always thinks. His mind is the only thing that has never failed
him. His heart, constantly, his body, occasionally, his spirit…he's not even
sure it's ever entered into the picture, his mind, never. Not before now, at
least. He finally settles on, "I'll go make sure She hasn't burnt the
school down."
Minerva nods. He's nearly out the door when she calls, "Severus."
He turns. She says, "Thank you. For…allowing the school to possibly be
burnt down. For me."
Severus smiles. It's not something he would do for anyone else. It's not
something he often does for her. It’s the only response he knows.